He doesn't know today

During the summer vacation, Lao Wei suddenly took the initiative to contact me.

On the phone, his tone was cautious.

After talking a lot, before hanging up, he suddenly asked: "Do you want...to see her?"

I hesitated for a moment and agreed.

I thought my grandma would object, but she just snorted and told me to come back early.

It was five or six years ago when I saw my mother was still applying for household registration.That city is only a two-hour drive away from us, but Wei still insisted on coming to pick me up.

It happened to be noon when I arrived at my mother's house. The apartment is not big, and the furniture layout is also very ordinary, but there is an atmosphere of everyday warmth everywhere.

My mother heard the movement, came out of the kitchen, and bumped into me.She looked excited, but also seemed a little scared.

I stood at the door, not knowing what to do for a while.

Until Lao Wei said: "Mom, let's eat first."

His "Mom" made me feel a little uncomfortable, but it also brought me back to reality.

The dishes on the dining table obviously exceeded the weight of three people, she still said helplessly: "I don't know if you like it or not, so I just made this..."

"Enough." I took her rice spoon and motioned for me to do it myself.

She stopped her hand in place for a moment, then slowly put it down, her eyebrows and eyes drooping.

I saw it, hesitated for a moment, and said, "Let me help you serve the meal."

She opened her eyes wide, and when she handed over the bowl, she suddenly whispered, "Yu Yuan has grown up."

I paused for a moment, pretended I didn't hear it for a second and continued to serve the meal.

During the meal, my mother kept bringing me food, and Lao Wei sat next to me, eating without saying a word the whole time.

She cut off that long hair at some point, the years are very gentle to her, she still looks dignified and beautiful at this age.

During parent-teacher meetings in elementary school, my classmates always said that my mother was gentle and beautiful, but who knew she would pull my ears from behind.

Just like Lu Guican.

Damn, thinking of him again.

I was in a daze, and there was a peeled shrimp in the bowl, and my mother looked up with a worried expression, "Are you not used to eating it?"

I shook my head quickly, "No, no."

I wanted to say that I don't have to be so careful with me, but it seemed that it would be embarrassing to say so, so I simply chewed my meal quietly.

After the meal, I was fidgeting in my seat and found an excuse to go to the balcony to digest food, but in fact I was in a daze.

Old Wei followed and lit a cigarette, "Do you mind?"

I shook my head, thinking that you were all pumped up, and asked me if I mind.

"I heard that she beat you when she was a child?" Suddenly, Old Wei asked.

I froze, not knowing what Old Wei meant, "No, at most, I pulled my ears."

It was usually my dad who actually did it. My mom lifted the hanger, but they never hit me in the end.At first I was afraid, but then I realized that the hanger would not fall on me, and I gradually got used to it, but sometimes I was scared by the loud noise.

"Hmm." He shook the cigarette ash, looked at the kitchen before asking, "Do you still blame her?"

I didn't say anything.

Is it strange?It's not normal to blame.

I think I should blame her for many things, but as I grow up, it gradually fades away.What I will never forget is the fact that she lied to me.

Old Wei said, "Liu Yuyuan, I actually owe you an apology."

I looked at him in surprise, and he continued: "My dad was seriously ill at the time, and she took care of us at home until the last moment."

It dawned on me that I realized that the atmosphere of the master was indeed missing in this room.

Old Wei said: "I thank your mother, but I also feel sorry for you, do you understand me?" He took a breath, "From my point of view, of course I hope you forgive her, but I know it's bad for you. It's so unfair."

"I don't really care." I rubbed my nose.

I have been heartless for a long time, and I have long forgotten.

......

After my mother washed the dishes, she washed a lot of fruit and asked Wei Siyuan to go downstairs to buy some snacks.I refused in every possible way, but Old Wei waved his hand and told me to sit quietly.

The scene I was most worried about came, alone with her.

Fortunately, she only asked about the situation at school, and I answered them one by one, feeling uneasy.

During the question and answer period, my grandma hung up the phone and asked me when I would be back. I looked at the woman beside me out of the corner of my eye and found that she was looking at me without blinking, so I said, "I'll go back after dinner." gone."

After hanging up the phone, she was still staring at me, and I realized that she was looking at my phone.

"Thank you for your hand...the mobile phone." I paused and offered.

She smiled gently, "Is it easy to use?"

"Easy to use."

"As long as it's easy to use." The smile on her face deepened a bit.

"Yu Yuan, how have you been these past few years? How is grandma treating you?"

I nodded, "OK."

"Then why can't you even afford to use your mobile phone? I just heard from Siyuan. Is it because you don't have enough money?" She worried.

