Kidney loss

Shen Yan was stunned for a moment, then laughed: "What are you talking about... um!" He didn't expect the other party to really kiss him like this, and he couldn't dodge it for a while, and it was too late to run away.

Relying on his injuries, Su Jianian deliberately stuffed the plastered arm into Shen Yan's arms, making the other party struggle or not, and just kissed helplessly for several minutes until he was out of breath. separate.

Wiping away the saliva overflowing from the corner of the man's mouth, Su Jianian asked again: "Can we talk now?"

Shen Yan's eyes were darkened by his kiss, and it took him a while to regain his composure: "You boy..." He opened his mouth halfway, but fell silent for some reason, and finally took out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket.

Shen Yan came to the window and opened it, lit a cigarette and took a puff. In the white mist, he closed his eyes.

"I'm downstairs... I met my father." The cigarette butt at his fingertips trembled, and a wisp of ash fell and scattered in the wind. "He looks a lot older and doesn't seem like the jerk he used to be...but still, I can't forgive him."

Shen Yan thought back to the year when his mother died, his whole world was gray, he hid in the quilt and cried day and night, as if the sky falling was not so terrible...Obviously all he needed was a word of comfort, obviously he only needed to be comforted. That man... the man he called his father, it would be great if he could pay more attention to him.Although he didn't say it, he had actually been waiting... But all he had to wait for was new loves one after another, and illegitimate children one after another.

He was also vulnerable before, but his vulnerability could not change the cruel reality—in order to fulfill his mother's wishes, he had to become stronger, not relying on, not relying on, and only relying on himself to get to the present day... and Until this time, he realized that the man seemed to be thinking about him.

How ridiculous, as if he still cared—at his most difficult moment, the man called father never appeared, and even completely abandoned him in the dark.Now that person is sick, old, and may not even live for a few days - it was at this time that he finally remembered that he still had a son, and wanted to be reunited with his filial father and son Ci's family... But Shen Yan wanted to ask, why?

Where was that man when he needed his father's care?

Since he has never fulfilled his responsibilities as a father, he has no obligation to be a filial son, not to mention that Shen Yan feels that he is generous enough, at least after taking over the company, he has been bearing the other party's high medical and hospital expenses, but This is already his limit, more things, he can't give, and he doesn't want to give...

But why is it so uncomfortable?I should hate him...

Just as he was thinking, a strong arm wrapped around his waist. Shen Yan turned around and found that Su Jianian was standing behind him at some point. Anxiety in his heart.Shen Yan patted the back of the opponent's hand with some emotion, and finally seemed to think of something, and frowned: "Why did you come down?"

He stubbed out the cigarette butt, turned around and was about to bring him back to the bed, but Su Jianian hugged him dumbfoundedly: "I'm not as fragile as you think, and I've been lying on the bed for several days. paralysis……"

"That's not okay, what if we bump into each other again?" Shen Yan insisted on telling him to lie back, but Su Jianian hugged his waist and didn't let go, and put his chin on his shoulder for a while, then suddenly said: " "If you don't want to forgive, then don't forgive."

Shen Yan was stunned for a moment before realizing what the other party was referring to, and replied instinctively: "I never forgave him."

"Then just keep going like this." Su Jianian said, "Now that you know your answer, go see him with this in mind...don't let him affect you, let alone leave you with regrets .”

"...you mean..."

"Go and see him, Brother Shen, but don't forgive him." Su Jianian tilted his head, and kissed the man's ear: "Maybe after reading it, you will feel better..."

Shen Yan was silent for a moment, then said, "I will think about it."

After he finished speaking, he kissed his lover's lips back. Outside the window was white clouds and blue sky. The sunshine dispelled the last haze, leaving behind a bright future.

There is no hurdle that cannot be overcome, especially if there is someone who can hold your hand.

Later, when Shen Yan returned home, she found old photos from several years ago... After her mother died, her father took down all the group photos in the old house. He originally planned to throw them away, but Shen Yan secretly picked them up and hid them. many years.

Although he left the photos, he has never looked through them carefully—one is because he is afraid of being hurt by the scene, and the other is that he is afraid that he will not be able to help but do some outrageous things after reading it...Now he is able to calm down look at it all.Shen Yan wiped off the thick dust on the wedding photo, revealing two young faces.

