my girlfriend is lily

When she left the stage, just as she was about to open the bottle vigorously like twisting the throat of an enemy and then gulp down her belly, she was told that the POS machine had been repaired and the card could no longer be used.

"Alipay is also acceptable." The clerk said.

Zhiying: "Uh, I left my phone in the apartment too."

Zhiying had hallucinations caused by dehydration, and "Dyinginthesun" sounded in her ears, "Do youremember~Thethingsweusedtosay~Ifeisoneverous~WhenIthinkofyesterday~HowcouldIletthingsgettome~Likedyinginthesun~Likedyinginthesun~Likedyinginthesun~Likedying...

Zhiying walked out of the supermarket shaking, and finally walked into a cafe. Within 5 minutes, there were empty glasses of toffee latte and caramel macchiato on her table.

The next day, Zhiying became a panda sister, "Oh, what's wrong with you?"

"You can see it, I obviously put eye stickers on."

Zhiying looked tired, she finished mending, and we sat on the seats by the artificial lake to watch the ducks on the lake.

On the chilly dark green lake, clumsy-looking fat ducks lined up and swam gracefully and comfortably. I remembered that there was a shop selling duck necks by the lake, and I was worried about the fate of the ducks.

"Yesterday, I drank very authentic coffee."

"When you have insomnia, you can send me a WeChat message to chat with me. How uncomfortable it is to lie alone."

"Huh? Can you? Don't you sleep at night? Are you not sleepy chatting in the middle of the night?"

"..."

Zhiying who asked me a series of questions seriously was as stupid as a duck in an artificial lake.

After the winter vacation, I thought: I wonder how much Jiashu's writing skills have improved?

It is said that Jia Shu woke up and went to the bathroom listlessly to brush his teeth. He was staring at his decadent self in a daze in the mirror when he suddenly felt a chill on his hands.

He thought maybe he had a cramp and ignored it. At this moment, he felt a cold and itchy feeling on the back of his hand again.

Am I drooling?How did it flow to the back of the hand?

He looked up at the roof, when a bean-sized water drop happened to hit the tip of his nose, it was a leak upstairs.

Jiashu took out the phone book and called: "Hello, I live downstairs from your house, your toilet is leaking..."

Before he could finish speaking, the woman on the phone stopped him: "I'm in a meeting, let's talk about it later, hang up." She hung up the phone immediately after saying the word 'finished'.

Jiashu decided to go upstairs to try his luck, and he kept ringing the doorbell with the speed of whack-a-mole in a destructive way dedicated to debt collection.

"Who is it" came from the anti-theft door, which was the same as the female voice on the phone just now?

Jia Shu was also polite: "I'm Jang Keun Suk!"

"Huh? What are you talking about?" The other party deeply wondered if his ears got water or he was dreaming.

"Xiaoyou, I lied to you, it's me, Song Zhongji!" Jia Shu acted coquettishly without skin and shame.

"Ah? Who are you?" The neighbor sister who was cleaning the house with a vacuum cleaner was curious.

"I'll tell you when I open the door!"

Perhaps this elder sister really missed the above two. She once said that she was in a meeting without hesitation and opened the door to the neighbor who came to find the leaking toilet.

Jiashu tried his best to describe the situation of the water leakage: "Just now, my house was flooded like a big waterfall, and my house was flooded into the ocean. I didn't need to take the elevator and was directly washed up by the water. I really thought it was The Milky Way has burst its banks!"

The sister of the neighbor was shocked when he said that, and immediately gave him a swimming ring that was occupied by the house so that he could survive the flood. This swimming ring was exactly the one I saw at his birthday party.

The latest issue of "Turtle Speed ​​Man and Octopus Girl" is about the hobby of Octopus Girl. She is a hand controler who looks at her hands but not her face (you have so many hands and can't see enough?), when taking the bus after school, The bus swayed like it was driving on the sea, and the octopus girl who was about to be squeezed into dried octopus swayed from side to side like kelp in the rhythm of the sea. She inadvertently raised her head with an expression of eating bitter melon.

But I saw four or five male and female hands protruding from different styles of cuffs hanging on the handrail of the bus ring (sounds so scary).

Octopus girl immediately put on retro glasses and turned into a beauty pageant judge. She gave the contestants the following scores: 8.3 for the female college student who had manicure, 7.9 for the office worker in a black suit, and 10 for the high school boy who was worried that he would not be able to finish his homework tonight 8.0. A well-maintained middle-aged woman wearing bracelets and rings [-].

