Handsome guy, just follow me

I don’t know how I am now on Zhihu to ask questions. How can I see the sun the next day after my parents have witnessed the whole process of molesting my boyfriend in public?

Although I came out of the closet with my family right after I graduated from university, but I have kept myself clean for so many years. If it weren’t for the fact that the two of us have the same focus of attention when watching dog-blooded dramas with Dr. Tang occasionally, she once suspected that I might be too troublesome to get married and have children. I didn't hesitate to blackmail myself to try to be quiet. I never expected that one day my parents would see such an impactful scene to prove my son's true sexual orientation. I feel sorry for my parents and myself.

Now the situation of anti-pornography and anti-illegal activities is so severe, I, a sinner, will definitely not be able to escape the judgment from the people. After a brief introduction, the air fell into a dignified silence. I looked around and the remaining three people in the room didn’t look very good, and sighed resignedly. In this situation, if I don't jump out to attract firepower, this silent film may last forever.

"Dad, Mom, didn't I tell you that I would go home next weekend? Why did you make a special trip and didn't inform me in advance..."

Doctor Tang snorted like a flower in a high mountain: "What? Notify you in advance so that you can change the play temporarily? What a pity, my son will really hurt people if he misses such a wonderful performance. Knowing that his mother recently I don’t even feel like watching TV dramas, so I don’t hesitate to go to battle in person to inject a little fresh excitement into the ordinary life of my mother.”

My dad lightly touched my mother's elbow, and said in a low voice, "It's almost done, it scares the two children so much that they dare not speak."

Before I had time to give my dad a thumbs up, Dr. Tang avoided my dad's hand in distaste, gave him a glance and said, "Shut up! I'll give you the microphone and you can sing, okay? There's only dad in the world? I have to worry about my son's fractured life." I can't take care of myself, and I'm delusional to give the patient a surprise. I'm satisfied now. I don't know if you like it or not. I'll definitely cover the surprise part for you. Look at your precious son again, he is not human at all. Please remember, the pig’s trotters are very strong, and they are more flexible than uninjured people when they play hooligans. Is it because I am scared that people dare not speak? It is obviously because you have disturbed their good business by coming uninvited..."

"Okay, okay, it's all my fault, blame me, blame me, don't be angry, don't compromise your noble and elegant temperament for this kind of heartless brat."

Dad didn't forget to wink at me after he finished speaking, and I understood what he said and immediately answered: "My dad is right, don't judge me like a brat, every mistake is my fault."

"Auntie, drink some water first."

Tan Hu's whole person is as usual, I don't know whether he is really calm or just pretending. My mother took the teacup, took a sip to save face, and glanced at Tan Hu. Pulled out of the state of firing, and regained a little bit of dignity as a senior school doctor.

"Mom, how did you know I had a broken bone? Could this be the legendary mother-child bond?"

My mother ignored my mindless kneeling and licking, she rolled her eyes at me, and turned to my dad for help, and the latter acted as the spokesperson with empathy: "Don't you remember the circle of friends you posted yourself?"

"When do I..."

When I was short-circuited, Tan Hu suddenly realized and whispered, which instantly awakened my memory—the morning after Tan Hu gave up cos Cinderella, I was full of satisfaction when I finally tasted the cake that I was thinking about, and sent a message A circle of friends with "consummate merits and virtues", compared with an easy-to-understand "yeah" by the way, directly holding the right hand with plaster in the mirror is out of habit, and the second is that after the shooting, it feels cool and refreshing The collision between Dobby and Alternative Punk fits my state of mind at the time, and I really want to praise my excellent self.Not long after posting in the circle of friends, Chen You immediately sent me a private message and said: Do you think someone will believe you if you make a mosaic to express that you are 1?Wake up, Sao Nian!Put this bastard in a dark room for three days.

... So, after a long time of trouble, it turned out that I got carried away and forgot to group into groups, and then alarmed Dr. Tang to visit, wanting to slap my stupid self.

"Do you really regret not blocking me and your dad?" My mother said leisurely.

May I ask Dr. Tang if you can stop being so sharp?

"Nothing!"

After resolutely denying it, I tried to change the subject and flattered me: "Dad, Mom, have you had dinner yet? Actually, we are planning to cook, why don't you sit down for a while, and wait until I show you something, and you are full." How about you continue to interrogate me?"

Doctor Tang snorted again, and said contemptuously, "At your level, how hungry am I that I will indulge myself to eat until I'm full? Besides, aren't you handicapped? Can you still cook? Can you still eat what you make? "

My mother is my own mother, and she is always so perceptive.I climbed down the pole and told my mother Amway about my boyfriend who suffered an accident today: "Actually, I only hurt one finger. It's nothing serious, but Tan Hu has been doing the cooking recently in order to take care of me."

