To my dear Mr. Meng

The new job is to do sales in a joint venture company.The department is full of top-notch people. They can roll up their sleeves and fight for customers and contracts. They communicate in private and advance and retreat properly. They never make people feel uncomfortable. I quickly became friends with them.

I have been really busy for a while, and I didn't bother to contact Meng Qiansheng.On the way home from work that day, it suddenly occurred to him that he should be back from a business trip. When he got home, he saw that he was indeed back, busy in the kitchen.

I can't even remember the last time he was in the kitchen cooking.

When he heard the noise, he turned to see me and said, "It will take a while before we can eat. I brought you some snacks. If you are hungry, eat first."

He seems to be in a good mood today, and I followed Yunkai Yuji, couldn't help laughing and said: "Are you tired? Let me help you."

He also smiled: "It's okay, just steam a fish."

I went back to the bedroom to change clothes. His laptop, various materials, and a bag were on the table.I was really hungry, and I was about to grab a snack. I opened the bag, only to find that there was no food in it, but a bottle of men's perfume.

The perfume is a very small salon brand, not the one that Meng Qiansheng usually uses.I went back to the dining room, only to find that the snacks were on the dining table. After washing my hands, I took a piece. Meng Qian brought out the fish in a low voice, and I asked, "Have you changed your perfume?"

He looked puzzled.I explained: "I saw the bag on your table, I just thought it was for food."

He reacted, and said while setting the bowls and chopsticks: "It was a gift from a colleague."

"Oh."

I picked up the turbot on the plate with my chopsticks and didn't bother to talk anymore.

At night, Meng Qian was sitting in the living room typing on his laptop. When I turned on the TV, his phone vibrated. Before I could turn down the volume, he had already walked to the balcony with the phone.

Occasionally when I am not busy at work, I can still get together with my colleagues to brag and fart; when I am busy, I dare not blink my eyes, and when I get home, I don’t even want to say a word.Meng Qiansheng started looking at houses and cars recently, and asked me for my opinion. I was so tired that my eyelids were so heavy that I could only open them a little, resting my chin on the armrest of the sofa, and slurred in his direction: "Just look at what suits you."

He pursed his lips and looked at me for a long time, and then stopped mentioning it to me.

I knew he was angry, but I was too lazy to coax him, so I pretended to be confused and pretended not to see it.

An order was finalized, and I was finally free for two days.Coming out of the shower, Meng Qiansheng was on the phone on the balcony. When I went back to the room, I saw the floor plan of the real estate scattered on the bed. I picked up a research piece and wanted to wait for Meng Qiansheng to come back to ask his opinion.As a result, I waited and waited, but I didn't see him coming in. After I yawned, he finally walked into the room with his mobile phone.

"Who have you been on the phone with for so long?" I asked.

"Colleague. What's the matter?" Obviously, he was still angry at my perfunctory a few days ago, and his tone was not very good.

Being stabbed by him, I was also a little annoyed, I couldn't hold back for a while, and sneered: "Which colleague, male or female?"

This is the first time I have questioned him in this tone.

Because I hate my mother's desire to control like a prisoner, whenever someone reveals my privacy and tries to invade my personal space, I will be furious; Meng Qiansheng is also like this, so we have always lived in peace.I knew his weakness was here, so I picked it here and crushed hard on his sore feet.

Meng Qiansheng's face turned cold, he packed the things on the bed without saying a word, picked up the computer and went to the next door.

One day, my colleague gave me two movie tickets to watch with my girlfriend. I laughed and said, "Where did you get your girlfriend from?"

As soon as he finished speaking, Xi Fang who was diagonally opposite cast a glance at me.Tian Tian raised her hand and shouted, "I'll be your girlfriend!"

There was laughter in the office.

Movie ticket is a popular love movie nowadays, I am not interested, but this is a good reason to bow your head and make peace with Meng Qiansheng.During the lunch break, I called Meng Qiansheng and told him about the movie tickets. He readily agreed. Although his attitude was not warm, he was not as cold as I thought. He said that he had something to do now, so we hung up the phone.

