Am I being simulated by their love affair?

After finding that Matsueda Jun did not have any special reaction, Tomatsu Tomoka felt relieved but also disappointed. She hoped that Matsueda Jun could be more angry, so that it would show that he cared about her.

The bell rang and the two walked back to the classroom together.

"Matsuki-senpai said I've been doing pretty well lately. Jun-kun, can you please continue telling me stories?"

"You really can't forget it..."

Mochizuki Haruka was standing in the corridor of the teaching building, watching the men and women leaving the basketball court.

"Sugisaki, it's useless."

Chapter 18: At the end of July, the bluebird brought news of summer

"Where were we last time?"

"My ex-girlfriend's classmate turned around and jumped into Lake Higashi-Omo."

Then Jun Matsueda began to fall in love.

In order to appease the girl, Jun Matsueda accepted her love, but he said that he did not like her enough.

The girl said it didn’t matter, as long as they could be together first.

"Feelings can be cultivated slowly." Tomatsu Tomoka agreed.

They were in the reference room, and Tomatsu Tomoka was organizing class meeting materials while listening to stories.

Although there was no love, Jun Matsueda tried his best to fulfill his boyfriend's obligations and meet the girl's requirements. At that time, they were the most enviable model couple in the class.

"What did she ask for?"

"We'd eat together, go to the movies, go shopping, go on various dates, and then study together, stay in the library until dusk, take a walk at sunset, and listen to the breath of the Tama River on the wind."

Hu Song silently took note that she would cover all of this up after they started dating, leaving only her own traces.

Jun Matsueda didn't know when things started to change. The girl's demands became more and more, and she wanted to occupy all of his time.

The girl persuaded Jun Matsueda to move out of the orphanage. She had already persuaded her parents that the four of them could live together.

That was the first time that Jun Matsueda felt panic. He rejected the girl's proposal, and the girl did not have any special reaction at the time.

But after that, the girl started calling frequently when they were apart, and the orphanage's only landline was filled with her calls.

When Jun Matsueda was in school, the girls did not allow him to talk to other girls and required him to tell them who he met and what he said in a day.

Matsueda Jun could only ask her if this was a bit too much. The girl suddenly burst into tears and said that she just loved him too much.

"You are the only one in my world now, can't I be the only one in your world?" the girl said.

Tomatsu Tomoka could imagine the girl's tone, which made her shudder.

The ending was naturally a breakup, and Matsueda Jun told the girl face to face. In order to prevent her from doing anything extreme, he deliberately chose the place behind the teaching building, where there were no mountains or rivers, and there were soft fallen leaves nearby, which was relatively safe.

The girl didn't say anything and transferred to another school the next day. Jun Matsueda never saw her again.

"Is that it?" Tomatsu Tomoka felt that the ending was a bit strange.

"This is reality, not fiction. Will you be satisfied only if it's a fight to the death?" Matsueda Jun explained.

"Tomatsu-san, I don't want this kind of thing to happen again. Looking back on this relationship now, it only leaves me with memories that are definitely not sweet, and that girl won't be happy either."

"The biggest mistake I made was being soft-hearted and letting her desires grow after we fell in love."

"Love is also a kind of desire, Tomatsu-san. She liked me at first and was happy just to be with me. But after being with me, her desire for love grew infinitely, and I didn't try to curb it. Instead, I accepted her demands. Her love for me became her whole world, so she could only ask for more from me, but this is something I can't satisfy."

“When there is only one person in your mind, you will feel that you don’t love him enough and he doesn’t love you enough.”

"People can't live on love alone. If you only eat one kind of food, no matter how much you like it, you will get tired of it after eating too much. If you throw away all the food and keep only one kind, and then you get tired of it, what will you do?"

"Yamami-san told me that you didn't attend practice today. Tomatsu-san, do you know how moving you are when you play the saxophone? You should have more moments like this in your life."

Jun Matsueda stopped talking and lowered his head to organize the documents. He hadn't spoken so much in a long time. The last time was probably during his opening speech at the beginning of the school year.

Tomatsu Tomoka looked at Matsueda Jun and said, "Jun-kun, it is because of you that you are so different from us that I am sinking deeper and deeper into this trap."

"You didn't hear a word I just said." Matsueda Jun raised his head.

"I lost the bakelite mouthpiece I used to use. Can you go with me to buy a new one after school, Jun?"

Matsueda Jun looked at the girl in front of him: "...Only today."

"Let's set off quickly!" Tomatsu Tomoka stood up.

