Piano Song Killing Eve [Short Story]

Bleeding indiscriminately.

"Mom, I'm sorry for making you suffer so much..." I hugged my daughter tightly, feeling her tears wet my shoulders, and my tears kept dripping down her back.

The daughter's crying suddenly turned into a small sob, and she seemed to be distracted by something interesting.I looked in the direction of her gaze, and it turned out that she was staring at Situ Lei who was at a loss by the door.

Situ Lei was watched by our mother and daughter at the same time, and he lowered his head in embarrassment. At that moment, I suddenly felt that he was more innocent and helpless than the daughter in my arms.

"Brother..." The daughter suddenly beamed with joy, and stretched out her hand to him, but this kind of address hurt Situ Lei.

"No, Xiaolei, Uncle."

"Uncle!" Xiaolei still stretched out her immature little hand, Situ Lei suddenly became very nervous, and cast a look of help at me.

I smiled and said to him: "Come here, my daughter seems to like you very much."

He was very nervous, and started rubbing the sides of his jeans with his hands that had been hanging down on his sides, and then walked towards us tremblingly.

At first he hesitated slowly, but later he became impatient. He walked up to his daughter and smiled like a child. This situation was very similar to the encounter between childhood sweethearts.

As expected, Situ Lei was very good at coaxing girls. He couldn't speak, but he picked a rose from the bouquet of roses on the bedside table and put it on Xiaolei's head. Xiaolei looked at him and smiled shyly. up.

The daughter was my father's previous lover, and I knew Xiaolei fell in love with him at that moment.

"Hug, uncle!" Xiaolei was a child who recognized her birth, but she opened her arms to Situ Lei who met for the first time.

Situ Lei took a step back in surprise, and turned his helpless eyes to me again, I nodded slightly, feeling tears welling up.

Situ Lei blinked and looked at Xiaolei, his Adam's apple rolled a few times, slowly raised his arms, and hugged Xiaolei in his arms.

"Uncle, do you smoke?" Xiao Lei was hugged by Situ Lei, as if she felt a little regretful, she frowned and looked at me.

But Situ Lei hugged Xiaolei even tighter, and he kept saying with a trembling voice, "I'm sorry, uncle... I'm sorry..."

"Father!" The daughter suddenly looked out the door, and then stretched out her little hand as if asking for help.

I'm alert, Situ Lei, don't embarrass me!

"Come on, Dad hug!" Cheng Ming walked up to Situ Lei and held his daughter's little hand.

My daughter couldn't wait to break free from Situ Lei. At that moment, I saw Situ Lei's eyes were red with envy and nostalgia. He turned his back and wiped his face.

"Who is he?" Cheng Ming asked me.

"Oh, he...his name is Situ Lei, and he donated his liver for Xiaolei."

"Oh, great benefactor!" Cheng Ming walked up to Situ Lei with his daughter in his arms, and stretched out his right hand.

Situ Lei's performance was unexpectedly sensible and decent. He didn't play tricks or lose control. Instead, he shook Cheng Ming's hand, smiled lightly and shook his head.

Three days later, I went to get the test report, but was told that Situ Lei had already taken it.

I looked for him everywhere, and finally saw him standing beside my daughter's hospital bed, silently looking at her sleeping daughter.He didn't notice my approach until I walked up to him and stared at his profile.

"Hey, what's wrong with you?"

When I asked him this question, he shivered.

"Oh, nothing, I want to see her."

"Is there something wrong with the test results?" I felt Situ Lei's obvious uneasiness.

"No! What's the problem? I'm her..." Situ Lei pretended to be relaxed, but stopped talking.

"No...no problem." He added in a low voice, then looked at his daughter in a daze, and said, as if talking to himself, "It's all my fault. There is no limit to smoking and drinking."

His daughter's illness was congenital, and his constitution at the time was of course an inducement.But I found that after he said this, his face became pale and solemn, and there was a look of fear in his eyes. What was he worried about?

"Situ Lei, are you scared? Have you repented? You...don't let me down again!" I grabbed his sleeve and shook it vigorously.

"No! You..." He tightly held my hand that was pulling his sleeve, and his hand was actually colder than mine.

We didn't talk anymore because I couldn't read his eyes.

After a long time, he said quietly, "Have I...have let you down all this time?"

