What is it like to find someone for your ex?

"Guan Qing, I'm getting married on the eighth of next month."

Xie Xu put one hand in his pocket and handed over an invitation card with the other.Guan Qing saw the place where the signature was signed, and the word "Jiang Lu" was written after "Xie Xu".

He doesn't know how he feels.

He couldn't feel his own existence.It seemed at this time that he realized that most of his life seemed meaningless without Xie Xu.Since meeting Xie Xu eight years ago, his life has been marked by the word "Xie Xu".

This is too morbid, he doesn't like it, and Xie Xu must not like it even more.

He opened his mouth to say something, but Xie Xu interrupted him:

"I should thank you.

"Thank you for letting go and letting me meet the right person."

Xie Xu's expression was very sincere, but that kind of gratitude from the heart was too cruel for Guan Qing.

Guan Qing nana said: "It's okay, it's okay, it's best for you to be happy, I wish..."

bless you.

— can’t say it.Because the words that crossed my mind were completely different.

He endured it for a long time, until Xie Xu's back disappeared, and then whispered:

"I don't mean anything, I just like you too much.

"If you are unhappy after marriage, you can, you can come to me."

He is so mean.

Obviously Xie Xu already has a good home and a suitable person, but not only did he not bless him, but he was still coveting him, and hoped that if Xie Xu quarreled with his partner or had a bad relationship, occasionally... he could come and see him .

He can't pick it up, and he can't put it down.

Guan Qing opened his eyes in almost desperate self-blame and helplessness, and saw the small ceiling of the rental house, only to realize that it was a dream.

But this dream was too realistic, and he himself in the dream——

He climbed out of bed and retched against the edge of the sink.

Guan Qing, you are too disgusting.

His original family was destroyed by a third party, and he actually had this idea.He finally still...

Become the person you hate the most.

The show that Xie Xu was on was a live broadcast, and such a big accident should have caused an uproar.But the Jiang family's hands and eyes were all over the sky, and they suppressed it abruptly.

But there are still discussions going on behind the scenes, including mocking Jiang Lu for reposting, scolding Xie Xu for being rude, Xie Xu's fans scolding Jiang Lu and the program team...

And Xie Xu's dismissal of his agent was on the hot search for a while.

He not only fired and sued the agent, but also sued the program group, causing the entire program group to stop broadcasting for rectification.Due to the pressure from Xie's family, Jiang Lu's life has not been easy recently, and he is no longer an eyesore in front of Xie Xu.

——Obviously he won a battle, but he...

Xie Xu looked at the phone.More than half of his mobile phone's memory is used to save Guan Qing's photos, some of which were taken when Guan Qing was not paying attention, and some tourists' photos were taken when they went out to play together.

Guan Qing looked at the camera and smiled happily.At that time, Guan Qing probably liked him very much.

I don't want him to smile like that at other people.

But Xie Xu thought, he can't be so selfish.

Only those who have have the right to be selfish, and he has nothing.

He opened two accounts, one is "Qingqing" and the other is "Xu Xu", using the profile picture of a couple.He chatted with himself while drinking.

He used the account of "Xu Xu" to say some hooligan words, and then used "Qing Qing" to scold him back, or reminded "Xu Xu" to drink less and go to bed earlier.

It seemed that Guan Qing was still by his side.

In their home, sleeping in their own bed, just opening the door with a key to kiss him, hug him, have him.

He found that when people live less soberly, they will be much happier.

Xie Xu held the wine bottle and smiled at the phone: "Baby, come back early when you get tired of playing outside."

"If you're angry, don't just leave without saying a word. What's wrong with me, you tell me, and I'll change it."

"You...at least give me a chance to change."

He trembled and covered his eyes.

Guan Qing didn't know anything about the turmoil on the Internet, he closed himself up, and the rented house and the place of work were on the same line.

He went for a routine physical examination that day, and unexpectedly met a high school classmate named Wu Gui, a doctor.It happened to be four or five o'clock in the afternoon, so he asked Guan Qing to wait and go to dinner together later.

Unexpectedly, within a few minutes, Wu Gui came out and let him in.

Guan Qing was wondering when she heard Wu Gui say, "Your blood routine... white blood cells are a bit too high, and platelets are too low. I suggest you check it again."

