The Blaze of Xueba

Boyhood ([-])

Li Lie didn't know if he was used to being stepped on by Zhou Yan. Zhou Yan stepped down and skipped the step of feeling the "pain" and became numb, with a smirk on his face, his eyes narrowed into a slit, pretending to be nonchalant .

Li Lie's insensitive and dignified manner still leaning on Zhou Yan's body made Zhou Yan understand him better - if he was said to be as thick-skinned as a rhinoceros, the rhinoceros would jump up and object.

It wasn't until the bell rang for the end of the third period that the principal finally ended his spitting lectures. All classes began to disband in order and returned to the classroom one by one.

Class 17 was finally disbanded, and Zhou Yan mixed in with the bustling crowd.It has been two weeks since school started, and he is still alone.He looked up and saw that most of the people were walking in groups, the boys were in groups of four or four, the girls were in groups of three or four, the boys hooked their shoulders and their backs were laughing and joking, the girls' ponytails were swaying in the bright sun, holding hands, chirping and gossiping. .

Only he is alone.

He slowed down, almost pacing, he felt that he was so out of place in this huge crowd, and even a little shy.

It's hard to live alone.Usually, he doesn't feel anything wrong with being alone, but when he really magnifies this kind of solitude in the crowd, he is not only afraid, but also very uncomfortable.

The entire first graders started going up and down the stairs in black and white school uniforms. Zhou Yan had a slight trysophobia, and he wanted to wait until the number of people on the stairs became less before going up.He walked under a camphor tree, squinted his eyes, and stared at the people who were fighting in the corridor.

After Li Lie was left by Lao Cai to explain some things about the class, he began to look for Zhou Yan in the crowd, and he caught sight of the quiet boy standing under the tree at a glance.

Li Lie walked over quietly, patted Zhou Yan, and asked with a smile, "What are you thinking, so preoccupied?"

In the past, Zhou Yan would definitely think why Li Lie was so annoying and provoked him every day, but just now he patted him lightly, so familiar as if he hadn't seen an old friend for many years, as if they had known each other for many years, Some sourness surged in his heart inexplicably.

Zhou Yan didn't look at Li Lie, just shook his head lightly and said, "It's just in a daze."

Li Lie was not afraid of getting dirty and leaned against the thick trunk of the camphor tree. A large swath of sunlight fell through the emerald green leaves and fell on Li Lie. He closed his eyes slightly, as if melting in the warm sunlight.

Zhou Yan turned around and saw Li Lie in this paradise, unrestrained, free and uninhibited, and envied him very much. When will he be as free and unrestrained as Li Lie.

This quiet and calm look conflicts too much with Li Lie's usual image of big, big, and thick. If Wu Fatty would think that Li Lie was in love, Zhou Yan somehow admired Li Lie like this, at least he didn't hate him, so he deliberately I watched Li Lie for a while.

Even with his eyes closed, Li Lie could see Zhou Yan's fixed gaze on him. He persuaded himself to be patient, but he couldn't hold back when his blood surged up, and he opened his eyes like a fake corpse. Clamping Zhou Yan's shoulders with both hands, he pressed him against the tree trunk, staring at him.

Zhou Yan experienced the hell in broad daylight. He stared at Li Lie and asked, "What are you doing?!"

Li Lie was splashed with cold water by Zhou Yan's stern and stern expression. He regretted it too much. The time is not yet ripe, he was too hasty.

While he was in a state of desperation, he somehow came up with a shocking excuse, "Your brother, I am saving you, you know, I saw a bird flying over your head just now, but fortunately I caught you in time, otherwise your school uniform would be a mess." It’s not guaranteed, it’s a shame to be covered with bird droppings.”

Although Zhou Yan heard what he said clearly and logically, he felt ominous from Li Lie's sudden almost domineering action just now, and it seemed to imply other meanings.

Before he could figure it out, Li Lie shouted loudly, "Look, these are still the three birds from the morning!"

