When a straight man dresses up as a harem heroine

The great poet Haizi has a poem: I have a house facing the sea, where the spring is warm and the flowers are blooming.

It is a lifetime dream of many people.

Now, I have a Qifeng Palace. Although it is not facing the sea, it is indeed in full bloom in spring.

There are dedicated people to serve, so you don't have to worry about food and clothing.

Sleep until you wake up naturally, without paying the mortgage.

Thinking about this life, isn't it the life that social animals have dreamed of after decades of hard work?

And there are so many beautiful young ladies in the harem, just looking at them is refreshing, isn't it beautiful.

Where in the world can you find such a fairy day!

After leaving the palace, I have to make a living and run a family business. It's so hard.

Besides, the social environment in ancient times was quite dangerous, and the imperial palace was the safest.

Thinking about it, Tan Yan's heart began to waver when he left the palace, if the emperor really didn't touch him.

It would be best to stay in the palace.

Seeing the meaningful smile on the queen, all the beauties brightened their eyes.

Does this mean there is drama?

The sisters have been trained for many years, and they are best at observing words and expressions.

The two of them immediately took off their coats, leaving only their bellybands, and flung themselves into Tan Yan's arms, taking a place at the same time.

Tingyin's slender lotus root arms caressed his chest weakly and bonelessly.

Zhile Ying's lips parted lightly, and said with a breath: "Empress Empress, let my concubine serve you tonight..."

Her last one has a long ending, and her winking eyes are like hooks, making your heart flutter.

Tan Yan's whole body was crisp, and the electric current rushed from the tailbone all the way to the top of the head.

This, this is amazing!

Eat, eat, can't bear, can't bear...

All the beauties were jealous when they saw the opportunity being snatched away by their sisters, and threw them over without any money

Tan Yan was taken aback by their eyes, and quickly waved the two sisters away.

"Okay, okay, stay away from me."

Even if the emperor doesn't touch them, they are still the emperor's women and cannot be touched.

Tingyin said aggrievedly: "Empress, we really want to serve you."

Said and stuck up again.

A beauty next to her sarcastically said, "Didn't you hear that the queen told you to stay away? Let me do it."

Tingyin and Zhile tightly hugged Tan Yan's waist and didn't let go: "Your Majesty is just shy, she will know about my sister's goodness later, she will definitely be inseparable from us."

Another imperial concubine sneered: "Sure enough, it's from a small place. I really have no shame."

Tingyin and Zhile's eyes were red with anger, and they looked at Tan Yan with grievances, counting on him, the empress, to be the master.

It was already embarrassing for Tan Yan to be hugged, and it was the first time he was being scrambled by so many beauties.

Happiness came too suddenly, and I couldn't react at all.

The imperial concubine stroked the hair on her sideburns with her fingers, and said softly: "Your Majesty, my concubine has been proficient in rhythm since childhood, and is good at singing and dancing. I heard that my empress also loves these elegant things, and my concubine is willing to discuss with her until late at night. .”

Next to her, another beauty knelt down, showing off her proud capital coquettishly: "Your Majesty, my concubine is good at holding shoulders and pinching feet, and is proficient in massage techniques. If you think your empress is weak during pregnancy, I can just use my concubine."

"Your Majesty, I have a meteor flying lantern, which is lit at night, and the whole room is like sparks and flying flowers. I think if you see it, you will be in a good mood every day."

"Your Majesty, my concubine..."

"Your Majesty, I'd better listen to my concubine..."

Looking at the noisy scene comparable to the vegetable market, Tan Yan instantly understood one thing.

After seeing his refusal, the group of women thought he was driving up the asking price.

So one by one tried their best to seduce him and get the secret.

For example, the queen is Party A who holds absolute power, and these concubines are Party B who wants to make a profit.

The so-called Party A abused me thousands of times, and I treated Party A like first love.

It's so refreshing to be surrounded and complimented.

In the previous life, as Party B who had been abused all the time, it was really addictive to turn over and enjoy the excitement brought by power.

Looking at the dozen or so beauties who are beautiful and beautiful, they are jealous of him.

Tan Yan felt like an inflated hydrogen balloon, about to float, float...

No wonder everyone wants to be emperor.

