go too far

When Jiang Yu arrived at school, he was inevitably late. The teacher who was in class glanced at him, said nothing, and only waved him to return to his seat quickly.

Lai Xu saw him lying down on the table as soon as he sat down, and handed him the note several times but did not receive a response.Even after the get out of class bell rang, he stayed in the classroom on the grounds that he was unwell.

After finishing the exercise and returning to the classroom, He Lin came to look for him once, but it happened that the bell rang for class, so he drove him away to class without saying anything.

It wasn't until noon that He Lin was able to go downstairs to look for someone again.Jiang Yu is usually used to catching up on sleep after meals at noon, and now his posture on the table is the same as usual. For no reason, He Lin slowed down after entering the classroom, even though it was very effective in the already noisy classroom. micro.However, before reaching Jiang Yu's side, he was first dragged out of the classroom by Lai Xu.

Just in time, He Lin also wanted to ask him something: "When did Jiang Yu come today?"

"During the first class," Lai Xu replied, "Today I was depressed all day, and I kept lying on the table."

He Lin frowned and asked, "Not feeling well?"

Lai Xu shrugged: "I don't know. He said he felt unwell during the inter-class exercises, and he didn't go to the infirmary. But he didn't eat just now. I asked him and he ignored me."

He Lin glanced at the people in the classroom again, thanked Lai Xu, turned around and went to the canteen to buy bread.Afterwards, he returned to Class [-], and Lai Xu went to the playground, so he turned Lai Xu's chair in the opposite direction lightly, facing Jiang Yu, and sat down without disturbing him.

Jiang Yu was lying on his stomach facing the window, the hair on the top of his head was facing him.Half of his face was hidden in the shadows, with a slight frown between his brows.Under the tightly closed eyelids, the long eyelashes filled with the warm sun of early autumn moved slightly, and the next second, the eyelids slightly lifted, as if sweeping away a piece of dust.

He Lin moved his hand, and the plastic packaging made a sound when it was pinched.

Jiang Yu rubbed his eyes and looked up at him: "Why are you here again?"

"There is no one in your house this morning. I'm a little worried. Let's take a look." He Lin handed him the food as he spoke, "Lai Xu said you didn't have lunch, so he bought you bread."

Jiang Yu took it and said, "Thank you."

"Are you feeling unwell?" He Lin asked him again.

After a pause, Jiang Yu replied, "No, it's just an excuse for being lazy."

The bread was caught in the palm of his hand, but he didn't open it, and said to He Lin, "Come out for a walk with me."

The sun outside is not to say strong, but it can make people sweat a little after walking for a long time.They didn't take a few steps outside, turned into the room again, and went up to the top floor in the coolness of the laboratory building, but the door leading to the roof was locked, and they sat on the ground on the top steps.

He Lin had never encountered a situation where Jiang's house was empty. There were no cars in the parking space, no one answered the doorbell on the third floor, and the curtains on the first floor were tightly drawn.He vaguely guessed what happened. At this time, there was only one possibility that would lead to this result.

It was just that he was caught off guard by Jiang Yu who broke the silence and informed him, his heart was still tense.

"Grandpa is gone."

The tone was composed, calm, and unmoved.

He Lin went straight to wrap his empty hands around him, as expected, there was a chill.

Jiang Yumu was stunned, letting the other party put his arms around his shoulders.He Lin was probably trying to convey the warmth to him, clenched his left hand behind his back, his thumb kept rubbing the back of his hand, and the thin calluses on his middle finger rubbed against his palm due to writing.However, his tone was not filled with warmth, but instead sank and became even colder: "He passed away due to illness."

He Lin didn't understand the deep meaning hidden behind these words, but no matter what, he knew that he should comfort him. "It will pass soon", "Grandpa will be sad when he sees you like this", and so on, he can think of a lot of verbal comfort, but he can't say a word.So the hand on the shoulder moved to the back of the opponent's head, pressing him on his shoulder.

He can only be his reliance.

Jiang Yu buried his entire face and murmured: "It's my fault."

He Lin whispered in his ear, "No."

Jiang Yu seemed to be dazed, repeating over and over again: "It's my fault, it's me."

It is his ignorance that hurts.

If he hadn't been perfunctory at the time, and if he had put in some effort to ask one more question, he would have known the reason for his grandfather's death, and he would not have been at the mercy of fate when he came back again, unable to recover.

He had a chance to redeem himself, even if it was only a small possibility, he had a chance to change his fate.

But everything has become vain, and the regret at this time has become useless.

He can only hate himself.

In front of his parents, he held back and endured, but at this moment, someone finally came to comfort him, support him, and give him support.

Unable to bear it, he finally wailed.

The man in his arms was trembling, and He Lin patted his back, once, once, as if to comfort a crying newborn.He Lin thought again, who could say otherwise.

At this moment, they are all equally weak.

I don't know how long it took, the crying gradually weakened, Jiang Yu finally withdrew from that shoulder, he wiped away his tears, suddenly felt a little embarrassed and awkward, turned his face away and didn't want to see He Lin.

He Lin took the bread on his lap, unwrapped it, and handed it to him, saying: "I haven't eaten yet, eat the bread first, don't wait until you get sick from hunger, be good."

Jiang Yu took his hand, finally took a small bite, chewed slowly, and turned to look at him again.

"Thank you," he said.

The eyes that had cried were still slightly red. He Lin stretched out his hand, wiped away the remaining tears on the other's cheek, stroked his thumb between the eyebrows, and said to him: "What can we thank you for? If you get tired again in the future, think If you cry, come to me for a while."

