Don't come here, I'm just an actor

Back in the capital, I looked at myself in the mirror, and I was skinny.It's been a long time since I had a good night's sleep. I saw a psychiatrist and prescribed medicine, but I didn't take it when I got home, for fear of being discovered by them. I didn't even tell Pan Bing about it.

After taking the medicine to go to bed, lying on the bed, my mind was in a mess, and many things flashed through my mind over and over again like a slideshow.

I force myself to sleep, but I can't fall asleep.Turn on the bedside lamp, light a cigarette, and the smell of smoke fills the nose.It feels like it's been a long time, but it seems to be so close.Park Hyun-song's face appeared in front of me every night, and I couldn't forget it if I wanted to.

It has been 150, six days and seventeen hours since the last meeting in the hospital.I wanted to forget this man crazily, but I just couldn't.He seems to be engraved into my blood, and every time I want to remove it, it is painful to dig out the flesh and bones.

I took out a bottle of red wine from the wine cabinet. On the days when I couldn’t sleep, alcohol paralyzed my nerves. When I was drunk, I fell asleep, so I didn’t think about what I couldn’t think about.

Sitting on the floor of the living room, leaning against the sofa, sip after sip from the bottle, what I drink is not red wine, but bit by bit miss, a knife wound.It's late at night, is he asleep?Say "good night" silently every night, but I can't tell if it's for myself or someone else.I haven't had time to tell you, "Good night" means that I love you and love you, so I don't need to tell you now.

One bottle wasn't enough and another bottle was needed, the drinker didn't know where he was, but he still called Park Xiansong's name in his heart.Why do you make me hate you after falling in love with you, everything is you, no matter what! ! !

I raised my hand to support the coffee table and wanted to get up, but accidentally touched the wine bottle on the table, and it fell to the ground and shattered into pieces. I picked up a piece and remembered the pain when I stepped on it.

I scratched lightly on my arm, blood oozes out, the pain made me wake up for a while, and I forgot about Park Xiansong.This feeling is very novel. I couldn't help but draw another stroke. There was more blood left. I could feel my body getting colder after the blood was lost. Is this the feeling of slowly losing life?Very exciting, very exciting.Excitedly, I scratched a few more times, and the blood flowed to my hand. I just watched the blood drip across my fingers and onto the floor.It's time to be free, it's time to be free, it's over.

"Xiaodong, don't sleep, hold on, and you'll be in the hospital soon." It was Park Xiansong's voice, and it was the familiar smell of perfume on his body.But I'm so sleepy, I can't help but want to close my eyes and have a rest, I don't want to see Park Xiansong.

"Hey, don't sleep, talk to me, you can scold me however you want, don't sleep, I beg you!" Park Xiansong roared in my ear, is the trembling voice crying?

I wanted him to stop making noise, but I couldn't open my mouth, my face was slapped by him, I was really willing to do it.

I finally fell asleep. There was a beautiful road in my dream, and the fragrance of flowers was tangy.I walked forward, and someone behind me kept calling my name.I turned my head to look, but there was no one behind me.Continue to go forward, the front is getting brighter and brighter, so that I can't open my eyes.The yelling behind him grew louder, and it was already a little ear-piercing.I closed my eyes and covered my ears, but I still couldn't avoid the voice, who the hell is it! ?I yelled to stop screaming, but the voice still echoed in my ears, suddenly my feet were empty, I opened my eyes, the white ceiling, the pungent smell of disinfectant, I was in the hospital again.

"Xiaodong, you're awake! How do you feel?" This familiar voice turned out to be Park Xiansong before he lost consciousness.

"Why are you here?" My voice was a little dry and hoarse.

"Don't talk, drink some water to moisten your throat." Park Xiansong helped me to drink a few sips of water.

"You took medicine and drank so much alcohol, the doctor washed your stomach."

I ignored him, wanted to get up, and raised my left hand, the guy was really tight.

"The one on your hand is more serious. If you find out too late, the consequences will be disastrous. Just lie down and rest and don't move, okay?" Park Xiansong carefully put my left hand back on the hospital bed.

I didn't have the strength to break up with him, "Where's Brother Pan?" "There's something wrong with the studio, he's going back first, I'll take care of you here."

I secretly rolled my eyes, who asked you to take care of it?

"You go, I'll call Brother Pan and ask him to find me a nurse." I don't want to stay in the same space with him.

"Xiaodong, just let me take care of you, okay? I'll just sit here, call me if you need it, and I won't take the initiative to harass you, okay?" Park Xiansong said so pitifully, as if I was heinous.I felt dizzy and uncomfortable, and I didn't want to bother to discuss it with him. I'll wait until Pan Bing comes.

After waiting until night, Pan Bing came in a hurry, "Okay, Brother Pan is here, you go back, thank you for taking care of me for a day." The two of us stayed in the same space for a day, which made me very uncomfortable. Uncomfortable and uncomfortable.

"Don't." Pan Bing stopped me directly, "I just stopped by to see you, and I have to go back to work, let him stay and take care of you first."

I glared at Pan Bing, "Just find me a nurse."

