this is love

[Mature love, respect and loyalty are not easily expressed, its voice is low, it is humble, retreating, latent, waiting and waiting. — Dickens]

"I have to inquire." Looking at the three of Wu Zhenghao standing in front of him with sad expressions on their faces, Gao Nanshun was more worried that these three guys would not have the patience to persevere, and would hardly be able to go any further than finding a place to work. With a urging mentality, he could only repeat the exhortation feebly: "If you find out, you must persist, please do."

"Do it well." Looking at the three unlucky guys who only knew that they were in trouble, Park Xingxiu was not in the mood to say anything more. After leaving a word, he turned around and took a step, frowning and sighing. Instantly dissipated in the biting wind.

"Let's go together." His eyes followed Park Xingxiu's turn, and Gao Nansun shouted quickly when he saw the back of him leaving straight away, ignoring the remaining three people, turning around and quickly catching up with Park Xingxiu's footsteps.

"Wait for me." Speeding up to Park Xingxiu's side, Gao Nanshun complained slightly dissatisfied, turning his head to look at the person's calm side face, because of his silent reaction, the dissatisfaction in his heart was even greater flourish.Here it goes again, Park Heung-soo's intermittent gender-bending emotions.He couldn't figure out why he was in such a strange state but had to bear it aggrievedly, which made Gao Nanshun feel troubled and at the same time more and more angry.

"What's the matter with you? It's been a strange day." After secretly watching Park Xingxiu for a long time, Gao Nanshun couldn't help asking tentatively, his tone full of doubts and grievances.

"...It's nothing to say." Park Xingxiu's Adam's apple rolled up and down as he glanced at the faces of the people around him, hesitating for a moment and perfunctory in a low voice.He tried his best to concentrate on the road in front of him, but the boredom that was tormenting in his heart continued unabated, making him upset.

Maybe there are some things that cannot be said or concealed.No matter how smiling or indifferent, it is there, and it will not disappear because of willful neglect.

"..." Gao Nanshun narrowed his eyes uncomfortably and bit his lower lip tightly as he looked at his brows that were starting to frown slightly but pretended to be nothing without knowing it.Park Xingxiu is hiding something, something is hiding from him.If he can't even see this, it will be a waste of their deep feelings for so many years.

"Park Xingxiu!" Pretending to be angry and yelling his name, Gao Nanshun simply turned around to face him and walked backwards, his eyes fixed on his eyes, trying to catch clues in his eyes. "What's the matter? Tell me, tell me, huh?" Park Xingxiu's expression obviously changed when he asked the coquettishly coquettish question. Gao Nanshun knew that he had never been able to resist his coquettishness, so he grabbed him even more. The arm shook.

Seeing Gao Nam-soon staring at him inquisitively, Park Xing-su felt dumbfounded.Of course, he has experienced this guy's stubbornness, but at this moment, this kind of pursuit will only make him want to escape even more.

Please let me take a breath too, okay, I'm almost bored to death because of you lately.

"Don't ask if it's okay!" subconsciously yelled out the irritability in his heart, even Pu Xingxiu himself didn't expect it, and the action of pushing Gao Nansun away with both hands could no longer be taken back.It wasn't until he saw the man habitually staggering a few steps backwards that he realized that he wanted to reach out to grab it.

That moment almost made his heart stop.The motorcycle whistling past Gao Nanshun with a harsh horn sound brushed against the man's shoulder and staggered away without any risk.If he hadn't grasped Gao Nanshun's arm tightly and pulled it towards him in an instant, he couldn't imagine the consequences that would not only make him break out in a cold sweat.

Because of the inertia of that strength, Gao Nanshun, who fell headfirst into his arms, obviously hadn't recovered from the series of situations, but was held motionless by him and stood there in a daze.Park Xingxiu's hand holding his arm tightly tightened unconsciously, and the other hand passed through the gap between the schoolbag and the back and hugged his waist with the same force.The violent almost trembling heartbeat has not yet calmed down, and the cold sweat seeping from his back made his scalp numb, and the flickering eyes revealed all the panic, and the shock that everything just happened to Park Xingxiu was beyond description.

Closing his eyes tightly, Park Xingxiu ignored the person in his arms who whispered his name and expressed the protest of his arms being clenched, but stubbornly increased the strength of the hug, almost pushing that person into his chest completely. .

I'm going crazy because of you.do you know?

After a weekend, he still couldn't make up all the late fees. Under the extremely heavy burden, Gao Nanshun tried his best to buy time, and the students again gave him more time to raise the missing part.