When I got back to the office, the ones who went out to eat hot pot hadn’t come back yet. It was empty. I had just sat down and put a cup of coffee in front of me.

"Thank you Brother Fang." I said, avoiding his gaze.

Xi Fang is also gay.

I knew it the first time I saw him, even though I didn't ask.

At first, I didn't believe this kind of saying that I could see it at a glance, but when I saw Xi Fang, this feeling came to me spontaneously.I can't tell, he dresses and looks normal and behaves normally, but I have the feeling.

Xi Fang's pair of red phoenix eyes are extremely sharp, as if he wants to peel off a layer of human skin.Apart from the manager in the sales department, he belongs to him, but the manager is turning [-], and he is just [-].Everyone said that he had become a genius, with a terrifyingly wide network of contacts, and there was no client he couldn't keep.

I don’t know if it’s because I’m too suspicious, but I always feel that the way he looks at me has some meaning—when I see through him, he must also see through me at the same time.So I always avoid him intentionally or unintentionally, the relationship between us is neither salty nor weak.

But he didn't intend to leave, he leaned on the glass panel between my cubicle, seemed interested: "I don't have a girlfriend, do you have any other friends?"

"What?" I pretended not to understand.

His eyes fell on my left hand, and I lowered my head along the way, just in time to see the ring on my middle finger.

"Are you free tonight? Treat yourself to dinner."

"I'm unlucky tonight, I have something to do. Another day, I'll let you go."

He nodded: "OK, then I'll wait."

The laughter of colleagues came from far to near. He put his hands in his pockets and walked back to his seat leisurely. I secretly breathed a sigh of relief.

Seeing clients in the afternoon, the dinner appointment was temporarily postponed, Xi Fang said to invite everyone to have afternoon tea, a few girls clamored to go to Zhongtai Plaza to eat, a group of people went there in a noisy manner, and played until after five o'clock, Xi Fang joked and drove people to eat, and then they dispersed.Meng Qiansheng's company is on the other side of Zhongtai Plaza. I simply went to find him. Halfway there, the sky turned cloudy, and it started to rain after a while. I took refuge in a cafe, which was just across from his company.

The freshly ground coffee was waiting anxiously, and it was easy to get it. When I turned my head, I saw people coming out of the building one after another. It seemed that it was time to get off work.I pushed open the door and walked under the canopy that covered the outdoor booth, remembering that I hadn't told Meng Qian that I was waiting for him here.He took out his mobile phone, and saw him talking and laughing with a woman.Walking to the entrance of the building, Meng Qiansheng stopped to open the umbrella, and the woman naturally took his arm, slid under the umbrella lightly, and leaned side by side.

There was only a narrow street between us, and we were diagonally opposite. They walked to the side of the road, as if they were going to take a taxi.It was difficult to wait for a taxi on a rainy day. They stood under the umbrella and talked. The woman was very beautiful, and she smiled gently, as if she was asking something. Meng Qian shook her head repeatedly, and couldn't help laughing at the end. nod.

The rain suddenly turned urgent, everything became more hazy, and their faces could not be seen clearly, blurred into two delicate shadows, like a flower with two stalks.

Meng Qiansheng really looks good when she smiles, I think.Others can make him laugh so happily, but I haven't spoken to him for a week.

How did I push the good-natured Meng Qiansheng to this point?

Ten minutes later, an empty taxi finally came. Meng Qian waved to stop it, opened the door, and the woman bent down and sat in.Meng Qian lowered his body in a low voice, as if saying goodbye to her. It took a while to close the car door, and the car drove into the gray rain.

Seeing him walking in the direction of my company, I went back to the cafe and called and said that I was waiting for him in the cafe.After I hung up the phone, a cluster of anger suddenly burst into my heart, I crumpled up the movie ticket in my pocket and threw it into the trash can.

I stared blankly at him and walked up to him. He asked, "Why are you here? Did you get caught in the rain?"

I didn't want to speak, but forced myself to open my mouth and said no.He glanced at his watch: "What do you want to eat? Go to eat near the cinema or do you want to eat something else?"

I said flatly, "I lost my movie ticket."

He stopped and looked at me, as if considering the truth of what he said.After a while, he said, "It doesn't matter, we can just buy the tickets ourselves."