Doctor Tang turned to Tan Hu, and his tone softened a lot: "Xiao Tan can cook? Yes, much better than Ye Han."

Tan Hu: "Uh..."

"It must be stronger than me!"

I snatched away his words, fearing that the child would be too honest and say something surprising, so I gave a comforting look and watched my brother brag for you.

"He has much more experience in cooking alone than I do. He is a tenth-level housework expert. He can go to the hall and go to the kitchen. He is also an athlete. He lives a healthy and regular life. Also, he is also very good at work. After a few years, the bank All human labor is replaced by machines, and people can still be in the heyday of their careers..."

I gave full play to my professional skills with a bright tongue like a flower, and strongly acted like Tan Hu's brainless bragging in front of my parents. I pretended that my parents had an expression on why such an excellent guy would like you. I pretended that I didn't hurt the slightest Self-esteem, I can’t help it, the meeting today is too embarrassing, my image has fallen to the bottom, I can’t drag Tan Hu down anymore, if he turns out to be ashamed and angry and doesn’t treat me well, where can I go to reason?From this point of view, the matter of me visiting Tan Hu's parents in Doraemon pajamas can be said to be quite fresh, pure and innocent.

"It's not that exaggerated, I'm just doing it blindly..."

Tan Hu, who had been calm all night, gave me a complaining look, and I patted his thigh twice to signal him to relax. Don't I understand Dr. Tang?Don’t think I didn’t see the food bag in Old Tang’s hand. I could smell the aroma through the thermos. The old couple obviously came prepared to care for the wounded. I said I would cook it myself. It's pretending to be blind and acting good, not to mention it's the first time we met, Dr. Tang has the burden of an idol, and if she is killed, she can't do the thing of sitting around and ordering Tan Hu to work. I can be in front of my parents To earn enough goodwill for Tan Hu, and to eat the delicious food made by Dr. Tang without any effort, I really want to tell Tan Hu not to be nervous, everything is under control, this wave of steady profits will not lose, we just have to have fun secretly.

Sure enough, Dr. Tang spoke cooperatively: "It's getting late, it's a bit late to prepare dinner now..."

I suppressed the corners of my mouth that were about to turn up, and tried my best to maintain the posture that a sinner should have. The arrogant Dr. Tang is really cute.

"Then Xiaotan, you will be a little tired. Let your uncles and aunts taste your handicrafts. We don't eat much at night when we are old, so you can just make whatever you usually like."

Nani?Doctor Tang, how could you not follow the script I gave you?Mother, are you really here to tear down my platform?

There was a moment of silence in the room.

Tan Hu and I looked at each other, he looked at me beggingly, his eyes made me feel weak, I decided to expose the truth: "Mom, didn't you come here specially to deliver food to me? Ah, no matter how good his skills are, can he compare with yours? Besides, it's almost seven o'clock, and you always eat early, and I'm afraid it will be too late when he finishes his busy work, and it's not good to hurt your and my dad's stomachs!"

"The dog's nose is really good. You can put it in the refrigerator and eat it tomorrow. You have praised Xiao Tan's craftsmanship so much that we are all here. Wouldn't it be a pity not to try Xiao Tan's craftsmanship? Besides, I didn't tell Xiao Tan Tan Shao, why don’t you cook something, just make three dishes and one soup, it won’t take too much time for Xiao Tan to be so capable, if you want to improve efficiency, I’ll send him a helper, Lao Ye, go to the kitchen and help Xiao Tan .”

Lao Ye who was hit by a bolt from the blue: "..."

"Or is it that Xiao Tan finds it inconvenient?"

Doctor Tang used his final trump card and aimed at Tan Hu, "You young people are usually very busy at work, and you have to be distracted to take care of Ye Han in the past two days. It is very tiring. Auntie understands. Auntie just feels a little pity. , or I'll do it..."

After speaking, he pretended to be ready to stand up, and Tan Hu hurriedly stopped him: "Auntie, please sit down, I am not inconvenient, really, I will do it now, just don't listen to Ye Han's nonsense, my The level is really not good, if you don’t do well, please bear with me.”

Doctor Tang finally showed a satisfied smile: "This child is much more humble than our Ye Han."

No, Dr. Tang, you can think too much, he really has no humility, you will regret it!

I cruelly turned my head away and pretended not to see Tan Hu's reluctant eyes. I'm sorry Tan Huhu. In front of Dr. Tang's absolute authority, I can only make decisions for you with the size of my thumb. I didn't see the weight of my father's death. pace?Gathering together the two generals around me who were blacklisted in the kitchen, and wiped a tear for my kitchen in advance, I always felt a sad omen of doom.