Until the physical education class was about to start, Wu Zhenghao's figure did not appear within the school grounds.Looking at the students filing out of the classroom, Gao Nanshun felt helpless and slumped his shoulders.It wasn't until Park Xingxiu, who came out at the end, walked slowly to his side that he turned around and prepared to lock the door of the class.

Byun Ki-duk, Kim Dong-seok, and Kim Dong-suk ran past quickly, shouting excitedly, "Let's play football!", which made him subconsciously look back, and he saw that Park Heung-su also stopped halfway.

football.These two words made Park Xingxiu's feet nailed in place and he couldn't move. He stared at the floor in front of him with the light reflected on the ceiling in a daze. It rushed into my mind, and my heart sank half a meter at that moment.After all, the reality of losing his dream can't make him forget it indifferently. The loss like a scar has always been engraved in his heart, but now it has been covered up by another longing.

He knows what is more important to him.

Turning around to look at the person behind him, only the two of them stood there silently in the silent corridor.Sure enough, he saw Gao Nanshun with his head hanging down, his face full of depression that could not be concealed, and the sad breath of guilt and remorse shrouded him again, this was the last look he wanted to see of him.

"Don't make such an expression." After hearing his words, Gao Nanshun slowly raised his eyelids and met his gaze, "Don't be like this."

I don't want you to be tortured by guilt all the time, and stay by my side like this.

"Oh," looking at Park Heung-soo's eyes that had completely penetrated his heart, Gao Nanshun lowered his eyes and chuckled weakly, and raised his head again to meet his eyes with a bitter smile on his face: "I'm always caught by you See through. To be seen through by you, neither advancing nor retreating."

"Then don't let me see through."

"..."

Turning around and following Park Xingxiu into the class, because the footsteps he stopped also stopped in place, Gao Nanshun stared at the man's back silently, the guilt in his eyes still couldn't be concealed.It is not so easy to let go of the sins of the past. Even if he is happy because of Park Xingxiu's re-acceptance, even if he is satisfied because he is with him again, it is impossible for him to completely forget the things he has done and the mistakes he has made. Not such a heartless person.

"Don't let me see you through." Turning around to look at him again, seeing Gao Nanshun's still depressed mood, Park Xingxiu tried to relax as much as possible, and looked at him with the most genuine smiling expression. "I'm absent from class, you go to class."

Looking at the back of Park Xingxiu walking towards his seat alone, Gao Nanshun couldn't help sighing in his heart, lowered his head but couldn't say anything, then turned around silently and walked out of the classroom.

Leaning sideways on the desk and closing his eyes, Pu Xingxiu wanted to take a nap, but the bitterness in his heart just drove away all the drowsiness. He stood up weakly, looked at the empty classroom, and suddenly felt an unprecedented emptiness for no reason. loneliness.

We still have a long way to go.

After finally waiting for Wu Zhenghao to return to school, unexpectedly, he brought enough money directly to make up for the lack of lateness fee.Thinking of finally solving this tricky matter and being able to relax, he didn't expect to encounter the situation that Shen Huixian's newly bought mobile phone was lost by coincidence.

Standing on the podium with Teacher Jiang and looking around at all the students, Teacher Zheng said helplessly, "Why did this happen again? What should you do?"

"Teacher, it doesn't have to be a classmate in our class." Not wanting to make everyone suspect because of her own affairs, Shen Huixian took the lead in explaining: "I lost it in physical education class just now. It is said that the door was not locked at that time."

Hearing this sentence, Teacher Jiang looked straight at Gao Nanshun's position, and asked suspiciously: "President Gao, what's going on?" The president who was in charge of locking the door didn't lock it, and only he can explain this situation .

Hearing Teacher Jiang's question, Park Xingxiu's heart trembled. During that time, he was the only one who stayed in the classroom, and because he stayed in the classroom, he didn't lock the door. Once this fact was exposed, suspicion would be directed at him.The past that had been dusty for a long time jumped into his mind again, and the punishment brought about by the mistakes he had made hung over his head like the scythe of death, and could be chopped off directly at any time and anywhere.All this terrified him.

"I forgot to lock the door, I'm sorry." After a moment of panic under everyone's gaze, Gao Nanshun tried to calm down and replied as naturally as possible, bypassing the real situation naturally.Sensing the familiar gaze from the right, he quickly turned his gaze over to him. Looking at Park Xingxiu's slightly pale face, he knew that he was suffering from anxiety.