"Forget it. That movie wasn't interesting at all. Go back." I looked out the window, the rainwater was streaming down the glass, turning into small silver drops, which were dyed brutal bright red by the lights of the car in a blink of an eye.

In the next few days, I paid a little attention and found that Meng Qiansheng's phone calls were a bit too frequent recently.It was basically the same woman who called Meng Qiansheng at night, Fang Wenqian.

I wasn't bored enough to spy on his cell phone—something my mother loved to do I always hated—because he often left the phone on the coffee table, and whenever there was an incoming call, his name would be displayed boldly on the screen.

Intuition reminds me of the woman I saw on a rainy day.

I feel that I am supercilious, but recently I have been having vivid nightmares at night, and I can't get rid of the dark brick red dress. When I wake up in the daytime and see Meng Qiansheng, I feel that there is a hesitation in the corners of his brows and eyes. more distraught.The aching head seemed to be immersed in a boiling oil pan, and every word Meng Qiansheng said seemed to have a deep meaning, like a needle piercing my finger, I had to use all my strength to resist the urge to scold him Rows of bloodstains in my palm.

As long as the force is not enough, the lips and tongue will escape my control, and the brain will release all the sharp and vicious words it can think of, tormenting Meng Qiansheng to his heart's content, which makes him unbearable, furious, and finally slams the door and leaves.

I hate my crazy brain so much.

But when I am in pain, I can occasionally taste a bit of bitter pleasure from it.Sometimes I really want to push Meng Qiansheng to a dead end, let him fight like me, wagging his tail to survive.

However, when the hot blood in my body cooled down, the voices in my head subsided, and I was often frightened by those thoughts and sweated coldly. I was too frightened to stay in the room alone, so I immediately knocked on Meng Qiansheng's door and hugged me. He begged him to forgive me, but in the end he forced his frown to comfort me, and then he gradually calmed down.There were a few times when we quarreled too fiercely, and I apologized afterwards, and I couldn't help crying in front of him until I couldn't breathe.

Meng Qiansheng wiped my face with a tissue, hugged me silently, and finally said very tiredly: "He Badger, stop arguing. Let's stop arguing, okay?"

I was so distressed that I rubbed my forehead against his forehead, kissed his eyelids, and promised not to quarrel anymore.

But the next time it will still turn upside down.

We also had times when we were just as good as ever.

Occasionally I'm not so hysterical, and seeing Meng Qiansheng is as amiable as before, I feel that he loves me more than anyone in the world, and I wish I could stick together 24 hours a day.As long as he was home, I could cling to him like a sloth, talking to him endlessly, telling him everything that was on my mind in detail, and my mouth was dry.He kept saying that I was talking too fast, let me slow down, and when the cup was handed to me, I didn't bother to drink it, and when my mind went blank, I still couldn't stop.

Meng Qian just laughed, saying what's wrong with you, so excited.

I said, I think I love you to death.

He smiled so that his eyes were bright, like stones washed by spring water, and said, I think you are acting stupid again, and started talking nonsense.

I pushed him down on the couch and said "really" and kissed him until he was hard, and we hung out in the living room.This kind of good mood day is quite rare, often two or three o'clock in the middle of the night before I lie in bed, Meng Qiansheng wakes up and catches me, and I will burrow into his bed and pester me to do it.Most of the time, he has to toss three or four times a day, making it impossible for him to go out.

The spring is pleasant in March, and I am in a good mood these two days, everything is going smoothly, I don’t want to go to work, so I took two days off as an excuse, and went to the suburbs of the city alone by car.As soon as I got home, someone knocked on the door, wearing an EMS uniform, saying that there was a courier from Meng Qiansheng.

Meng Qiansheng is still on a business trip and just came back tonight. I signed for him and put it on the coffee table.He played two games absent-mindedly, and then his gaze fell on the package again and again.I picked up the package, and there was a list on it. The handwriting on the carbon paper was not very clear, but it was still recognizable. It was very elegant, and most of it came from a woman. The sender’s handwriting was even lighter. After careful identification for a long time, I found that it was "Fang Wenqian".