07

Situ Lei's black shirt and jeans set off his tall and handsome figure and blended into the city's feasting and feasting.

He found a slow shake bar, sat in front of the bar, ordered a glass of whiskey, but swung the glass back and forth like a game, watching the blending of the drink and the ice cubes.

"Sir, is there something wrong with our wine?" the guy at the bar asked.

"Oh, no, I..." Situ Lei smiled self-deprecatingly, and asked back, "Little brother, tell me, when you are upset, what else can you do if you don't drink?"

"Well... I'm looking for a woman!" The younger brother laughed jokingly.

"Hmph, thank you for your advice." Situ Lei also echoed with a smile.

His eyes were a little blurred, he was not drunk but a little bit drunk, he looked at the dance floor, but he was lost in his own thoughts.

The light shone on his face, making his dark eyes shine brightly.He licked his dry lips, and stroked the stubble that he had grown due to negligence in the past few days. He inadvertently found a few beauties staring at him and talking, and immediately looked away.

He is like looking at the territory under his feet after conquering a city, looking at those who are having fun or remembering and healing people. The frivolity and provocation in him no longer exist, but the loneliness and vicissitudes are still irresistible.

"Uncle, I'm broken in love, can you buy me a glass of wine?" A beautiful girl walked up to Situ Lei, put her arms around his shoulders, and said coquettishly.

Situ Lei took off the jade arm hanging around his neck, and impatiently moved his wine glass towards the girl.

The girl looked at the wine glass hesitantly, then at Situ Lei, who had been lowering his head in thought, and asked timidly, "Uncle, there won't be... drugging here, right?"

Situ Lei finally raised his head, looked at the girl with dazed eyes, then raised one corner of his mouth, and said with a sneer, "Do I need to do such a thing?"

The confidence and free-spirited exuded between frowns and smiles fascinated the little girl.

"Wow, Ouba, so sexy!" As she spoke, the girl took out her phone, and while Situ Lei wasn't paying attention, she put her face close to her and took a group photo.

"Hey!" Situ Lei reached out to snatch the phone, but the girl quickly pressed a few buttons and said with a mischievous smile, "It's been posted on Weibo!"

"Delete it soon!" Situ Lei was angry.

But the girl was still interested, she drank Situlei's wine in one gulp, and then said coquettishly: "Use wine to relieve your worries and worry more, it's right to find a beautiful woman, Ouba, my name is Xiaoxian." , she pressed her hands together on her right cheek, pouted and looked at Situ Lei.

"Little girl, you'd better go home quickly, you can't afford the things I play."

"Who said I can't afford it, you...you underestimate me!" The girl stamped her feet in protest.

At this time, a chubby boy with a sloppy face rushed over with five boys of his age.

"Xiaoxian!" The boy roared, and the girl shivered and hid behind Situ Lei.

The boy stopped in front of Situ Lei, squinted his eyes and looked at him, and then said frivolously, "It's you, you old face, who dares to snatch my wife!" He raised his fist as he spoke.

Situ Lei didn't even look at him, but turned around and asked the girl, "Is your boyfriend?"

"It was just now, but it's not now!" The girl proudly took Situ Lei's arm and said to the boy, "You saw my Weibo, I announce that he is my new boyfriend!"

"You..." The boy pointed at the girl and gritted his teeth, but he couldn't hinder the girl's self-willedness, so he turned his anger on Situ Lei, "You dare to cheat on me, I'll fuck you up!"

"Little friend, she said it alone, and I don't agree with it." Situ Lei slapped a red banknote on the table, then got up and walked out.

"Wow, so stylish!" The girl followed, but the boy grabbed her slender arm.

"It hurts!"

"You fucking nympho, you!"

"So what if you're a nymphomaniac, you can make me crazy too!"

"you……"

"You can hang shoulders with other women, so I can't date a handsome uncle?"

"I see you like to ignore me, why don't I find some spare tires?"

"asshole!"

Listening to the quarrel between the two behind him, Situ Lei suddenly stopped in his tracks, and the group of young people were stunned, not knowing what he was going to do.

He turned around and asked the boy, "Boy, what's your name?"

"I... My name is Sanqi, what's the matter?" The boy obviously lacked confidence.

