ninety-nine twelve

Wu Haoyu laughed suddenly, took a few steps back, distanced himself from me, and murmured: "Forget it, do whatever you want."

I couldn't understand what he meant. The sound of someone going up and down the stairs in the corridor outside the door broke the frozen atmosphere inside the door a little.

When I took a step forward, Wu Haoyu took a step back. When I was in a hurry and approached unconsciously, he backed up again, always keeping a certain distance from me.I called his name, and tentatively took a small step forward, but this time he didn't retreat any more, standing straight on the spot unmoved, I was a little relieved, and slowly moved away from him She approached, opened her arms, and hugged him gently.

I've never seen Wu Haoyu's emotions so outspoken. His words stunned me, like a person who has been restrained all the year round, suddenly showing his violent side, which is surprisingly powerful.

I don't know what to do to appease the person in front of me, but I have a gut feeling that hugging should help.

Those questions and accusations that were pressing on my chest were all forgotten by me. Nothing frightened me more than "Wu Haoyu is pushing me away". Of course, he didn't push me anymore and just let me hug , remained motionless, and I seemed to have stopped thinking, and could do nothing but hold him motionless.

I closed my eyes and rested my chin on his shoulder, tired and lucky as if I had escaped a battle.Fortunately, although he drove me away roughly and kept saying that he didn't like me, what he said last time meant that he still liked me, right...

If you like it, you can like it, as long as he doesn't leave or drive me away, if you like it, you can like it...

Wu Haoyu moved his body suddenly, I was startled, his arms tightened subconsciously, and he also exerted a little force, struggled out of my arms, stretched out his hands to hold my face and looked carefully, there was no brilliance in his eyes.Then he went straight to the kitchen, and I was about to follow, when he suddenly turned around, gave me a blank expressionless glance, raised his head to indicate the direction of my dining table, and finally said again: "Go and sit."

Wu Haoyu was rattling in the kitchen, not knowing what he was doing. When he came out of the kitchen, he was holding something wrapped in a bag in his hand. He came and sat down in front of me. There was a corner of the table between us. Lifting that thing up to my face, the cold touch stimulated my brain, but I didn't avoid it.

The place where the fist hit was poked by the edges and corners of the ice was a little painful, Wu Haoyu asked: "Does it hurt?"

I shook my head.

"Is it cool?"

I shook my head again.

Then he got up and went to the house and took a towel out, wrapped the bag around it, and applied it to my face, his movements were lighter than before.He stared at my cheek, patiently, softly, lifelessly, without speaking or blinking.

He was right, everything has been as I wished, I will no longer be unreasonable, we go back to the time when no one said anything, good friends are good friends, and will always be.If the ice wasn't going to melt, I wish I could just keep going with him like this.

I reached out to caress the back of his neck, leaned forward and lowered my head slightly, and put my mouth on his lips.

If you like it, you will like it...

Wu Haoyu's hand seemed to tremble a bit, but apart from this moment, he didn't react at all. The distance between me and him had never been so close, but I couldn't even feel his breathing, and he maintained it obediently. In the original posture, there was no response at all, and I was allowed to kiss him.

It’s also kissing, but I really don’t know how to kiss a guy. Boys’ lips are not as soft as girls’. When kissing, they can rub the stubble around them. I don’t know if I should stick my mouth on it. There should be further action.

After a stalemate like this for a while, Wu Haoyu still turned his head away, and said flatly: "What are you doing." There was no joy, no tension, no surprise, nothing in the tone.

"I know what I'm doing." Before I kissed him, I thought and struggled for maybe three seconds, and then I stretched out my hand faster than my brain made a decision. I don't know why this kiss was trembling, blunt and abrupt, but the resistance and discomfort I imagined were in The moment I kissed him didn't happen at all, but I felt relieved, and finally felt that he was really still by my side, never gone far.

Wu Haoyu didn't back away, my breath was still on his cheek, I slowly opened my mouth: "Ayu, I don't know, you said you like me, besides being angry, I also feel so scared, you know, I avoid you because I really, really can't accept such feelings, I told you not to like me, you did it, you really don't like me, but I found that I am not happy, I don't know how Do it right, I don't know what I want, I hope we go back to the past, like before, I really care about you, I don't want to make you sad because of this kind of thing, but I can't give you emotionally How do you respond, because I really...Wu Haoyu, can we just do it like this, let's continue like this." After I finished speaking, I leaned forward and wanted to continue kissing him, but he stretched out his hand and pushed me away.

"Tianle, you don't have to do this, you don't have to do these things, you don't have to respond to me, I don't like you anymore, I don't need to like you, just tell me what you want, I'm still your good friend , buddy, nothing has changed."

After Wu Haoyu finished speaking, he was about to stand up, every word he said made me anxious, it wasn't like this, it wasn't what I wanted, and I always did something wrong when facing him.If Wu Haoyu kept avoiding me on purpose, I would know how to deal with it better. The more casual he was, the more I couldn't understand what he was thinking. Now I realize that it's not him who can't go back, it's me, he You're right, I have a knot in my heart, I care too much, I can't get over this hurdle no matter what, and the reason why our relationship has no solution is that I can't go back, and I won't let him go back.