Guan Qing's heart skipped a beat: "This is..."

Wu Gui said: "It's not certain yet, and your excess is not serious, so it's unlikely—well, it might be leukemia."

There was a "boom" in Guan Qing's brain, and the whole person was stunned.

The first thing he thought of was Xie Xu.

If, if he knew that he might get sick and die soon, why bother to make this situation with Xie Xu.

If he was going to die, it wouldn't delay Xie for a long time.Then at least let him occupy Xie Xu for a little while before he dies.

Really just for a little while.

Xie Xu didn't even need to remember him, just to accompany him so that he would not leave alone.

Guan Qing is essentially a person who is afraid of death and loneliness.For him, without thanks, no matter where he is, he is alone.

Wu Gui comforted: "It's just a small chance. I'm just being careful. Don't worry too much. Besides, this disease is not incurable. The cure rate is quite high now, and there are many ways.

"Go, please have a good meal."

Wu Gui and Guan Qing are both from a small town in the south, and it was fate to meet each other in S City, so the two went to a famous Cantonese restaurant.

Guan Qing was not in high spirits, but Wu Gui was very considerate, and kept feeding him food, and he himself was very enthusiastic about it.

"Speaking of which, Guan Qing, are you married?"

They are not young anymore, and Guan Qing is still a matchmaker, Wu Gui took it for granted that he had sold himself out early.

Guan Qing forced a smile and said, "We just broke up."

"Oh..." Wu Gui scratched his head, embarrassed, and said, "Hehe, I'm also single, it's okay, I don't discriminate against you."

Hearing this, Guan Qing was a little surprised.Although Wu Gui is a beta, he is tall and handsome, and has a good personality. He said, "If you need it, can I introduce you? No money is charged."

Wu Gui twitched his lips and said, "I don't plan to get married anymore."

Guan Qing saw that he didn't want to continue this topic, so he chatted about other things, the two of them ate and drank, and when they were half drunk, Wu Gui suddenly asked: "Is your ex-boyfriend an alpha?"

In the past, not many people knew that he and Xie Xu were dating, but they probably knew that Guan Qing's partner was not Beta.

Guan Qing nodded, and Wu Gui continued to ask: "May I ask, the two of you broke up...does it have something to do with you being a beta and he being an alpha?"

Guan Qing looked up at him, a question that he had never thought about suddenly swept all his thoughts involuntarily.

What if Xie Xu is a beta?

The schools of the three genders were separated during compulsory education, but in college, most AOs have been able to control their pheromones well, so there is a three-sex mixed school.

If Xie Xu is a beta, he is not as outstanding as he is now, just a handsome but not eye-catching ordinary boy.He and Xie Xu may...maybe meet each other in high school or even junior high school.

If so, he will definitely go after Xie Xu, no matter how shameless he is, he must chase him.

They will spend their entire adolescence in copying homework, listening to lectures, playing ball, and falling in love. Guan Qing and Xie Xu are always together.Going out on weekends to go shopping by bike, walking down the street hand in hand, hugging and kissing under the street lights.

Then they lived together, doing ordinary jobs, with a rose in the green onions they brought with them after get off work, and a ring hidden in the birthday cake they made by themselves.

Then get married, adopt a child, stay together, and stay together when you are very old.

Guan Qing stared blankly at Wu Gui, unknowingly bursting into tears.

Wu Gui hurriedly pulled a tissue for him to comfort him.When Guan Qing's mood was generally stable, he hiccupped and said, "My ex was an omega..."

It's a corny story.

Similar to Guan Qing Xie Xu, Wu Gui also met his first love and his ex in college, and the two have been in love for many years.The other party has a prominent family background—presumably, at the moment when betas account for 80% of the population, there are no ordinary families that can raise A and O—and his family looks down on Wu Gui very much.

The other party's mother suffered from heart disease and forced her to die, so the two finally broke up.

Wu Gui didn't look for it anymore, he concentrated on his work, and about three years later——

"On New Year's Eve two years ago, I went to the emergency room. When I came home from get off work, I saw him huddled in front of my house, holding a wine bottle and freezing into a ball. He was already asleep, but he was still shaking."

