I Trick Even the Lames to Stand Up for Me

Fu Ximing tried his best to persuade his wife to come back: "The masters are here, what are you afraid of? You just kowtow to be a daughter-in-law. After cremation, it's over. If you are for me, come back... You will not be able to make it through if you don't come back." Ah, what if she keeps making trouble? She has been looking for me for the past two days, and I almost died, do you know? How will your mothers live after I die, you have to raise two children by yourself. "

When his wife heard this, she was also scared, "Okay, I'll go back, the child doesn't have to go back."

Fu Ximing also took a step back, "The child doesn't need to come back, you can send it to your mother."

Hearing this, Gu Ye curled his lips and waved to Xie Cheng, "Come on, let's find out where the old lady is hiding."

Gu Ye and Xie Cheng wandered around and found a big chimney on the opposite hill in the east of the village.Gu Ye pointed there, "There is a corpse over there."

"Wow, how did you see it? Why didn't I learn it?"

Gu Ye was disgusted, "Have you really studied hard?"

Xie Cheng laughed twice, "Are you really only 20 years old? How did you learn so many skills?"

"My master left a lot of books, I'll show you some other day."

Xie Cheng was taken aback, Gu Ye was too generous, showing him something from his own sect.He was moved in his heart, so he quickly waved his hands, "Forget it, no need, the book knows me, I don't want to know it."

Gu Ye was already desperate for this heartless person. If he liked it, he would learn it, and if he didn't like it, he wouldn't. Why didn't Mr. Tang beat him to death?

Finally meeting a passing villager, Gu Ye asked with a smile: "Master, what is that?"

Looking at their clothes, you can tell that they are not locals. The uncle asked with a smile: "You two are here to travel? That place is not a good scenic spot. It used to be a brick-burning factory, which was abandoned long ago. The road is very difficult to walk. You two don't go, it's dangerous."

Gu Ye nodded obediently, and after thanking the uncle, he looked at the "tsk tsk" mouth, "No, it's too tiring to climb up."

Xie Cheng had already walked back, "We'd better wait for her to come, it's too hot, go back to the car."

Two hours later, Fu Ximing's wife, Xia Yanjun, came back. Xie Cheng raised his eyebrows and asked, "The distance between the two is not very far. It's a two-hour drive, so you don't usually come back?"

Xia Yanjun laughed awkwardly, "Well, I'm really busy with work."

Her voice was also muffled when she laughed, the laughter seemed to be squeezed out of her throat. There is a saying that "smile with a long voice, but the voice is stern in your throat". Gu Ye knew it was not a good thing when he saw her. Too lazy to talk to her.

Xia Yanjun asked: "Have you found my mother-in-law's body?"

Xie Cheng raised his eyebrows, and said carelessly: "Didn't she come back by herself at night?"

Both of them were frightened, "When she comes back, don't they have to..."

Gu Ye said lightly: "As long as you listen to me, she won't hurt you. Are you ready for the funeral?"

The couple laughed dryly and didn't prepare anything.

Gu Ye said angrily: "Go and prepare now, the linen and filial cloth are all ready, and the old man's shroud and coffin, don't you all prepare for this?"

Fu Ximing hurriedly said, "I'll prepare right away."

"Just the two of you, what about the funeral? Find someone to help, isn't there a lot of neighbors here?"

Fu Ximing said in embarrassment: "They don't come, they are all afraid."

Gu Ye said with a cold face, "They don't dare to come, so they go to invite them, kowtow to invite them from house to house, do you need me to teach you this kind of thing?"

"This...going to kowtow?" Xia Yanjun's facial features were all wrinkled, what kind of thing is it to kowtow to someone she doesn't know!

Xie Cheng couldn't stand it anymore, "If you want to survive, do it and invite everyone over, especially the elders in the village. Do you have to sew your filial piety clothes yourself?"

Xia Yanjun asked dissatisfied: "How can there be such a troublesome funeral in this era?"

Gu Ye asked back: "In this day and age, how can you still make my old lady so angry that she pretends to be a dead body? If you don't do this, can you calm down her old man's anger?"

Although Xia Yanjun was wronged, she also knew that she was unreasonable. In order to resolve this matter, she had to swallow her anger.

Fu Ximing quickly smoothed things over, "We'll go there in a while, what else should we do?"

Gu Ye said lightly: "Invite the helpers back and buy everything. In the evening, you two will kneel at the door in sackcloth and mourning to pick up the old lady."

Xia Yanjun was a little annoyed. Just as she was about to speak, Fu Ximing grabbed her, "Stop talking, we will listen to Master."

Gu Ye glanced at Xia Yanjun, "Go hire someone now, you won't be free tomorrow, so be mentally prepared."