The twin-tailed octopus girl re-examined the contestants professionally, and was convinced that her scoring was absolutely fair and just.

Wait, did I forget something important?Oh, right! (The girl slapped her thigh), just appeared a contestant who was the first to achieve a full score since the beginning of Pangu! ! !

Let us congratulate him with warm applause!In the bus, except for the driver and the award-winning male high school student, everyone clapped their hands. It was like Chinese New Year in the car ^(*￣(oo)￣)^.

The male high school student is embarrassed, under the watchful eyes of everyone, he looks like a three-year-old boy who was caught alive for stealing candy, blushing and stammering: "Uh...uh... I want to thank me Mom and Dad, because their hands are beautiful, um... I also want to thank my grandparents, because their hands are also beautiful..."

I closed the magazine and laughed for a long time, it made me want to vomit, a writer who can write a load of mental illness is definitely not an ordinary person!Must be a senior patient.

Q: What is the author of "Octopus Girl" doing?

Answer: Jiashu lived the life of Cinderella.

While his parents were leisurely watching TV and peeling and eating oranges, Jia Shu was sitting on a small bench picking bean sprouts one by one.

During the first two days of the winter vacation, Jiashu said, "Mom~ I want to eat noodles." On the table: a bowl of tomato egg noodles with persimmons cut into petals and eggs;

Two days later, Jia Shu: "Mom~ I want to eat noodles." On the table: a bowl of noodles with a whole tomato and an unpeeled boiled egg;

Two days later, Jia Shu: "Mom~......"

"Don't call me, I don't care, you don't need to drink breast milk long ago!"

Jia Shu: "..." (Baby feels bad, baby doesn't say//(TT)//)

It was almost noon that day, and Jia Shu didn't make it in time to eat breakfast. He went to the kitchen to wash a cucumber and eat it. After eating the cucumber, he ate another carrot.Jiashu was planning to go to the living room to play games. Jiashu's father blocked the door of the kitchen with a bear-like body, and the light in the kitchen was dim.

Papa Bear: "What are you eating from my house?"

Jiashu yelled confidently: "I didn't eat anything!"

Papa Bear: "I just heard a click!"

Jia Shu swears to the refrigerator: "If it's me, I'll poke the second gear of the hair dryer myself."

Papa Xiong approached Jiashu step by step, "No need!" Papa Xiong said earnestly, "Just help with the cooking."

At noon, Jiashu's works came to the table one after another, and Papa Xiong said something extra: "Did I put the shredded green onion and ginger?"

Jiashu asked with a dazed expression, "Ah? What is shredded green onion... ginger... shreds?"

He thought about it carefully, where did the salt come from?It appears that there is no salt.

Jiashu's parents tried a bite, and their expressions changed rapidly, from typhoon storm to cloudy and then sunny, and finally the two looked sunny, full of praise for their son's cooking skills.

"Ah! Did you make this! I've never served such delicious food! This level can serve a state banquet!"

"Help me with your skills, it's better than your grandma!"

Jiashu roared inwardly: Don't you just want me to cook for you in the future!I even lied because of my narrow-mindedness, as for it! "

This day Chun sent a voice message to Jia Shu, "Your novel writing in this issue is a bit difficult." Chun is so straightforward, Jia Shu thought it was true, and there was not much material left in his mind, so he clicked on the second voice "Are you going ice fishing?" Jia Shu agreed excitedly.

The next morning, Chun: "Have you come out yet?" Jia Shu: "Well, we are out, waiting for the bus at the bus station." Chun: "Well, I am also at the bus station. If you see bus No. 534 Come on, we'll take a car."

Jia Shu waited at the station, three of the 543 trains had arrived, and there was no sign of the 534.Every time 543 stops at the station, Jiashu desperately suppresses the urge to get on the bus.Finally, a 534 drove over, and Jiashu confirmed again and again. He saw Chunzheng sitting on the seat closest to the driver with his back to him, and then he jumped on the bus with confidence in the mood of winning the lottery.

Chun said to Jiashu calmly as usual: "This car does not accept credit cards. I didn't bring any change when I came out. You pay it for me first." ) ah, the driver still kept his demeanor without paying the fare!

Chapter 13

During the winter vacation, my cousin who was studying in college came here by plane to celebrate the New Year.

My cousin runs an online store. According to him, the business is booming and he is making money every day.

However, the first thing my cousin did after the plane landed was to borrow winter clothes from me.

Me: "You won't be sorry