After Black Lotus became a reborn person, he went completely crazy

Chen Jin: "You make your ideal marriage sound like an arranged marriage. Once you discuss the conditions, the whole feeling changes, as if it is not the case. An arranged marriage is a choice that you have to make, and some choices are not made by ordinary people."

"You're right, it has indeed changed. Do you think there are no pros and cons in your real marriage? No, there are. It's just that the marriage level of ordinary people can't reach that level, so it's not so obvious.

They looked at each other's family background, ability, financial resources, appearance, height, income, and temper. Which one of them was not considered over and over again? Really, they actually had to weigh all of them. They were all the result of a series of comparisons and weighings, but they were doing it in the name of love.

The essence of marriage is a business partnership. Two strangers come together to raise one or two children together, and for the "small family" project, they keep investing money, energy and time into it, supporting each other, and trying to run the "small family" project as long as possible.

Before entering into a relationship, you need to think clearly about your bottom line, how far you can compromise, what your ultimate goal is, and what kind of person you want to find. You should be careful not to rush into marriage without thinking clearly.

How many girls, because of what others say: "You're old enough, it's time to get married, it doesn't matter who you marry", get married in a daze, thinking they are marrying for love, but in fact find out that it is someone else's second best. At this time, they have no place to cry afterwards.

It's important to know where your bottom line is.

For example, some people like to live a life of superiority. It doesn’t matter if they are bullied by their mother-in-law or if their husband cheats on them. They don’t care. They only care about whether their position is stable and how much money they have.

This kind of woman tends to live a good and sober life. As long as she doesn't waste her time on internal friction, her marriage can continue. This kind of woman is often very strong.

Most men, no matter how they fool around outside, are unwilling to divorce easily.

It's not that men can't bear to part with women, it's that men as a whole are afraid of trouble, afraid of being nagged and annoyed. Unless things become troublesome to a certain extent, they are unwilling to "change". In other words, they like to maintain stability and the status quo.

The ideal state in a man's mind is to have a red flag flying at home and colorful flags flying outside. Moreover, he also knows that most women outside are after his power and money, and the original wife at home is the dumbest and most innocent, and can be trusted, but the women outside are different.

Therefore, these people also classify and grade the various women around them in their hearts. He can sleep with any woman without any scruples or choices, but when you ask him to marry her home, most of them are unwilling to do it.

Because they know in their hearts that some women are suitable for playing around and not suitable for keeping at home. If a man gets too excited and marries his mistress, it means that the mistress has great acting skills and skills, and her emotional value must be at its highest.

He will choose to give up unless his original wife is no longer of any use to him, and the one outside is pushing him very hard, and the one outside is very resourceful and anxious to get promoted. Otherwise, he will not easily take the step of divorce even for the sake of maintaining the integrity of his property.

This is also why many men have a lot of women outside, but if you ask them to divorce and marry someone else, they are unwilling to do it. To put it bluntly, it is because divorce is not good for them, and after thinking about it, maintaining the status quo is the most beneficial to them.

Look, men are weighing the pros and cons and making choices anytime and anywhere. When men have almost figured out the pros and cons and various consequences in their minds, women are still concerned about which mistress their men are showing affection with today, or which concubine they are buying things for tomorrow.

There are even women who will recall the good times in the past over and over again, saying that the other party was not like this before, how could he treat me like this? How am I worse than a mistress, I have been with him all the way, etc., etc., almost crying and sulking to death.

Look, the two of them are not on the same channel or level at all. Do you think it is possible for such a woman to avoid being at a disadvantage in marriage?

When men are thinking about how to divide or transfer their property, women are still obsessed with past relationships and unable to extricate themselves, asking the other party why they changed their mind and why they suddenly stopped loving them?

I just want to ask, are these women stupid? Are they foolish?

Smart women have already seized floating assets and immovable assets and started to keep all kinds of evidence. If you plan to divorce, you have a divorce plan. If you don't plan to divorce, you must have means and measures to avoid divorce.

You can steal my man, but you can’t steal my money.

A wise and capable woman, who cares whether you love a mistress today or a mistress tomorrow? If the other person is dirty, then he or she becomes garbage. Garbage is also classified into useful garbage and useless garbage.

When it comes to useless garbage, you must be quick and leave it immediately. If not now, when?

As for useful trash, cleaning it up can still allow him to continue to contribute to his own family, let him continue to work like a beast of burden, try to squeeze out the last bit of value from him, and then let him go.

At this time, you must remember not to be stupid and still immerse yourself in your feelings and self-perceptions. It is also taboo to say why he has changed. You must know that change is the only unchanging truth in the world.

In front of property and benefits, self-feelings and emotions are nothing. The most frightening thing is that others will take away all your property, and you are still crying about your feelings and crying about your children being left without a father. Is it appropriate?

Regardless of whether a man or a woman chooses to betray this relationship, it indirectly shows that he or she has given up on this relationship. If someone has given up, and you are still crying, how can they change? Isn't this a mental problem?

Having said so much, what I want to say is that neither you nor I can guarantee whether the person you marry will cheat in the future. This is a part that we have no say in and cannot control.

But you can always choose who to marry, right? Try to be more cautious and careful when making your choice, and choose someone who is not too bad, and you will have taken a big step forward.

Then, regarding the nature of marriage, we must see its essence clearly and not demand too much from marriage. It is a cooperation.

If a man is quiet, family-oriented and doesn't mess around outside, we can't expect him to be eloquent and provide emotional value to us. We can't be salty, sweet, and charming.

We can't have everything. He does what he is good at, and we do what we are good at. If we work together, we can get by. For example, if someone likes to cook but doesn't like to wash the pot, then one person cooks and the other washes the pot. If he likes to cook or his cooking is delicious, then we clean the house.

If he can earn money but just doesn't like doing housework, then just hire someone to do it. Why do you have to ask him to do it himself? Why bother him? It's annoying to supervise him and it takes energy. Why bother?