"Sanqi, let me remind you that women can worry about gains and losses, but men can't. You can either focus on it or let it go completely, otherwise, one day you will definitely regret it."

"Ouba, you're so manly, I'm going to cry!" Xiaoxian hugged her head again like a nympho.

"What the hell are you doing here? I'll remind you today that messing with your Seventh Grandpa is courting death!"

In order to save face in front of his girlfriend, the boy raised his fist at Situ Lei, but Situ Lei strangled his wrist.

"I don't want to fight anymore."

"Don't want to? Who told you not to play! Brothers, go!"

Several people besieged together, recruiting fiercely. When Situ Lei was fighting in groups, these children hadn't developed yet.But Situ Lei had some scruples, he just dodged and didn't attack, and kept retreating outside the bar.

"Hit him, Ouba, hit him!" Xiaoxian had completely lost his position.

Sanqi also became more and more angry, he was so determined that Situ Lei didn't dare to fight back, and became more and more unscrupulous.

"Listen to me, I don't want to get involved, I have important things to do!" Situ Lei yelled like a beast, and the children were so frightened that they stopped moving and didn't dare to go forward.

Situ Lei straightened his clothes, then turned and left.

At this time, Sanqi suddenly grabbed a wine bottle and threw it at Situ Lei's head.

Situ Lei tried hard to identify the direction, but still felt as if someone had blindfolded her eyes with gauze, and the noise around her ears seemed to be muffled by a thick layer of tympanic membranes, while her breathing and footsteps became more and more clear.

He felt a liquid gushing out of his head, smelly and sticky, his feet tripped together again, and he fell to the ground.

According to Xiaoxian's recollection, before losing consciousness, Situ Lei suddenly smiled strangely, and murmured, "I'm dead...and also your...first kiss."

***

Trembling, I walked towards the emergency room. The sound of my footsteps was heard far away in the silent corridor in the middle of the night. I cursed over and over again in my heart: Situ Lei, you bastard, if you die now, I will never die. forgive you!

From a distance, the boy and girl who caused the trouble could be heard arguing, and they stopped arguing when they saw me approaching like a lost soul.The girl's pear blossoms were raining, and the boy apologized repeatedly.

"Sister, yes... I'm sorry, I've hit hard..."

"Where is he?" I asked in a trembling voice.

The two children looked at each other, and the boy said guiltily, "Brother, he's already...it's me...hey, it's all my fault!" The boy held his head and knelt down remorsefully.

I felt like I was about to faint when my legs gave way, but fortunately, Xiaoxian held me up.My eyes were blurred by tears, I couldn't tell the direction, and turned around in the corridor.

"Sister, sister, don't do this!"

"He... Where is he? Doctor!" In order to cover up my crying, I raised my voice to the loudest. I want to divert the grief of not seeing Situ Lei again, and I also want to think about Xiaolei, "Doctor Hurry up, take out his liver and save it, it's not too late!"

"Ah? So ruthless?" Xiaoxian seemed to be frightened, and let go of the hand that had been holding my arm.

"Ah—it hurts me to death!" The voice rushed out of a room, piercing through the night and reaching the sky, with a low tone mixed in the voice.

I was dumbfounded.

"Ah! Ah!" It sounded so much like Situ Lei.

"Don't...don't be nervous, it's my first time too, you...you relax, take a deep breath, take a deep breath!"

"Hu-hu-"

"Yes, take a deep breath, soon, soon!"

"You just said it was fast, it hurts so much after so long! It hurts me to take a deep breath! Ah, help!"

It sounds so much like Situ Lei giving birth!

"Nurse, sister, if you don't take it lightly, I won't like you anymore!"

"You... If you shout again, I'll sew your mouth shut first!"

I looked at Xiaoxian and Sanqi with surprised eyes, and they explained the matter clearly.

Situ Lei did not die, but a long cut was made on the back of his head. Before the nurse prepared to suture, he informed him of all the potential risks with a routine formula. One of them was that the anesthesia might affect his IQ, but it was only one in a thousand. However, Situ Lei resolutely refused the anesthesia.

"When I said he was 'already', I meant he had already gone for stitches, hehe." Sanqi said to me.

"The first time the nurse said, it was the first time she sewed up someone who did not receive anesthesia, hehe." Xiaoxian said to me.

