[Wen Ye] Hell changes

The sudden rain spread out with a bit of sultry summer atmosphere.Looking from the upper floors of the hospital, the high-rise buildings in the city on the opposite side look precarious in the hazy tree color and the mist of the rain. , looking at the sorrows of summer, lingering silently, annihilated in the boundless beyond.Perhaps it was not long before the summer, and the rain made the weather that had finally warmed up suddenly turn cold again.

The fallen flowers gently floated in front of the window.

Akutagawa Ryunosuke stood by the window with complicated emotions, staring at the pattering rain curtain with some confusion.

He couldn't believe the results of the diagnosis just now.Although his symptoms were exactly the same as the doctor's description.In the past days, he could not have the conditions to see a doctor. Whenever he coughed or had pain, he always just gritted his teeth and endured it, thinking that one day he would make it through. If he continues to fight and can continue to live, he will not be stingy with his cruelty, and will show it to his heart's content.This morning he really couldn't stand the cough, so in order not to affect Dazai Osamu's mood, he still decided to see a doctor.Obviously, it was the first time to seek medical treatment, and it was the first time to try to seek help from others to heal myself, but it was already the last health plan.

At this time, the option of resigning to fate came to his mind.

My lifespan has been judged to be limited.Maybe I can only live for less than a year, and it is even possible that I will suddenly die of illness tomorrow.He was aware of this indistinguishable fact.The current death penalty has been changed to injection of liquid instead of the previous shooting, but it is said that this criminal law will be more terrifying than bullets in some cases. The victim can only sit still and count the time, without knowing it. At any moment, the eyes will be closed forever. The most suffocating way to die is not to turn the earth upside down with a bang, but to die without a trace or breath.

Now my situation is somewhat similar to this death penalty.Akutagawa Ryunosuke thought so.

It may not be a mistake to just resign to fate and wait quietly for the moment of death.Who can say that my choice is wrong?I have no friends, no parents, and maybe no one will want to see what is written on the tombstone after I die.It's just a pity that no one will be sad for my death, and no one will sing mourning songs for me.The mourning song must be sad and beautiful.a little lonely.

Just as Ryunosuke Akutagawa was immersed in sentimentality, a strange voice of inquiry suddenly sounded beside him.

"Can I sit next to you?"

The man asked cautiously, and Akutagawa Ryunosuke found that there was indeed an empty seat next to him, so he stepped back a little, motioning for the man to come and sit.The man had rare emerald green eyes.

"Thank you."

Akutagawa Ryunosuke raised his eyes and nodded, indicating a response, perhaps attracted by the beauty of the green eyes, he couldn't help but bend a thin invisible smile when he nodded, pure and quiet like a dark girl turned upside down by night waves A drop of incense floats.

"I..." He paused for a moment, then shook his head dumbfoundingly, "I thought you were going to commit suicide, you wrote the words "giving up your life" on your face."

"me?"

"Well, but..." Recalling Akutagawa Ryunosuke's smile just now, he grinned again and gave a somewhat exaggerated smile, "It seems that you still have hope of surviving, I was thinking too much. "

Ryunosuke Akutagawa stood in front of the window with scattered flowers, and turned to the man sitting in his seat with some surprise.

"What's wrong, there's something on my face?"

"Did you tell me what you said just now?"

"Of course, is there anyone else here besides you and me?" There was some coquettish accusation in his tone. You gave up your seat to kindly wake you up, seeing that your nature is considered pure, it is a pity to die like this under my nose."

This man's manner of words and deeds is obviously arrogant and self-willed, but surprisingly, it doesn't make people feel disgusted, and even makes people think that he is like a cute child.

Akutagawa came to this conclusion and nodded slightly to him.

"I'm sorry to trouble you."

"This... really heartwarming, why did you react like this? Why did you suddenly apologize? Don't you wonder why I know your physical condition? Not at all?"

"A little bit."

"Your perfunctory appearance, everyone can see that you are not curious at all. If you want to deal with it casually, please pretend to be a little bit."

"I'm not able to perfunctory the past, my strength is limited, I'm really sorry."

"You're an idiot." He glanced at his mouth and muttered, "This is the first time I've seen someone like you...you're an idiot. If I could, I'd like to hear about your life experience. How can you be such an idiot? It's going to be wonderful."