Zhou Yan looked up, and it really was those three cute little birds.Those three little birds seemed to understand Li Lie's current predicament very well, and gave him a piece of shit for a bird that was so generous, and the white bird droppings fell on the ground, and Li Lie's heart was at ease. He patted his chest, He smiled and said to Zhou Yan, "Look, I didn't lie to you." After he finished speaking, he looked at the three playful and understanding birds gratefully, and sighed in his heart, you are really my god assist, tomorrow I will Bring bird food to feed you.

Zhou Yan was shocked, but there was nothing he could do, now he could do whatever he said.Li Lie was still panting, Zhou Yan immediately asked a more lethal question, he looked at Li Lie with unprecedented sincerity, and asked, "Why do you always follow me?"

Even if Zhou Yan had a cold face and a cold heart, he couldn't stand Li Lie's fiery stickiness. One time and three times can be said to be accidental, but nine times and ten times are inevitable. Li Lie is completely different from him and others. I don't know if he did it on purpose. Or is there another reason.

He just went through a lot of words in his mind, and finally chose the word "follow" without emotion to ask him - why do you always follow me?

Usually Zhou Yan is cold and frightening, and what he says most to Li Lie is "Get out!" In front of Zhou Yan, there was an inexplicable tendency to be masochistic. While he was content with it, his face became thicker and thicker, and he panicked if he didn't get scolded by Zhou Yan for a moment.

But at this moment, Zhou Yan was so serious. Once he was serious, Li Lie would turn his back on him immediately, and all his patience would be in vain.

Li Lie turned his back, pinched his right hand desperately with his left hand, and forced himself to be silent for a while, then, as if he had realized something, he looked at Zhou Yan with a playful smile as usual and replied, "Of course I want to be friends with you, otherwise who I'm always following you if I have nothing to do, and I'm going to make trouble for nothing."

friend?

Zhou Yan chewed these two words carefully. He has no friends since he was a child. Maybe he has classmates at the same table, but these are not friends.

So what should a friend be like?

Not only did he live alone physically for 15 years, he also lived alone mentally for 15 years.

He has been in a difficult state of being afraid of people since he was a child, no one understands him, no one cares about him, all he has is an endless cram school, a scum-like grade ranking, and endless vicious bullying from his mother. rebuke.

If his grades hadn't suddenly improved, he would have been a transparent person forever, and others didn't even bother to remember his name.

What a miserable life.It's like never living.

But there is a little gap in his blunted heart, the name of this gap is the rebellion of youth, he got to the extreme and finally turned into a paranoid temperament, generally ignoring people, if you know each other, you must be deep friendship.

This is not a friend, this is obviously a lover.

It's his own business to be strict with himself, but making friends with others as a lover can only be said to be harmful to others and himself. He thinks that he is already boring enough, and there is no need to bury an irrelevant person with him.

With such a mentality, Zhou Yan said to Li Lie in a very solemn tone, "You have so many friends, I am not missing one of them."

"But you are different!" Li Lie was so anxious that he wanted to get angry.If it weren't for being at school, he would have been unable to hold back the Bawang and forcefully confessed his love to Zhou Yan.

"How am I different?" Zhou Yan asked back.

You are different everywhere!Li Lie's heart was like a howling wind, and thousands of trees fell down, but his face remained motionless, and only in front of Zhou Yan did he have this certainty.

He put his hands behind his head and put a straw in his mouth, and replied grinningly, "You look better than them all."

"Death is not serious!" Zhou Yan blurted out, he wanted to communicate with Li Lie seriously today, and then persuade him to stay away from him. I don't know if he is pretending to be stupid or really stupid.Zhou Yan sighed again in his heart, and vowed secretly: leave him alone, and wait for him to taste the bitter fruit.

The bell for the fourth class had already rang, and there was no one in the stairs and corridors. Zhou Yan said, "I won't talk to you anymore, you can do whatever you like. I'm going back to the classroom now."

As soon as Zhou Yan left, Li Lie pounced on him, gave him a big hug from behind, and whispered in his ear, "Why don't you go to class together? Why are you walking so fast? Don't wait!" wait for me."