The facial features in the photo are somewhat blurred, but it can be vaguely seen that they are a pair of handsome men and beautiful women. At that time, they had no grievances, no divisions, and only two fiery hearts that loved each other.

Shen Yan looked at the two familiar strangers in the photo, and suddenly felt that his father's decision to burn it back then was correct - only when he saw the beauty of the past again, could he realize how dilapidated it is now , dying.

So Shen Yan took the photo to the roof, chose a place without debris, and lit it on fire.

Burning flames flickered in his pupils, and those two faces were eaten away by scorched black... Little by little, when the wedding dress turned from whiteness to scorched earth, when the vows turned from sincerity to sharp blades...

None of this has anything to do with him.

The people of the previous generation, the things of the previous generation, have passed away, have been worn away by time, and are slowly let go.

He will have that day too.

……

Su Jianian's discharge from the hospital is scheduled for a week later.

He has had the stitches removed, but the shaved piece of hair won't grow back for a while, so he can only cover it up with a hat; besides, the plaster cast will take more than a month to remove, and there is nothing else Another question.

Since Feng Bai smelled out smoking in the ward last time, Shen Yan also temporarily quit smoking, and instead held a lollipop in his mouth, Su Jianian would always snatch it away in various ways. ...Well, then exchange a sweet kiss.

Sometimes it's oranges, sometimes grapes, sometimes apples... But Su Jianian still likes the milk flavor the most, so the lollipops in Shen Yan's pocket are replaced with milk flavors, sometimes getting annoyed by kisses, Just put a stick in the other person's mouth.

But the ones who kiss and touch like this are all men, so it is inevitable that there will be times when their guns go off, but every time they are about to take off their pants, Dr. Feng will knock on the door on time to check on shifts. Shen Yan couldn't take it anymore, so she agreed to leave the hospital The proposal... Although he didn't know that the other party was timing the ignition.

In short, in order to celebrate Su Jianian's discharge from the hospital, Shen Yan specially booked a table at the best restaurant in the city, and also prepared flowers for the reservation, intending to be romantic and make up for what was owed before.The two of them packed up their things that day, and when Shen Yan went downstairs to go through the discharge procedures, suddenly several doctors rushed all the way pushing the trundle bed, people on the way automatically avoided, even Shen Yan was no exception.He looked at the receipt in his hand, thinking about how to confess his love for dinner at night, and he was in a good mood when he heard someone say: "The one who was pushed in just now... seems to be Mr. Shen?"

"Hey, don't talk about it, cardiac arrest - it was fine before, after all, it's getting old, and the cerebral hemorrhage almost disappeared before, if you don't take a good rest, people push you to "relax" every day... I don't know this time What has stimulated me again, hey..." It was a little nurse who replied, who seemed to be watching the incident, "I don't know what his son and daughter are doing. The old man lived in the hospital alone for several months. Almost no one has come to see his assistant, it's pathetic..."

Before she could finish her sentence, someone pressed her shoulders suddenly, she screamed in fright, and turned her head to face a pale face.

Shen Yan opened his mouth several times before finding his own voice, "Which room is he...in?"

"Who……?"

"Shen Xin."

"Oh... oh," the little nurse reported the location, and the other party ran away without looking back, thinking that the son came late enough... It's a pity that the old man may be in danger this time.

Shen Yan ran all the way upstairs, saw Assistant Wang standing outside the door at a glance, rushed forward without saying a word, and lifted the other party's collar: "What's going on!"

The other party also looked helpless, and now he was out of breath by Shen Yan again, and spoke with difficulty: "Shen... Boss... Cough cough, cough..."

Shen Yan let the person go with a dark face, and when the other person had coughed enough, he calmed down a lot, and took a deep breath: "...What's going on, didn't you get better before?"

Assistant Wang wiped his face, "...Ever since I told him you would come to the hospital, he asked me to push him out every day and walk around the hospital, hoping to meet you... The doctor told him to rest, But he refused to listen, and the result, the result..." The elderly man closed his eyes, and there was a broken sobbing sound in his voice: "He saw...you and your little lover..."