Waking up and taking power in the world, lying drunk on the lap of a beauty is simply the most wonderful thing in the world.

However, there are some things that can only be seen from a distance and not played with.

Tan Yan quickly came to his senses and tore the beauty who had transformed into an octopus off his body.

"Ahem... Let's talk about things, don't touch your hands."

The beauties distanced themselves from him unwillingly, but they were all looking for opportunities to take advantage of the loopholes.

Tan Yan remembered a very crucial question.

"Why doesn't the emperor want to touch you?"

All the beauties looked at me and I looked at you, and shook their heads helplessly.

Tan Yan was a little dazed, he glanced at Concubine Yao who had been shrunk beside him, and waved to her:

"Yaoyao, tell me."

Concubine Yao was called by his nickname, and she gave him a disgusted look: "I don't know."

Tan Yan waved away the concubines and beauties who surrounded him, and said to Concubine Yao: "Come and sit beside me."

The little fairy put on a stinky face, with the words "I hate you very much" written all over it.

She regretted it, this woman looked so annoying just now, she was enjoying herself.

Tan Yandao: "Whoever said just now is willing to do anything?"

Concubine Yao bit the corner of her lip, still struggling.

Tan Yan raised his eyebrows and said, "In that case, you should go out first."

When all the beauties saw this, they all looked forward to it.

They have long noticed that the Queen's attitude towards Concubine Yao is very unusual. If there is one less powerful enemy, their hopes will be even greater.

I wish Concubine Yao could be as petty as usual and get out quickly.

Concubine Yao couldn't know what they were thinking, she was angry and anxious.

No, she can't quit!

For the sake of His Majesty, in order to be favored by him, I must endure it.

In the end, he had no choice but to grit his teeth and sit next to Tan Yan.

Tan Yan put one hand on her shoulder, felt her stiffness, and laughed inwardly.

He specifically looked for the little fairy, and his ears were instantly quieter.

I didn't know whose hand was touching just now, and almost touched Da Jinjiang, which scared him to death.

Still the little fairy is the most obedient, not noisy.

Tan Yan picked two more beauties and asked, "Tell me, why doesn't the emperor touch you?"

The two beauties frowned slightly, and said helplessly: "I really don't know, the night I first entered the palace, His Majesty let me sleep in the side room, and asked Eunuch Yingfu to supervise me to do fifty leapfrogs the next morning."

"So is the concubine."

"Me too……"

All the beauties echoed non-stop.

leapfrog?

Thinking of the sequelae caused by Leapfrog, Tan Yan couldn't help but burst out laughing.

It turns out that Chi Yu has always relied on this method to maintain the dignity of men, which is too funny.

All the beauties thought he was laughing at them, and said angrily:

"Why does the Queen have to mock us? Do you look down on the sisters after you are favored by His Majesty?"

"Queen, you are going too far."

Tan Yan quickly stopped laughing, waved his hands and said: "I didn't mean to laugh at you, I was laughing at the emperor, he can't do it himself, but he wants to use this method to toss you to prove himself, it's too inhuman."

Concubine Yao, who was sitting by the side, stopped doing it, and the flames of anger burned in her beautiful eyes.

"You are not allowed to say that, Your Majesty!"

Tan Yan said: "But this is the truth."

Concubine Yao pouted and said loudly: "Your Majesty is the Son of Heaven, how could it not be possible! Empress, what you say is outrageous."

"Oh, concubine Yao, don't be so mean, the servants are all dismissed, so what's the matter with the empress?"

"Yeah, your majesty is long and your majesty is short. Does he favor you?"

"That's right, he's not benevolent, so why should you be obsessed with him? I've advised you and your sisters to have fun in time is the right way."

Tan Yan couldn't stop laughing when he heard it, these concubines are too sincere.

Suddenly, the pair of sisters entangled again, and said in a devilish way: "Yes, Empress Empress, let's have fun in time."

"Why do you two take advantage of the loopholes? You are so cunning, Empress Empress, I will give you a massage."

"Me too, get out of the way, don't get in the way."

Tan Yan quickly pushed away their entangled hands: "Don't, don't be like this, why did the disagreement start again?"

"Queen, don't be reserved, come on, play with your sisters."

"Yes, yes, what does the empress like to play?"

