The daily life of the Analects and Tao Te Ching

April 7

cloudy weather

Today's Weibo is still very lively, everyone seems to be very interested in me, and can ask many interesting questions every day.

At first I answered seriously, but they thought I was joking instead.

Later, I played it casually, but these guys took it seriously.

For example, they always like to ask me about my background.

I told them at the beginning that I was the book spirit of "Tao Te Ching", and I came here to accompany the book spirit of "The Analects of Confucius" on vacation. I would appear in the game hall that time to experience life in the 21st century.

It is clear that every sentence is true, but those guys say that I have a second childhood illness, and they pretend to be other book spirits to tease me.

"Hello, Tao Te Ching, I am The Book of Songs."

"Hello Tao Te Ching, I am the Bible. I like to make friends with you."

"Hello, "Tao Te Ching", I am "San Zi Jing". Have you ever heard of 'human nature is good at the beginning'?"

They pretend to be "Book of Songs", so I won't say anything, after all, Xiaoshi has been relatively active recently.

But what about the Bible and the Three Character Classic? !

The former is not in the same system as us, and the latter has no book spirit at all!

I posted screenshots of these conversations on Weibo.

I thought that someone would share my hatred with me, but what I got was a full screen of "hahahahahaha".

They actually call me a sand sculpture blogger!Where am I like a sand sculpture?

Later, my memory grew, and when they asked me that question again, I purposely gave some unconscionable answers to express my dissatisfaction. I didn’t expect to be made into a collection by the good-for-nothing, and even more people “hahahahahaha” when I posted it on the Internet. .

"Oh my god! What kind of fairy blogger is this? I'm a fan~"

"It's just a sand sculpture of a fairy, who has contracted my laughter for a whole year."

"Hahahahahahaha, I laughed so hard."

"'If you're a smart person, I'm in your heart; if you're a fool, I'm sorry you don't have a chance.' This sentence is an A! It has become my signature."

"And this one, it's a golden sentence! 'Time is money, and if you waste my time, you're making money and killing me. Be careful, I'll call the police'."

"I have it here too! Last time I sent a private message and asked him what to do when he met a bear child. He said, 'If you don't treat him as a human being when you are young, you will not be able to be a human being when you grow up. For his own good, teach him to be a good human being as soon as possible.'"

"The last time I recommended him to watch the hot-eyed idol drama played by X Fresh Meat, he said, 'There is only one thing I admire about you guys, and that is that you have the nerve to publish this kind of thing. He has a thick skin and a strong psychological quality. Convincing.'”

They kept urging me to post more fun stuff, but I had absolutely no idea what to post.

"Why don't you ask them what they want to see?" Kong Lun suggested.

He said that there are many classics in foreign countries that answer questions and solve doubts based on the current difficulties faced by people, and some classics have even developed sects specifically for this purpose.Anyway, I have nothing to do at home, so I can just try to start such a business.

"In today's terms, this is called being in line with international standards." He laughed.

I have no interest in starting a business, but as Kong Lun said, being idle at home is also boring, so I asked a question on Weibo.

As the saying goes, one is to stir up waves, but in the blink of an eye, I received hundreds of suggestions.

"Explosive photos!!! I want to see the explosive photos of fairy bloggers!!!"

"Hahahahaha, you can post anything, I feel that no matter what the blogger posts, I will hahahahahaha."

"One person's blood book!!! I beg bloggers to explode machine tutorials!!!"

"Ahhhhhh! Tutorial!!!!!!!!!"

"I want to see the blogger's daily life."

"I beg the blogger to contribute some more embarrassing sentences!"

……

After reading their comments, I feel like I don't even know what to post.

Explosive photos?always feel a little strange;

Explosion machine tutorial?I have already told them what should be said, and the rest can only be experienced by themselves;

As for daily life... I really don't think my daily life has anything to share.

Kong Lun looked like he was going out. I asked him where he was going, and he said he was going to work part-time.

part time……

He seems to have said that part-time jobs are the easiest and quickest way to understand this era. I have been here for so long, but I have never tried it.

"Can I go with you?" I asked.

Kong Lun looked a little surprised, probably because he didn't expect that I would take the initiative to ask to go out.

"Let me go and ask for you," he said.

It may be that everyone described the lucky game currency too miraculously. Now I have a kind of mysterious self-confidence, and I feel that I can definitely get what I want.

As it turned out, my hunch was correct.

Kong Lun's part-time job this time is in a haunted house, but he is in charge of selling tickets, and I am in charge of playing ghosts.

They told me that the content of the job is very simple. When someone comes over, it is enough to scare them. As for how to scare them, I have to use my own imagination.

In addition, try not to have physical contact with tourists.

