I wish it was just for you

After eating, Chen Zixi sat hunched up on the balcony, squinting her eyes to watch the sun rise.Summer is coming to an end, only a little hot tail is dragging, a round of red sun hangs at one end of the sky, and a new day is about to start again.

Parents got up and saw her startled, she turned her head and looked at them, tried to squeeze out a little smile, then turned her head and continued to watch the sun.Dad washed up and went out to work. Before leaving, he winked with his mother, thinking she couldn't see.

After Dad went out, Mom sat down beside her. She let go of her hands clasping her legs, and lay down on her back with her head on her mother's lap. Mom stroked her hair and watched the sun rise with her. Sky.

They sat like this for a long time, until the sun became dazzling and the sky faded to a very light blue, but Chen Zixi still didn't move. Mother Chen looked down at her, feeling sore in her heart .

She knew that this period of time was a very difficult period for her daughter, and the result was too sudden and cruel for her.She has always regarded Xiaoyu as her daughter, and she has been enduring while assisting Xu's mother in dealing with the aftermath. Now only the mother and daughter can remove the pretense and concealment, and reveal their sadness naturally.

--Mother.Chen Zixi spoke.

--Um?

——Peipei is a bad boy, right?

——She is a child who can be pitied even if she is bad.

Their conversation came to an abrupt end here, and no one spoke again.They went back indoors, mother started to make lunch, Chen Zixi went back to the room, and called Xiang Yunyang.

She is ready.

When they returned to L City together, it was almost evening, Xiang Yunyang fetched a car from the airport, and took Chen Zixi to the house where he and Xu Peiyu lived.While Xiang Yunyang was parking in the garage, Chen Zixi went upstairs first, and opened the door with the key Xiang Yunyang gave her.

The decoration in the house is still roughly the same as when she came more than a year ago. She opened the window, and the wind blew in, stirring up the white curtains.There is a wooden chair and table by the window, which did not exist before. The setting sun spills in through the window, like a layer of golden mist.

She walked slowly to Xu Peiyu's room, sat down on the edge of the bed, touched the pillow, and touched the quilt.Opened the cabinet next to the bed, and found a thick diary inside. When I opened it, the font in the first half of the book was still correct, but the writing became more distorted and fragmented, and it was even difficult to put together a sentence. Complete sentences.

She caressed the pages of the book, her fingertips seemed to feel the pain from the distorted font, she just felt the pain, closed the pages and gently rubbed the cover.Hearing someone calling her in a trance, looking up inadvertently through the open door, he saw a halo by the window, a familiar figure sitting in the halo, it was extremely beautiful.

Just when he was about to call out that person's name, his throat was choked up, and he couldn't make any sound, but the tears fell like water that had opened a gate, and couldn't stop falling down.Xiang Yunyang entered the room, followed the crying, and found the little man trembling from crying in Xu Peiyu's room.

He approached, sat on the same level as her, and gently pulled her into his arms. She leaned against his neck, crying like pear blossoms with rain, and he patted her on the back.Seeing that she was a little out of breath from crying, he pushed her away and sat down, and gave the command to exhale. Her breathing gradually became steady, and she wiped the tears on her face with her hands.

He took out a handkerchief from his pocket to wipe her, waited for her to calm down completely, and took her out of Xu Peiyu's room.

They sat down on the chairs in the dining room, took out the green tea they just bought to Yunyang, and handed Chen Zixi a cup, Chen Zixi sipped obediently with red eyes.

Xu Peiyu spent the past half a year with Xiang Yunyang, and he should know best about her.

——About half a year ago, Peiyu started to suffer from insomnia due to work pressure. She couldn't fall asleep all night, so she found me, hoping that I could help her find the crux.In the process of communicating with her, I found that she was very depressed and her thinking reaction became a little slow, so I took her to see Dr. Ouyang, a psychiatrist.

——Dr. Ouyang has deep attainments in psychiatry, and she was the one who diagnosed Peiyu with mild depression.Peiyu doesn't want me to tell anyone, I can only pay more attention to her condition, follow Dr. Ouyang's advice, talk to her more in my spare time, guide her to confide, take her out more to relax, and see a doctor regularly.

——She cooperated with the treatment very well, and her condition was gradually under control. Until more than two months later, I received a call from her, and she told me that she was going back to City X, and she became very depressed again, but I asked She refused to say anything, so I had no choice but to give up.During this period, I called her many times, but she never answered, and only told me when she was about to come back.

——I picked her up at the airport. She lost a lot of weight, but she said she didn't go on a diet, but suffered from insomnia.The next day, I immediately took her to see Dr. Ouyang.The doctor said that she encountered a huge stimulus again, and her condition aggravated a lot.She was more depressed than before, cried often, and couldn't sleep all night.

——She was completely unable to engage in any work, so she resigned from the company and concentrated on recuperating at home.After a short period of time passed peacefully, one morning I got off the night shift and bought her breakfast, but no one answered no matter how hard I knocked on the door, I started calling her name, but there was no sound at all.

——I called someone to unlock the lock, and it took a lot of trouble because I wasn't the owner.The door opened and she was found sitting on the bathroom floor with her wrists cut.I gave her a simple bandage, and then sent her to the hospital, which still saved her life.

After she woke up, she remained silent until evening, when she said dryly, "I want to live."

——She opened her mouth to talk about returning to City X. It was her grandma who passed away. She said that she never thought that human life was so fragile, and birth, old age, sickness and death were too difficult for her to accept.She didn't want to commit suicide, but she just wanted to eat oranges, so she went to the kitchen to get a knife, and when she woke up, she lay on a hospital bed.

——I asked Dr. Ouyang, and she said that a major feature of severe depression is the appearance of suicidal tendencies. Next, in addition to psychological treatment, drug treatment is also needed. After I was discharged from the hospital, I moved with her permission. Come in, although it is not appropriate for a man and a widow to live in the same room, but I am more worried that she will harm herself again.

——Afterwards, her treatment began to show initial results, but news came that her father had been arrested for accepting bribes.She went back to City X again, and Dr. Ouyang transferred Peiyu's treatment there through her old acquaintance at the Central Hospital of City X, and transferred the case and diagnosis and treatment records there.

——But after she went back, the treatment was not systematic. She often couldn't spare time to receive the doctor's diagnosis and treatment, and she couldn't take the medicine on time, and her condition took a turn for the worse.I also went to City X, her father's situation was not optimistic, but no one could help, so I brought her back to City L.

——It was also the opportunity to go to X City this time. I met Chen’s mother for the first time and told Chen’s situation behind Peiyu’s back. After hearing this, Chen’s mother cried and said that Peiyu’s biological mother died of depression of.At that time, you and Peiyu were still very young, and they deliberately concealed the truth, so that you never knew about it.

——After I came back, I told Dr. Ouyang the news. After hearing it, she said that it was no wonder that Xu Peiyu had suicidal tendencies, and that it was endogenous depression.The so-called endogenous depression refers to Peiyu's depression. Apart from acquired stimuli, Peiyu's depression also has a large degree of genetic factors.

——In the end, no matter how hard we tried, her treatment still failed.