Jiang Yu nodded, took the bread from his hand and gnawed it, and listened to him continue to say: "I'm usually lazy, so don't think about it. If you are too lazy to move, don't move, and I will lead you away."

The bread was a bit dry, and he gnawed too big a piece, Jiang Yu suddenly felt that it was hard to swallow.After a long while, he responded, "En."

Three days later, Grandpa Jiang was cremated and buried.

The cemetery has been newly reorganized, and more saplings have been planted around it, but compared with the flowers and plants in the courtyard, it is still not as good.

Seeing a row of tombstones, Jiang Yu recalled that his real self was still lying in the hospital.For a moment, he looked around and looked at the strange names on the surrounding tombstones, but each carried a part of his life.His gaze shifted to the photo above the tombstone, and he thought that he didn't like taking pictures, and he didn't know if he had saved the photo he used when applying for a job. If he wanted to post a serious photo at that time, he might have to cut it from his graduation photo, why not Simply find a time to take another picture and put it on the computer for backup.

But when he changed his mind, he silently sneered, thinking that he should forget it, what should he say after the filming?

"I'm going to die soon, so I'll use this photo on my stele in the future"?

It might scare the parents to death.

He stared at the two who were tidying and cleaning in front of his grandfather's grave, and suddenly felt very sorry for them.

Maybe let them send the gray-haired people to the black-haired people.

But he didn't want to die if he could.

After wearing black gauze and red cloth for a week, it has entered late autumn.

After the funeral, everyone went back to their usual routines. The kitchen on the first floor was filled with oily fumes as usual, but it was inexplicably emptier.

Since thinking about the revolving lantern that day, Jiang Yu has been thinking about a question—since he is in the revolving lantern that he saw when he was dying, it means that after the life he has experienced, is his life just the same? it's over?And, as far as he knew, this revolving lantern was supposed to be a memory of his life, so it would remain unchanged, or did he get an unprecedented opportunity to do it all over again?

"Jiang Yu?"

A soft call pulled him back from his thoughts.

He turned to look at each other.

It was the best season for sugar-fried chestnuts, especially at the temporary stall at the entrance of the subway station near their home. When they got out of the station, there happened to be a pot of freshly baked chestnuts, which was full of fragrance. He Lin bought a big bag without saying a word.

Jiang Yu was too lazy to peel the chestnuts by himself as usual, and now he took the peeled chestnuts from He Lin one by one, happy to be the shopkeeper.

The movements of his hands didn't affect He Lin's mouth at all. He asked, "Why are you always in a trance lately?"

Jiang Yu blinked, bit a chestnut and said vaguely, "Is there any?"

He Lin glanced at him, but smiled and said nothing, as if asking back: What do you think?

Jiang Yu withdrew his gaze, thinking that the recent revolving door incident really distracted him too much. Even his quiz scores dropped significantly during this period. The teacher thought it was the cause of his grandfather's death, and even asked him after class to find him. He talked once about life and death.

It's just that it's inconvenient for him to explain the real reason to anyone. Even when facing He Lin, he can only talk about him.

When they got downstairs, He Lin took the paper bag out of the plastic bag, casually threw the bag full of peeled chestnut shells into the trash can, and then handed the paper bag to Jiang Yu.Jiang Yu opened it to see, but couldn't find any shelled ones.

"Your speed of peeling sugar and frying chestnuts is getting faster and faster." He said in surprise.

He Lin flipped through the keys in his bag, and replied casually: "This batch is fried well, you can open it once you peel it, and after all, practice makes perfect. If there is any competition to peel sugar and stir-fry chestnuts, I will definitely win you a gold cup." return."

Jiang Yu responded with a light smile: "I can get you."

As soon as the words fell, He Lin found the key and inserted it into the door lock.

Jiang Yu stood behind him, took out his mobile phone casually, wanted to confirm the time, but was stunned when he saw the date, and raised his hand to grab He Lin's sleeve.

He Lin was still holding the door with that hand, and looked back at him puzzled.He suddenly apologized: "I'm sorry!"

The voice entered the corridor, and suddenly echoed, and the apology was repeated several times.He Lin laughed dumbfounded, and asked him, "Why are you apologizing all of a sudden?"

Jiang Yu clasped his hands together, looking annoyed, and said, "Sorry, last month was your birthday, I forgot, and I didn't even give you a birthday present."

Not for the first time.He Lin's birthday happened to be a few days after Grandpa Jiang's birthday. He missed He Lin's birthday last time because he was concerned about his grandfather's illness.At the beginning of September, he still thought that he must never forget this time, but the same mistakes happened again.

"Really, I..."

"Stop, stop." He Lin stopped the other party's repeated apology, raised his empty hand, and pinched the other party's lips with two fingers.

He pursed his lips, looked into the corridor, loosened his other hand, and let the door close automatically.He curled his mouth and said, "Then give it now."

Immediately, he leaned down and pecked lightly on Jiang Yu's lips.

"I accepted my birthday present."

It became the same gift as before.

He Lin accepted it as soon as he saw it, and turned around to open the door again, but the key in his hand was suddenly snatched away, and the instigator even said: "It doesn't count."

"It doesn't count as a gift from me." The man added.

Immediately afterwards, he hooked He Lin's neck and pulled him down. His lips touched the other's, but it didn't go deep, but it was a kiss that lasted several seconds.

Jiang Yu said: "This is what I gave you, although it is a bit late, happy birthday."

He regretted the first feeling, and he didn't want to try it a second time.

If you can avoid breaking up in the end, that's the best.But if it is true that it can only be carried out according to the original memory, then at least let him ask clearly.

Ask clearly why He Lin broke up with him in the first place.

Before leaving, he leaned forward again and kissed her.

"This is today's good night kiss, good night."