Spring Summer Autumn Winter

The July heat wave was rolling in, and even the wind became scorching. Li Yu'an's hut was like a steam oven, and the two of them could sweat even if they just sat still.

Li Yu'an would always secretly turn off the swing head of the electric fan when Yang Siyuan was not paying attention, and then adjust the direction so that it kept blowing on Yang Siyuan.

He felt that he had gotten used to it after all these years, but Yang Siyuan might not be able to bear it.

With him, Yang Siyuan had to endure a lot of grievances that he had never suffered before, which made him very uncomfortable.

Especially when he saw that Yang Siyuan washed their sweat-soaked clothes by hand every day, he felt even more uncomfortable.

Yang Siyuan must have never worked so hard before, he thought.

He could make a living, but he didn't want Yang Siyuan to suffer.

The temperature was terribly high that day, and the two of them were still working with their backs facing each other, but Li Yu'an could still feel that Yang Siyuan was actually a little irritable.He had an idea in his mind, but he didn't know how to say it. He hesitated and didn't write a few words for a long time.

He was hesitating, when he suddenly heard Yang Siyuan ask in a low voice: "Are you taking a rest?"

"Well... You should rest for a while too." Li Yu'an came back to his senses and replied.

As soon as he finished speaking, Yang Siyuan hugged him up, resting his chin on his shoulder, rubbing against him like a kitten.

Li Yu'an's back was pressed tightly against Yang Siyuan's chest, and the ups and downs of breathing made the skins of the two touch and then separated, and a subtle feeling emerged, making them hot from the inside out. .

Li Yu'an rolled his throat, controlled his heartbeat, and asked calmly, "Aren't you hot?"

"Hot." Yang Siyuan rubbed against his neck, his breathing gradually became rapid and heavy.

"Pull the fan...!" The words stopped abruptly, Li Yuan was startled by Yang Siyuan, and grabbed his hand suddenly.

Yang Siyuan has already reached into his clothes restlessly.

"you……"

"I feel hot."

Yang Siyuan's voice was extremely low, even a little trembling, as if he was deliberately suppressing something.

He took a deep breath, and all the smell of Li Yu'an poured into his nostrils, like an aphrodisiac injected into his brain, making certain nerves crazily agitated.

Li Yu'an's breathing became heavier and heavier, and the strength in his hands was so weak that it was not worth mentioning. Yang Siyuan was not restrained at all, but was provoked by his movement, and groped him even more recklessly.

Li Yu'an's whole body froze, and he didn't dare to move. He only felt that the places touched by Yang Siyuan's palms were hot as if they were on fire.

"So hot……"

Yang Siyuan murmured, and then started from his ears and licked Li Yuan's side neck and shoulder sockets, and at the same time, his two hands kept moving on his chest.

Li Yu'an's body was a little weak, and gradually lost his strength, he gave all the weight to Yang Siyuan, and leaned on him completely.

Yang Siyuan freed a hand to pinch his chin, and kissed him deeply, with a little impatience between his lips and teeth.

After parting his lips and tongue, he withdrew his hands and placed them on Li Yu'an's waist and legs, then exerted all his strength, hugged him horizontally onto the bed, and pressed him under him.

Li Yu'an felt as if something was pressing against him below...

"Yang Siyuan...you..."

Yang Siyuan raised his head, with confusion and confusion in his eyes, obviously losing his mind.

"Li Yu'an..."

He grabbed Li Yu'an's hand, interlocked his fingers, and pressed it on the head of the person under him, and then began to kiss and suck him impatiently.

This posture was too strong and too familiar, and it aroused the memory of Li Yu'an forcing himself to hide in a corner.

Late night, alcohol, people who also lost their minds, unnecessary resistance, marks all over the body, severe pain... The fragments were quickly pieced together and formed a knife, which ruthlessly pierced into his brain, pierced into that The most vulnerable part made him frightened instantly.

"Yang Siyuan!"

Gathering up all the strength he had, he broke free from Yang Siyuan, then pushed him away, and sat up abruptly.It's just that he got up so hard that he shook a little dizzily.