As soon as I opened the package, I regretted it. I knew Meng Qiansheng would be angry.But this thought only appeared for a moment, before it was overshadowed by the sinister eagerness to try.

I'm going to see him pissed off.

Fang Wenqian sent a bottle of wine.I don’t have much research on red wine. I usually drink spirits a lot, so I searched online on a whim. It seems that this wine has a good reputation and a medium price, but there are few domestic dealers, so it’s hard to buy.

Meng Qiansheng must have asked her to send it home.I angrily thought, Meng Qiansheng was trying to make me look good.

The more I thought about it, the more irritable I was, and I was circling around anxiously at home, feeling depressed and wanting to throw something. I gritted my teeth for a long time and finally held it back. I immediately took the keys and went out, took a taxi and went straight to the city center.

In the evening, Meng Qiansheng called to ask where it was. I was sitting at the bar and betting with a girl I knew for 5 minutes.

She said she could drink five glasses and still not get drunk. I didn't believe it, so she made a bet with me, saying that if she didn't get drunk after five glasses, I would go with her tonight.I asked what if you were drunk?She said she was at my disposal.I said no, it was you who took advantage anyway.Finally she said I could pick a bottle of wine at the bar and she paid the bill.

After drinking the fourth cup, Meng Qiansheng called.I said I wanted to leave, but she clung to my collar, kissed and touched me for a long time, which made me full of fragrance, and then took my mobile phone to call her herself, saved the number, and then reluctantly said Let people go.

As soon as I entered the door, Meng Qiansheng frowned: "Are you drinking again?"

I nodded, and as I spoke, I embraced him for a kiss.He avoided it calmly, but he still didn't dodge, so he let me nibble on his neck, pushed him away after a while, and let me take a bath.I took off my clothes on the sofa, and he shook them off and picked them up in his arms.

After I finished washing, he stood by the washing machine holding my shirt and asked me, "Did you go with your colleague?"

I said yes.

He raised his eyes and glanced at me, and after a while he responded, unbuttoned all the buttons, put them into the laundry basket, and went out.

He seemed a little unhappy, but I couldn't figure it out. I followed him and sat down on the sofa in the living room, asking, "Why are you unhappy?"

He pursed his lips in silence for a long time, I thought he was going to pretend to be deaf again, but he suddenly said: "You don't go out to drink anymore, it's a mess."

I don't understand why he has to add "mess" at the end, as if I was looking for food in the garbage dump.Suppressing my anger, I caught a glimpse of the bottle of red wine on the coffee table from the corner of my eye, and suddenly sneered: "That's no way, I don't have anyone to come to the door of my house, and I'm rushing to deliver it."

He also turned cold: "What's wrong with you?"

"I'm sick? This Fang Wenqian is your colleague, isn't she calling you every other day? I think she gave you the perfume last time, but this time I gave you wine, so I'm almost here to accompany you!"

"He Yujun, don't speak so harshly."

"You forced me. Meng Qiansheng, what do you want to do? Do you want to break up? If you want to break up, just say it, don't f**king fight me here!" I stood up suddenly, "You want to step on two boats, okay , then don’t let me know. Even if you sleep with all the men and women outside, I won’t frown, and I’m still willing to guard you. But don’t fuck your face, the wine will be delivered to the door Now, what does this mean? Happy newlyweds? Do you want me to toast you two?"

Meng Qiansheng also stood up all of a sudden, his eyes were as cold as a knife: "Every time you get angry, you are so disrespectful. Do you think I don't care? You also understand that I can scold you and do whatever you want. That's because I like you, and I am willing to let you go! Don't always use these words to stab me, I don't owe you, so I should let you go, people have limits, don't go too far. "

"Did I say something wrong? Which sentence is wrong?" I walked up to him, "Did Fang Wenqian give the wine, does she like you and is chasing you? There is nothing between you? Then tell me yourself Ah, you and Fang Wenqian are innocent, nothing happened."

He pursed his lips coldly and did not speak.

