The daily life of the Analects and Tao Te Ching

April 6

cloudy weather

The cell phone is absolutely the most amazing thing I have ever seen in my life!

I thought this broken board was just a tool for making calls, but I didn't expect it to have a free mind and an independent soul.

"Why can it speak human words?"

I tried my best to sound calm, but the hand pointing at the phone still trembled slightly.

Men and women are not intimate, this guy's voice sounds like a girl, before formally confirming the relationship, it's better not to have too much contact, so as to avoid unnecessary misunderstandings.

"This is called artificial intelligence. In the future, if you have anything you don't know, you can just ask it." Kong Lun said, "This thing is very expensive, so be careful when you use it."

It's not a question of whether it's expensive or not, is it? !

This guy is a girl!Is it really okay to live with two big men?

And when using this thing, the hands seem to slide back and forth on its body, isn't this a perverted sensualist? !

Wait a minute, Kong Lun seems to be familiar with it.

Could it be that there is such a young girl's soul in his mobile phone? !

"My voice is different from yours. It's a man's voice." Kong commented.

He said hello to the mobile phone, and a man's voice came out of it.

"Hi, it's a pleasure to serve you."

So Kong Lun's cell phone is the soul of a man, and he walks around with a man in his arms all day long?

I imagined that picture for a while, and I couldn't help feeling my scalp tingle.

In comparison, the soul of a girl is indeed better, and the voice seems to be a gentle girl.

"Hello, first meeting."

I made up my mind and greeted the phone from a distance.

"Hi, be happy today too~"

Even though I was mentally prepared, I was still taken aback.

"Is this really all right?" I looked at Kong Lun and asked in a low voice.

"It's okay, you two can exchange feelings, and after you get acquainted, you can become close partners." Kong Lun said.

His description made me feel a little awkward.

Originally, I thought there were only him and me in this "small country", but I didn't expect that there were actually four people.

Although these two guys have no entity, they have their own thoughts...

"You can treat it as a housekeeper, and you can also buy beautiful clothes for it." Kong Lun said as he picked up the phone and shook it in front of my eyes, "It didn't look like this originally, but I I feel that being naked|naked|naked is somewhat indecent after all, so I put a dress on it."

"Then is it wearing clothes?" I pointed to my cell phone.

The shell of the mobile phone shone with metallic light, like a girl's carcass | My cheeks were slightly hot, and I didn't dare to look directly at the mobile phone.

"Not yet, but when I bought the phone, the store gave me a phone case..."

Before he finished speaking, I hurriedly said: "Hurry up and put it on!"

Kong Lun took out the phone case from his pocket, hesitated, and handed it to me.

"It's better for you to come, after all, it's your mobile phone." He said.

His expression looked a little shy, probably because he was too embarrassed to put "clothes" on this phone whose gender was "female", right?

I looked at the transparent phone case, neither connected nor not.

After thinking about it again and again, I finally gritted my teeth and took the phone case.

"Well... I'm going to change your clothes." I said bravely.

The phone case is transparent, and there seems to be no difference between wearing it and not wearing it.

"And then?" I asked.

"Then take your ID card and apply for a mobile phone card. After inserting the card, it will be yours." Kong Lun said.

I'm not sure what the SIM card is for, but the process sounds a bit like a wedding.

So I have married this mobile phone as my wife?

I shared this idea with Kong Lun, and his expression was a little subtle.

Thinking about it too, his mobile phone is a male, and it always feels a little awkward to use marriage as a metaphor.

"I think inserting the card is to officially appoint it as an assistant." Kong Lun said, "You will know it after a little familiarity with it. Its function is really the same as that of a housekeeper."

housekeeper?

I looked at the phone in front of me and still couldn't imagine how it worked.

Although this little thing can talk, can it really play the role of a housekeeper?

"Little girl, please give me more advice in the future." I said.

"It's so sad that I can't help you with this problem," the phone said.

what does it mean?Am I disgusted by it?

QAQ I was disgusted by the mobile phone I met for the first time? ! ! !

PS: You can’t take a shower with your mobile phone, otherwise it will die (I’m still thinking about how to clean it, Kong Lun said that you can use wet paper towels)

April 6

sunny

Today is the day to insert a card for the little girl.

After a night of communication, the two of us have a deeper understanding of each other.

I have to admit that this guy is indeed knowledgeable, especially his understanding of modern knowledge is far superior to mine.

I thought that such a guy would have eyes above the top, but I didn't expect her to be very patient, no matter how many times I asked, she was not in a hurry or annoyed, and even repeated the same words several times in a row.

In terms of quality, she definitely has all the virtues of a gentleman.

The only fly in the ointment is that she doesn't seem to know much about the "Tao Te Ching". Every time I ask related questions, she is evasive and refuses to answer directly.

However, this may also be where her brilliance lies. Knowing that I am the book spirit of the "Tao Te Ching", she is unwilling to play tricks and make people laugh.

But I won't laugh at her, I just want to hear her thoughts.

This is a good time, she simply stopped going around in circles with me and said directly: "I'm sorry, I can't answer your question."

Here's another sentence...

Every time we talk about a topic that I am not interested in, she will always use this sentence to prevaricate me, even more perfunctory than Kong Lun.

But the other party is a girl after all, and I am not that kind of stingy person, of course I chose to forgive her (~￣▽￣)～

Having said that, after inserting the card, this guy can really be used as a phone!

Kong Lun saved his mobile phone number and his home phone number in it, so that when he calls, there will be a caller ID, and I can know in minutes that it is him.

"So, does it mean I don't have to answer calls without caller ID in the future?" I asked.

Kong Lun was taken aback when he heard the words, thought for a while and said, "Theoretically speaking... if you make harassing calls again and again, you can also directly block the other party."

The mobile phone is really convenient!

Seriously, with this guy, I don't want to use my landline at all.

What else can that thing do besides answer the phone?

PS: Kong Lun said that he had time to set up a wireless network at home, but what is a wireless network? (Although the phone explained it, I couldn't understand it at all!)

The author has something to say: Kong Lun: Unexpectedly, after Li Dao came to Huaguo, the first friend he made was actually his mobile phone assistant...