"Okay, it's better if it's not our class." Teacher Zheng immediately believed what he was saying, and patiently persuaded him: "But if you make a mistake in an instant, whoever takes it away should put it back where it was. Everyone knows about lost and found boxes. Where is it? If you put it back today, you won’t be held accountable. It’s not easy, but if you have the courage, you can let go of the guilt and mistakes you’ve left in your life. Do you understand?”

Once the evening self-study was cancelled, everyone packed their things excitedly and left one after another. Byun Kid patted Park Heung-su on the shoulders, bowed deeply pretending to be respectful, and walked away sideways.However, Pu Xingxiu was sitting on the seat and could hardly move. The anxiety in his heart still did not subside, and the premonition that something ominous was about to come brought a trembling depression.

Gao Nanshun, who was also sitting in the same position without moving, was carefully recalling every detail, propping his chin with his hands and staring at the front in a daze, but he didn't have any clue after thinking for a long time.It happened so unexpectedly.

Such a coincidence happened at this time, and the students habitually drew the suspicion to Wu Zhenghao, who had committed crimes many times. Even if they believed that he was not the one who committed the crime, it was difficult for everyone to agree. The trust of Gao Nanshun and the others could not prove it for him. clean.

After school, he called the three of Wu Zhenghao to the garbage disposal room. Gao Nanshun looked at Wu Zhenghao and asked where the money for filling the vacancy of the late fee came from, but Wu Zhenghao, who was dissatisfied with being wronged, said a few words I was speechless.Seeing Wu Zhenghao leave angrily, and Li Zhixun and Li Lijing helpless, Gao Nanshun lowered his eyelids helplessly.

Sensing that the person on the side hadn't spoken for a long time, Gao Nanshun looked at Pu Xingxiu and asked suspiciously, "Why didn't you say anything?"

Staring at the unknown place as if already fascinated, Park Xingxiu didn't move his eyes, but replied lightly, "Didn't you miss it in PE class?" Gao Nanshun, who was even more puzzled by this sentence, frowned and asked Said: "So what?"

"...Yes." Hearing his words, Park Xingxiu stopped his original emotions, turned his head to meet his gaze, and repeated softly with a tone as if mocking himself: "So what."

Looking at Park Xingxiu's side face turned back again, Gao Nanshun faintly felt that he was troubled by something, but he couldn't guess, he focused all his attention on his face, and couldn't find out why, so he had to move away silently. looked away.

In the early morning of the next day, the coldness in the air was still undiminished. Gao Nanshun walked into the gate of the school alone. As soon as he raised his head and looked ahead, he saw two police officers who got off the police car and looked around as they walked into the classroom. Looking at Lou's back, he immediately expected that they came because of the stolen mobile phone in his class. Gao Nanshun didn't expect that this incident would really alarm the police. There are worse situations.

And a few steps behind him, Park Xingxiu stood there looking at the flashing red light on the roof of the police car, his heart seemed to be agitated by the flashing light, his eyes flustered and he didn't know how to calm down.So fast, it all happened so fast.Although he had expected such a day long ago, he was not ready to face such a reality today.

Is this going to be made public?

Teacher Zheng and Teacher Jiang were sitting in the office and before they had time to go to the morning meeting, the original conversation was interrupted by the sudden arrival of the police.The two teachers who also did not expect the matter to develop to such a serious situation were also very surprised, but facing the serious situation, they could only go to the classroom and call out Wu Zhenghao, who is currently the most suspected.

When the students were talking about this incident, the two teachers who walked into the classroom were all silent.Teacher Zheng had just whispered to Wu Zhenghao to go out with her, and when the atmosphere of the whole class was at a stalemate, the police officer who had promised to wait in the corridor opened the front door of the classroom and walked in.

Teacher Jiang immediately greeted her and said in a low voice: "I didn't mean not to enter the classroom..." Before he finished speaking, he was interrupted by the person in front of him: "I'm sorry, teacher. It's not Wu Zhenghao."

"What?" Because of this sentence, the whole class and even the two teachers exchanged glances in bewilderment.

"Confirmed the surveillance video, that classmate came to the school after the physical education class."

Because of his words, Teacher Zheng's heart was finally relieved, but before he had time to relax for a long time, he froze in shock at what the police officer said next: "But there is someone named Pu Xingxiu in this class, right?"

Like a heavy hammer hitting his heart, Park Xingxiu couldn't help shaking his whole body, and his eyes hanging on the table couldn't help shaking. He could feel the eyes of everyone in the class, including the one on the left side. The burning gaze of the man by the window.