Speaking of this, Akutagawa Ryunosuke also had to start thinking.How did the man in front of me know? This is indeed incredible. At first, I thought maybe he was a doctor, but no matter how he looked, he looked like a childish face of school age, and his clothes didn’t match up with a doctor. The reason why he suddenly spoke to himself was because Wanted to take a seat, but it was a coincidence that they met.How did he know that it was really not possible to see it with a pair of green eyes?

Akutagawa Ryunosuke silently shifted his gaze to the boy's green eyes that gradually opened.

Very nice green.Ryunosuke Akutagawa knew this color.This color symbolizes courage, wisdom, and nobility.

Akutagawa Ryunosuke showed some curiosity at this moment, but did not attract the other party's answer, so he had no choice but to stand still and look at him, and tacitly and without reason continued and deepened this look.

"I can see that you will have an extraordinary life of ups and downs. You can live a long time and do many things." As if he was really watching his fate, he tried his best to narrow his eyes and looked at Akutagawa carefully. "Your future...ends...extraordinary."

"Extraordinary? My kind?"

"Of course, I never predicted that I would miss it. You will definitely become someone who saves the people around you, and even the country."

The man smiled brightly, his pupils were filled with gentle rays of light, and he nodded slightly to Ryunosuke Akutagawa.Akutagawa Ryunosuke saw a little pulsating highlight in the boy's pupils, wandering around to outline the beautiful emerald eye lines, as if a small fish was swimming around in the wonderful eye sockets.

Beautiful and mysterious.Wise and innocent.Compassionate and calm.

Mercy indeed.Akutagawa Ryunosuke felt it.It is not the kind of illusion that is obtained in the sleep state of sinking into a dream and forgetting everything, but it is real here, conveyed to the bone marrow, and the pity and cherishment deposited in the depths of the soul.As a result, the silent gaze at this moment has become extremely dynamic, as if thousands of words have been put into the gaze, and thousands of thoughts have been poured out in the flying eyes.

Akutagawa Ryunosuke hesitated for a long time, and put his right hand on his heart in a daze.

Xia Tian's thin clothes made him feel their beating vaguely.

He didn't dare to believe it, and he had no reason to believe it, but he already had some plans to accept this mercy and throw himself into this wave of cherished warmth.

"Even if you are sick, you can do many things that healthy people can't do. If you live, you may not have the good things you expect, but if you don't live, nothing will happen."

"But even if all the good words are exhausted, the disease cannot be cured, and the doctor said..."

"The doctor said that your body is full of scars, and every organ has different degrees of damage. Now the treatment is already on the brink, and the hope is slim."

"Exactly. As you said."

I had just experienced the other party's ability to see the truth with my own eyes, so now that I was seen again, Akutagawa Ryunosuke would no longer be surprised.Unexpectedly, at this moment, he didn't care about being seen through by this person at all, and he didn't care about being known about all his pain and scars. Instead, he felt a sense of relief as if he was on parole.

It's really amazing.He originally hated being understood by others.

As long as he can remember, everyone around him hates him, and everyone excludes him.Wherever he goes, there will be silence, everyone will stop talking, and will only stare at him with disgust or fear, and after he leaves, they will start to slander him behind his back like a catastrophe.

The cold violence from the outside world, as well as his own aloofness, aloofness, stubbornness and otherness.All of this made him lonely.

He is alone.Also shaped like ashes.

Even entering the port mafia, this phenomenon has not changed.From the beginning to the end, he lived alone, helpless, with nothing but a sad smell of blood and a pair of eyes full of vicissitudes that did not match his age.He was used to it, but that didn't mean he wasn't sad about it.He also cried.He also cried when he was young and didn't understand why he had to live so alone.

At that time, he was unbelievably thin, curled up in the shadows and wept like a black cat that had been abused to the point of death.As long as he stood up and walked forward, it was the day of slavery in Vientiane, but why didn't he dare to take that step towards the light.If you stay where you are, you will have loneliness and tears, but when you go out, you will face even more terrifying crowding out, personal attacks, killing and contention.He felt as if a large number of bullets had been driven into his bone marrow. The pain was so shocking that no scalpel could remove it.At that time, he also wanted to be like this now, and felt that he might as well die.

No one likes him, no one wants him to live in this world, everyone wants to see him die alone in a mess, and everyone wants to kill him.

The sun is dripping and splashing on the ground of the slums, and the debris of the ruins reflects the flame-like light, which is also scattered on the eyebrows and eyes of all kinds of people in the world, delicately tracing the outline of every favored child, dancing and yearning among them.Or maybe it's just that the sun shines with all its might, but it just doesn't fall by his side.

