hold you in my arms tonight

Xie Yuan remembered that when he was a child, his mother's room had large floor-to-ceiling windows, and the white curtains hung down to the floor.Mother likes to stand by the window in a daze, and he likes to hug her leg in the past.

However, at this time, Song Yin would push the child away.

She doesn't like this child, she even hates this child.There was a voice in her heart that kept telling her that if she hadn't had children, she would still be that beautiful and elegant dancer, that she could still wear those slim skirts, and still have a husband who loved her.

Yes, she felt that Xie Huaisheng didn't love her anymore.She always quarrels with Xie Huaisheng, and asks him tearfully and gnawingly, if he despises her or regrets marrying her.

She was caught in her own emotions, completely ignoring the answers Xie Huaisheng told her over and over again.

In fact, Song Yin's appearance and figure have recovered a few years later, and she is still the most dazzling existence in the crowd.It's just that she doesn't believe it.She began to feel inferior and surly.

When Xie Yuan was five years old, Song Yin knew that Xie Huaisheng had an illegitimate son who was only two years younger than Xie Yuan.This news completely broke her down. She tried several times to take Xie Yuan to jump off the building to take revenge on Xie Huaisheng, but all failed.

"So, it's your fault after all," Xie Yuan said.

Xie Huaisheng did not deny that he was wrong.

When Xie Huaisheng met Zhou Wan, it was the time when Song Yin was making the most trouble.He went out to socialize with his friends, and met Zhou Wan at the wine table.He drank too much wine that night and lost control, Zhou Wan half-pushed, and the two hit it off, so Xie Qing was born.

He felt ashamed and treated Song Yin even better, but the relationship between the couple still hadn't broken the ice.Somehow, he had another family outside the Cloud Zone.

Even so, Xie Huaisheng felt that he still loved Song Yin, or in other words, loved the original Song Yin.

After Song Yin knew that Xie Huaisheng had a son outside, he continued to quarrel for two years.Slowly, she stopped making trouble, and Xie Huaisheng thought she had forgiven them, and they could start over.

But later Xie Huaisheng realized that she stopped making trouble because she fell in love with someone else.

That man is Zhou Boan, a psychiatrist.

In the early years, even in a big city like the imperial capital, a psychiatrist was a rare profession.At that time, Xie Huaisheng didn't know anything about how the doctor in Zhou Boyan's private psychological counseling center came into contact with Song Yin.All he knew was that Song Yin started getting divorced after Xie Yuan was seven years old, wanting nothing, property, real estate, and even his own son.

She wholeheartedly pursued the so-called freedom, and vowed that she would escape from the confinement of the wealthy family, return to the stage, and find her own life value.Xie Huaisheng felt ashamed, but he was still unwilling to divorce. He knew better than anyone else that he would never love another person like Song Yin.

At that time, he said to Song Yin, if you want to die, you have to die by my side.

Both Song Yin and Zhou Boyan are from Liucheng, and the topics of conversation between them are more about Liucheng's scenery and food.When Xie Huaisheng found out that Song Yin fell in love with someone else, he was furious, but then he thought of his son who was raised outside, and even thought of discussing with Song Yin, they both betrayed their marriage, it is better to let the past go, and love again.

He wanted to, but Song Yin didn't want to.

In order to win back Song Yin's heart, Xie Huaisheng was even willing to send Zhou Wan's mother and son abroad and never return.At that time, Song Yin only had Zhou Boan in his heart.

In the spring of [-], Zhou Boyan was suppressed by Xie Huaisheng all the way, and finally lost his foothold in the imperial capital.He left the imperial capital in desperation, and his whereabouts are unknown.And Xie Huaisheng and Song Yin ushered in a Cold War period that lasted for more than a year.

Xie Huaisheng began to want to find love again. He felt that the happiest time in his life was the time when he was in love with Song Yin. He began to please Song Yin without dignity or rationality.

He hoped that one day, the woman who smiled brightly at him on the stage back then would come back.

The time came to the early summer of [-], which was the anniversary of Song Yin's father's death. Song Yin proposed to go back to Liucheng to visit the grave.Xie Huaisheng was busy with a big project and couldn't get away, so Song Yin proposed to take Xie Yuan to Liucheng together.

Xie Huaisheng thought about where she could go with the child, so he agreed.As a result, he did not expect that neither his wife nor children came back after this trip.

Probably on the third day after Song Yin arrived in Liucheng, Xie Huaisheng received a call from Song Yin.

Song Yin said on the phone that she had left Liucheng with Zhou Boyan, and she asked Xie Yuan to wait for someone to pick him up in the People's Park.

Her meaning was obvious, she was going to leave with Zhou Boan, she didn't want her son anymore, he should pick him up by himself.

Xie Huaisheng was so angry that his hands trembled because of the phone call, his eyes were full of hatred for Song Yin.

He never wanted to coax, Song Yin even gave up his son because of Zhou Boyan.

Xie Huaisheng's anger and hatred engulfed his reason, he smashed the wired phone to pieces, he didn't care about Xie Yuan's location that Song Yin said on the phone from the beginning to the end.