I stood still in front of him and looked straight into his eyes: "Meng Qiansheng, I am a spineless and unpursuing person, but you should treat me as a human being. I don't care if you sleep with others, I don't follow you, I don't test you , This is my own choice. I think loyalty is voluntary. Relationships are not about business. If I vote for one point, you must return one point for me. But it does not mean that I am inferior to others. You are good to her, don’t be good Come to me and ask me to greet people with a smile, I am a selfish person, and I will feel uncomfortable."

After venting this, I began to tremble uncontrollably, and my brain was dizzy like lack of oxygen. I quickly pushed him away and sat on the sofa to avoid falling over.There was the sound of him opening the door and going out, I didn't have time to look at it, the things in front of me were all layers of double images.

At night I tossed and turned and couldn't fall asleep, all kinds of thoughts were running wildly in my head, and I was still awake after three o'clock, until I barely fell asleep, and I didn't hear Meng Qian's voice coming back from the door.

During Labor Day, Meng Qiansheng bought a Volkswagen.

On the day I bought the car, I was uncomfortable with lying, so I didn't go, and he didn't force it.The fight more than a month ago seemed to have completely collapsed, and our subsequent communication was limited to daily life, like two shared roommates who couldn't talk together.Meng Qiansheng used the excuse that working overtime at night would affect my rest, and remade the bed in the side room next door that had been vacant for a long time. When we sat in the living room, we each occupied one end of the sofa.

After the quarrel that day, I started to feel uncomfortable again, but the department was busy, so I couldn't take a long vacation, so I had to bite the bullet and go to work. I couldn't breathe in the subway several times, and I felt that I had gone out of my body.

By the end of this week, the spirit finally recovered slowly, and the project that had been talked about for a long time was finally settled, and everyone was moved and thankful.The manager raised his eyebrows, waved his big hand and said that he would treat the guests, and led several cars straight to the Yinting Clubhouse in Zhongtai Plaza.

After dinner, some people left first, and those who stayed here were all old fritters who loved nightclubs without exception.The manager opened a KTV private room and recruited two girls to accompany him to drink. A few people went with him, and the remaining seven or eight were on the dance floor and bar downstairs.

A table full of foreign wine was opened, and I was more excited than anyone else. I made a round of toasts, smoked in one hand and wine in the other, and talked endlessly, making everyone laugh. I was dizzy from lack of oxygen and refused to stop.The tip was one hundred and one hundred, and the girl who accompanied the wine was full of aroma. She gave a sip to the left and gave a glass to the right. I have never drank so much. I really vomited and almost fell into the toilet.After two rounds of vomiting, I took another nap on the sofa. When I woke up, the table was messed up and everyone was gone. There was only one seat left to smoke.

Seeing me open my eyes, he flicked the cigarette ash and said with a smile, "I dare to sleep in a place full of people, so hurry up and check if the wallet is still there."

I subconsciously reached out to touch it and said, "It's still there."

He seemed to have heard some great joke, and his eyes narrowed from laughter.I don't know if it's because I'm half drunk and half awake, and Xi Fang in my sight is much more pleasing to the eye than usual.In addition, he also drank a lot, his eyes became a little looser, and looked less sharp, refined and amiable.

He put the cigarette on the ashtray, his fingers were thin and long, like a woman.

——I don’t know how it feels to hold it.

I feel that the air is getting hot and stuffy, as if someone has sprinkled a handful of worms in the air.

He asked with a half-smile, "Why are you staring at me?"

"I'm going to the bathroom." I answered irrelevantly, stood up staggeringly, dizzy, he helped me, then stood up, and said, "Slow down, I'll take you there."

His hand grabbed my arm, and I looked down. Under the light, the hand turned green and purple, blue and red. It was obviously a hot color, but it was cold when it shone on it.

I touched his hand and it was really cold.

My ears were filled with the sound of rumbling music, and a sudden laugh burst into my ears, and my hair was blown as if nothing, and the next second his body was on top, half-supporting and half-embracing the floor frame Follow me into the bathroom.

The restrooms of this kind of high-end club are magnificent, with green plants in the corners, and the fragrance of fresheners in the air. There is no dirt in sight, as if no one has ever used it after it has been repaired.In the bar and on the dance floor, people are sweating, but here it is deserted and eerily quiet.

