The daily life of the Analects and Tao Te Ching

April 6

sunny

Kong Lun has a good relationship with his neighbor. The other party knew that he had never eaten western food, so he specially gave him two coupons for a western restaurant, asking him to take his girlfriend to experience it when he had time.

This guy doesn't have a girlfriend, so he can only beg me to go with him.

"Let's go together, it seems like fun." Kong Lun said.

I have never eaten so-called Western food before, and I am quite interested in it, so I gladly accepted the invitation.

The moment I said yes, I said nothing and thought this dining trip would turn out to be my nightmare trip.

I just wanted to have a meal. In order not to look too strange, I also specially put on a cultural shirt issued by the neighborhood committee, which definitely conforms to the characteristics of the times.

But they actually said that I was dressed too casually? !

To be honest, my clothes are not casual at all.

Among the many cultural shirts printed with promotional slogans, I chose the one with the most connotation and depth.

"Green water and green mountains are the golden and silver mountains."

These words seem simple, but the more you think about it, the more reasonable it becomes.

Don't they agree with this sentence?

"Sir, I'm sorry, you really can't go in wearing such clothes, no matter what the slogan says." The waiter at the door said.

I looked at Kong Lun, and he obviously didn't expect such a situation to happen, with a confused expression on his face.

"Why don't you wear the clothes inside out? Then the words will be inside." He suggested.

"Please don't make such a joke." The waiter said.

The two of us are clearly discussing the solution seriously, why does he think we are joking?

After going through twists and turns, I finally entered the restaurant. I never thought that after seeing me, those eating guys would cover their mouths and snicker, as if they saw something funny.

I really don't understand what's so funny!

They should look even weirder in comparison, right?

Good Chinese people don't use chopsticks to eat, but wield knives and forks like barbarians.Those who knew they were eating, but those who didn't know thought they were at war.

The food on their table didn't look well cooked either, it seemed that it was served directly on the table as half-finished products, and the meat was still bloodshot, which made people's scalp tingle.

Is this really a place to eat?

We followed the guide to our seats, and just as we sat down, a man dressed in a weird way came over and handed us two booklets full of birdsong.

I opened it and flipped through it, but couldn't understand half a word.

What the hell is this? !

Kong Lun looked at the thing in silence for a moment, took out his phone and poked it, not knowing what he was doing.

I looked around, imitating the way people around me were eating, and picked up the knife and fork on the table to make gestures, but I always felt that something was awkward.

Is it really okay to eat with something this weird?

Just when I was puzzled, Kong Lun looked at the phone and nodded thoughtfully.

"Order." He said, raising his hand.

Seeing my puzzled expression, he confidently stated that he had mastered the routine and there would never be any problems.

The strangely dressed man came over again and asked, "Sir, what can I do for you?"

"Can I have a pair of chopsticks?" I asked.

The man was stunned for a moment, he probably didn't expect that I would make such a request, and said with some embarrassment: "Sorry, we don't provide Chinese tableware here."

A restaurant owner doesn't even have chopsticks, how can he open a restaurant?

I couldn't help but rolled my eyes.

"I want to order." Kong Lun said, relieving the awkward atmosphere.

"Okay, what do you want?" The man took out a small notebook and asked.

"This." Kong Lun pointed to a string of characters on the booklet and said.

"This... is our store name." The man suppressed a smile.

"No, no, I made a mistake." Kong Lun hesitated for a moment, then pointed to another string of characters, "This?"

"This is our address."

The people around started whispering, and Kong Lun looked a little embarrassed.

He improved his memory this time, turned a page backwards, pointed to a string of characters in the middle and said, "This."

"Would you like some music?"

Although he still looked polite on the surface, there was a hint of ridicule in his tone.

your sister!After making a menu that customers can't understand, does he still have a sense of superiority?

"Anything to recommend?" I asked impatiently.

"Today there is a dish recommended by the chef..."

"That's all." I said, "Anyway, there are only two of us, and you can just look at the rest."

I don't know if my words touched some switch inadvertently, but the other party immediately became more respectful and asked, "Okay, we will prepare as soon as possible. Do you have any taboos?"

There's nothing I can't avoid, as long as it's not too much of a hassle to eat.

However, in "The Analects of Confucius", there seems to be a saying "never tire of fine food, never tire of fine meat"...

"Be careful when making it, and be simple when eating it. Don't fool things by serving half-baked things." I said.

The man wrote them down one by one, and then went down to prepare.

Seeing the man walking away, the guest at the next table asked, "What is your occupation?"

"None of your business." I said angrily.

"It feels like your temperament is very similar to that of a critic," the man said.

What is a critic?

I recalled it carefully, and it seems that I have never heard of this "home".

"Not a critic, but a Taoist." I said.

"Taoism? Then are you proficient in divination and divination, and you can turn beans into soldiers?" the man joked.

This is not the first person to have this kind of misunderstanding. Every time I hear similar statements, I feel inexplicably heartbroken.

The "Tao" here refers to the "Tao Te Ching", not Maoshan Taoism...

Kong Lun seemed to be obsessed with the embarrassment just now, and he didn't feel better until the food was served.

"The food is not bad." I said, "But I will definitely not come to this poor place again."

"I wonder if we are really out of touch with the times?" Kong Lun took a bite of the food in front of him and said in a low voice, "Obviously I have worked hard to adapt, but I still have a feeling of being abandoned by the times. "

joke!How could this guy be abandoned by the times?

A few days ago, there were students memorizing "The Analects of Confucius" on the street to prepare for the exam!

In comparison, I think the situation of "Tao Te Ching" is more dangerous.

The author has something to say: Confucianism: It feels like we are two lonely old people who have been abandoned by the times QAQ