The moment he was pushed away, Yang Siyuan's consciousness finally cleared up, and he was startled by his actions at the moment, and hurried forward to support him, feeling worried and blaming himself.

"What, what's wrong?"

"It's okay, I'm a little dizzy."

Yang Siyuan quickly pulled down Li Yu'an's clothes and tidied them up. Seeing the hickey marks on his body, he wished he could slap him.

"Yes, I'm sorry...I'm confused...I don't know why..." He didn't know how to explain, so he could only speak incoherently.

He was like this a long time ago, as if there were two people living in his body, with Li Yuan's departure as the node, the previous Yang Siyuan hid quietly, and then gave birth to another self, full of the aura he hated ——The aura of Yang Jianxin and Chen Limei.This Yang Siyuan grew slowly and secretly, even he himself didn't notice it. It wasn't until after the showdown with Yang Jianxin that he realized that he had changed so much.

Although he would let go of all his defenses in front of Li Yu'an, he was still his youthful self, but these years, he really missed and tortured others, so sometimes he still couldn't restrain himself, and when he saw Li Yu'an, he wanted to pounce on him and eat him.

They're all adults, and that's normal.But Li Yu'an was special, he couldn't ignore his feelings.

So asshole, so asshole.Yang Siyuan kept scolding himself in his heart.

He apologized in a panic, but suddenly felt Li Yu'an gently hold his hand.

"It's me who should say I'm sorry." Li Yu'an lowered his head and whispered.

Obviously they are already lovers, this is a way of expressing love between lovers, it's just that some shadows in his heart can't accept it, it's not Yang Siyuan's fault anyway.

Yang Siyuan couldn't hear him blaming himself, so he quickly said, "No, I just made a mistake... I, I will never do it again..."

"You..." Li Yuan held his hand a little harder. "Give me some time..."

Yang Siyuan hurriedly nodded like a rattle drum and said, "You, you can do whatever you want! Even if you can't accept it forever!"

Li Yu'an smiled bitterly: "I'm sorry."

"Stop talking...you have nothing to be sorry for me..." Yang Siyuan was so distressed that he didn't dare to hug him now, so he could only gently caress his face to comfort him, and then made a swearing gesture to promise : "I will take a shower when I get hot in the future, and I will never do this again!"

When he mentioned this, Li Yuan remembered what he wanted to say at the beginning, and quickly changed the subject: "Uh, I want...to buy an air conditioner."

Yang Siyuan was taken aback for a moment, but immediately became happy: "Ah? Ah! Good!"

He was happy for Li Yu'an, because it meant that Li Yu'an had begun to live a good life, but he didn't think about it deeply, and didn't know that Li Yu'an was actually doing this for him.

"But I..." Li Yu'an said, looking a little embarrassed.

Yang Siyuan immediately knew why he was in trouble, and immediately said: "The air conditioner is used by the two of us, so each of us pays half of the price, okay?"

He didn't care about all the clothes and other things, but he had to take into account Li Yuan's self-esteem for such a large expense, and he didn't want him to feel that he owed him anything.

With such a delicate mind, Li Yu'an had nothing to say, and besides, he had never successfully resisted.

"En." He nodded, looked into Yang Siyuan's eyes and smiled slightly.

With just such a smile, Yang Siyuan felt that he had been accountable here for the rest of his life.

……

The two then went to the mall to buy an air conditioner, and it was installed the next day, but they finally enjoyed a comfortable afternoon.

Yang Siyuan moved the guitar to a place away from the air conditioner, remembering that when he first moved in, Li Yuan used to look at the guitar in a daze.

When Li Yuan got tired of writing and rested, he leaned over and asked, "Why did you keep looking at my guitar? Do you want to hear me play it?"

"...No. It's just...you've never played before, don't you need practice?.

Yang Siyuan smiled: "Don't talk about anything else, I'll just ask you if you want to listen to me play?"

Li Yu'an knew that he had seen through his thoughts long ago, so he had nothing to say and could only acquiesce.

"Which song do you like? You must answer." Yang Siyuan said.

