Pretend to be straight

When I was in the elevator, my face was still buried on Shi Jinghe's shoulder.

She had already buttoned up my coat and hat for me, and a passer-by saw that she was inconvenient to press the button and asked her which floor, and she thanked her when she returned.

One of her hands was around my waist and the other was pressing on the back of my head. My eyes were dark, only a few rays of light came in through the cracks.

Maybe they wanted to see me crying, and when I thought about it, I felt really embarrassed that I was like this.

So embarrassing.

But it was too late, especially when I had already entered her apartment, the idea was even stronger.

I had let go of Shi Jinghe, covered my face and changed my shoes, and then sat down on the sofa.

The sound of Shi Jinghe opening her bedroom door came out, I didn't look back, I still covered my face, eyes opened through my fingers and stared at the ground.

The hat has been pushed back by me, and I raised my hand to touch it again, only to find that my hair is also messy at the moment.

OK, there are no images left.

Not long after, the sound of Shi Jinghe's slippers stepping on the ground came from far to near - she was already standing in front of me.

I sniffed and saw that she had squatted down in front of me.

My vision is still a bit blurry from remaining tears in my eyelashes and eye sockets, and my voice is a little hoarse from crying.

Shi Jinghe sighed softly, she grabbed my hands and pressed them down, then raised her hands and wiped my tears meticulously with the handkerchief she had just brought into the bedroom.

The handkerchief is soft and feels no discomfort to my skin.

When I saw her for the second time, I wiped my tears with her handkerchief. Unexpectedly, three months later, I was still wiping my tears with her handkerchief.

It's just that she did it with her own hands instead of me rubbing it.

The room was quiet for a while, and after 2 minutes, Shi Jinghe put the handkerchief on the coffee table.

Then she sat next to me and said nothing.

But I didn't dare to turn my head. I didn't dare to open my eyes when she squatted in front of me just now.

But I had to talk, so I kept my head lower and lower, and I still said those three words: "I'm sorry..."

Sorry to upset her with my indecision.

I'm sorry, because my wayward behavior is causing her trouble again.

I feel that I have been sorry to her a lot, and it is not just an apology that can get the job done.

Shi Jinghe responded with a nasal voice: "Yes."

My hands are twisting their fingers, and my hair hangs down the sides of my head.

I thought for two seconds, and then said, "I didn't mean to be angry with you." I became more nervous, "I, I, I just..."

I just really don't know how to express my love.

The two of us are like this now, Shi Jinghe has always been the one who takes the initiative.

She said she wanted to see me and asked if I didn't understand.

She said she missed me and let her fans know through Weibo.

……

She is braver than me, and I am more passive than her, and at this point, there is nothing I need to be proud of.

Now I am full of guilt, guilty that I have caused her to be wronged by being so passive, guilty that I have to let her take care of me even after I cry.

As if I had started to stutter, Shi Jinghe smiled lightly, and then I heard her say: "Lu Zhi, I have a question for you."

"Huh? You ask." I can speak smoothly again.

Shi Jinghe leaned back, she was leaning against the sofa, the voice seemed to come from far away.

She asked, "Are you mistaking consolation for love?" She paused, before waiting for my answer, "What should I do? I feel more and more like this now."

I immediately turned my head, looked at her, and shook my head: "No." I repeated, "No."

I have already met her eyes, and the distance between their eyes is less than one meter.

She looked at me, her eyes were bent, and pear dimples appeared, but the words that came out of her mouth made me choke: "Really?"

My tears were about to come out: "I didn't dislike you, and I didn't regard comfort as love, I..."

But the next second I was speechless, because Shi Jinghe had already hugged me in her arms.

Her clothes have been changed, and they are different from the previous ones, probably because they were dirty from my tears.

The clothes have the smell of laundry detergent, which is faint, and I think it smells good.

Shi Jinghe put her chin on the top of my head, and she called me softly: "Zhizhi..."

I closed my eyes and put my arms around her waist again.

That's how she called me in a low but gentle voice.

My mind was blank, but I quickly figured out the context. I took a breath and said, "I'm just scared." One point, "I'm afraid that if I express my love casually, it will be just ordinary things and scenes in my recollection. I want to wait a little longer, and when I feel appropriate, I will say that I like you."

But obviously, I have to say it today. Anyway, I didn't figure out what occasion and time to say I like it.

I raised my head, looked at her, and said word by word: "I like you."

After saying this, my eyes turned red again: "You must not misunderstand me, and my feelings must not be misunderstood."

Shi Jinghe looked straight at me with beautiful eyes, she didn't respond to my confession immediately, but asked me: "Is it true?"

I nodded madly: "It's true."

My voice lowered again: "Don't be angry."

She didn't speak, just looked at me quietly, as if she wanted to imprint me in her eyes.

After staring at each other for an unknown amount of time, Shi Jinghe raised his hand and rubbed the top of my head.