The two returned to the car and sat. Gu Ye called home, "Mom, I won't be going back tonight. The family doesn't need to look for me. It will take at least two days to go back."

Mrs. Gu said worriedly: "Be careful, if you can't do it, buy some gastrointestinal medicine and prepare it first. Don't eat the food in the mountains and get diarrhea."

Gu Ye didn't know whether to laugh or cry, did he really give up the fourth child with his mother's posture?My son is coming!

After hanging up the phone, Gu Ye asked Xie Cheng: "What are we going to eat tonight, there is not much left."

Xie Cheng smiled at Mimi, "I have already checked the nearby restaurants and hotels. After leaving this small mountain village, there is a resort sixty kilometers north, where you can eat and live."

Gu Ye was speechless, "Are you rich?"

"You have it!"

"I didn't, please tonight!"

"I invite... I can only treat you to instant noodles, a luxury tonight!" Xie Cheng patted his thigh and said excitedly, "Two pieces of ham per person, plus a pack of spicy sticks!"

Gu Ye Fu forehead, how poor is it?

----

Fu Ximing and his wife went to kowtow to their neighbors together and asked someone to help them. Now because of the death of the old lady, every household is afraid and no one wants to come. But the neighbors in the neighborhood have been around for so many years, and the couple kowtow when they enter the door , said so sincerely, and heard that the master was invited, and the neighbors couldn't save face, so they hesitated for a long time before saying: "Okay, I'll go there in a while."

After finally inviting one, the couple went to another house to kowtow.It took two hours to invite the elders in the village and those who could help, and it was already 04:30.

After coming, the elders asked, "You don't have anything, what do you want us to do?"

Fu Ximing left his wife to entertain everyone, and he took a few people to the town to buy things for the funeral. They didn't come back until almost evening.

While sewing filial piety clothes and filial hats, several old ladies scolded Xia Yanjun, "You were not filial when your mother was alive, you deserved it."

Xia Yanjun blushed with anger, but she had no choice but to drive them away.The more she behaved, the more these old ladies disliked her. They didn't want to say much at first, but now they couldn't bear it anymore. You squeezed a word, and I said a few words, which made Xia Yanjun run out of the house in anger, and swear to her husband, "After this matter is over, I will never come to this village again. The people in this remote village are all troublemakers! If I come back again, I will die!"

Fu Ximing coaxed: "Then you have to get rid of today's matter first, you go and take out all the vegetables I bought, make a table, and invite the villagers who helped out to eat."

"They scold me and I still serve them?"

"We can't feel troublesome, and we can't be afraid of spending money, and don't say anything when we are wronged. Life is gone, everything is gone, you understand."

Xia Yanjun had no choice but to follow suit.However, none of the villagers stayed to eat their meals, and left after finishing their work, leaving a table of dishes on the table.

Xia Yanjun said angrily: "They won't eat it, let's eat it ourselves!"

Fu Ximing stood up, "I'll go and invite those two masters in, let's eat together."

Xia Yanjun rolled her eyes, and muttered in a low voice: "I don't know where to invite two hairless masters, tossing around."

Fu Ximing approached Gu Ye and the others, and asked flatteringly, "You two masters, would you like to come in for dinner?"

Gu Ye held the instant noodles, "No need, we bought it ourselves."

Dinner was invited by Xie Cheng. They went out to find a supermarket, bought a few barrels of instant noodles and ham sausage, and borrowed pots from the villagers to boil a few bottles of mineral water. They haven't eaten instant noodles for a long time. Very fragrant.

Xie Cheng opened a box of canned food left over at noon, and said coldly: "Our master Gu has a delicate stomach and can only cook with mineral water for meals. He feels sick and has diarrhea after eating your meal. Please go back."

Fu Ximing knew that they looked down on him, so he left in embarrassment, feeling unhappy.Filial piety comes first, and filial piety is a traditional Chinese virtue, but he is looked down upon by everyone because he is not filial.

After eating, Gu Ye and the others squinted in the car for a while, and Fu Ximing came to him again, and asked in fear, "It's already dark, why don't you two sit at home?"

Gu Ye and Xie Cheng got out of the car, went into the house and looked around, everything was ready, the door was open, and there was a small bed with the head of the bed facing the door, it was for the old lady.

Gu Ye pointed to the door, "The two of you will kneel at the door in sackcloth and filial piety, waiting for the old lady to come back."

Because Fu Ximing persuaded his wife again during the meal, his wife no longer resisted, and the two cooperated to get dressed, kneeling at the door tremblingly.

Gu Ye and Xie Cheng each moved a stool and sat in the yard, waiting for the old lady to come back.Seeing that it was past eleven o'clock, the kneeling legs of the couple were numb, and a cat meowed from outside the door.

