truth or Dare

Not only at the welcome party, but even in the following days, Xiao Yaowen escaped for a while. Except for the necessary meeting, he and Dou Heng rarely had any ambiguous intersections. Even he himself couldn't figure it out. The person he loved was right in front of him, why did he still avoid seeing him? For this reason, he also found countless excuses for himself, but in the end he still couldn't find any one that could satisfy him.

In fact, Xiao Yaowen really wanted to know how Dou Heng spent his days without him, whether it was just like usual, whether he was there or not, it was actually the same.

Xiao Yaowen can't understand Dou Heng and he can't understand himself, even if the two of them have the same gender, so what, he has never been the type of person who is troubled by his own sexuality, so why is he always hesitant Not before, could it be that it's because you like it so much that you don't even have the courage to frankly embrace the person you like?

In winter, the wind is bitter and cold. Although the south where Xiao Yaowen lives never snows, every winter is still bitingly cold. Only southerners can understand the biting cold.No matter how muddled and lifeless Xiao Yaowen's life is, it will still go on "without hesitation". In a blink of an eye, it will be mid-December, and a year will soon pass.

On a weekend in mid-December, Xiao Yaowen rushed back to his dormitory from the club’s monthly regular gathering. On the way back, he wanted to pick up a courier at the south gate, so he didn't go back to the dormitory with the club members.

Xiao Yaowen is wearing all black, an all-black down jacket and outer pants, and the knitted hat on his head is also black, but it is layered underneath, and there is a flowery English letter in the middle of the layer——brave .

Holding a courier in his hand, Xiao Yaowen passed by the public parking lot behind the library. Although the library and the study room are behind the parking lot, there are few people passing by around. Except for a few cars parked under the orange street lights, only the The restless sound of light and shadow in the library and study room, as well as the occasional footsteps of students passing by.

Xiao Yaowen passed through the public parking lot, walked for a while, and was about to turn to his dormitory, when suddenly a figure flashed out and dragged him behind the heavy tree-shadowed wall.The courier in his hand fell down involuntarily, before Xiao Yaowen had time to react, the person opposite had already embraced him, leaving a heavy kiss on his lips.

Xiao Yaowen panicked and wanted to struggle subconsciously. When he raised his head, the person in front of him turned out to be someone he was too familiar with and missed so much.The person in front of him is closing his eyes, attacking the city, constantly wanting to ask for more from himself.Xiao Yaowen lost his sanity for a moment, and just let Dou Heng around, and when he fully reacted, the pressure and burden hidden in his heart suddenly rushed to his heart.In a panic, he hurriedly pushed Dou Heng away, and roared, "Dou Heng, what are you doing?"

Dou Heng looked at him without saying a word, Xiao Yaowen turned around to leave, Dou Heng grabbed him with one hand, pushed his body away again, and replied without shame: "Kiss you." You have to move towards Xiao Yaowen.

This time, Xiao Yaowen was suppressed by Dou Heng for a long time, unable to move, until Dou Heng took the initiative to let him go, and he regained his freedom.He didn't scold Dou Heng, he just picked up the courier that fell on the ground, picked up the bag, and was about to go away, Dou Heng grabbed him again involuntarily, and once shouted emotionally: "Xiao Yaowen, don't go away !Where are you going?"

Xiao Yaowen ignored Dou Heng's unreasonable troubles, and just threw away Dou Heng's hand. Dou Heng chased after him, and caught up with Xiao Yaowen's hand again. Xiao Yaowen couldn't take it anymore and yelled One sentence: "Damn it! Dou Heng, are you sick!", saying, he dropped the courier in his hand again, and pushed Dou Heng against the wall step by step.

Xiao Yaowen couldn't control his emotions, and cursed again: "Bastard! Dou Heng, what do you want to do?"

Dou Heng didn't speak, and kept staring at Xiao Yaowen in front of him.

The orange light at the intersection reflected the silhouettes of two teenagers. One of the teenagers pressed his hands on the other boy's chest, staring at the opposite boy fiercely. The suppressed boy was also not to be outdone. Confrontation, insisting on winning or losing, but it is also inexplicable, no one knows what they are fighting for.

"What exactly do you want?" Xiao Yaowen asked Dou Heng: "Is it interesting?"