"You would rather have a private meeting with your lover than see him..."

Shen Yan could no longer hear the words that followed.

He saw the other party's mouth opening and closing, with a mournful and terrified expression on his face, tears filled his wrinkled eyes, flowing down his bark-like face, and disappearing in the gully of the skin.

From the other party's fierce body language - Assistant Wang grabbed his arm with such force that his five fingers didn't even penetrate the skin. Shen Yan felt pain, and also felt the other party's blame and even hatred... as if he killed that person Same.

Are you kidding me...what the hell does this have to do with me...

Shen Yan was thinking like this, but his breathing seemed to be uncontrollable and rapid. He was like a patient suffering from asthma, his heartbeat suddenly accelerated, and his eyes became dark because of overbreathing. He staggered and fell backwards involuntarily. To... pour into a warm embrace.

Su Jianian waited for quite a while but didn't see the other party coming up. On the way downstairs, he happened to hear the nurse talking, and hurried over, only to see Shen Yan collapsing - he ignored his hand that was still in plaster, and stepped forward Catching the crumbling man with his body, he took a few steps back with his arms around his limp waist, and leaned against the cold wall of the hospital.

Shen Yan trembled in his arms, the man bit his lips to suppress the pain rolling down his throat, Su Jianian had to put a finger into his blood-stained mouth, forcing him to open his mouth Panting... He didn't know how to use words to comfort him, so he could only kiss Shen Yan's trembling ears over and over again, with utmost tenderness.

Assistant Wang's voice echoed in the cold corridor of the hospital: "...he has been thinking about you all the time, and no matter what he says these years, he will leave his place for you. He just wants to see you once, that's all..."

But even this side, did not have time to see.

But after more than half an hour, the lights in the operating room went out, and the doctor came out and said sorry.

As soon as Assistant Wang's legs gave way, he knelt on the ground, hugged the doctor's leg and cried loudly, but the other party said: "The patient's heartbeat has stopped since before he was sent here..."

Mr. Shen was furious to death.

He had been neglected and neglected by him for decades, and it was only when he was about to die that he suddenly thought of his own son who wanted to make up.

Thinking of this, Shen Yan suddenly laughed, he couldn't hold back his laughter, he couldn't stand still, his whole body was supported by Su Jianian, and he buried his face into the other's chest that smelled of hospital disinfectant.

Su Jianian's liver felt warm and wet for a while, he knew that it was Shen Yan's tears, but he didn't say anything.

He just stood there, like a silent and gentle patron saint, embracing the extremely fragile body of the other party with his injured arm, and kissing the hair on the top of the man's head.

After a while, Shen Yan finally regained his strength. He raised his head, his eyes were red, but there were no tears.

He only said one sentence: take me away.

Su Jianian took Shen Yan home - he couldn't drive because of his hand injury, so he called a taxi.On the way, Shen Yan was sitting by the window seat, always turning his head to look at the flowing scenery outside the window. Su Jianian reached out and grabbed his wrist. Not half of my heart.

Arriving home in such a depressing atmosphere, as soon as he entered the house, Shen Yan locked himself in the room, Su Jianian stood at the door, and did not choose to rush in.

He was waiting for the other party to take the initiative to open the door—to open the door, and to open the closed door of his heart. He had done enough things to prove his sincerity, but until now, he still couldn't offset the anxiety in his heart...

He understood most of the cause of Shen Yan's father's death from the assistant's discordant crying, and the key point was actually inseparable from him - this knowledge made Su Jianian extremely panicked, like a person who had stepped off a cliff, If no one can pull him up, he will fall from the sky...

And the next moment, a hand grabbed him.

The door in front of him was opened at some time, Shen Yan stood inside, took Su Jianian's arm, and pulled the dazed young man onto the bed - the soft bedding touched his body, Su Jianian had just returned Suddenly, he felt a weight on him.He raised his head and saw Shen Yan's eyes under the backlight, they were still a little red and swollen from crying, but they were no longer vulnerable.

The older man leaned down, kissed the lips of his lover who was several years younger than him, and whispered two words in a low and hoarse voice next to the other's ear.

"...fuck me."