"Then why isn't he anesthetized?" I asked.

"Nonsense, if I become stupid, who will ask you to play hooligans! Oh, my... Yuan Fatty, what the hell did you just say? You think I'm dead, right? You... you wait - take it easy Oh girl! How can I teach you a lesson when I come out!"

"Ouch, I'm so scared, nurse, you need to tie it harder!" I burst out laughing, Situ Lei seemed to be fine.

08

Situ Lei's life turned upside down.

He has a regular and healthy schedule, goes for a run every morning, never smokes or drinks, and eats like a confinement child.

Although he didn't say it, everyone knew that he wanted to give his daughter a healthy liver.

Finally, the day of surgery is approaching, and my worries have risen to the point where it cannot be added.

I checked with the doctor over and over again whether my daughter's condition was suitable for surgery, and I stayed close to her so that she wouldn't think about it when she was alone.

The doctor said that the daughter's blood type inventory is sufficient for normal surgery supply. If anything goes wrong, there is Situ Lei, a human blood bank, that can transfuse her daughter.

But I always feel uneasy and flustered badly.Could it be because of Situ Lei?Knowing him for so long, he always feels like an uncertain factor to me.

The night before the operation, my daughter went to bed very early, but I couldn't fall asleep. The more worried I was, the more afraid I would be alone, so I wanted to talk to Situ Lei.

He also followed the doctor's arrangement and was admitted to the hospital for some adjustments to ensure the quality of the donor.

He wasn't in the ward, I found him in the playroom.

He was wearing a hospital gown, sitting alone at the end of the row of chairs, staring down at the mobile phone in his palm.

He shaved his beard, but because he hadn't had a haircut for a long time, his long bangs fell to his forehead, covering his eyes. I only saw his delicate chin, straight nose bridge, and constantly moving lips.

The dim light cast mottled shadows on his body, and I saw crystal drops of water dripping down from the bangs covering his eyes from time to time.

Should I bother him?

"Haven't you gone to bed yet?" I couldn't help but speak.

Situ Lei rubbed his eyes in a panic, then smiled and said to me: "Scare me, I... I'm watching a horror movie." He straightened his back naturally.

I walked up to him, sat in the same seat in front of him, and turned sideways to chat with him.

"I don't know what's wrong, my heart is always not at ease."

"Don't worry, I'm here!" Situ Lei straightened his body.

But I looked at him with resentful eyes.

It is because of you that I am not at ease! ——The meaning of this sentence has been expressed from my eyes, although it is not intentional.

Situ Lei's smile became very bitter, and we remained silent like this.

After a long time, he suddenly asked me: "Yuan Zhen, do you know how terrible loneliness is?"

"Lonely?"

I thought I could say something, but found that I have no insight in this area. Although my life has many unsatisfactory things, I am not alone. I have parents, husband and children, and one or two close friends. I know the horror of being alone.

"Do you know when you're the loneliest?" he asked me again.

I am silent.

"From childhood to adulthood, the people I cherish will not spend too long with me, my mother, my father, and..." Situ Lei raised his eyes, looked at me for a moment and then moved away. He opened his eyes, "And those girls."

"I have a lot of friends, what they do, I immediately learn to do it, because I am afraid of being excluded by them.

"There are also women. When I was three years old, my mother left. I yearned for a woman's life. I wanted to be taken care of by women, so I was willing to do anything that pleased women. But no woman would Always by my side."

"There may be women like that, but you scare them away." I pretended to be joking, but was actually protesting.

After hearing this, Situ Lei smiled self-deprecatingly.

"I do it the way they want, but in turn they see it as indecent and frivolous, and my appearance is unreliable, right?

"My girlfriends don't believe me. If I make a mistake, they will suspect that I have changed my mind, and then they will leave after a few arguments, but I feel like I have been hollowed out by myself.

"So I surround myself with as many girls who like me as I can. I've never been in two boats. I just want to make sure that when one girlfriend leaves, I can find another right away..."

"Hmph, your explanation of Huaxin is really novel."

I was sneering and sarcastic, thinking of his previous insolent behaviors and behavior patterns dictated by his temperament, he seemed to have some difficulties when he said that, how can a person who is consistent to the end still live?