Dou Heng didn't resist, and let Xiao Yaowen in front of him suppress him all the time, didn't say much, just kept looking at Xiao Yaowen in front of him.

"Is it interesting for me to ask you this?" Xiao Yaowen called out.

Suddenly, Dou Heng's eyes widened.

"Let me ask you, is it interesting to play me like this all the time? Far and near, all of a sudden yes, all of a sudden not, is this interesting? If you really can't afford it, don't fuck me! "

"Heh!" Dou Heng laughed, and he said, "Then aren't you? Xiao Yaowen! How dare you say that you never knew that I liked you? You just don't have any feelings for me?"

"What do you mean?"

"What do you mean, don't you know?"

"Bastard!" Xiao Yaowen ignored Dou Heng, cursed directly, and was about to leave.

"Xiao Yaowen, if you have the guts, don't run away this time!" Dou Heng called Xiao Yaowen again.

"Fuck, bastard! Dou Heng, what do you want to do?! Force me to admit that I like you? Even if I like you, so what? Can you guarantee that my liking will satisfy you? Can you guarantee that I like you? Can my liking keep me unfettered and free?" Xiao Yaowen turned around, and approached Dou Heng step by step, wanting to question the weight of the two of them's feelings in Dou Heng's heart.

"Xiao Yaowen, let me ask you, what am I in your heart?"

"Damn it!" Xiao Yaowen finally couldn't hold it anymore: "Damn Dou Heng, if you have anything to say, just say it directly, don't talk nonsense with me around here!"

Dou Heng looked straight at Xiao Yaowen again, and he said: "I don't want to know anything, I just want to hear from you, Xiao Yaowen, who I am to you, friend, brother, or..."

"then what?"

"Still...to you...someone who is different."

When it came to the end, Dou Heng's tone was very helpless, which made Xiao Yaowen couldn't help but look up at him, paused, and wanted to say something, but he still swallowed the words.

He can't satisfy Dou Heng, and Dou Heng has no way to keep him unrestrained and free, since the day he fell in love with Dou Heng, it has been impossible.

"Xiao Yaowen, how did we become like this?" Dou Heng asked Xiao Yaowen.

"I……"

"On the day when the club was recruiting, the two of us came back from eating hot pot, and you asked me, 'Will we be friends forever', I remember I said at the time that even if we broke up because of certain things in the future, We can no longer be friends who talk about everything, and I will still be like before, guarding you and protecting you. I don’t know if you listened to my words at that time. If not, then today I will Let me tell you again, I, Dou Heng, have never regarded you as a friend. Before liking you, no, after liking you, not to mention, don’t f*cking keep using friends as a cover, even you can’t stop me I love you unshakably."

"Dou Heng, you are crazy! Crazy! You can't give me the love and freedom I want, but you still say you like me." Xiao Yaowen felt the corners of his mouth trembling, burning with pain.

As he said that, Dou Heng laughed again, and he said: "That's right, Xiao Yaowen, I'm crazy! Crazy! Congratulations on finally discovering it! Yes, I'm crazy! Crazy! After meeting you, I'm crazy! It's starting to go crazy! I'm not myself anymore... I'm just a psycho, you know? All the time, I'm berating myself for spreading rumors about you, and at the same time I'm hearing people say we're a couple When I was there, I secretly rejoiced in my heart, I am a psychopath, a pervert, and a lunatic, you know?"

"Xiao Yaowen, I am a lunatic, I like you so much that I am crazy, do you know that?"

After finishing speaking, Dou Heng lowered his head again, and wanted to kiss the person in front again, but at the moment when he closed his eyes, Xiao Yaowen suddenly let go of his hand on his chest, and took two or three steps back in a panic.

Dou Heng closed his eyes, paused for three seconds, and smiled again: "So that's the case..." After speaking, he opened his eyes, and without looking at Xiao Yaowen, lowered his eyebrows, and continued: "So...it's not me Okay, so... I can't either."

"I'm sorry, but I was being too sentimental."

"Excuse me, Xiao Yaowen."

After finishing speaking, Dou Heng stood up straight, shuffled, and walked away without looking back.He happened to be wearing Xiao Yaowen's black jacket today, so when his back left, Xiao Yaowen suddenly twitched in his heart, feeling that his heart suddenly became empty, and subconsciously began to call Dou Heng's name, only However, the wind was too strong at night, Dou Heng couldn't hear it, and didn't want to hear it.