What is the meaning of that kiss just now, I can’t tell, I don’t know what I want to confirm or express through that kiss, I just want to see him, and I want him to look at me, just look at me, I’m making trouble out of no reason However, he yelled and sarcastically attacked him angrily, desperately wanting him to understand me, who I don't understand myself.

I grabbed his arm, and he obediently let me hold it. When I stepped forward to hug him, he stood upright and let me hug him. He didn't move or resist. Except for talking, he was like a puppet.But that's good, at least he's still here, and his friend is me, not someone else.

After a while, Wu Haoyu seemed to be tired from standing, and asked me aloud: "Are you going to stay here tonight?".

I just continued to hold him in silence, without saying a word.

He seemed to sigh softly, "Do you sleep on the bed or on the sofa?"

"No, let's go together."

……

Wu Haoyu was still sleeping on the outside of the bed, his back was facing me, his breathing was as steady as if he didn't exist.

I couldn't sleep, so I turned over and faced the same side as him, staring at his hair in a daze.

It's so strange, why I'm so hesitant when it comes to things related to Wu Haoyu, the bottom line can be lowered, the principle can be lowered, it's too bad to be liked by a good friend, if it were someone else, I would have left I'm far away from him, but I just can't bear to cut Wu Haoyu's mess. After all, compared to him liking me, I don't want him to be disappointed or sad.

Let me reflect again, Wu Haoyu and I were indeed too close, to the point of being ambiguous.He is someone who can rummage through my things at will. I can copy the homework he finished without asking. My phone has his fingerprint to unlock it. When playing, I deliberately put water on him to copy the ball. Drinking the same bottle of water, eating out and playing games, as long as he mentions something, I don't care, and I don't see him being as close as others.

I touched my lips unconsciously. In the past, I would definitely think "I gave him the illusion, I am responsible", but now it is meaningless to think about it. I was even a little lucky. How intimate can be.

Wu Haoyu was much colder than I imagined, I thought he would at least be more active, but every day after that, he was still silent and lazy, not paying attention to everything including me.

But I don't care, because I can feel the subtle changes. He has stopped and is no longer getting further and further away from me. As for returning to the past, it may take a while, but I know what to do.

On Saturday morning, Wu Haoyu asked for leave to go to the hospital to have the stitches removed. I said I skipped class to accompany him, but he said no, I didn't care about him. Anyway, I was just informing him, not discussing with him.

In order to prevent Wu Haoyu from leaving early on Saturday and dumping me, I stayed at his house on Friday night, and he didn't say anything, which was just what I wanted, so I wouldn't have to find a reason to prevaricate him to persuade me to go to class honestly.

On Saturday morning, I woke up early according to the time of my biological clock, woke up Wu Haoyu, packed up and went out.Now it’s the season changing, there are a lot of people with colds and illnesses, and the hospital is crowded with people early in the morning on weekends. The procedures for registering, removing stitches, bandaging and taking medicine are very fast, and most of the time is spent waiting in line. Nothing to do after breakfast.

Wu Haoyu's wound healed well, and finally it was no longer a thick and terrible opening, but the stitched marks and new flesh grew protruding and irregular. I frowned and asked the nurse who removed the stitches: "This will leave scars." ?"

"Of course I will. With such a deep gash, how can you expect no scars?"

I shut my mouth in embarrassment, as if I asked a stupid question, the nurse continued to apply medicine to Wu Haoyu, only he was smiling with his lips curled up.

"Okay, don't get wet for three days, and you can remove the gauze later, don't scratch it, and apply medicine when it itches." After speaking, the nurse patted the back of Wu Haoyu's hand regretfully, and complained: "It's a pity for the handsome guy, Why did such a beautiful hand leave a scar, and when it grows up, come to the beauty department of the hospital for laser treatment."

Wu Haoyu thanked him with a haha, and after going out, I asked him: "Are you doing scar removal?"

"Be a fart, what kind of scar does a big man get rid of?"

I shut my mouth in embarrassment again, and followed him downstairs to the hall to get the medicine.

After leaving the hospital, we took the subway back to school.It's rare that the subway is not crowded at this hour, but there are no seats either. Wu Haoyu and I found a corner and stood. He held on to the railing with his left hand, and his right hand naturally hung by his side.

I leaned against the wall of the car and picked up his right hand to observe.I haven't noticed before, Wu Haoyu's hands are really pretty, the fingers are long and straight, the joints are not big and not deformed, but they look like angular hands, and the nails are neatly trimmed, the only fly in the ointment is the sticker on the tiger's mouth Gauze and tape, and the wound under the gauze, I don't know what kind of scar it will grow into in the future.

I was lost in thought, Wu Haoyu inadvertently withdrew his hand, "Is it a pity?"

"what?"

"Scarring."

"……such a pity."

"What a pity?"

I was speechless, not knowing what Wu Haoyu meant by this.