Li Yu'an was silent for a while, but finally gave in, took out his phone, and played the song "Arrival".

Yang Siyuan had practiced this song so many times, he was so familiar with it that he couldn't be more familiar with it. As soon as the prelude came out, he froze in place.

After the song was played, he still hadn't recovered.

"I heard it by accident in a bar before, what do you think...?" Li Yu'an asked.

Yang Siyuan stared at him without speaking.

Li Yu'an thought he didn't like it, so he quickly turned off the music, lowered his head to avoid his gaze, and thought about what kind of song he would like.

As a result, Yang Siyuan suddenly hugged him tightly, and whispered in his ear: "Do you know that we are made for each other?"

There is a regrettable thing in this world, that is, God secretly drew a line between two people, but never let them know.It’s like Yang Siyuan once sang alone to Li Yu’an on an empty number one night, and Li Yu’an, who was covered in bruises, happened to hear this song in the bar that day, but they would never know that this song actually traveled through space in their entire lives , passed from one person's mouth to another's ear.

What Yang Siyuan said was right, they were a match made in heaven, it was arranged by God.

Li Yu'an was in a fog, couldn't understand what he was talking about, and didn't know whether he liked the song or not, but he didn't dare to ask again, so he could only let him hug him like this, and at the same time, he grabbed the sweetness brought by his hug. warmth.

……

In the evening, Li Yu'an went to work after dinner. He refused to let Yang Siyuan see him off, but he couldn't hold back Yang Siyuan, so he had to drag his family along.This trip can be regarded as a lot of things have been shaken out.

Brother Ling happened to be in the store that day, sitting at the bar drinking and chatting with people, and Yang Siyuan happened to be sitting beside him, waiting for Li Yuan to change and come out.

The two of them didn't know each other, and they didn't have much contact with each other. It wasn't until Li Yu'an came out that Brother Ling called out "handsome guy", and Yang Siyuan started to look at him.

Casually provocative, not serious.This is Yang Siyuan's first impression.

He himself didn't realize that "handsome guy" is actually a very common title, he just simply felt that this person was molesting his boyfriend.At this time, his possessiveness and childishness burst out at the same time, and he had to win back and let this flowered shirt see who Li Yuan was.

Just when Li Yu'an got dressed and came to change shifts, he waved his hands at him and yelled, "An'an!"

Both Li Yu'an and Brother Ling were stunned for a moment, then blushed for a moment, and turned to look at him playfully.

How could Li Yu'an bear this tone, this address, he walked quickly to Yang Siyuan, and whispered, "I'm at work."

"That's right, so I'm calling the waiter." Yang Siyuan said with wide innocent eyes.

Brother Ling was still watching a joke, his eyes flicked back and forth between the two of them, and there was a bewildered smile on the corner of his mouth.

"...Then what do you want?" Li Yu'an said as he adjusted his glasses.

Yang Siyuan blinked: "Well...Actually, I want to drink the kind of milk tea you specially made for me." He still pronounced the word "specially" very emphatically.

Brother Ling let out a "poof" laugh.

Li Yu'an almost wanted to sew Yang Siyuan's mouth shut, so he hurriedly said "no" and went away to entertain the guests.

Seeing that he was some distance away, Brother Ling asked Yang Siyuan with a smile: "Are you..."

Yang Siyuan smiled like a winner and said, "Li Yuan's boyfriend."

"Oh——" Brother Ling nodded, "You are Yang...Yang...I'm sorry I can't remember."

Yang Siyuan frowned: "Yang Siyuan. Do you know me?"

Brother Ling saw that the kid was very playful, so he wanted to tease him. He took a sip of his wine and said slowly, "I know, but he rejected me cruelly because of you."

"?!"

Sure enough, I didn't miss it, this is really a rival in love!

Brother Ling was amused by his angry look, waved his hands and said, "Don't worry, he's full of you, I have no chance at all."

of course.Yang Siyuan thought.

The conversation should have stopped here, but the person in front of him obviously knew something about Li Yu'an. Yang Siyuan actually wanted to learn from him how Li Yu'an lived without him. After all, Li Yu'an never said anything about it.