Turn left after exiting the school gate, and then turn left again at the small intersection. The musical instrument store is hidden on the right side of the road.

After entering the door, a middle-aged man with long hair was lying behind the counter, squinting his eyes and looking drowsy. Matsueda Jun knocked on the counter and the man woke up.

"what do you need?"

He looked at the girl behind him.

"Do you have the new era bakelite mouthpiece from DRAKE?"

The uncle didn't say anything, walked into the backstage warehouse, and came out with a box.

Jun Matsueda took a look and found that the packaging was about the size of a lipstick and there was nothing special about it from the outside.

They finished their shopping in a few minutes and walked out of the store.

"Chun-jun, can you come back to school with me? I'll change the flute head and play it for you."

Jun Matsueda was indeed a little curious. Senior Yamami said that Tomatsu Tomoka's playing was much more moving before. What level was it?

The two walked towards the teaching building again. Tomatsu Tomoka opened the package, took out the flute head and handed it to Matsueda Jun.

"Chun-kun, do you want to see it?"

Jun Matsueda reached out to take it, and the girl's fingertips brushed against his palm and scratched it.

"Sorry." He didn't hear any apology.

He held the gadget in his hand and observed it.

A mouthpiece is a mouthpiece with a central channel for airflow. Tomatsu Tomoka's mouthpiece is made of Bakelite, completely black, with a light blue A-shaped pattern on the top, which perfectly matches her quiet yet endearing temperament.

"Jun-kun, I started learning the saxophone when I was ten." Tomatsu Tomoka walked on the sidewalk, her left hand clasped in front of her chest, her lips slightly puffed, as if she were playing. "Ever since I first saw this mouthpiece, I haven't changed it while practicing, which is about five years."

Her bright face flickered between the shadows of the trees, making it difficult for Songzhi Jun to see clearly.

"I'm a very stubborn person. Once I choose something, I won't give it up easily. The longer I hold on to something, the more delicate my feelings for it become. The longer I use it, the more I discover its advantages. When I look at it now, I can recall the feeling of holding it in my mouth."

"The high notes are bright, the long notes are effortless, it adapts well to the reed, and the texture is pleasant when bitten." The girl smiled. "Of course, my favorite is this blue logo." She leaned over to Matsueda Jun and pointed at the blue A-shaped pattern with her left hand. "It looks very youthful and cute. Doesn't it suit me?"

"But what I like most in my mouth is Chunjun's fingers. I wonder if I'll have the chance to taste them again in the future?" The girl lowered her head and looked up at him with a pitiful look. "So, Chunjun, don't think I'll retreat now that I've set my eyes on you. My feelings for you will only grow deeper and deeper, and I'll become more and more devoted to you."

The girl bared her teeth and claws: "I will chase you all the way, don't even think about running away!"

Matsueda Jun was still looking at the flute head in his hand: "I already knew about this kind of thing."

There was no one in the wind band's practice room. Tomatsu Tomoka took out the golden saxophone, changed the mouthpiece and reed, and stood in front of Matsueda Jun.

Wind instruments have distinct personal characteristics. Even if it is the same instrument and accessories, different people will play it and it will sound completely different.

As soon as the voice sounded, Matsueda Jun understood what Yamami-senpai meant by "much more touching".

The girl was playing "Summer", the soundtrack of "Kikujiro's Summer". It was clearly the summer of her childhood, but Matsueda Jun felt the girl's mood from the jumping melody. The progressive and soothing rhythm was like her attack and temptation, surrounding Matsueda Jun.

The sadness of unrequited love is diluted by the girl's enthusiasm, lingering throughout the entire song and ending with a delicate tremolo, but the girl says, this is not the end.

"Jun-kun, I will definitely let you be blown by me as freely as this flute head." Tomatsu Tomoka licked her bright red lips and made a declaration.

Chapter 19 The road to vacation is too long

The final exam is the day after tomorrow. These days, Jun Matsueda has canceled his after-school job and is concentrating on reviewing.

The weather was so hot that no one wanted to step out of the classroom.

This was the last physical education class. Everyone was hiding under the cool shade of the trees, staring at the fluctuating horizon in the distance. Jun Matsueda was no exception.

Two feet wearing white calf socks and blue and white sneakers stood in front of Jun Matsueda, preventing him from continuing to think about the relationship between fluctuations and heat.

Jun Matsueda raised his head, his eyes sliding across the white thighs wrapped in sports shorts, and met Mochizuki Haruka's gaze. In the steaming air, he felt a hint of coolness.