What made it even more unbearable for me was that he took every bite of "theirs", but I, this woman, was obviously not among his "theirs"!

"I...I'm not..." Situ Lei was a little anxious, but seeing my merciless indifference, he gave up explaining, "That's right, every woman wants different things, I think every woman wants something different. To please, to change back and forth, what is it if it’s not a playful heart?”

"Hmph, rest well, we will depend on you tomorrow." I wanted to stand up, but Situ Lei continued to speak as if he didn't hear me.

"I don't want to be alone, so I go to discos, I go to bars, I go to places where there are a lot of people.

"But when I'm sick, or in a bad mood, and don't want to drink or dance, and just want someone to pay, there's no one, and I can't find that person.

"I was lying on the bed, looking at the ceiling, with a high fever of [-] degrees, and I didn't even have the energy to drink a glass of water. At that time, I really wanted to die."

I suddenly felt something sharp pierce my heart.

"Also, when you go home alone in the coldest and darkest night, and walk into the rented room, no one will talk to you again, that kind of despair...

"I would think, I'm not as good as those who died in the arms of their relatives. Although they lost their lives, there will still be people who are sad for him and miss him. When I die? I must be lying on the bed alone. I can't cry out because of the discomfort, my senses and consciousness are slowly disappearing, and my body is gradually losing heat..."

"Stop talking!" I'm not used to such a serious Situ Lei, I want to get angry with him, see him play a scoundrel, no matter what, I don't want to pity him.

"You're scared, right?" I looked at him sharply.

I hoped to provoke him, but instead of being angry, he said eagerly and sincerely with tears in his eyes: "I'm afraid, I'm afraid I won't be able to save our daughter!"

Suddenly I lost the ability to breathe, and I felt dizzy, but I couldn't take my eyes off him.He finally spoke out.

"Daughter? Our daughter? Who is your daughter?" I deliberately said in a cold voice, "You don't have to worry. If you can save her tomorrow, you can save her. If you can't, just pretend that I killed her eight years ago. , you hoped so too.”

"No! No!" Situ Lei leaned forward suddenly, clutching the back of my chair tightly, his lips trembled violently, and a few tears dripped down majestically, "You...you don't..."

Seeing that I was still indifferent, he lowered his head in despair, pressed his forehead against the back of my chair, and choked up repeatedly: "You...don't say it, don't say it..."

When did Situ Lei become so fragile? He cried like a child.

Memories unfolded in front of my eyes frame by frame like a movie, and my tears couldn't stop. I reached out and wanted to stroke his thick hair.

However, I suddenly remembered the despair and helplessness in my heart when I was lying on the cold operating table, waiting for the artificial abortion operation. Compared with this feeling, the pain that Situ Lei just mentioned was nothing but moaning.

So the hand that only wanted to comfort him withdrew again.

"I'm going to sleep, thank you in advance." This was the most indifferent voice in my life, and I sent it to Situ Lei, who was obviously out of order.

I stood up and walked out the door. When I was almost at the door, Situ Lei said to me behind me: "Yuan Zhen, if there is any accident tomorrow, even if I drain my blood and give her the whole liver, I will... Also..."

He tried his best to suppress it, but he still choked up a few times, "I want to save... your daughter."

I looked back at him, and he returned to the way he was before I disturbed him, with his body bent and his head lowered, his bangs covering his eyes, but he didn't pick up his phone again.

I remembered that a few days ago, he refused to take anesthesia because he was afraid of the one-thousandth possibility of becoming an idiot. He must be afraid of tomorrow's transplant operation, afraid of the extremely small risk that the doctor told him?

So the vicious words slipped out of his mouth again: "Don't worry, I will do it if you don't tell me."

After finishing speaking, I left him and walked out of the activity room.

***

The day of the operation was May NO.15, the weather was very warm, and it felt like summer.

I mechanically signed all the documents that required me to sign, and then I never left my daughter's side.

I leaned against my daughter's bicycle and followed her until she was wheeled into the operating room.

I knew that Situ Lei's bicycle was following behind, but I lowered my head, not looking at Situ Lei who was lying on it.

I don't know what it means when he looks at me, but I really don't have the courage to look at him.

In my heart, he is a man who is ungrateful and ungrateful and dare not take responsibility. I am afraid that if I look away suddenly, I will find other things on his face, such as fragility, fear, and reluctance.