"If you don't find a nurse at this point, you just lie down. I'm still busy with two days' work, so I'll go first." After speaking, he hurriedly left.

The room was quiet, I closed my eyes and pretended to rest, Park Xiansong's sense of presence was too strong, and I couldn't ignore it no matter what.

"Xiaodong, I have already contacted Kaichen, and he will be here tomorrow."

"I don't need it, and I won't see him when he comes. Go back, I can do it myself."

"Xiaodong, you can blame me all you want, but you have to see a doctor."

What Park Hyun-song said made me furious. "I'm not sick! What's wrong with me! The accident happened when I was drunk and unconscious, but what's the matter with you? We've already broken up!"

"Then what happened to those medicine bottles on your table? How long have you been in this state? Why didn't even Pan Bing tell you?"

"You ask me? Then I can only say thanks to you." This sentence hurt Park Xiansong severely. His eyes were scarlet, his fists were clenched, and his body began to tremble.

I don't want to see him like this, he just needs to leave, and me and him don't have to be so tense.

"Xiaodong, at the beginning, I did some things wrong, but I never got involved with others when I was with you." Park Xiansong choked up, "The company is my painstaking effort, and it is my responsibility when I face my family. I have confidence, so I can't give up easily. But I swear, I have never done anything to be sorry for you except for my work contact with him. And I have quit step by step more than a year ago, all my focus They have all been transferred to the country.”

"Then why do you sit and eat together?" Is this not involved?

"Matthew and I met when we were in college. When we were in good relationship, we started the company together. We were together well, but my mother found him and gave him a sum of money to let him leave me. He and I said this, and I had a big fight with my family, and the result was that my dad wanted to bring down the company and let me quit. It was such a difficult time, I gritted my teeth, and Matthew first compromised , promise to only get along as friends."

Park Xiansong was silent for a while. At that time, he firmly wanted to be with the one he loved, but he didn't expect the other party to compromise. The young and energetic him must be very uncomfortable.

"Later, the company got on the right track, and Matthew and I got along as partners. The family saw that we were no longer together, so we didn't get involved. I worked hard so that I wouldn't be at the mercy of my family. I wanted to do it myself. Big and strong, so strong that no one can control me."

"Xiaodong, Matthew and I are really just partners. But he didn't realize that he gave up at that time, and that relationship ended. When he realized that there was no way to get me back, he began to want Came to harass you. I stopped him when I found out about it. I just wanted to make it clear to him during that meal, and then I found someone to drive him back."

"Xiaodong, me." "Okay, I'm sleepy, I'm going to sleep, don't talk." I couldn't listen anymore, just now I almost wanted to forgive him, I turned my back to him, pretending to sleep.

After two days of suffering, I was finally discharged from the hospital. Back to my den, all the messy debris and blood stains were cleaned up that day.I lay on my bed, and the familiar smell reassured me a lot.Park Xiansong came with him and sat in the living room.

"Brother Pan, you drive him away, I don't want to see him again."

"Don't instruct me. If you want to drive someone away, go yourself." Pan Bing was unmoved, and arranged the medicines beside my bed.

"By the way, how did you find out and send me to the hospital that day?"

"You finally remembered to ask." Pan Bing despised my belated understanding. "How else can I find out? Of course it's because of Park Hyun-song. I was about to go to bed when someone knocked on my door. I opened it and it was Park Hyun-song. He said there was a sound of breaking glass in your room. Let me go in and see what's going on." Condition."

"I thought he wanted to take the opportunity to enter your house, so I ignored him, but his crazy expression at that time made me think that something might have happened to you. Then, no one answered when I knocked on the door. Fortunately, your fingerprints I was able to open the lock, and when I went in, I saw blood on the ground, and you were lying there unconscious. I was scared to death, and Park Xiansong went crazy, and rushed out the door while hugging him."

"Xiaodong, it was really Park Xiansong who saved you this time." After Pan Bing said that, he was afraid for a while, and I felt bad.

"Xiaodong, Kaichen is here." Pu Xiansong knocked on the door and came in, followed by Zhou Kaichen.Both Pan Bing and Park Xiansong went to the living room, while Zhou Kaichen chatted with me in the bedroom.

Zhou Kaichen chatted with me for a long time with a smile, and took out various forms for me to fill out.Finally filled it out, Zhou Kaichen put it away, told me to have a good rest, then opened the door and left the bedroom.I don't know what the result will be. Anyway, I just take medicine, take medicine, and keep taking medicine.

I fell asleep and felt like someone was touching my face.I opened my eyes and it was Park Hyun-song, "Don't make trouble, I want to sleep."

"Hey, you sleep, my husband is with you, okay?" Park Xiansong's words brought me back to those warm days in the past.

"Yeah." I was greedy for the beauty of that time, after all, it was the first time I fell in love with someone, and I was so happy to have him around.

Park Xiansong went to bed and lay next to me, hugging me tightly, with the familiar temperature and familiar smell, I found a comfortable position and continued to sleep, with the sound of regular heartbeats in my ears.Just let it go, just let it go this time.

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I love you in everything I do.