"Thank you Brother Fang."

I let him go and went to the sink to wash my hands.The hair of the person in the mirror was messy, the eyelids were extremely red, and the eye circles were also scarlet, as if he had just eaten someone.

Xi Fang's figure also appeared inside, saying, "You seem to be in a bad mood recently."

"No."

He smiled very gently: "Do you think I don't even have the ability to perceive words and emotions?"

I also smiled: "I'm worried about how to make a lot of money."

"You'll be rich by the time you're 30."

"Are you so sure?"

"Because you're smart."

"I am not smart."

"The smarter a person is, the more he thinks he is ignorant."

Our eyes met in the mirror.

I pushed him into the compartment, and his hand reached behind my back, stroking the back of my neck with his fingertips, his lips pressed against it, and there was still a sporadic smell of tobacco in his mouth.I touched his belt buckle, he gasped lightly, and kissed down his neck, I took the opportunity to grab his hair: "I don't wear a condom."

He stopped, looked up at me, laughed lowly, took out an unopened case from his wallet, and untied my belt.

A place on the waist was numb and itchy, and I wanted to stretch out my hand to scratch it, but my arm was so numb that I couldn't lift it.I had to open my eyes, and my consciousness came back in a daze, only then did I realize that the phone in my pocket was vibrating.I struggled to pull out my arms, and sat up with dizzy eyes and a splitting headache.

I was sleeping on the leather sofa, with Xi Fang lying on the sofa next to me, and on the other side of the bed, the manager and a girl who accompanied the wine yesterday were lying peacefully.The curtains were mostly drawn, and the sky outside was already bright. When I looked at the phone, it was almost noon, and there were four missed calls from Meng Qiansheng displayed on the screen.

What happened yesterday rushed into my mind frantically, my heart beat non-stop, my ears were buzzing, and my fingers holding the phone became cold bit by bit, so stiff that I couldn't move.The seat on the sofa moved, and I turned over. My whole body seemed to be electrified, and I jumped up suddenly, opened the door and rushed out.

There was no movement in the corridor. As soon as I dialed the phone, the other end immediately picked it up. Meng Qian asked in a straight voice, "Where are you?"

"……hotel."

"which hotel?"

"Yinting Clubhouse." I stepped into the elevator, trying to smooth out the wrinkles on my suit, "The department drank too much yesterday, so I'll be right back."

Meng Qiansheng asked me to wait at the entrance of the parking lot of Zhongtai Plaza, and hung up the phone directly after speaking.

As soon as I reached the intersection, I saw Meng Qiansheng walking towards me.His face was very ugly, I fiddled with my hair uneasily, followed him half a step into the parking lot.

He slammed the car door, bringing a gust of wind.I was paying attention to his expression, when he suddenly leaned over and pulled the seat belt from behind me, I quickly reached out to pick it up: "I forgot to call you, next time I..." He paused suddenly, Open the collar of my shirt.I looked down, and I could only see a purple-red mark imprinted under the collarbone. It was conceivable what was on the neck.

Meng Qiansheng's face suddenly changed.

It was so quiet in the carriage that a needle could be heard falling.After a long time, there was a crisp "click" sound, and Meng Qiansheng inserted my seat belt buckle into the socket.

Neither of us spoke, and the compartment was as stuffy as if there was no air.

After 5 minutes, he turned off the engine and got out of the car, and walked into a cafe.

My mind was empty, like an empty plastic bag that would deflate if squeezed.I don't want to talk, and I don't want to think about things. The car window was opened a crack, and there was a sharp roar of cars passing by on the road. Every sound was like a whip on my heart, luring me to get out of the car and walk to the middle of the road. Go, and lie down happily under the wheels.

The car door slammed suddenly, and I was startled. Only then did I realize that Meng Qiansheng had returned. He sat back in the car and handed him a paper bag: "Take it."

I took it with both hands, and found that it was a sandwich and hot milk, which felt a little hot through the paper bag.Seeing that I didn't respond, he asked, "Have you eaten?"

"No." I said honestly.