The first two hours were peaceful, but the time outside the operating room seemed to be frozen. In the sunlight and the fragrance of flowers in May, it slowly thawed and passed slowly. Although it was slow and difficult, it did not involve too much heartbeat.

Suddenly the door of the operating room opened and closed frequently. I saw the nurses and doctors coming in and out all looking panic-stricken. I held onto Cheng Ming's hand tightly and wanted him to tell me what was going on, but he could only Reassured me over and over "don't worry" because no one knew what was going on.

I couldn't bear it any longer, and wanted to grab a nurse to ask for clarification, but I didn't need to bother at all. The nurse held a clipboard with a few documents on it, walked up to me and Cheng Ming, took off the mask, Urgently ask us who is in charge.

Of course it is me!

"What about the donor?" the nurse asked.

"Ah?" Cheng Ming and I looked at each other in blank dismay.

"His name is Situ Lei, right?" The nurse flipped through the documents in her hand.

"Uh, yes." I replied dully.

"He has chronic alcoholic cirrhosis. He had just removed a quarter of his healthy liver and prepared to transplant it to the recipient. Most of the remaining liver was diseased. This was something doctors hadn't thought of before."

"What?" I staggered backwards and fell into Cheng Ming's arms.

The sudden change was unbearable for me, and my helplessness turned into intense anger. I yelled at the nurse: "Didn't think of it? Can you take human life as a joke if you didn't think of it?"

The nurse frowned, showing a dissatisfied expression, and asked, "Isn't it agreed in advance? Situ Lei himself wrote the guarantee."

"What... what guarantee letter?"

The nurse did not answer me, but said impatiently: "The donor is now showing symptoms of severe liver failure and needs massive blood transfusions. His blood is very rare. The matched blood from the blood bank can only be used by the recipient to continue the operation. Hurry up with the donor." The family members discuss which one to save.”

The nurse's professional and calm tone brought the most unbearable panic to a family.

"What should I do? What should I do?" I cried in Cheng Ming's arms like crazy.

"Zhenzi, listen to me," Cheng Ming's voice was heavy and calm, "Situ Lei came to me, he told me everything about you, and he also told me, if this time really comes, let me I must advise you..."

I thought of what Situ Lei said to me last night.

"No! How could I do it!" I cried loudly and beat Cheng Ming's chest hard.

"Hurry up and decide, what about the donor's family?" the nurse urged.

"He...he has no family." Cheng Ming choked up in a low voice.

"Doesn't he have a father?" I tugged at Cheng Ming's sleeve and asked him with wide eyes.

"His father died in prison eight years ago."

In an instant, I felt that the whole world was collapsing, and a 16-year-old Situ Lei was smirking at me in front of my eyes. How I wished I could stretch out my hands and pull that boy back to my side.

In the confusion of consciousness, I looked at the 16-year-old boy, his smirk gradually became bitter, and this bitter smile gradually changed into the way Situ Lei looked at me and wept last night, and then Situ Lei was crying But he laughed again, squeezed his eyes at me, then turned around and walked towards the darkness behind him.

With trembling hands, Cheng Ming took out the letter of guarantee written by Situ Lei himself from his pocket.

[I know that I suffer from chronic alcoholic liver cirrhosis, and I express my willingness to accept Cheng Ailei’s liver transplant operation in an absolutely sober state. I am willing to bear all the consequences of the operation and will not hold anyone or any liability of any organization. ]

No wonder Situ Lei seemed to be a different person from the day he got back the test report. He bore all the fear and uneasiness by himself, but I treated him so cruelly on the night when he was waiting to die.

I had no strength left, so I could only let the tears flow from my eyes. I sat on the bench in the corridor of the hospital and looked at the red light bulb in front of the operating room. The red light from there was like the eyes of a monster, staring at me ferociously.

I suddenly thought, is Situ Lei still conscious now, would he feel scared?If he is afraid, how can I comfort him?

I can't comfort him, there's nothing I can do.

Cheng Ming took care of everything after that.The doctor told him that they will help Cheng Ailei, and they will try their best to obtain blood bank resources. If the blood source can be found within two hours, Situ Lei may be saved.

An hour later, the daughter was pushed out of the operating room.