Zhou Yan really wanted to take back the sentence "Do as you like", if he let Li Lie go away, Li Lie would definitely use this sentence to scold him... He dragged Li Lie really a bit unlovable It feels like this guy is insisting that Qingshan will not let go of him now, and his skin is too thick to bear to look directly at him.

The fourth class is chemistry class. The chemistry teacher is a very old-fashioned male teacher who wears glasses. He looks at Zhou Yan and Li Lie who are late. It is common for Li Lie to be late, but Zhou Yan is also late today. The whole class couldn't help but sigh.

Zhou Yan didn't call "report", but bowed his head in shame and said to the chemistry teacher who had already taught the class for 10 minutes, "I'm sorry teacher, I'm late, I will stand outside by myself as punishment."

Then Bi Zhouyan took the initiative to stand in the corridor outside, and of course Li Lie followed behind him, happy to stand with him in his heart.

The campus is huge and there are a lot of people in the classroom. There are only a handful of opportunities for him to get along with Zhou Yan alone, so just now he purposely flirted with Zhou Yan, dragged him and provoked him to insist on waiting 10 minutes after the class bell. The two of them hurried to the classroom.

Li Lie touched his head, looked at Zhou Yan embarrassedly and said, "Hey, it's my fault that you are late."

Zhou Yan said, "Of course it's your fault."

This young man's emotional intelligence is worrying, he speaks without euphemism when he sees blood for a while, and doesn't even leave any leeway.

Suddenly, Zhou Yan pursed his lips, with a half-smile, and said to Li Lie, "Actually, I have to thank you too. I think it's pretty good to be punished."

"Wow! Are you so perverted? You like to stand for punishment." Li Lie was a little surprised.

Zhou Yan looked at Li Lie with a complete sweet and wicked smile, and admitted slowly and confidently, "I'm just a pervert, what can you do."

Li Lie naturally put his hand on Zhou Yan's forehead, and asked, "Young master, why are you possessed by something, why do you speak in a strange way?"

Zhou Yan is still smiling, this smile has suppressed his restless nerves that have been suppressed for many years. He used to be obedient to patience. Whether he is happy or sad in front of others, he always has a robotic face, which looks like facial paralysis. After pretending for a long time, he once thought that he was as emotionless as a robot.

But the person in front of him inadvertently stirred his suppressed nerves, he didn't need to pretend in front of him, he could do whatever he wanted, even felt comfortable with schizophrenia like today.

Zhou Yan grabbed Li Lie's hand, regained his shyness, and said softly, "I'm normal, I'm fine." Then there was a firm light in his eyes, and he stared at Li Lie and asked, "Why, Are you scared?"

Depend on!Is this kid provoking me? !Li Lie thought to himself.

Li Lie was docile in front of Zhou Yan, but he was by no means a softie. After seeing Zhou Yan's tip of the iceberg, he became excited. He met Zhou Yan's heavy gaze without fear, grabbed his wrist that touched him just now, On one side of the body, Zhou Yan was pushed against the wall, without speaking, just looking at him with black eyes.

The tree wants to be quiet but the wind keeps blowing, Zhou Yan inadvertently touched Li Lie's heart, the distance between the two of them is getting closer and closer, Li Lie sees that Zhou Yan has not moved, his blood surges up, his face burns into a red cloud , His heart beat, and his lips moved slowly.

This erotic dream came and went quickly, the chemistry teacher yelled and the two separated in embarrassment. When they approached the classroom, the two of them seemed to have lost all souls and were at a loss.

Zhou Yan recovered quickly, and he began to listen carefully and take notes with a straight face.It was only Li Lie who suffered, he endured every inch of his sincerity as if he was walking on thin ice, and every inch of his actions and words had to consider gains and losses.

He thought just now that if he could kiss Zhou Yan, he would confess his love to him immediately and boldly reveal his sincerity. He would bear the responsibility of success or failure. At most, he would end his fantasy dream ahead of time and end up with a heartbroken heart.

Unexpectedly, not only did he fail to kiss him, but his face was flushed and he was embarrassed all over. He lied weakly on the table, really wanting to find a hole to slip in.