【Liai】Horizon

BERLINGER2013.9.4

The content of the email was very simple, and it came by coincidence, it jumped out almost a second before Levi was about to turn off the computer and leave.In the huge office, on the only electronic screen that was lit, a few words sent by Erwin were displayed:

"Levi, try to remember.

In the winter of 2001, did you ever take a train from Behring, Germany to Berlin, perhaps with your father.If so, do you remember anything special that happened when the train arrived at the station? "

Very abrupt question.But if these words come from Erwin, who is always cautious and never does superfluous things, there must be a need to confirm it.So Levi leaned on the swivel chair and closed his eyes, trying to dig out something from the rare chaotic brain.

In 2001, 12 years ago. I was less than 12 years old 13 years ago, but I often travel with my father.He remembered his father's black leather gloves, the first time he saw his father's most cherished gun that year, and he remembered sitting in the train watching the snow covered the world outside the window.

But just remember these.

It doesn't matter whether people remember some things or not. Memory is just a subtle carrier, and the truth is deposited in time.Levi's gut tells him he's missing something important, and he checks the time before calling Erwin.

"Did you remember anything?" The other party asked straight to the point without going around the bush.

"Actually, no."

"Is that so, how is that kid?"

"How else can it be?"

The person on the other end of the phone paused for a moment, as if a little surprised by this sentence that clearly revealed displeasure.

"Oh, is there something wrong with it?"

"No, it's just that you all ask the same question." Levi impatiently took out a pack of cigarettes, lit one, and spit out the first puff on the display screen. "So is Hanji, so is Petra, and there is even Gunda who has only seen him once. Why, why do you all care about him so much? He is just a 17-year-old kid. To anyone yes."

There was no sound from the receiver again, and the smoke rushed into the lungs, causing minimal nerve paralysis.Erwin chuckled, and whispered in his ear, "I thought it was years ago, Levi, back when you hadn't learned to control your emotions."

Levi didn't speak, he took another hard drag on his cigarette, and then stubbed it out.Turn off the computer, lock the drawer, put on the coat and leave.

"What do you want to say."

"He's just a 17-year-old kid, to anyone." Erwin mimics his earlier tone, and Levi frowned.Listening to others repeating it, he could also hear how twisted this sentence was.

"If nothing else—"

There was a faint sigh from the other end of the phone.

"Who crossed the line first?"

BERLINGER2013.9.5

There were few pedestrians on the streets of Berlin in the early morning, and Levi drove back to his residence.He drove a little slowly, the indicator light in front of him changed from green to red, he stopped in front of the zebra crossing where no one had passed, and watched the time pass by bit by bit.

It's past zero, and the number at the end of the date has jumped back by one.The days seem to be so slow and fast that it makes people flustered, and the picture is repeated in the mind repeatedly, but the modifier has changed from "today" to "yesterday".

For example, an hour ago yesterday, Levi drank a cup of coffee that was already cold, which caused a bit of a stomachache.Maybe he came back so late on purpose, Levi didn't deny it.Drive the car to the garage, listen to the echo of my footsteps in the empty basement, and press the elevator button on the floor I live in.How long has it been since you are so proficient that you can complete all the movements with your eyes closed?Three years, five years?

Going to the company, processing documents, leaving get off work, occasionally having dinner with subordinates, driving home, reading, smoking, sleeping.Partying, unknown weather forecast, delayed flights, bullets, negotiations, platinum cards, checks, courting crowds, Scotland Yard agents I met, songs I heard a few years ago, not bad books , a coffee machine that doesn't work very well.Hotel receptionists of different colors, past dying prickly pears on the windowsill.

The world is as normal as it is bad, and as normal as it is lonely.

The key in Levi's hand has already been inserted into the lock, and the door will open as long as he twists it again, but he stops suddenly.He's just pulled off a series of moves that's been going back and forth until this summer, but what's wrong?

If he opened the door, he still saw that innocent smile.If that boy still made up a self-deceiving excuse for himself, for this terrible adult, with unreserved malice, to excuse him.Or, if he fell asleep on the couch with arms folded and a book in his arms, there would still be snacks and notes on the table, as if nothing had happened.

What if so?Can he still carefully carry him back to the room and cover him with the quilt as before.

Levi can't wait to face himself, so he opens the door and sees darkness.Reaching out to touch the wall lamp, he saw two pairs of slippers on the shoe cabinet.

In this empty, clean and exquisite room, the air is frozen under the moonlight, and it is no longer possible to feel anyone breathing.

"Ellen."

"Ok?"

Armin looked at the photo bags piled up on the table, and then at the people who had already huddled under the quilt and slept against the wall.

"Is it okay if you don't go back today?"

"fine."

"What happened? It seems that your face has not been very good."

"Armin."

"Uh-huh?"

"When did you learn to be as suspicious as Mikasha?"

"Ugh?"

What else could Armin say, turn off the light, and sleep with his best friend back to back.In the past, there was a time when I was busy with tasks such as project assignments until very late, and it was common for Alan to stay at his house for a night.

Since we met this afternoon, the boy's emotions were on his face. Since he couldn't say anything to his most trusted friend, it must be something special.Armin made his own decision. For Allen now, the most special thing is that gentleman.

Levi.It was only a brief moment when Armin first saw him.It was just a firm figure from the back, chasing the falling boy and jumping down.

If anyone, because the other party makes a decision in an instant, forget any hesitation about death.

That must be someone special.

"Hey Alan, do you remember calling me one night when you first met Mr. Levi in ​​July?"