Tan Yan was trembling with fright, why did he suddenly change his style of painting, where did your usual reserved and noble go?

How dare I play with you guys, I'm afraid I'll die if I take off my clothes.

"Hey, you really want to take off my clothes, stop!"

"Ah, the queen's skin is so smooth!"

"Really, it feels so comfortable...slipperier than mine..."

"I want to touch too! I want to touch too!"

"The queen's waist is so thin, even thinner than mine."

"The queen's chest is so flat, it's even flatter than my harem."

"The empress smells so good, what kind of balm is used for this delicate fragrance, it smells so pleasant..."

"Does His Majesty like women with thin waists, flat chests, and delicate body fragrance?"

"Ah? Is that so? My waist can be tightened a little more, but how can I reduce my chest?"

"Hey, I'm so sad. My breasts are the most plump in the harem. What should I do?"

Tan Yan struggled to grab his clothes:

"Hey, stop it!"

"Don't take off my clothes!"

But he was no match for more than a dozen octopuses with two fists, and was quickly stripped of his coat.

Damn it, because he thinks the bellyband looks like a woman, he usually doesn't wear it, and if he picks it up again, he will be a bachelor!

"Did you hear me! Stop it!"

Unfortunately, no one listened to him.

"Oh, the queen didn't wear a bellyband, I didn't expect her to be like this in private~~"

"Hehehe, wouldn't it be more convenient."

Tan Yan was about to collapse, he was wrong, he was really wrong.

This is different from the harmonious and happy harem life I imagined. These women are so crazy.

I'm not a supermarket discount product, what's there to grab!

"What are you doing?!"

With a familiar male voice, the door was pushed open, and bright sunlight poured in, clearly illuminating the chaotic scene in the hall.

All the beauties turned pale with fright, quickly got up from the ground, and bowed tremblingly to the man at the door.

"Concubine, pay respects to Your Majesty..."

The crowd dispersed, and Tan Yan, who had been played with like a rag doll, curled up on the ground, clearly exposed.

The clothes are messy, the bun is loose, and a large area of ​​skin is exposed on the back of the shoulders, as if if you come later, it will be stripped clean.

Chi Yu's usually calm and composed face rarely showed a shocked expression.

Seeing this, all the beauties slipped out of the door one by one like swimming fish, and took advantage of the opportunity to run away before the emperor had time to get angry.

He even closed the door intimately.

Tan Yan grabbed his collar to prevent getting naked, and almost didn't get up.

I don't know what the group of women did, their body hurts so much.

Chi Yu saw bruises and purple patches on his snow-white skin, which were too conspicuous.

Like being abused.

He walked over, took him into his arms, and asked softly, "What happened?"

Tan Yan shook his head in embarrassment, he couldn't tell you that your woman and I were plotting how to fuck you.

"It's just too much fun together, it's nothing."

"It's nothing?!" Chi Yu's slender fingers brushed across the mark on his shoulder, and his anger burned uncontrollably.

"Hiss..." It really hurts, and they hit too hard.

Tan Yan grabbed his wrist: "Don't touch it."

"Put on your clothes first." Chi Yu pulled the collar of his obscene clothes and straightened them for him.

Tan Yan was exhausted, so he leaned in his arms and let him do it.

Chi Yu's eyes fell on his white and tender neck, and a few strands of black hair mischievously got into the collar, concealing a lavender trace faintly.

Much like some kind of afterthought imprint.

He couldn't help but put his thumb over it, stroking lightly around the mark.

Tan Yan was itchy when he touched him, and said with a smile: "Don't rub it, it's fine."

With a messy bun on his head, he rubbed against his arms, his voice panting slightly, as if the time had suddenly turned to a certain moment in the middle of the night.

Chi Yu pressed his palm on the back of his neck, the palm was so hot that his skin was numb.

Tan Yan tilted his head, trying to avoid it.

Chi Yu was on top of his head, and said in a hoarse voice: "Where did the queen's bellyband go, why didn't I see it?"

Tan Yan's neck froze instantly.

"Find it quickly, I will put it on for you."

The author has something to say: Tan Yan: Here I come, the beauties of the harem!

Beauties: Come on, Lily.

Tan Yan: ...Sorry to bother you.