My stepmother's burden is my ex-girlfriend.

Page 40

After all, we were just junior high school students back then. With such a status that meant we had virtually no social power, there were only so many things we could do—let alone spending the night with someone. For us, who hadn't even told our parents about our relationships, that was more unattainable than a dream.

It's definitely not because I don't have the guts.

...Okay, if I had to categorize it, the forest school around May of my second year of junior high could be considered an overnight stay, but at that time, Ayai and I were just ordinary classmates, just boy A and girl A who barely spoke to each other. In terms of presence in the class, I probably wouldn't even qualify as an A, I'd more like a P.

Is it possible for a guy like P and a girl like P to have any funny stories to tell others? No, impossible. It's already a miracle we passed each other by; it's impossible for us to have any embarrassing moments like when we first started dating.

So let's skip this episode about revealing dark history and quickly move on to the modern story, switching to a bloody battle between me and that woman—that's what I was originally thinking.

But I don't know why...

We weren't even nodding acquaintances back then, so logically speaking, it's impossible for us to have any precious memories together.

It's impossible to leave any memories.

Seriously, it was practically like we just brushed past each other.

But I still remember what happened back then.

I remember the first time I glimpsed Ayai Yume's true appearance, back then.

A school in the woods.

I had absolutely no interest in this activity, so I have no recollection of what I did. The only thing I remember clearly is the title of the book I read in my spare time—"The Mathematician Who Couldn't Laugh," by Hiroshi Mori.

For me, novels are just as much entertainment as comics or video games. But it seems that humans have a common bug: just seeing students reading makes me think, "Wow, that's really ambitious." So even if I don't talk to anyone and just enjoy reading, no one criticizes me.

Hearing my description, some people who don't consider reading or video games as leisure activities might pity me, thinking I'm a "lonely and empty guy," but this is my personal way of enjoying my time at the forest school. Reading mystery novels in the mountains has a unique charm, and it's not bad. It makes me wonder if there's a strangely shaped mansion outside the forest.

And so, night fell.

We weren't luxurious enough to sleep in a single room; we just slept in sleeping bags in a place that resembled a banquet hall.

Although we were seated separately, the girls slept in the same space as us. The dark and gloomy space was filled with whispers. They probably thought they were just talking quietly, but when dozens of people are talking together, even the softest voices create a noticeable noise.

I tossed and turned, unable to sleep, and soon climbed out of my sleeping bag and stood up. I could feel the boys around me looking at me with "Is this guy kidding me?" eyes. I picked up my paperback, pretended to go to the toilet, and hurriedly slipped out of the banquet hall that was being used as a large dormitory.

The corridor lights were already off, but the moonlight streaming in through the windows dimly illuminated the wooden floor. With this little light, reading wouldn't be a problem. I moved to a spot a little further from the dormitory-style sleeping area and leaned against the window, gazing up at the sky.

At the time, I was reading a book called "The Mathematician Who Couldn't Laugh," a story closely related to the starry sky. Because I was reading such a book, I unusually wanted to experience the joy of stargazing.

I thought to myself: Oh, it's quite beautiful.

People who gaze at the stars probably only have this kind of feeling. At most, only TV actors or YouTubers might deliberately exclaim "Wow..." in a moment of genuine emotion.

Wow...

Suddenly, the voice came from beside me.

Strange? Is someone watching YouTube? I thought to myself, and when I looked over, I saw a petite girl gazing intently at the night sky through the window next to me.

I generally don't remember the names of my classmates, but there are exceptions.

They are people like me who don't fit in at school.

Although I am well aware that two marginalized people who establish a comfort zone are still just two marginalized people, I will still inevitably and automatically develop a sense of being like them.

Yui Ayai.

I remember that girl; that was her name.

She never left her seat, spending all her time reading. I never saw her talk to any of her friends. Even in this forest school, she seemed unable to integrate into her classmates' circle, spending every moment alone, flustered and furtive.

Let me explain to those who had a smooth time in school: even marginalized people can be categorized into those who are clever and those who are clumsy in dealing with things.

The former can overcome crises on their own even without friends (such as forgetting to bring textbooks), but the latter needs help from others to solve problems. I dare say I'm the type who's quite clever in handling situations, but she... Ayai Yume is clearly the clumsy type.

Seeing someone like her makes me feel a little awkward.

I don't know if it's because I'm like-minded or because I feel awkward, but whenever I see her in trouble, I feel like I'm in trouble too.

In the end, they might even casually offer a helping hand.

Actually, it was the same at noon today. When I was cooking curry at the campsite, I had just given the extra ingredients to her, who hadn't received any.

People like her are never willing to honestly admit they messed up, so others have to take care of and help them. Unfortunately, I'm the only one in our class who can understand the hidden struggles of introverts, so I'm the only one who can help her.

Therefore, the Ayai Yui I know only has two appearances: one is the one where she has nowhere to stay in the classroom, and the other is the one who is fearful and uneasy when I lend a helping hand.

But—at this very moment, there she is…

Her face, illuminated by the hazy moonlight, gazing up at the night sky...

It was an expression I had never seen before—an expression I couldn't put on.

...I felt secretly ashamed.

I discovered that somewhere deep inside me had always looked down on her—and I felt ashamed of that fact.

If it were me now, I would say, "It doesn't matter if that kind of woman looks down on her for the rest of her life." But for a middle school student who lacks consideration, it's already quite good that he knows how to reflect on himself, and that's something to be praised for.

Perhaps my mistake was that I shouldn't have had such thoughts and stared intently at her face.