He stopped talking again, took out a cigarette and a lighter from the pocket of his casual suit, put down the car window and lit one.

For some reason today, especially the traffic jam, the traffic police are everywhere, and the road is a mess.I mechanically chewed the sandwich, halfway through the meal, Meng Qian asked in the lingering smoke: "Are you wearing a condom?"

Startled, I looked at his side face.

He reached out the window to shake the ash, turned his face to me, and said calmly, "I'm talking to you."

After another half hour, I swallowed the oatmeal bread with difficulty, and my nose responded.

"……Um."

He nodded, almost imperceptibly.The car in front finally moved, and he stepped on the accelerator.

We ate lunch in a Cantonese restaurant with a booming business. Meng Qiansheng seemed to choose the place with the most people and the noisiest place. Apart from shouting, the other party couldn't hear anything at all, which just covered up our relative silence throughout the whole process, so it wouldn't be too much Awkward.

I stayed at home for the rest of the day, I watched TV in the living room, and he locked himself in the bedroom, not knowing what to do.It started to rain at night, and it was getting heavier and heavier. By the time I went to sleep, there was already a dense sound of rain outside.Meng Qiansheng had already turned off the light, and the door was ajar. I looked at the door and smoked a whole pack of cigarettes, and finally couldn't help it, walked to the door and stood there.

I don't know how long I stood there, suddenly it was bright inside, he turned on the small lamp by the bed, raised his head and looked at me.There was no wave or wave on that face, and I choked my breath in my throat, choking my heart out of shape, and said for a long time: "I'm sorry."

Those two eyelashes rolled up very quickly, and then covered them again: "It's getting late, go to sleep."

Lights went out.

I couldn't understand what he was thinking at all, and I never felt that I was so far away from him, and there were two souls who had never met in a familiar body.

What a ridiculous creature the human being is.They can control the economic ups and downs of half a century, predict the climate change of hundreds of years, and observe the stars of the universe hundreds of millions of miles away, but they don't understand why the lover around them is suddenly silent.

Meng Qiansheng went to work early in the morning, when the door slammed, the alarm clock on my mobile phone hadn't rung yet.In the afternoon, I left work early, and it rained heavily when I got home. Seeing that the car had not left, I sent a text message to pick him up, but he said no, and told me not to wait for him to eat.I didn't have an appetite, so I cooked the pot by myself, and left half of it, I poured it into a plastic bag and threw it out.

After throwing out the garbage and returning, I saw a red car coming from the gate and parked in our building.After a while, a man got out of the car, who looked like Meng Qiansheng.

I didn't go there, I stood in the rain with an umbrella and waited.

The man went upstairs and the car slowly came towards me.The dim light of the street lamps was shining, and the woman in the car was wearing a pea green knitted jacket, with exquisite eyebrows and eyes, and the long earrings protruding from the hair were shining.

The TV was endlessly talking about how various creatures in the ocean prey and reproduce. The screen was colorful, red and blue interlaced, making people dizzy and nauseated. Three words suddenly jumped into my eyes.

I dropped the remote control, picked up the phone, and tapped lightly on the bathroom door.The door was pulled open, and a hot and humid steam hit my face. I handed over the phone: "Your phone."

He had just finished washing, and the water beads from his hair rolled on the towel, like tears.He glanced at me, took the phone, and said thank you.

I wrote an application to the school, and finally got my degree and diploma a year late in early June.It was a sunny day, Meng Qiansheng worked overtime, I went out to eat alone, and wandered around the shopping malls in the city center all afternoon.Tired from walking, I just sat in a daze in a cafe until dusk, and the old Fengxiang opposite was brightly lit, the glass door was pushed open, and a young couple came out from inside. Grab the hand of the man next to you and look at it.When the man said something, she punched him with laughter and anger, then wrapped her arms around his neck, and kissed him on tiptoe.

I touched the ring on my hand.

As night falls, the jewelry and watch windows are even more pearly.I looked from window to window, my eyes were sore from the spotlights, and I still refused to stop.

I'm eager to spend money.

When I stopped, I happened to be standing in front of the window of IWC.I looked at it carefully for a moment, then opened the door and walked in.