"No, no." I choked up and explained, "The phone accidentally fell into the water."

She showed a puzzled expression.

This explanation definitely involved a lot of things, so I kept silent and lowered my head pretending to look at my phone.

A family ethics drama was broadcast on TV, the heroine was crying in front of the hero, and the music was sad and awe-inspiring.

My head hurt from the crying, and I tuned the channel manually out of etiquette, so I had to bear it.

My mother was caught off guard at this moment and called me by my nickname, "Yuan Yuan."

Alarm bells went off in my head.

She spoke slowly, her tone was as sad as that of the TV hostess, "It's my mother who is sorry for you."

I have expected this sentence, and I am most afraid of this sentence, because I don't know how to react.

"Mom shouldn't have lied to you, I'm sorry."

I took a tight breath, and for a moment, I heard my own voice, "It's okay, it's been so long."

I hate lying so much I thought it was unforgivable.

Then I discovered that the three words "I'm sorry" can actually send me away.

All I owe is an apology.

......

On the way old Wei drove me back, he asked abruptly, "How are you and Lu Guican?"

I was holding an orange in my hand, which my mother stuffed before going out.I turned the orange around a few times, "It's okay."

"separated?"

I looked up at him.

Holding the steering wheel in his hand, without tilting his head, he just said: "A while ago I asked you to have dinner, and your complacency was almost written on your face, and it's about the same now."

I took out a piece of paper and quietly peeled the orange.

He asked, "Is it because of the beating?"

To tell the truth, it is a shame for Lao Wei not to be a reporter for an entertainment newspaper but to be a teacher.

I still didn't make a sound, and he said again: "It's better to divide it, so as to avoid problems later."

After finishing speaking, he probably felt that he had gone too far, and added bluntly: "I will meet better ones in the future."

I took a bite of the orange, it was sour.

I sighed, wrapped the rest in a tissue, and asked him, "Teacher, I have a question for you."

He didn't seem to like the title very much, and frowned, "What?"

"Do you like someone on the outside or on the inside?"

"Inside." Old Wei paused and replied, "But in the final analysis...it's still different."

I sat up straight, "What do you mean?"

"What you like is actually him." Old Wei said, "Whether it is outside or inside, it is a part of him."

Subconsciously, I squeezed the tissue in my hand tightly, and the orange juice was stained on my hand.

Old Wei heard the movement and asked me to wipe my hands with a tissue.

"But what do you ask me for?"

I paused, "Curious."

"curious?"

"Yeah, it looks like you have a lot of stories, teacher."

"Liu Yuyuan!"

......

In the second semester of my junior year, I was arrested by Chen Yu and taken to a bar a few days after school started, and Wang Ze was also there.

When I look at him, I inevitably think of Lu Guican.

When Chen Yu went to the bathroom, I asked him, "Are you going to practice?"

He hummed and didn't say anything else.

"Lu Guican... how is he doing recently?" It took me a long time to hold back this question.

Wang Ze put down his glass and looked at me with a complicated expression for a while, "He hasn't come to school all this time."

"Always?"

"I haven't been here since last semester."

This was different from my guess, and it made me panic, "Then where did he go?"

"Let's go home." Wang Ze said, "We sent him a message but didn't reply."

On the way back, I told Chen Yu what Wang Ze said, and he looked impatient.

"I'll say it again, Liu Yuyuan, this matter has nothing to do with you!"

I stopped in the middle of my words.

Yes, it has nothing to do with me.

I admit that I still like Lu Guican, but I can't believe that he is the same as me.

At least that's what I thought at the time.

If I hadn't read that book.

A few weeks later, I was exhausted from class scheduling and homework, so I took advantage of the opportunity to tidy up the bookcase when I was looking for books on weekends.

Picking up a novel and seeing the cover clearly, I remembered that this was the book that Lu Guican gave me at the beach.

I haven't had time to look at it since I brought it back, so I'll dig it up before digging it out.

I sighed secretly, and opened the book, and a folded piece of paper suddenly fell from the book to the ground.

I opened the neatly stacked paper and saw a picture.

The painter used a black pen, and there was no trace of pencil on it, so it should be done in one go.The picture is a boy sleeping on his stomach.

I looked at the sleeping boy in the painting and the brown pencil case next to him.

The prototype of the pencil case is on the desk in front of me right now.

After reading it for a long time, I finally noticed a line of small characters below.

"Yu Yuan, you asked me why I didn't draw people, because I think people are the most difficult thing to figure out. But since I met you, I may have regained some confidence."

"I have never painted anyone else, only you."

"Thank you."