I looked at her little face sleeping peacefully, and felt better at last. I thank God for placing a miracle on my daughter, but I also hope that God will be more kind and create another miracle for Situ Lei.

Xiaoxian and Sanqi rushed over, they didn't know each other, and they had become good friends with Situ Lei.They asked about Situ Lei's situation, and Cheng Ming told them the two-hour deadline.

"Oh, two hours, there is still hope!" Xiaoxian said and made a prayer.

"Yes...it was two hours before an hour and a half." Cheng Ming stammered.

"Ah?" Xiaoxian burst into tears after hearing this.

And I can only kneel on the ground, put my elbows on the bench, put my palms together against my forehead, and pray silently.

I sincerely pray that God will save him and give me another miracle.

I am willing to exchange my life, because I have only now clearly realized that I never hated him.

From the first time I saw him, I fell in love with him. This love became stronger and stronger as the years passed. Until last night, his words, his tears, his Helplessness, his panic, completely purified this love, washed away the layer of indifference disguised by my pain and self-esteem, it was just love, pure love.

But I can't do anything but pray, I can't share anything for him, then and now.

Later, when everyone was in despair, the doctor removed complex and sophisticated instruments from Situ Lei's body, leaving only an oxygen tube.

I sat by his bed and looked at him, silently waiting for the moment of farewell. The handsome face in my impression was always full of energy and bluffing, but at this moment it was as quiet as a sleeping baby.

Last night, after I left, he wrote a letter and gave it to Xiaoxian and Sanqi. He asked them to keep it temporarily. If he died, he would give the letter to me. If he survived, He tore up the letter.

Xiaoxian handed the letter to me, thick letter paper, is it full of what Situ Lei wants to say to me?

But I didn't want to read a word. I stubbornly thought that as long as I didn't read the letter, Situ Lei wouldn't die.

I want him to open his eyes, reach out and grab the letter and tear it off.

"Situ Lei, I want to read your letter." I whispered in his ear.

"No, no, I will be shy!" The voice of a 16-year-old boy echoed in his mind, but he still lay quietly, ignoring me.

He is so cruel.

I said a lot of words to him, words of regret, words of complaint, words of gratitude, words of love, although he will not respond to me, but I think he can hear me, and he can feel that I am beside him.I want to be with him.

"I don't want to be alone."

I don't want to leave you alone.

i want to love you.

If you give me another chance, I will love you very much.

Time, tick, tick...

09

Yuan Zhen:

When you read this letter, I should no longer be in this world. It seems that I really have nothing to do with luck.

Thank you for making the right decision and at least letting me do something for Xiaolei.

You are a kind girl, even if it is a scum like me who died, you will feel a little sad, right?To be selfish, I feel a little better now when I think that someone will feel sorry for me.

It is also because of selfishness that I am writing this letter.

I should have hidden everything in my heart and disappeared with me forever, but when I think that no one really understands my heart in this life, I feel very sad. People are fragile when they are waiting for the end of life, so , please forgive me one more time.

I'm not trying to defend myself, and I don't expect me to change your bad impression of me. I just want to tell you a few passages of my life.

All along, no one has established a real and stable relationship with me. I don't think my disappearance will have too much impact on others, so I always thought that death was nothing to be afraid of.

But tonight, sitting alone in the activity room, letting my time go by slowly, I realized that I was actually afraid of death.

I'm afraid of being isolated and forgotten, I'm afraid I'll never see you and Xiaolei again, really, it's not just rhetoric, I'm really afraid.

There are many photos of you in my mobile phone, all of which were secretly taken when you were not paying attention. I also secretly took many photos of Xiaolei.

I look one by one, I wish people really have a soul after death, then my soul will stay with you, even if I can't do anything, even if no one realizes my existence, as long as I can look at you like this , then death is nothing to be afraid of.

You know the gratitude I feel when you sit down next to me?So I couldn't restrain myself, and said a lot of things I shouldn't have said. I could have been alone with you, but I ruined them all.

I made you angry again, every word you said pierced my heart like a knife, but I asked for it myself, I can't blame others.

I should also be thankful that my loss of control did not soften your heart, only in this way can Xiaolei be saved, and this letter of mine will be read by you.

Yes, I should be thankful.

I have written so much, but I haven't gotten to the point, you