"Do you want to sit down?" Jun Matsueda patted the empty seat next to him.

The girl walked over to him and sat down, using her right little finger to lift up her bangs that were in front of her eyes.

"Where is Tomatsu?" Mochizuki Haruka asked. It was unbelievable that the scheming woman allowed her to come to Matsueda Jun without showing up.

"Ms. Tomatsu is not feeling well today." He certainly wouldn't say that the girl was on her period and was resting in the health room.

"You understand her more and more." Mochizuki Yao looked at the runway in the distance that was distorted by the heat, just like her twisted heart.

"Mochizuki-san, if you want others to understand you, the best way is to try to show yourself to them, rather than standing still and waiting for their curiosity to spread."

Matsueda Jun used his hands to fan Mochizuki Haruka. The girl's sweat dripped from her ears to her neck. She looked like she couldn't stand the heat. Mochizuki Haruka turned sideways to him, squinting her eyes and slightly tilting her chin up, looking very pleased.

Jun Matsueda resisted the urge to scratch her chin and reminded himself that Mochizuki Haruka was not like a wild cat in school who could be touched and pampered at will.

"Then do you want to understand me?" Mochizuki Haruka opened her eyes and moved closer to him.

Her eyes were so clear that when Jun Matsueda looked at her, it was like looking at a pool of water.

"Do you want to hear the truth?"

Wangyue Yao didn't say anything.

"Mochizuki-san, I don't really want to get to know anyone right now. I have a lot of things to do and can't waste my time. I know you have some feelings for me, but there are so many people who have feelings for me, and I'm long past the stage of being flattered."

Jun Matsueda watched as the water in the pond in front of him became turbid.

"Mochizuki-san always appears suddenly beside me, yet keeps a distance from me. She always asks me questions, yet never talks about herself. Perhaps others would be interested in this mysterious kitten, but I don't want to know why it approaches and then leaves."

The girl suddenly stood up and looked down at him: "You don't care about me?"

"Mochizuki-san, you're my friend and you've helped me before, so of course I care."

"Just because of this?"

"You're asking questions again." Jun Matsueda looked at the other people on the edge of the playground, still sitting under the tree, with no intention of getting up.

Mochizuki Haruka suddenly squatted down, put her face close to his profile, and stared at him straight. Matsueda Jun could even feel her eyelashes brushing against his cheek.

But he didn't make any move.

"What I hate most is your indifferent look." Mochizuki Yao said this hatefully and turned away.

Jun Matsueda still sat in the shade of the tree without moving.

What's wrong with being just ordinary friends? Why do you always want to be special in others' hearts?

"So, whether it's love or young boys and girls, it's really troublesome."

Tomatsu is, Mochizuki is, and that Sugisaki is, too. Can't they just study hard?

When the bell rang, Jun Matsueda went to the health room before returning to the classroom.

Tomatsu Tomoka's face turned pale as she lay on the bed.

"Are you feeling better?"

"Mr. Misawa said he had a bit of heatstroke..."

"Then you should have a good rest. I will ask for leave for you from the next class." Jun Matsueda was about to leave the health room when he was stopped by Tomatsu Tomoka.

"Chun Jun, I suddenly remembered that I haven't said sorry to you yet."

Jun Matsueda looked back at her.

"You were drinking with me earlier because you wanted to pay to investigate the rumormongers. I'm really sorry for being angry with you in my heart..."

"Tomatsu-san, please don't bring this up as if it's the past. I haven't forgotten it yet."

"I'm sorry." The girl choked and sobbed on the bed with her back to him, and Matsueda Jun covered her with the quilt.

When Jun Matsueda walked out of the health room, Tomoka Tomatsu covered her mouth to prevent her crying from being heard, and her tears stopped after a while.

Crying itself has no meaning, it is only the people who care about it that give it value. The girl knows this very well.

"It seems that Junjun still hasn't forgiven me. Simply apologizing won't work. I need to think of other ways..." The girl buried her head in the quilt and thought.

On the way back to the classroom, Jun Matsueda was stopped by Ko Tsushima, who took him to the news department.

Imokawa was also in the club room, sitting at the conference table, her face flushed. When Matsueda saw her, he remembered the girl watching an action movie in the club room.

"The tentative plan for the summer filming is for you two to form a team. Imokawa-san will be in charge of filming, and Matsueda will be in charge of interviewing."

"We'll discuss the specific arrangements and precautions at dinner after the final exams."