Jiang Hao

More than breaking up with Xiaoli at that time.

But even if the two breakups were added together, it was not as painful as when Jiang Hao said he was leaving.

I didn't contact Jiang Hao, there was no need and I couldn't find a suitable reason.

An interesting thing happened during the summer vacation of freshman year.

It's not that friends don't get together, I got acquainted with Lu Zhengyang through a friend by accident.

In the beginning, at friends' gatherings, I didn't say a word to Lu Zhengyang.

Jason laughed and yelled at me: Don't make it too ugly, you don't understand anything about face.Thinking about it, this is indeed the case, as long as I encounter things related to Jiang Hao, I can't even deal with the most basic way of dealing with people, such as saving face.

When I met Lu Zhengyang for the third time, I drank with him.At the beginning, it was a bit of a competition for wine, and he and I both had a taste of mutual dissatisfaction.Halfway through the drink, I suddenly remembered what my dad said to me before: You don’t make money, so drinking the wine at home is nothing.

After that, it was a bit dull.

I shook my head and pushed away the wine that Lu Zhengyang handed over, "It's boring." I'm too lazy to talk nonsense with him.

Later, Lu Zhengyang took the initiative to find me, and I stared at the phone in a daze for a long time before I understood: He wants to have dinner with me.

I went without much hesitation, someone invited me to dinner, why not go.

At the dinner table, Lu Zhengyang talked about Jiang Hao.At that time, Jiang Hao had only left for two months, and I broke up with Gao Siyan again, feeling so aggrieved that I had nowhere to vent.If Lu Zhengyang wants to talk, I will accompany him.

Lu Zhengyang's initial topic was relatively normal, and it was nothing more than Jiang Hao's studies.After saying a few words, he suddenly asked me, "Do you know what happened to him before?"

I frowned, "What do you mean?"

"Those things about him in junior high school."

"How do you know?" I asked back, acquiescing that I knew that.

Lu Zhengyang hesitated, handed me a cigarette, and said after a while, "I knew his lover back then."

"Really..." I had a strange feeling in my heart, this world is really small.I didn't show it on the face, and continued following his words, "He mentioned to me what happened at that time, it was just an outline, I don't know the specifics."

Lu Zhengyang nodded, "I don't think there will be any difference, I just know that man loves Jiang Hao so much."

I remember that person finally used the word 'hate' to describe his feelings, "Didn't you say something happened at home?"

"Well," Lu Zhengyang raised his head and looked at me, "It's not just an accident at home... that person is also a special sports recruit, and his high school grades are very good. I was also in junior high school at that time, and many people in the physical school knew about him and Jiang Hao , he wanted to be with Jiang Hao all the time, but it ended up like that.”

"Do you think Jiang Hao is sorry for him?" I guessed that before Lu Zhengyang asked Jiang Hao to help him cheat, it was probably because of this mentality.

"If you knew what that person became after Jiang Hao left, you would be the same as me."

I nod, it's hard to judge.My heart is towards Jiang Hao, but I also know that the speech of a family cannot be generalized, "Where is that person now?"

Lu Zhengyang raised his eyebrows, "Why?" His expression became more funny, "You really want to meet..."

"Didn't you mention this?" I responded jokingly.

"People have already left school," Lu Zhengyang replied, "I don't know where he is now, and I probably don't want to see Jiang Hao for the rest of my life."

Lu Zhengyang didn't mention asking Jiang Hao to help him cheat, "You asked Jiang Hao to help you cheat because of this?" I said this while I was drunk, although my tone was relaxed, but with accusations.

He didn't deny it, he looked at me and laughed, "Actually, I don't care about failing the course at all, I'm sure I can graduate anyway. I just see that Jiang Hao is doing well, and I don't think it's worth it for Yuan Rui." After he finished speaking, he was stunned for a moment Later, he explained, "Jiang Hao's original friend's name was Yuan Rui."

I nodded and stopped talking.

Talking about Jiang Hao's relationship problems, I feel somewhat guilty.Although Jiang Hao has clearly hinted that I should stay away, but the feelings in my heart have not passed. I am subconsciously afraid that Lu Zhengyang will see something, so I am vigilant and avoid it.

"But there were quite a lot of people who liked Jiang Hao at that time," Lu Zhengyang continued, "At that time, there were several people around Yuan Rui who wanted to poach him. At that time, I thought it was only Yuan Rui. I like men, but later I found out that there are quite a few of them.”

"You don't..." I guessed.

"I have a girlfriend, and it's been two and a half years."

After talking about this group of people in college after many years, I was surprised to find that Lu Zhengyang and her girlfriend are the most affectionate people I know in my age group.