Needless to say the details, in short, the two got back together. "He had a fever for the past few days," Wu Gui looked out of the window and smiled sadly. "At first I thought it was because he had caught a cold that night. When he said that he was going to have a careful physical examination, he actually resisted. I didn't expect..."

It's leukemia.

The other party knew about his illness a long time ago, but he discovered it too late, so he didn't plan to treat it.

"At that time, I hated him very much." Wu Gui covered his face, "He was already leaving, why did he come again? He is a coward, and he dared to look at me only when the sword of death was hanging above his head. "

"But I hate myself more."

Wu Gui took a sip of his wine and said, "If...you didn't listen to other people's gossip back then, if you had watched him more, if you had been bolder, if you hadn't let go, right, everything would have been different.

"After the breakup, he must have had a bad time. Leukemia has so many signs and so many treatments..."

But still reached a point of nowhere.

"Before he left, he held my hand tightly, looked at me, and told me not to forget him.

"His smile was already ugly at that time, but I still felt like a fool. He also said, I regret it, if I could... just spend more time with him.

"I too... regret it."

At the end, Wu Kyu was sobbing.

Probably because it happened right next to him, Guan Qing was overwhelmed with shock and sadness, mixed with panic.

It's too late for Woo Kyu and his ex-boyfriend.

He and Xie Xu... still have a chance?

The two sat in silence for a while, Wu Gui managed to calm down and said, "Sorry, I haven't been able to find anyone to talk about this."

Guan Qing shook his head in a low voice, and Wu Gui said, "If you and him are because of gender or something else..."

He looked deeply at Guan Qing and said, "The feeling of regret is very painful. I don't hope that you will be like me in the future."

During the few days of waiting for the test results, Guan Qing stayed at home and thought a lot.

Mostly about thanking Xu.

The same is true of things like love, not worrying about scarcity but inequality.When two people stay together, they always have to wonder who loves more, and it will inevitably be tiring.

Guan Qing was very tired.

He's just a normal guy.Staying at home with such a treasure like Xie Xu inevitably felt a little uneasy, like suddenly winning the first prize in a lottery ticket. I have never been so lucky in my life.

So he got used to accommodating, used to love a little more, got used to... Xie Xu doesn't have to be him.

And almost everyone around him said that Xie Xu would live better if he left him.Later, this consciousness has been deeply rooted in his mind.

She said that the reason for breaking up was to thank Xu Hao, and she didn't tell him the reason because she was afraid that he would blame himself.

Guan Qing thought, is he really so great?

The day I went to the hospital was cloudy.

Guan Qing took the folder containing the inspection results and called Xie Xu:

"Hello, thank you? I'm Guan Qing."

There was a sound of a wine bottle falling to the ground, and after a moment of silence, Xie Xu answered in a hoarse voice: "Yes."

Guan Qing pondered for a long time.

While shaking his hand to open the inspection result, he said: "If, if you and Jiang Lu are not together..."

He took a deep breath and asked, "Can I see you?"

I want to see Xie Xu.

The kind of emotion that almost exceeded his expectations surged in his chest, which made him realize so desperately at this moment that he was still the same as before... He liked Xie Xu, so much.

Even if Xie Xu doesn't love him.

He dropped the file bag and turned to the inspection results.

--Negative.

At the same time, Xie Xu choked with sobs and replied: "...OK."

----

Country M, the airport.

A man dragged his suitcase and walked towards the security checkpoint. Pedestrians looked sideways.

His peach blossom eyes give people a gentle and affectionate feeling, but his expression is very indifferent, mixing into a very charming temperament.

As he passed a poster, he stood up.

The poster is an advertisement for a certain male watch. The man on it puts one hand in his pocket, looks down at the camera, and smiles handsomely and naughtily.

The man pulled the corner of his mouth and said in a low voice: "Thank you Xu.

"My things should be returned."

The author has something to say: canine leukemia?It does not exist, this article is just an ordinary love essay hhhh

The debt collector has finally appeared. Let us look forward to what useful performance he will have.

In other words, I plan to dabble in metaphysics at two o'clock tonight, so there is a high probability that I will drop a new chapter tomorrow morning

small theater

"My things should be returned."

Xie Xu: Hello, 110?There are malicious harassing phone calls from loan sharks, I have never borrowed from loan sharks, how strange...

"..."