"Don't fall into memories without authorization, and show a sad expression." The man was a little anxious, "This is too disrespectful to me." He pursed his lips, his eyes blinked, and he felt guilty. After waiting for a long time, I looked at Akutagawa and said, "For example, your smile before was very pretty."

"Not good-looking. I look like someone who's been on drugs. Ugly."

"It looks good. I don't allow you to doubt my aesthetics. Ranpo Edogawa's aesthetics ranks first in the country. Of course, if the expression that you want to cry but can't hold back appears on your face, it can be used as ugly. To describe it... that look is really ugly."

This is, of course, a lie, and the detective's inconsistency.

Akutagawa Ryunosuke's smile is very shallow, but it is also full of joy, just like the melting of an iceberg can cause the billowing water to rise and the sea to rise, that tiny but real warmth comes from Akutagawa Ryunosuke's The corners of the lips spread to the center of the eyebrows.

Edogawa Ranpo saw that scene, and he will never forget it for the rest of his life.

The pear blossoms are falling in front of the window, and the people in the blue eyes seem to be far away, like the breeze living in the fragrance of dust in ancient paintings, which is as quiet and full of resentment.Light and dirt infiltrated into the fragrance of dust, and a sweet blood-like fragrance floated silently, dangerous and mysterious, but also so beautiful that it made people nostalgic.

Edogawa Ranpo will never forget this scene for the rest of his life.

"who are you?"

"I, I am a detective who will be famous all over Japan in the future, someone who can see through everything."

"So that's how it is. You really can see through everything... Then you must have seen it. I am a villain, a lackey who works for a criminal organization. Such a person is not worth keeping. Anyway, from the very beginning, I have been I have been preparing for an unsatisfactory end, so I have lived so far."

"I see."

"Being acquainted with such people will have a bad influence on your reputation if you want to reach the top in Japan in the future."

"Fame..." Edogawa Ranpo looked hesitant and thoughtful. After thinking for a few seconds, he answered decisively, "But that has nothing to do with me."

"I only know that you are a terminally ill patient who has suicidal thoughts." He said, "People are all the same in the face of disease. Even the prime minister of the country, the grandpa of the king of heaven, has nothing to do with life and death. In the face of death, no matter who it is, it is just an ordinary person. And I chose to keep you only because I want to choose to respect life."

"respect me?"

"Let's make a promise." He said with a smile to Akutagawa Ryunosuke, "In the future, we must stand out! I will become the number one detective in Japan, and everyone will worship me, and you, too, will become the most important character. The two of us have to go to the end hand in hand, live to the end, and have no regrets until the end."

Listening to Edogawa Ranpo's promise and agreement, Akutagawa Ryunosuke inevitably lowered his head, as if he was afraid of being seen the emotion in his eyes.

Edogawa Ranpo said, respect my life.This life, which has never been cared about by anyone, is being looked up to and respected now.He murmured tremblingly, frowning and staring, a layer of gloom was added under the three-dimensional browbones, adding to the loneliness.

The heaviness of the trauma he had suffered in the past years had knotted knots in the evening light.These knots are twisted in the sorrow of the evening light, his unshed tears and the rustling of the distant white dove's wings.The world he lived in before was like a slaughterhouse, with only ruthless weapons penetrating people's bodies, vigilance and hostility exposed in the air, dirty blood bubbles constantly emerging from corpses, and loneliness that was more terrifying than death.

Suddenly, someone called him, telling him not to leave, to let him live well.

He heard the call.

Cut from the gap between blood and pain, the tender meaning and eloquent heterogeneity of this gentle call shook his body and mind, leading him to a world full of hope and possibility.As a result, the sounds of blood and pain began to disappear in my mind little by little.After the annihilation process was over, he saw a pair of emerald green eyes full of sincerity and beauty beyond words.

It symbolizes courage, wisdom, and nobility.

Under the setting sun, the coldness of the falling rain disappeared into the border of the warm sky, and his inconceivable crying disappeared into the palpitations of his lungs and the painful choking of his throat.

Obviously, I won't be affected by loneliness or illness long ago, but why can't I stop crying?he does not know.Why are you crying before you start to feel sad?He doesn't understand.

Why is this heart, this heart that has already been numb, but now it seems to be empty...

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The author has something to say:

Here is a turning point.I think that a young man in his prime must have made a life choice when he learned that he was terminally ill and would die. According to Akutagawa's life experience and personality, his choice should be relatively negative.The appearance of Ranpo is to save this negativity, otherwise Akutagawa would definitely choose euthanasia early.