"Who is Park Xingxiu? Come out and go to the police station."

Gao Nanshun, whose brain went blank completely because of the shock of the facts in front of him, could only instinctively look at the person sitting not far away.Unknowingly, even his eyes turned red, because this reality was too cruel to Park Xingxiu, and more painful and absurd to him. He seemed to be immersed in a dream and was suddenly shattered by force. His whole body Feel the instant coldness from head to toe.

After hesitating for a moment, Park Xingxiu stood up slowly, as if he had exhausted all his strength just for this, and couldn't help but turned his head to look at the person he cared about the most, and saw that person's shocked and stiff expression.At that moment, the heart seemed to be twisted together, and it started to hurt extremely, and in an instant, his eyes slowly climbed up to the sour and hot touch.

Taking the lead in turning her head to avoid his gaze, Park Xingxiu slowly walked up to the podium, and as soon as she walked around Teacher Jiang, she was grabbed by two police officers with both arms and pulled out of the classroom.

Teacher Jiang tried his best to appease the students, but he couldn't stop the speculations in everyone's mind.Gao Nanshun sat in his seat, as if he could no longer perceive everything, only the panic in his heart was about to break through his eyes and turn into tears.

Before Teacher Jiang left, he quickly got up and ran out of the classroom, standing in the corridor and staring at the door of the consultation room, he knew that Park Xingxiu was inside now.He wanted to rush in and ask him, he had a lot of questions he wanted to ask him, he wanted to protect him tightly behind him so that no one could touch him, he wanted to hold him tight and not let him go to that cold and heartless place, He thought a lot, but he couldn't do anything.He couldn't even take a step forward, so he could only stand alone and tremble uncontrollably, gnawed by the panic in his heart.

It wasn't until he saw Park Xingxiu being dragged out of the consultation room by the police and went straight down the stairs that he reacted and chased him out.Pushing aside the chattering crowd at the entrance of the teaching building, Gao Nanshun quickly ran towards the man who had already approached the police car.

Grabbing Park Heung-su's free other arm and turning his body to himself, Gao Nam-sun fixedly stared at the eyes of the man in front of him, as if trying to grasp his soul through those eyes. "How could it be you?" The cold winter wind blew in his face, and his ears were red from the cold, but none of this affected him. Now he seemed to only see Park Xingxiu alone, and only Park Xingxiu was in his eyes. Can let him alone.

"It's not me." The eyes staring at him were reddened, with tears flickering faintly.Park Xingxiu tried his best to stabilize his trembling jaw and spit out, but still choked with bitterness.

"It wasn't you, why did you say it was you?!" Gao Nanshun couldn't help but raise his voice and shouted out, unable to resist the fear and heartache crazily pouring out of his heart.How do you let him accept this reality?Park Xingxiu, who was as intelligent, outstanding and warm in his mind, is now being taken back to the police station as a suspect by the police for investigation.How could he accept it?

"...Because I didn't live a good life." No longer trying to hide the crying tone, Park Xingxiu couldn't help but choked up her voice, and said slowly while holding Gao Nanshun's gaze tightly.

Unable to understand the meaning of his words at all, Gao Nanshun frowned and looked at him, unable to say a word.

"To play with you, I forgot it for the time being." The tears that blurred his eyes almost fell down in an instant, Park Xingxiu uttered with a trembling voice, as if expressing the bitterest and bitterest past in his heart, The grief overwhelming his head made him unable to say another word, he could only look at Gao Nanshun with a puzzled and panicked expression in front of him with such reluctance.

"Okay, let's go."

Under the urging of the police, Park Xingxiu was pulled to the side of the police car and got into the car.Leaving Gao Nanshun standing alone, unable to move anymore, his eyes were so red that blood could drip, and the tears that flowed in his eyes could fall down in just a second.He stared at the ground where Park Xingxiu had stood before, he no longer had the strength to turn around, and his whole heart was hollowed out, probably like this.

When he was finally able to move, Gao Nanshun turned around slowly, looking at the police car that was gradually going away, he felt that his heart seemed to be left on it, getting farther and farther away from him.Like never getting it back.

Sitting in the back seat of the police car, she couldn't bear it anymore after all, and Park Xingxiu burst into tears.It was as if all those bitter and sad feelings were poured into tears, and the unprecedented sadness made him no longer have time to care about him, so he cried in pain and silently.

Once without you by my side, I lived like a walking dead.

Live like a dead man.

I am no longer as clean and clear as you miss.

But I, like this, have been longing to meet you again.

Only you can save me.

do you understand?