When I heard the door lock turn, I immediately sat up straight.Meng Qian came in, and my eyes were stuck on him: "I'm back."

He responded, loosened his tie, and looked at me: "Did you get your degree?"

"got it."

"That's good."

He unbuttoned the first two buttons of his shirt, took off his suit, and noticed my expression: "What's wrong?"

"I bought you something."

Meng Qian stopped: "What?"

I pushed the black watch box to the side of the coffee table: "You try."

He came over and rolled up his sleeves. I saw his eyelashes fluttering quickly, and his eyes fell on my face immediately, without showing any joy.I felt a little nervous for no reason, and my palms were a little sweaty. I observed his every expression carefully, and whispered: "Open it and have a look."

He opened the case and took out the watch.

My heart was pounding, and I desperately needed his compliment: "Do you like it?"

He looked at it carefully for a moment, and then put the watch back as it was. This action was like pouring a basin of snow water on my head.Before he could say anything, he asked first, "How much money do you have in your card?"

"what?"

"How much money do you have left in your card?" He frowned slightly, "How much did you spend?"

I argued, "I get paid every month."

He frowned even tighter, sighed silently, didn't speak, just looked at me.I became angry from embarrassment in this look, and asked, "If you don't like it, I'll just keep it for myself. It's my money that wasted, you can't do that."

"Is this watch [-] or [-]?" He put the box back on the coffee table, sat down on the sofa, and said impatiently, "It's time to save money now, can't watches be a few years later?"

"Didn't I just want to coax you up..." I stopped talking, and a sneer came out of my throat, "I'm sorry, it's my fault."

Meng Qiansheng is used to this kind of sarcasm, so he didn't retort, but just glanced at me indifferently.

"Next time I will remember to bring wine."

Meng Qian ignored me and looked at me: "He Yujun, do you really plan to live in the future? Parents don't care, you have to rely on yourself, buy a car, a house, see a doctor, eat, and save every penny for the family; you have to play your life to go to work , If you get fired, you won’t be able to pay the rent, have you ever worried about it? Besides smoking and drinking, what else do you care about?”

I was so angry that my temples throbbed: "I don't care about anything? I don't care about you?"

He said coldly, "I don't need you to care."

I took several breaths in a row before I managed to stabilize my emotions. The fishy smell rose in my throat, and I laughed angrily: "Okay, okay, I shouldn't care about you. I cared wrongly! Can I apologize for your crime?"

"I'm most annoyed by your eccentricity."

"I'm bothered, I'm damned, you and Fang Wenqian go get married."

"Did I say I'm not married?"

I froze in place.

The air in the living room quickly cooled down and became hot again like crazy. Foehn came from nowhere, as if in a furnace; Nonsense that doesn't make any sense.It was also like sea water rising, sweeping across the sky, destroying all sounds in this world.

Meng Qiansheng himself also seemed to be stunned. After recovering, he looked away, and his face was still cold, and he did not change his words.

I retrieved my voice from the cobweb dusty crevices, and I heard it like rusted copper, giving those who heard it an uncomfortable layer of goosebumps.

"You're not afraid of being disgusted by others."

Meng Qian didn't answer in a silent voice, her eyelashes drooped, and two gentle shadows fell down.

It seems like many years ago, when we sat reading under the lamp and worked out the last math problem together, neither of us made a sound, only the rustling of the pen across the rough draft paper, obviously no one looked at the other, but couldn’t help but stare at each other. The blank question paper grinned.

I heard the second hand ticking, the people upstairs walking back and forth, and the voices in my ears began to whisper again, calling my name, insulting me, and mocking me, all these noises were covered up by the crazy heartbeat in an instant, and the heartbeat was about to protrude from the chest, Subconsciously, my body wanted to bend over and hug me, but I forced myself to sit upright. The two orders ran counter to each other. The large muscles on my back began to twitch and tremble as if they were collapsing, and a thin layer of sweat gradually soaked out.

"Let's break up, Meng Qiansheng." The scalding liquid roared to pour out of the eye sockets, so I stopped talking, "Stop torturing each other."

The author says:

The fight is over in this chapter, and it will be gone in the future.