In the days that followed, Xiao Yaowen often dreamed of Dou Heng. He dreamed that he and Dou Heng were together. Just in his room, sitting on the carpet in his room, and said to him, "Do you know I'm waiting for you?", dreaming that they were sitting in a classroom that I don't know if it's a university or a high school, time and space are disordered, figures are erratic, only Dou Heng has been sitting next to him, chanting in his ear the phrase "Daughter-in-law" that Dou Heng often yells, dreaming that they were wearing a high school uniform when they were in college, rolled up their trouser legs, rolled up their sleeves, Running like the wind on the high school basketball court, football field, and track field where they had run together countless times, Dou Heng on the court still called that sharp and profound name-"Xiao".

Xiao Yaowen once asked Dou Heng why Laoai called him "Xiao" on the court. Is it not good to call him "Xiao Yaowen"?In Dou Heng's freshman year of high school, not long after he and Xiao Yaowen were at the same table, the former middle school boy answered Xiao Yaowen confidently, "Don't you think the pronunciation of the word 'Xiao' is very similar to 'If you don't accept it, just cut him!" ' Pronunciation? It sounds very imposing!"

Xiao Yaowen still remembered that when he heard what Dou Heng said, he was so angry that he didn't go to the cafeteria with Dou Heng for three days. Dou Heng went in without knowing it. Only Xiao Yaowen felt in his heart that he was being treated as a weapon. How could a second-year middle school boy with strong self-esteem who was called around by him accept such an explanation?

But even so, self-esteem was always simple when he was young. Xiao Yaowen's deliberate alienation did not attract Dou Heng's attention. At that time, Dou Heng was not like Dou Heng today. Whenever Xiao Yaowen got angry with him for no reason, he would always ask why. Youth When I was young, I always thought that an interception and a greeting could bring about reconciliation. It happened that Dou Heng and Xiao Yaowen were sitting at the same table at that time, and they happened to be sitting at the outside table. Go out from inside and threaten: "Unless you make up with me and go to the cafeteria with me, otherwise you don't want to go out!"

They happened to be sitting in the fourth group at that time. The desk they were sitting on was still the old-fashioned desk with two drawers attached. Puberty teenagers who are in puberty can't move freely, so if Dou Heng keeps blocking, Xiao Yaowen really can't get out. He struggled and negotiated for 15 minutes, but Dou Heng couldn't get in. He had no choice but to I am willing to bow down.

Young and inexperienced, but a lie, but it also entered the heart. Back then, he was moody, and he could be relieved with just a greeting. Unexpectedly, after many years, he finally found out that the speaker's lies were true in the end. It turned out that he had already become A weapon in his hand, when he is overcoming obstacles, he can only feel at ease if he holds himself in his hand.

Xiao Yaowen, who woke up in the middle of the night, couldn't calm down. The pattering rain outside the window hit the sycamore tree in front of the balcony. Xiao Yaowen got up and walked to the balcony. The rain splashed on him like freezing points, and he subconsciously The ground shrank back, and there was a thunder in the sky, his heart skipped a beat, and he suddenly said in his heart: "Whatever the thunder strikes him, if one day he really goes with other women, is it a thunderbolt? Is it possible to get it back? He can't be struck by lightning, why the hell should I care about him being struck by lightning?"

Xiao Yaowen was wearing only pajamas, and the wind and rain blew up, making him shiver from the cold. He rushed to the bed and sent a message to Dou Heng, who hadn't contacted him for nearly half a month: "What are you doing lately? In two days I will What are you going to do for your birthday?"

The author has something to say: The weather is very gray today. Let’s celebrate at the second watch. Baby Dou Xiao is together~ The next chapter will officially confirm the relationship~ I will post it later, thank you for the baby who has been chasing updates~ Memojiu~

Speaking of which, when I was writing this article, I felt amazing. I could always think of some stupid things in adolescence. For example, Brother Dou Heng stopped in front of the table to prevent Master Xiao from going out. The author seems to have done it before hahahaha I don’t have any memories. When I wrote it there, I suddenly remembered it. It’s really a story from a long, long time ago~

☆、Chapter 31