After a while, the young man let out a muffled hum.

"Looks like he's in his 20s, always with a cold face. Although he's a small man, he's very skilled. He's in the late stage of cleanliness. I don't know about the others. But I always feel—" Armin recalled the conversation in his memory, recounting the time Alan murmured the sentence.

"It's always reassuring."

Allen pressed his forehead to the brown wallpaper.

"What about now? Has your opinion changed?"

change?

The expected sleepless night, Allen lay beside Almin staring at the blank ceiling in a daze, without falling asleep.After he was sure that his friend had fallen into a deep sleep, he got up, got dressed, and left lightly.

At three o'clock, the urban area of ​​Berlin was empty, and even the vagrants were not seen.Occasional passers-by, swaying voices, or passing cars are all silent in the cool air.On the asphalt road in the streets of the old city, there are only circles of dim lights, and the young man feels cold when he walks through the street corner.Flickering shadows fell on some slightly trembling bodies—maybe it was a certain building, an unmanned car on the side of the road, or a certain tree.He stood in front of the zebra crossing where someone had stopped two hours ago and waited for the red light. The meaningless red light was dazzlingly red.

Have you ever tried a hike that starts at [-]:[-] in the middle of the night?

There is an illusion that the whole world is empty, and he feels sober, maybe because of the temperature, maybe because of his mood.The whole person is determined like never before.It may take him nearly two hours to walk from Armin's house to the man's house.I don't know why I was forced to go back now, and no one stipulated that he couldn't spend the night outside, let alone that it was not a "home" that could have a reason to restrain him.Suddenly I want to ask myself 12 years ago, what is "home" like, but what a five-year-old child can remember.A snowy day, a train from an unknown city?This is not the time to reminisce about lost things.

Are you lamenting your loneliness?

In this way, I forcefully pull my thoughts back to the place where they were originally pinned.Allen hugged his arms, it was really cold, he accelerated his walking speed.I don't know if Mr. Levi went home.

The last time he walked in the moonlight indifferently like this was on the path of Stonehaven, the destination was the seaside at sunrise, where stood the person he most wanted to see.This time the end point is still the place related to that person, but I don't know if he is still there.Missing is a strange thing, and immunity is completed by repeating grievances again and again.

The key went into the lock and did not turn immediately.

He did the same thing as the previous person who opened the door, thinking about the other person without reservation.

Levi is lying on the bed and falling asleep, must have been quite tired from working for several days.Allen opened the door gently, walked to the bed, and quietly watched the man fall asleep by the moonlight in the room.It's not a good idea to peek at other people's sleep, but it's what he wants to do most now.

If there must be a reason, he answered with a light kiss on his cheek.

One has the most raw, defenseless look when one is asleep.Lonely people will purse their thin lips to express their loneliness, anxious people will frowned, and happy people will quietly raise the corners of their mouths.It's a pity that he couldn't see his sideways face clearly, but he seemed to be able to keep a good eye on that gentle and powerful soul.

The feelings he fermented alone were hidden in the dark and quiet room, in the pupils that he dared to approach only when he was asleep.A furtive kiss, a superficial touch, was all his gratitude and the little compensation he needed.

The moment the door of the room was gently closed, the man who seemed to be asleep opened his eyes.There was no sleepiness in his dark eyes, he looked at the corner of the sky with a faint white light outside the window.

Is it almost dawn?

>>>

The school gate was full of freshmen coming in and out with registration documents. Allen yawned and walked through the crowd, and saw Almin and Mikasha waiting for him at the bottom of the teaching building.It's that day again, the third year of studying here.

Entering the third year of high school means that many things have to start again, preparing for university applications or work internship intentions. He really hasn't thought too much about the future.He knew that Almin wanted to be a history teacher, and Mikasha, who was excellent in all aspects, should also have her own plans.

Armin poked his arm, "Hey, hey, when did you leave yesterday, why didn't you say hello to me?"

"It's early morning, I have to go back and pack my things and come to school."

Armin snorted, and glanced at the dark circles under the eyes of the other party, and the tired face covered up.

Ugh……

The class meeting will be carried out according to the usual practice, including the summary of the last semester, the plan for the new semester, the curriculum arrangement, the transfer of the class committee, the distribution of new books and photos of the trip.Alan started to sleep on the table before the head teacher stood on the podium. During this period, he was glared at by the teacher countless times, and he didn't wake up when he was asked to hit his head with a book three times.Mikasha sat by the window with a calm face, as if she didn't notice anything.

The class meeting lasted until 11:30, and as expected, it ended with the head teacher's sentence "Alan, wake up and clean after you sleep well" and the class laughed.Armin shrugged and made eye contact with the boy who had just woken up with red marks on his face.

——I'll stay and help you.

--Thanks!

Looking at Mikasha's seat again, the books and pencil case are still on the table, but she has gone nowhere.

>>>

On the table was a plate of toast, a glass of milk, the latest newspaper and a note.There is only one simple sentence on the note:

"Welcome home, Mr. Levi."

Levi's hand on the tie paused, but he picked up the piece of bread and took a bite.

It was another sunny day, and I didn't allow myself to stay in bed until after noon for a long time.I'm really tired, in every way.Just as he sat down to spread out the newspaper, the doorbell rang.Levi was startled again, why, didn't he bring the key.

Not having much time to prepare his facial expression, Levi opens the door - only to see a strange but not-so-familiar face.

Mikasha Akaman stood at the door, she looked into his eyes, pursed her lips and said:

"Sir, can we talk."