Xie Huaisheng held on to the last sliver of hope, Song Yin must not have left Xie Yuan behind, as long as he didn't pick him up, then Song Yin would definitely go back to look for Xie Yuan, he would definitely come back.

He waited in the imperial capital for more than a month, but never received a call from Song Yin again.

Xie Huaisheng was betting that Song Yin would not be so cruel.

As a result, he lost, lost Song Yin, lost his own son.

Xie Huaisheng later sent people to search near the park in Liucheng, but they did not find Xie Yuan.He wondered if it was possible that Song Yin took Xie Yuan away with him, but two years later, he finally found Song Yin in Liucheng, and Xie Yuan was not by her side.

Xie Huaisheng was only sober at that time, he indirectly lost his son.

It was also at this time that Mr. Xie found out that Xie Yuan was missing, and the Huanyu Group started looking for someone everywhere.But it was Mr. Xie who was doing his best, looking for Xie Yuan with all his heart.

Xie Huaisheng didn't want to look for him anymore, he always felt that he had completely lost that son back then.What he got back was the proof that he was abandoned by Song Yin.

He hated Song Yin, and even hated the child Song Yin left in Liucheng.

Once such things as feelings are deliberately avoided for a long time, they will really disappear.

Many years have passed, and most of Xie Huaisheng's emotions have disappeared along with Song Yin, including when Xie Yuan stood in front of him many years later, he has no emotions.

Xie Huaisheng told Xie Yuan about his relationship with Song Yin back then. He hadn't talked so much for many years, and finally he picked up hot tea to moisten his throat.

Xie Yuan listened calmly. It's not that he didn't think about the complicated past between them, but after listening to it, he actually felt relieved.

He became a sacrifice of his parents' love, how sad and innocent.

Xie Huaisheng finally took a post-it note from the drawer and handed it to Xie. He said, "This is your mother's address in Liucheng. You can decide for yourself."

Xie Yuan took it, and only one address was written on the sticky note: No. 131, Min'an Road, Old Town, Liucheng.

When Xie Yuan was about to open the door to leave, Xie Huaisheng said, "We are all the same, you and I are so similar."

The same lack of emotion, the same coldness.

"We are different."

Xie Yuan closed the door.He is different from him, and will never be the same. Xie Huaisheng doesn't know how to love and doesn't know how to love. He has been selfish and indifferent all his life, but he doesn't.

The person he loves deeply, he is willing to give everything to protect him.

When Xie Yuan went downstairs, he looked at Zhou Wan and said, "Aunt Zhou, I still think you are rather pathetic. After living your whole life, you have turned yourself into a shadow, a transparent person."

Zhou Wan was trembling with anger, but she opened her mouth and couldn't speak.

Xie Yuan left Nanshan Yun District, he was not as calm as he appeared on the surface, the sadness permeating from his bones was about to overwhelm him, he wanted to embrace his own antidote.

He found Jiang Xun in the rental house.Jiang Xun had just finished his afternoon nap, and woke up sleepily to open the door for him, and when he opened the door, he was hugged.

"Jiang Xun, I'm a little sad, what should I do?"

Jiang Xun was a little dazed, and subconsciously put his arms around Xie Yuan's back.

He thought about it seriously, and said softly, "Then...hug, okay?"

"Well, hug," Xie Yuan hugged him even tighter, his voice a little low.

Jiang Xun let him hug him for a long time, until his legs were numb from standing.After a long time, he heard Xie Yuan say: "Jiang Xun, let's go back to Liucheng, shall we?"

"Okay," Jiang Xun said.

In the summer vacation of [-], Xie Yuan and Jiang Xun returned to Liucheng.

Seeing Uncle Zhang again, Jiang Xun felt very cordial. When he returned to the Angel Orphanage, he found that the orphanage had undergone great changes, and the decoration and equipment were much better.

Xie Yuan asked Uncle Zhang about the address. Uncle Zhang looked at the post-it and thought for a long time before saying, "I remember that there is no number 131 over there. If it is number 131, go to the side of the mountain."

Xie Yuan and Jiang Xun took a taxi there.

The old town of Liucheng is the site of the city before liberation. I heard that there are many ancient relics, which have been applied for national intangible cultural heritage.The urban area over there has been turned into a tourist industry by the city, but the economy has been in recession in recent years, and no one knows about it.

Xie Yuan and Jiang Xun were considered to have grown up in Liucheng, but neither of them had been to the old town of Liucheng.This area, past the Huancheng Road, is an antique building.

Min'an Road is on the north side of the old city. The terrain is high. There are no residents on both sides. The scattered buildings are all teahouses.When we reached the middle section of the road, we had already started walking towards the mountainside.

Sure enough, as Uncle Zhang said, Min'an Road only reaches No. 130, and if you walk up, you haven't seen any buildings for a long time.Xie Yuan felt a little heavy in his heart, even a little flustered.

He was afraid that he would not find it, and he was also afraid that he would find it.

Finally, after walking for more than half an hour, there was a nunnery at the end of the cobblestone road.

The vermilion gate is wide open, and you can see the large incense burner in the middle of the courtyard from the gate.Stepping on the stone steps, you can see the inner temple of the nunnery and the trees on both sides.

It turned out that this is No. 131, Min'an Road.