"Come here, she's back." Fu Ximing was so frightened that he trembled, his wife wanted to run away.

Xie Cheng tapped the leg of the chair with a whip, "Don't move, kneel well, whoever moves your mother will catch him first!"

The couple were so frightened that they knelt down and dared not move. The figure of the old lady ran in quickly, and her movements were unusually quick. Seeing the son and daughter-in-law in sackcloth and filial piety, they were obviously stunned and stood still.

Xie Cheng jumped up excitedly, "Fuck, this is the legendary walking corpse? It's the first time I've seen it! It's really a cat face! She looked at me! Gu Ye, she looked at me! What should I do?!"

The corner of Gu Ye's mouth twitched, "Shut your mouth! Scared her away! Catch her!"

"How to catch the walking corpse? I haven't caught it!"

"Catch like a ghost, where's your whip?"

"Okay!" Xie Cheng threw out the whip in his hand and wrapped it around the old lady's body. His whip was specially made with something added to restrain evil, which was not comparable to Fu Ximing's fishing net.The old lady struggled a few times, but she couldn't break free, and was dragged to her side by Xie Cheng in the next second.

The talisman paper in Gu Ye's hand immediately flung it out and stuck it on the old lady's forehead, and the old man immediately stopped moving.

Observing her cat face from a close distance, it is even more frightening. The hair on the face is already so thick that it can't be seen that it is a person.Especially the green eyeballs, which became more and more creepy the more you looked at them. The old lady's face was directly facing her son and daughter-in-law, and the kneeling couple almost fainted from fright.

Gu Ye glared at them, "What are you doing stupidly, kowtow nine times, please go back!"

Xie Cheng reminded: "It must be loud, otherwise your mother won't be able to hear you."

The couple were almost frightened to death. After hearing this, they quickly kowtowed their heads. The man kowtowed and cried, "Mom, I'm sorry! I knew I was wrong! My son kowtowed to you!"

Gu Ye and Xie Cheng looked at each other, and carried the old lady back to the bed to lie down.They came at just the right time, the old lady's body didn't ossify or rot anymore, her body was full of ghosts, and the cat's soul had already melted into her body.If she comes a few days later, the old lady will become a zombie completely, the kind that bites anyone she sees.

Gu Ye signaled: "Hold her, I will pull out the cat's soul."

Xie Cheng stood at the head of the bed and pressed the old man's shoulder. Gu Ye squeezed a finger with his left hand, took out a cinnabar pen with his right hand, drew a magic talisman in the air, pressed it on the old man's forehead, and hooked the cat's soul. After staying, pull it out hard.

Naturally, the cat didn't want to come out, so it screamed miserably, and as she screamed, the old man's body also struggled constantly, and Xie Cheng, who was so strong, was about to be unable to hold it down.The thunder light from Gu Ye's left hand struck down, and the cat's spirit immediately weakened a lot. Taking this opportunity, Gu Ye pulled out the soul of the cat and put it into a small bottle.The old man's body didn't move for an instant, and the hair on his face faded away little by little, and he returned to his original appearance.The corpse spots are already serious, and the rancid smell is even more obvious.

Gu Ye said to the couple: "You two knelt down overnight to guard your mother's spirit. The incense can't be broken, and the crying can't stop. Don't try to be lazy. If you let her get up again, no one will be able to save you."

"We know, we're on our knees."

After the scene just now, the couple were both terrified, their legs are soft now, they dare not get up even if they are asked to get up, now what Gu Ye says, they all treat it like an imperial decree, just knelt down like this for a whole night , humming and crying all night.

The next morning, Gu Ye, who had slept in the car, told Fu Ximing and the others: "Get up and move around, have dinner, go to the neighbor's house to invite someone, take your mother's body to cremation, and bury it in the afternoon."

Both of them quietly breathed a sigh of relief. After being cremated, she wouldn't be able to pick up the corpse anymore, and they wouldn't have to suffer.

Xie Cheng secretly reminded: "Don't think that the matter will be over after the burial. After death, the soul is still there? The first seven, three seven, five seven, and there is no end."

The couple were so frightened that their faces changed again, and they collapsed and asked, "So troublesome?"

"Trouble? You can be filial when you are alive, can you have this day? It would be good if you can save the lives of both of you." Gu Ye waved his hand in disgust, "Hurry up."

The two of them knelt for a whole night, almost unable to walk, and their voices became hoarse, they supported each other to find some leftovers, and ate a few mouthfuls indiscriminately.Looking at the old lady lying at the door again, they were frightened and wished they could bury her right away.