He glanced at Li Yu'an and saw that Li Yu'an was still busy there, so he asked, "He mentioned me to you?"

Brother Ling thought for a while and said, "It doesn't count, I called your name when I was unconscious."

"Coma?" Yang Siyuan suddenly became nervous.

"Yeah." Brother Ling put down his glass and said. "Once something happened in a bar and he was beaten so badly that he passed out."

"Slapped?" Upon hearing that Li Yu'an was being bullied, Yang Siyuan immediately switched modes, put back all the childish mentality just now, and asked in a deep voice.

Brother Ling smiled: "Why, do you want to call back? Don't think about it, you've entered the game early."

Depend on.Yang Siyuan gritted his teeth.

Brother Ling caught a glimpse of his expression, drank another sip of wine, and then suppressed his smug smile, and said seriously: "He has been waiting for you. I did have a crush on him at the time, thinking that we are both single anyway. , and he said that it is impossible for you to be together, so I asked him if he would like to fall in love with me. I don’t care if he doesn’t mind, he is alone, he can’t live by himself, it’s always good to have someone with him He also considered it for a while, but in the end he refused because he couldn't let go of you. Even if we couldn't be together, he couldn't let go."

Yang Siyuan felt his heartbeat stop when he listened.

Because it's really...so distressing.

Finally, Brother Ling sighed and patted him on the shoulder: "He has suffered for you for a long time, please don't abandon him. He can't accept anyone else except you."

Yang Siyuan remained silent, looking at the thin figure with mixed feelings in his heart.

But he is clear about one thing, that is, he will never let go in his life, no matter what he pays, he will not abandon Li Yuan.

……

On the way home in the middle of the night, Yang Siyuan was extremely silent. Li Yu'an thought that he had made him angry, and secretly glanced at him from time to time, thinking about how to cheer him up.

Before he could think of a move, Yang Siyuan suddenly stopped in place.

The light from the street lamp swept a shadow over his eye sockets, hiding his eyes, but looking at the drooping corners of his mouth would never be a happy expression.

Li Yuan also stopped and looked at him nervously.

Suddenly, Yang Siyuan stepped forward and hugged him gently.This hug was different from the previous ones. What he hugged was not his shoulders, but his waist, which was the most gentle gesture.

"...What's the matter?" Li Yu'an's inner doubts became more and more intense, and he couldn't help asking.

Yang Siyuan rubbed his neck and said softly, "I like you so much...I think I'm in love with you."

As soon as Li Yuan put his hands on his back, he was stopped by these words.

They have all confessed to each other and expressed their "like" feelings unabashedly, but they have never used the word "love".

"Like" is very simple, all you need is a heartbeat, and its charm lies in its hazy and sweetness.

But "love" is different, it is much heavier than "like", it rejects selfishness and impulsiveness, it needs to really engrave a person into one's heart, and a heart is too small, usually only accommodates one person . "Love" is clear and profound, and it is a matter of a lifetime. It does not allow hazyness, and it is not all sweet.

"Love" is a promise that will be fulfilled in a lifetime.

Life is too long, there are countless accidents will happen.But Li Yu'an still didn't have a complete sense of security, he was always making preparations - Yang Siyuan no longer liked his preparations.

Because of this, he never thought about the word "love", although he knew that he had already fallen into it thoroughly.

So when he heard Yang Siyuan say this, he didn't know how to react.He kind of wanted to say "No, you're just impulsive, you don't necessarily want to spend your whole life with me", but at the same time, he chewed Yang Siyuan's confession selfishly and treasured it as a treasure.

They embraced each other under the dim street lights in the middle of the night, and there was no one around them, only those bugs yearning for light were flying around them, and the whole world seemed to be silent for their embrace.

"Go home, I'll sing for you, okay?"

"……Um."

……

Those who reach heaven pass through hell; those who reach you continue to run in dreams.

The person who reaches happiness walks through suffering; the person who reaches you will keep running around in this life.

"I'm sure." Yang Siyuan stared at Li Yu'an.

"I love you, Li Yu'an."