Journey to the West: Monks do not tell lies, they only rob

There is another high mountain in front of me.

Ugh……

Tang Shan deadpanned as she delivered Tang Sanzang's must-read line: "The mountains are high and the waters are deep; there may be jackals and monsters. Disciples, be careful."

After saying that, he continued to droop his head listlessly and closed his eyes to take a nap.

Come out quickly and beat me up so I can continue on my way.

I don’t want to do even one more day of this 365-day non-stop journey to obtain the scriptures.

If I were to dress up as a little maid in Dream of the Red Chamber, I could still look at beautiful women and handsome men, and occasionally sneak into the kitchen to eat some delicious dishes.

Why is it that now I either look at the mountains or face the goblins every day?

If I keep going like this, my horse riding skills will be good enough for me to enter a world-class competition.

"Brother Monkey, Master seems to be a little depressed lately."

Zhu Bajie carried a load and climbed the mountain every day, and Tang Shan deliberately controlled his diet.

His original potbelly was visibly reduced in weight.

"Have you found out what caused it?"

Huh? I just asked for your concern, and you want me to follow up and investigate?

Zhu Bajie laughed wryly and said, "I must have been mistaken."

Wukong twirled the iron rod in his hand, "Three minutes. I want all the information about Master's bad mood."

Zhu Bajie...

You're crazy. You think you're a domineering president.

Several of us eat and live together every day. How can I know it if you don’t know it?

There are still three minutes left. Three minutes is just enough for you to go to heaven.

"Brother Monkey, why don't you watch less stupid dramas in the future and watch the fashion show with me instead."

"No," Sha Seng interrupted, "it's better to watch 100,000 Whys with me."

Zhu Bajie: "Lao Sha, with your brain, even if you look at a million whys, it will still be the same."

……

Amidst the noise, they met a woodcutter on the mountain road.

"Ahead is a six-hundred-li flat-topped mountain. Inside is a lotus cave. There are two demons in the cave. Their magic weapons are very powerful. You'd better take a detour."

Wukong was just about to say that he was invincible.

The woodcutter said quickly, "Those two demons even drew pictures and wanted to capture the monk from the Tang Dynasty in the East who was supposed to have immortality from eating him."

Okay, that’s all for today.

As long as Tang Seng insists on reaching Pingdingshan, we can call it a day.

Tang Shan said "Oh" and turned her horse around to walk back.

Wukong: Huh? Is this even possible?

Zhu Bajie: That’s great, I don’t have to be afraid of encountering powerful monsters anymore.

Sha Seng: Master must have his reasons for doing this.

woodcutter……

Why doesn’t Tang Seng play by the rules?

Shouldn't he move forward resolutely and never retreat?

If he leaves, what will we do about this problem?

Seeing Tang Shan walking back without hesitation, the woodcutter quickly changed back to his true form.

It turned out to be the fairy on duty who secretly protected Tang Monk on his journey to obtain Buddhist scriptures.

"Holy monk, wait a minute!"

The master and his disciples turned around and asked, "What? Can't you finish what you want to say all at once?"

Gong Cao forced a smile and said, "You should continue to move forward. With the Great Sage here, there will be no problems."

Tang Shan: "That's not what you said just now."

"You keep jumping around like this, acting differently from moment to moment. It makes people suspect that you are a spy sent by the monster."

Gong Cao was terrified. "The immortal knows that the goblins in Pingding Mountain are powerful, so he informed you in advance so that you can be prepared."

It's not easy for even the gods to survive in this system.

Tang Shan: "Then you can just tell the heavens. What do you think? Would it be more fun to become a woodcutter?"

Gongcao: This can’t be blatant cheating.

"Also, I think you're giving the monster advance notice to come and get us."

Wukong swung the iron rod and Zhu Bajie carried the rake.

"Gong Cao, explain it."

"Holy monk, I wouldn't dare to do this even if you gave me a hundred guts. We are all responsible for protecting you."

Tang Shan looked up at the dazzling colorful clouds above her head.

Damn, I can see it from hundreds of miles away.

What's the difference between this and listening to the radio shouting "Tang Seng is here" all the way?

It was difficult for them to complete these eighty-one difficulties.

"Since you're here to protect me, and you know there are monsters ahead, shouldn't you go and take care of them first before notifying me?"

Gongcao was ashamed: Who is going to obtain the scriptures now?

Besides, our superiors only asked us to be responsible for notifications, but didn’t tell us to do so much.

"This is not within the scope of our mission."

"Then what are you responsible for?" Tang Shan asked.

"Take turns protecting you."

"Then go and beat the monster away."

“That’s not my area of ​​business.”

"So what do you do?"

Gongcao...

If I'm guilty, you can lock me up.

Instead of sending me down to protect Tang Monk on his journey to the West to obtain Buddhist scriptures.

"Host, the monster in the Lotus Cave is carrying many treasures, worth two million taels of gold."

Tang Shan, who had been lifeless and listless, seemed to be instantly injected with chicken blood.

Two million, plus all the looted money before, would be enough to pay half of the ransom.

"Go! Disciples, charge!"

King of the Golden Horn, King of the Silver Horn, here I come!

Everyone: This attitude change is too fast...

"Ah-chi!" The Silver Horn King sneezed unexpectedly.

"Brother, I suddenly have a bad feeling."

"Don't worry, brother. With those few treasures we have, we are unrivaled within a radius of hundreds of miles."

Tang Shan: That’s right, I came here just for these treasures of yours.

Zhu Bajie was panting as he carried the load, "White Dragon Horse, please run slower. I'm dying of exhaustion."

"Master, please wait for me~"

What was left to him was Tang Shan's resolute back and the dust along the way.

Gongcao returned to heaven quickly.

No, I have to find someone to replace me.

If you keep doing this, you will be killed by Tang Seng sooner or later.

Huh? How come no monsters came to catch me after running for so long?

Didn’t you say you would hold my portrait and wait to catch me?

Tang Shan pulled the reins and said, "If they don't come to catch me, how can I know where their lair is?"

You can't just go all over the mountains looking for the fairy cave by yourself.

"Master, look, there's a demon over there!"

Wukong pointed at the two little demons in front and whispered.

Tang Shan excitedly got off the horse and finally found me.

She ran in two steps to the little demon who was looking at the portrait.

Tang Shan stretched out his hands swiftly, "I am Tang Monk, quickly take me back."

Don't waste time, hurry up.

Wukong: Master, what do you want to do now?

Zhu Bajie hurried over and saw this scene as soon as he arrived.

Forget it, Master must be eyeing that monster’s treasure again.

Soon, there will be another heartbroken goblin...

The two little demons looked at each other, wondering who would ask to be caught.

"He said he was Tang Monk."

"I even said I was the Jade Emperor. Don't think you can be Tang Sanzang just because you have a bald head."

This doesn't look like the painting at all.

"No, I really am Tang Monk. If you don't catch me, your king will definitely not let you go."

The little demon sneered: "Look at yourself, do you look even a little bit like Tang Monk?"

The portrait shows: squinting eyes, crooked nose, buck teeth, protruding mouth, and face full of acne scars.

Tang Shan: This is a photo scam!