It is said that Zibuyu is strange and distracted. I don't understand why Kong Lun would find such a job.

"Because it looks very interesting." Kong Lun said with a smile.

He patted me on the shoulder and said that he believed that I would fulfill my mission.

But when I saw the props prepared for me in the store, I seriously doubted that Kong Lun's smile had any deep meaning.

Did they misunderstand ghosts? !

What's the matter with this sexy and coquettish short skirt with hips? !

"No way, the person who asked for leave today happened to be playing the role of a nurse." The person in charge of the props said, "If I want to use other costumes, I have to open the cabinet to find them, which is very troublesome."

It's not a matter of trouble!The point is that I can't even wear this dress!

Later, under my repeated insistence, the other party gave up the idea of ​​letting me wear women's clothing, and found me a white robe with red paint on it.

"It's hard to get the opportunity to dress up and uprightly as a woman, but you don't know how to cherish it." The man muttered.

Is this man sick? !

I complained about this incident on Weibo, but the comment area was full of "hahaha".

What's so funny about this kind of thing!

"Oh my god, I laughed so hard! I couldn't help laughing out loud in the office."

"Hahahahahahahahaha, I shouldn't be checking Weibo while drinking water."

"The treasure blogger finally has an update! Congratulations!"

"Put on women's clothing, you will open the door to a new world!!!"

"No picture, no truth, I want to see bloggers wearing hip skirts (～￣▽￣)～"

"Hahahahahahahaha, the fairy sand sculptures really won't let me down. But why would a blogger go to a haunted house as a temporary worker? Wouldn't it be easy to eat and drink if you go to Macau to show off?"

"Visual guess is that the blogger is saving travel expenses to Macau."

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"

I couldn't help laughing out loud at the comments they posted.

The haunted house was pitch dark, and I had to use a flashlight to keep myself from tripping over obstacles on the ground.

At this moment, there was a scream in front of him.

I subconsciously looked towards the source of the sound, and the dazzling light seemed to blind my eyes.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!"

"How to get out?!"

"Damn it?! Didn't Gonglue say that you won't meet ghosts in the corridor?! We triggered the mobile NPC"

The temperature of the air conditioner in the haunted house is very low, and there is a feeling of gusts of wind.

"Do you know where the third operating room is?" I asked.

According to the staff's instructions, I should be on standby in the third operating room.But I walked around the haunted house several times, but I couldn't find the place.

The people on the opposite side were silent, and after a while, a voice whispered: "Go straight along this road..."

Before she could finish speaking, someone covered her mouth.

"Have you seen a horror movie? Can't answer the ghost's question!" Another person said.

I watched them quietly, and the scene was a little awkward.

Speaking of which, just now the staff seemed to say that if you see tourists, remember to scare them, but the chasing range should not exceed the third operating room... Now I haven't found the third operating room, but I see tourists, do you want to scare them?

"Why didn't he move?" asked a person on the opposite side.

"Gai heard that those who are good at maintaining life will not encounter a tiger when traveling on land, and will not be attacked by armored soldiers when they enter the army. A tiger has nothing to throw its horns at, a tiger has nothing to do with its claws, and soldiers have nothing to hold its blade. Why? Because there is no place to die." I said .

"What?" The person on the opposite side looked confused, as if he didn't understand what I was saying at all.

I sighed and explained: "Although I really want to scare you, this is not your place of death."

My workplace is in the "Third Operating Room", so if I'm not in that location, I shouldn't need to scare people, right?

Thinking of this, I silently walked past them and continued to look for my "third operating room".

"what's the situation?"

"I don't know, but the staff here are so educated."

"That was a script setting, right? Looking for a doctor in the operating room?"

"This setting seems a bit cute."

"Why don't you go and have a look?"

In this way, I obviously played the role of a ghost, but there was a long "tail" behind me.

"This is the third operating room!" Suddenly, the person behind said.

I looked up and saw "Ⅲ" written on the door.

The "three" here is written vertically?No wonder I can't find...

After finding the place of work, I walked in happily, and the tourists who followed me also flocked in.

Logically speaking, what I want to do is to scare people who accidentally stray into this place.

But there are so many people on the other side, and I am single-handedly, what should I do to scare them all away in one go?

Countless scenes from horror movies flashed across my mind, but none of them were easy to implement in such a crowded environment.

I decided to look it up online, but as soon as I turned on my phone, the lights in the operating room went out.

It was pitch black all around, only the phone screen exuded a faint fluorescent light.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!"

Everyone screamed and fled out, and the operating room was suddenly empty.

I sent a message to ask Kong Lun what was going on, and Kong Lun said that someone just boiled water in a special socket in a haunted house and accidentally tripped it.

"Are you okay over there?" he asked.

"It's okay. It's fun to be a ghost." I said.