He went on to say: "What a pity, I have more than one scar on my body."

I was startled and realized what he was talking about. My whole body was as heavy as lead. Wu Haoyu has never been a sharp person, but his sharpness from time to time can always make me speechless.

The train was moving fast, the dark tunnel outside the door glass and the bright lights in the carriage formed a strong contrast, Wu Haoyu's figure was reflected like a mirror, and electronic advertising lights began to flash in the tunnel after a while, and his complete body was no longer on the glass The figure, but his face was mottled, and the train was about to arrive at the station.

Wu Haoyu asked me: "It's almost noon after school, so go directly to dinner?"

I said: "Okay."

We got off the subway in the business district about two stops away from the school, found a restaurant for lunch, and then strolled all the way back to school, calculating the time just in time for the afternoon class.

As I was walking, I suddenly asked, "Do you want milk tea?"

"Why do you suddenly like drinking that stuff?"

I didn't answer, and then asked again: "Do you want to drink?"

"casual."

The milk tea shops near the school are the ones that I go back and forth. I really don’t like drinking, so I have only been there twice in total, one is this time, and the other is the last time.

My purpose is not to drink milk tea at all, I told Wu Haoyu to let him order the same one as his, but mine needs to be served with ice.

He was slapped with iced milk tea once, a person I didn't know was in this shop, and the two of them laughed and went out.I also recalled this incident when he applied ice cubes to my face yesterday, but it’s hard to bring up the scene at that time, and now I’m sitting in this shop with him, only two or three people are empty, no Then there was the overcrowding that day, he was standing next to me, and there were still two drinks, but one was mine and the other was his.

After getting the drink, I took advantage of his not paying attention and went to ice his face, but I held the cup firmly so that I didn't spill it on him.

Wu Haoyu dodged reflexively, and then cursed "crazy".

I silently followed Wu Haoyu out of the shop, I couldn't tell whether I was happy or unhappy.I didn't know that I could be so stingy. I was bored with such a trivial matter for a long time. Now that I did the same thing to him, I didn't feel much pleasure, but felt a little disappointed.

It rained heavily during evening self-study, and it continued until after school. Many students were stranded in the classroom, waiting for the rain to stop or waiting for their families to pick them up.

It was raining heavily, and it seemed that there was no intention of stopping for a while, and Wu Haoyu and I didn't have umbrellas, and neither would anyone come to pick them up.

Wu Haoyu stood under the teaching building and looked outside, and suggested to me: "You wait here, I'll go home and get an umbrella, and I'll be back in 10 minutes."

I rolled my eyes at him, "Don't you think I should stay at your house today?" After that, I took off my coat and put it over our heads, "You protect your hands, I don't care if they get wet."

When we returned to Wu Haoyu's house, he and I were basically soaked except for our heads. He threw me a bath towel, and I urged him to take a bath first.When I came out of the wash, I saw the scene of Wu Haoyu sitting on the sofa in the living room with his upper body topless, dealing with the wound on his hand.

So I blurted out and asked, "Why aren't you wearing any clothes?"

Wu Haoyu was focusing on the wound, he looked up at me strangely when he heard the words, and asked back: "I'm in my own house, what clothes should I wear?"

I coughed dumbly and unnaturally, wiped my head and walked up to him, looked at his hands, and asked, "How is it? Is it miserable?"

Wu Haoyu exhaled a little irritably, "That's it, how miserable it can be." After he finished speaking, he put all the medicine back into the plastic bag, and stood up suddenly to go back to the room. Where to put it, he glanced at me and said, "I'm going to get dressed."

Wu Haoyu was rummaging in front of the closet, his entire back was exposed in front of my eyes.

There was a long, thin scar running down his back, running from his left shoulder to his right waist, where I had done it when I was a kid.

It was still hot when I first came back to school last fall, and after I got acquainted with Wu Haoyu, I ate takeaways and played games at his house shirtless, but now I can’t express how I feel, the last time I saw him without clothes, especially Seeing his back, the breath was stuffed in his chest, unable to spit it out or swallow it.

I approached, wanting to touch the scar again, after thinking about it, I put down my raised hand, and kissed it lightly.

But Wu Haoyu didn't know why, the moment my lips just touched his shoulder, he hid away like an electric shock, turned around and looked at me in shock, and then lowered his eyelids again, not even surprised anymore.

I turned sideways in embarrassment, and asked him bluntly, "Scared you?"

"No."

"I……"

"Go and dry your hair. The hair dryer is plugged in, but I didn't unplug it."

I smiled at Wu Haoyu, nodded, and went to the other side of the room to dry my hair. At the same time, he took out his clothes and put them on. The only sound in the room was the humming of the hair dryer.

I don't understand, since Wu Haoyu likes me, why would he refuse the move just now?In my opinion, not only should he not refuse, but he should also be happy, but his reaction was extremely single, except for a little surprise at the beginning, there was nothing.

But it’s okay, at least I understand that this is the part he doesn’t like, so I don’t have to do it in the future.