Ayai looked in my direction...

--Ah...Ah...

He then shrugged in shame and stopped talking.

...Really, this girl is so clumsy.

I don't think a girl like her would sneak out of the dormitory without a reason. She must have something to tell me.

But I think she would be even more scared if I asked her directly, "What do you want?"

...Thinking about it carefully, even if that happened, it wouldn't have affected me. But at that moment, I turned my gaze to the night sky outside the window and said this:

The moonlight is beautiful.

--Oh dear!

It works immediately.

Anyone other than Ayai would probably be stunned and not understand what she meant by those words, but she blushed so much that it was visible even in the dark, and she became even more flustered and her eyes darted around.

—That, that is, that, oh, oh…

That's not what I meant.

I swayed my shoulders and chuckled softly.

Honestly, I don't understand why I joked about her like that. To this day, I still don't understand my mindset at the time. Perhaps I already anticipated that this woman would become unrecognizable. Let's just assume that's how it is.

--Ah...

For some reason, Ayai stared at my face with her mouth slightly open.

I was curious about what she found so strange, but in the end she said nothing, only looking up at me and saying how beautiful the moonlight was.

A cloud drifted in, partially obscuring the bright moon that shone among the stars, then drifted away again. We remained silent, gazing up at the same moon from different windows, separated by only one window.

Soon after, just as thick clouds obscured the moon, I heard a faint, subtle sound:

--...Noon, thank you...I'm sorry.

Before I could even turn around to look at her, she had already run back to the dormitory on a short, quick jog.

As I watched her petite figure disappear down the corridor, it suddenly dawned on me... So that's what she wanted to say when she chased after me.

It wasn't even a chance encounter; it was just a fleeting brush past.

A cause that does not conform to a causal relationship is neither a reason nor an opportunity.

If this conversation, held across a window, is actually the foreshadowing of what happened three and a half months later—that Ayai Yui became my girlfriend—then I'm afraid God has been reading too many mystery novels.

Real life isn't so precise that everything that happens is related to the future.

However, I made a wish against my will, even though I didn't actually find the starry sky particularly beautiful.

It wasn't because of the relationship between a boy and a girl, but because of the camaraderie of both of them struggling to adapt to school.

Hopefully, this forest school trip, which will likely never become a pleasant memory for her, can be made a little more beautiful by this starry sky.

Then I realized that I hadn't told her I was welcome.

Okay, we'll talk about it next time. There will definitely be another chance.

That's what I thought to myself, and two years passed like that.

◆

There's a term called "May Sickness." It refers to the phenomenon where someone gradually gets used to the new life that started in April, and as the weather warms up, they experience a loss of motivation, lethargy, and fatigue. It's truly enviable that others can adapt to their new life in just one month. I still can't adapt to living under the same roof as my ex-girlfriend.

However, in mid-May—this weekend, a week after Mother's Day—I finally had two days to escape this stressful environment. How could I not be happy?

"I have to thank you, Kawanami. Leave the upcoming midterms to me."

"Oh, will you help me with my studies?"

"I'll cheer you on. Keep going!"

"That's it!"

Despite attending a prestigious, elite school, the rebellious boy Kawanami Kogure grumbles incessantly about his hairstyle. He truly doesn't appreciate his good fortune; my encouragement was incredibly precious.

We are on our way from my house to the Kawanami house.

This Saturday and Sunday, for some reasons, I decided to stay overnight at my classmate Kawanami Kogure's house.

Although my biological father and stepmother are remarried, they are still newlyweds, yet they are always preoccupied with each other's children, seemingly unable to maintain any time alone as a couple. So, we, their thoughtful children, have decided to dedicate this weekend to them as a gift.

So, these past two days, Jie Nu will also be staying at her friend Nan Xiaoyue's house.

After about a month and a half, I was finally going to spend the night in a different room from that woman.

……only……

"We're here, my home is right here."

After speaking, Kawanami stopped in front of a somewhat old apartment building. As is typical in the Kyoto area, the apartment building wasn't very tall—maybe ten stories at most.

Led by Kawanami, I walked through the automatically locked entrance hall.

The Kawanami family home seemed to be on a higher floor, so we went to the elevator lobby. Then…

"……Depend on."

"……ah."

I saw faces I didn't want to see.

They were probably waiting for the elevator; two high school girls were standing in the lobby.

One was a petite girl with her hair tied in a lively ponytail. She tied the loose hem of her T-shirt in a knot at her waist, unabashedly showing off her bare, slender legs beneath her shorts. To be honest, her outfit gave off a neutral impression.

It was Nan Xiaoyue.

Standing next to her was a woman with long, unruly black hair that made her look almost ghostly. Today, she wore a white dress, feigning innocence. Despite being just an ordinary person, she exuded an air of sophistication; was this part of her high school career strategy?

It was Irito Yume.

I cast a gaze at Jie with hostility, malice, and coldness. Jie returned the gaze with the same malice, intent to attack, and murderous intent.

Get out of here.

"If you want to leave, why don't you leave yourself?"

"You have other friends."

"Oh dear, I'm sorry. I didn't consider that some people don't have a choice."

We argued back and forth, relying solely on our eyesight.

Finally, Nan's cheerful voice, out of place in the situation, brought the battle against the barren land to an end.

"Ah, it's Irito-san! What's wrong? Is she going to live outside too?"

Nan skipped and hopped up to me, looking up at my face as if she were spying on me.

(Illustration 007)

She wanted to kill me! I said, reflexively backing away.