The couple gritted their teeth and persisted, and went to kowtow to the neighbors to invite someone. When they heard that the old lady had been found, everyone dared not come.The couple's mouths were almost worn out, and they almost fainted from kowtowing, so they invited a few people over.

The main reason is that the old lady's body is already stinking, and the weather is hot now, otherwise Gu Ye could still torment the couple for a few days.When I went to cremation in the morning, the couple also knelt to see them off, knelt to greet them, their knees were broken.

Fu Ximing's father died early, and his mother had to be buried with his father, and the grave had to be dug up. The couple walked around the cemetery and kowtowed to their parents, crying and crying at the beginning. , is for others to see.When I cry and cry, I really can't cry anymore. I'm so tired that I want to die. I'm so tired of crying.

Finally, the ashes of the old lady were buried, and the couple lay down in front of the grave, unable to get up when they both hit the ground, exhausted physically and mentally, and almost fainted from exhaustion.

Gu Ye stood behind the two of them indifferently, "You two can't handle it now? This matter is not over yet, and your mother is still watching you in the spirit of the sky?"

Both of them knelt there stiffly, and Fu Ximing's wife broke down and cried, "Why isn't it over yet? I don't want to live anymore!"

"Okay then," Gu Ye looked at the grave seriously, "Did the old lady hear that? Your daughter-in-law wants to serve you."

"No! I didn't mean that!" Xia Yanjun was startled by Gu Ye's serious attitude. Could it be that her mother-in-law was really looking at them?She hurriedly kowtowed to her mother-in-law and said in horror: "If there is anything else we need to do, we must do it!"

Gu Ye said indifferently: "It took seven days to walk through a hall of hell, and it took seven to seven days to reach the end. During these seven to seven days, your mother-in-law may come back at any time."

The couple kneeling on the ground turned pale with fright, "Then, what shall we do?"

"It's very simple. You two wear sackcloth and filial piety every day, and kneel for 49 days, until the old man is gone, and then you go back."

When the two of them heard that they had to kneel for so many days, did they want to kneel for a whole summer vacation?Even if the heat is not dead, the skin will peel off, and both of them have expressions of protest on their faces.

Xie Cheng tapped the whip in his hand, rubbed it secretly, and said, "If you want to live, you have to kneel. From now on, during festivals, the first and fifteenth day of the Lunar New Year, don't forget to burn incense and paper. Open it wide, the old man can come back to see you."

The couple was startled by this sentence, Fu Ximing had already regretted it at this time, if he had been filial at the beginning, he wouldn't be where he is today.

Before leaving, Gu Ye opened the lid of the small porcelain bottle and buried it in the old man's grave.Xie Cheng saw it, but didn't ask at the scene. He didn't ask Gu Ye until he left the small village: "Did you leave that cat's soul behind?"

Gu Ye explained: "This cat is raised by the old man. It is an old cat in his 20s. Because the owner died, it was overly sad and died of heart failure. This time, the old man's corpse was also half of the credit. This animal, especially the one that has lived a long time, is spiritual, I told it, if the couple don't do what I say, and don't kneel for seven to seven days..."

Xie Cheng smiled, "This old cat still has to torment them."

Gu Ye smiled, "Yes, and they are not filial, this karma has already been owed, and they will get retribution from their children."

Xie Cheng said with emotion: "I still obeyed that sentence, the old cat sleeps in the room, and it will be passed down from generation to generation."

Sending Xie Cheng back first, Gu Ye also took the opportunity to look at Elder Tang, and told Xie Cheng before leaving, "If you encounter such a disgusting bastard in the future, don't ask me, and deal with it yourself."

Xie Cheng nodded in agreement, but he didn't believe it himself.Just now, he received another "Daddy's ghost wants to kill me" list, which probably isn't a good thing, if you say it now, I'm afraid Gu Ye will end his friendship with him.He decided to hold back until tomorrow.

Gu Ye drove home. His parents were both in his company and hadn't left work yet. Only Gu Yang was playing games at home.The child's pursuit has changed. His life goal has changed from flying a plane to an armored vehicle, then to building rockets and submarines. Later, he became a doctor, a policeman, and a scientist... Finally, the child has set his last goal in life: to Be a professional gamer with ideals, morality and dreams!

Therefore, the child still works hard to play games after his parents beat him countless times.

Gu Ye narrowed his eyes and hooked his fingers at his younger brother, "Fourth, come."

Gu Yang ran over, already taller than Gu Ye by a tip of his head, tall and strong, the only thing that remained the same was the smile on his face, which was clean and pure, with a sunny face.

Gu Ye said deeply: "My stupid brother, you have grown up. As a brother, I have an obligation to let you know the dangers of the world, the complexity of society, and the darkness of human nature."