When I first got acquainted with Lu Zhengyang, my heart was always a little complicated, and I felt that I was a little unreasonable to Jiang Hao.After all, Lu Zhengyang made it difficult for Jiang Hao on the surface. Although I don't have to choose sides, I still have my own place, which is natural.

As I got more and more involved with Lu Zhengyang during that summer vacation, and Jason flicked on both sides, I didn't take this feeling seriously anymore.

Compared with the freshman, the sophomore is much less "thrilling". After a year of baptism, everyone is unwilling to make a fool of themselves and become a laughing stock, so they are much more low-key and calm in doing things.

Entering the sophomore year, there will be a new batch of freshman students correspondingly.

"It is said that there are several good-looking girls in our college this year." Jason told me in the first week of school.

"They're all in military training, and their short hair is still so tanned. How can you tell that it's not bad?" I complained.

"And that's why what looks good is really good."

In the first half of my sophomore year, I had an affair with a freshman girl for a while.

She is also a child, and they have known each other since high school.

The reason for the ambiguity is that she asked me about the class a few weeks after the start of school, and I sent her text messages without saying a word. At the end, she sent me: [Brother Kun, thank you.It feels good to have a senior...] I read the text message for a while, feeling lost.

The ambiguity with her also made me fully aware of my own problems. I am interested in her, but it is not like the physical interest in Xiaoli and Gao Siyan at the beginning.

The ambiguous time was only a few months, I kissed her tentatively, but she didn't push me away, but if I really want to take a step forward to confirm the relationship with her, I feel a little unwilling.

After getting along a few times, she may feel that I just want to take advantage of her, and then the communication will decrease.I'm too lazy to explain, and this matter will be over.

In fact, for myself, I can't explain some level of disinterest in her.

14

As Lu Zhengyang himself said, there are many sports students around him who are interested in men.

Xiao Cai and I met in the swimming pool. He is a student of Lu Zhengyang Physical Education Academy.

It was the second half of the sophomore year, when the weather was just warming up, I made an appointment with Lu Zhengyang and Jason to go swimming, and we met Xiao Cai who was in the third year of high school.

"What's so good about your school?" Xiao Cai was sitting by the swimming pool, while Lu Zhengyang was describing the university situation to him.

I came out of the locker room, saw Lu Zhengyang from a distance, and walked towards him.

At first, Xiao Cai didn't attract much of my attention.He practiced long-distance running, and his body was well-proportioned and slender. He looked like a typical good student in high school, and there was nothing wrong with him.

We went swimming, and Jason dragged his new girlfriend into the deep water in no time.

Xiao Cai leaned over to me, looked at me and asked, "Are you from the same university as Brother Yang?"

I nodded, "What?"

"He said he would let me go to college with you later."

"Are you interested?" I asked.People I just met, I am not good at expressing opinions, and I don't think it has much to do with me.Later, when I got acquainted with each other, I realized that Xiao Cai's sports performance is very good, and it is considered an inferior talent to enroll in our school as a special recruit.

I thought of Jiang Hao, and the summer vacation in the third year of high school two years ago, we also swam together and got very close.I haven't thought of Jiang Hao for a while, he's been gone for almost a year, and I've begun to forget some things, but this weak connection makes some things in my heart be recalled involuntarily.

Xiao Cai looks very delicate, compared with Jiang Hao's handsome, his style is completely different.

Regarding my question, he shrugged first, "Who knows." After speaking, he approached me.

Cai Xia got so close to me in the pool, so close that his own cheeks turned red.Familiar feelings, familiar scenes, completely different people, I feel strange.

Before the end of that semester, Lu Zhengyang suddenly asked about my sexuality.

At that time, Xiao Cai and I made private appointments a few times. I took him to eat, watch movies, and hang out, but there was no real behavior.When I walk on the road on weekdays, there is always half a person's distance between me and Cai Xia, just like the most normal friends.

I didn't plan to respond to Lu Zhengyang's question directly at first, "Why do you care about this?"

"Xiao Cai faltered and asked a lot about you..."

In an instant, I understood why Jiang Hao said to me angrily, 'Do you always like to inquire about other people's affairs so much? '.Frankly speaking, this made me a little disgusted, "What is there to ask?" I was talking about Lu Zhengyang, and I was also talking about Xiao Cai.

"Fuck, why are there so many bends around me?" He seemed to have already understood the answer, and I didn't deny it immediately, and it might have been a subconscious acquiescence.

For the first time in my life, I felt a sense of relief. I've never thought about the term 'coming out', but Lu Zhengyang's immediate reaction seemed to intensify my sense of self-identity, "What kind of crooked..." retorted casually, lacking convincingness.

Lu Zhengyang raised the corners of his mouth, "Is it true that everyone who has your hexagram is crooked?"

i'm a bit lost