She didn't look at me anymore, but looked out of the window, and she said: "I was just teasing you out of habit, and I thought you would say it as I said, or you don't have to say it, and I don't have it if you say it." It’s okay to tell you that I like you, then I’ll tell you.” She turned her head when she said this, “You didn’t have any, and you were silent.”

She hooked her lips and frowned: "Even if I'm angry, it's reasonable, right?"

"Yes." I couldn't agree more, if I were her, I would be pissed off by my performance this afternoon.

Oh no, add to that the evening ones, which were terrible.

Even though it made my heart beat faster yesterday, it made me stop breathing today.

"I've been thinking about it for a long time today. Is it because I pushed you too hard, that's why you are so..." She thought of a word, "Hesitate."

She added: "I even thought that the favor you showed for me was also fake."

I shook my head again: "No..."

The corner of Shi Jinghe's mouth raised an arc: "Well, I see."

After she finished speaking, she stretched out her hand to hold my face, and then rubbed my face arbitrarily.

My mouth was pouted by her actions, and I couldn't speak clearly: "I shrink with you..."

Shi Jinghe imitated my words: "Shrink what?"

I grabbed her wrist and emphasized again: "I like you."

"Really really like it."

It has been several years since I said "like" last time, and I never thought that one day, I would say these two words to someone again.

I like it, and I am also happy.

After saying it, it seems that I will not get tired of saying it many times.

Everyone's ability to express emotions is different. Some people are direct and bold, while others are reserved.

And me... I don't know.

It may belong to the double contradiction type of being bold and timid, because in fact, I myself really planned to confess later... But the plan couldn't keep up with the changes, so I said it in advance.

And I don't know how long it was in advance, after all, I didn't think about it.

But now is a good time, at least I am satisfied.

Shi Jinghe held my hand in hers, she frowned, looked at our intertwined hands, and said, "Because I posted about you on Weibo, Mimi is very interested in you, I want to meet you, I took you to her today because I want to introduce you to her, because she is also my friend, and you..."

Her expression became aggrieved, she let go of my hand, stood up by herself, and looked down at me: "Stop talking, go and wash your face, now it looks the same as when Jiujiu was painted."

I obediently went into the bathroom and came out after a while.

Washing my face can also make me calm and sober. Anyway, I have already said that I like it, so I can no longer be passive.

After wiping my face, I heard Shi Jinghe say: "It's a bit late, I'll see you off..."

"Can't I sleep on the sofa?" I looked at her and asked.

Shi Jinghe was obviously stunned for a few seconds: "Huh?"

I sat down on the sofa again and looked sideways at her: "I..." I simply leaned over and hugged her again, "I don't want to leave you."

I'm a clingy person, I've always known it.

But ever since Qiu Yu said that I was annoying, I rarely had such a time.

Thinking about it carefully, how much has Qiu Yu influenced my current appearance?

In the past, I would express my emotions without hesitation when I liked it, but now I have to consider several times whether it is possible or not.

Of course, it may also be due to age and temperament. When I first fell in love, I was 89 years old, and now I am 24.

So fast, I'm 24, but I'm not the same as I was three months ago, I don't have nothing now.

I still have Shi Jinghe, I have a liking for her, and she also has a liking for me.

Thinking of this, I also remembered one thing: "But senior sister, you haven't said you like me until now."

"I thought I expressed it clearly enough." Shi Jinghe's soft voice sounded around my ears.

I shook my head, not enough in the dimple of her neck.

"That……"

Before Shi Jing and the following words could be said, she moved, changed her position, took one side of the sofa cushion behind my head, and pushed me down.

I was almost half lying down, and my calves were still stepping on the ground outside the sofa.

Shi Jinghe was not so close to me that I could hear her breathing, but looking at her from this angle, I was so nervous that my heart was about to jump out.

I opened my eyes and watched her mouth slightly raised and then slowly lowered her head. Just when I thought she would kiss me, she turned away and said to my ear: "Do you mean I like you?"

I swallowed, nodded, and fell into her trap: "Yes... I like you."

She laughed, her breath sprinkled around my ears, which made me almost tremble, and she responded to me: "Well, I like you too, I don't dislike you, and I don't misunderstand you, I just want...to make you calm. "

After she finished speaking, she braced her body and wanted to get up, but I didn't let her go.

I raised my hand and gently wrapped her neck around her neck, looked into her eyes, and asked, "If Miss Sister doesn't date online, then...do you want to fall in love?"

I couldn't bear it anymore, and slowly approached her to imprint my lips on the corner of her lips. As soon as I touched here, I was a little afraid again, tilted my head, and kissed her dimple.

Although she is not smiling now, and the pear dimple is not showing, but I remember its location very accurately.

And this movement is a test of waist strength, my physical strength is average, and I lay back in a few seconds.

Shi Jinghe didn't make any movements or expressions, I licked my lower lip, and tried my best to pick up the next sentence - "I'm super sweet, it's true."