pure white secret

It is a world of eternity and a world of ephemerality.Death is the dividing line.Memories stay with you for a lifetime, and people forget you're dead after a while.

Fifteen days after my parents' funerals, my life took on a new trajectory.Busy morning, crowded subway, hurried pedestrians, laughing guests.Within fifteen days, my status changed abruptly.From a promising high school student to a poor kid who lost his parents to a strong older brother raising a younger brother.

The door of the coffee shop was pushed open, and the mascot hanging on the door shouted 'Welcome' sharply.A group of five or six laughing students walked in.Two of the girls are Yoshihara Rika and Inoue Kiyoko.

They all startled slightly when they saw me, and I was also stunned.

I smiled and said, "Welcome to Dream House Coffee."

Yoshihara and the others chose a spacious seat by the window to sit down, and then Yoshihara and Inoue walked to the bar where I was and talked to me.

Yoshihara: "Takahashi-kun, I really didn't expect to meet you here. Takahashi-kun didn't even participate in the graduation trip. Could it be that he has been working here all the time?"

Me: "Well, yes."

Yoshihara said seriously: "It's strange to say that not only Takahashi-kun, but even Usami-kun didn't participate in the graduation trip together, what a pity."

Me: "As for Qiu Yan, I have never liked such activities, and it is normal not to participate."

Inoue suddenly said, "No, I heard from the teacher that Uzuo Jian-kun was sick at home, so he couldn't participate."

I am sick?"

Yoshihara: "Yeah, the teacher visited him at home, and he seems to be seriously ill."

Inoue: "I heard that Usami-kun lives alone and has no one to take care of him at home when he is sick. I always feel so pitiful for him."

......

In the end, because of Yoshihara's words, I was restless all day.Worried, anxious, anxious and hesitant, he called Qiu Yan a few times but he didn't answer, and he didn't call back after that, Qiu Yan never did this.

He has always answered my calls very quickly, and occasionally sent a message, and Qiu Yan would also call. On days when we don't see each other, talking on the phone is the happiest thing between us.

After a difficult day in a daze, I finally looked forward to getting off work. I changed my clothes and ran directly to Qiu Yan's house.

I have never wanted to see him more urgently than at this moment.However, when I finally saw him, seeing his haggard and pale face, the worry in my heart turned to anger, overshadowing the joy that was ready to explode.

Me: "Hey, since I'm at home, why don't you answer the phone. I can't see you, and I can't get through the phone. Do you know how worried I am?"

Akihiko stared at me blankly, without speaking, turned around and lay down on the sofa, with Mr. Suzuki covering his forehead with one hand on his pillow.

Qiu Yan's house is in disarray.

Clothes thrown randomly on the floor, books scattered on the floor, and an uncleaned kitchen are all expected, but what I can't accept is that there are cigarette butts and empty wine bottles in Qiuyan's house.The room was also covered with a thin and unpleasant choking smell because the windows were not opened for too many days.

What kind of blow did this guy suffer before he hid at home and gave up on himself?

I temporarily gave up the idea of ​​cleaning the room, walked up to Qiu Yan, took away his arm covering his face, and asked him: "Xiaotu, what's wrong with you?"

Qiu Yan's hair grew a little, almost covering his eyes, and his eyes, which were always melancholy, became more sad now.

I looked at the scattered cigarette butts under the sofa, and stomped hard, "Xiaotu, when did you start smoking?"

Qiu Yan opened his mouth, "It started on the day I broke up in love."

His voice was deep and hoarse, not a normal deep voice, obviously caused by a sudden injury to his throat from too much smoking.

Me: "Although the little rabbit is an adult, you still have to moderate your smoking and drinking."

Qiu Yan took my hand and looked at me blankly, but didn't say a word.

In any case, I will not condone his self-abandonment, and I will absolutely not allow a person as dazzling as him to degenerate.I held his hand almost like an order: "Get up, if you are sick, you should go back to bed and have a good rest."

Qiu Yan coughed twice, cleared his throat: "It's not sick, it's just that I'm too tired from rushing to draft."

I stretched out my hand to touch Qiuyan's forehead, "It's useless to lie to me. You have such a high fever, I won't pamper you anymore."

Regardless of Qiu Yan's surprise and refusal, I picked up the weak Qiu Yan and sent him back to the bed.Akihiko is much lighter than I imagined.

I fed him medicine, put a wet towel on his head, and moved a chair to the side of the bed. I sat on the side of the bed and watched him.

Qiu Yan: "I thought you wouldn't come to see me again."

Me: "Suddenly what stupid things did you say? Why do I want to see you? Does Xiaotu not want to see me?"

Qiu Yan: "Well. I don't want to see you like this again."

I panicked in my heart, is he really unwilling to see me again?But why?Why do you hate him?

Akihiko's cold hand pressed on my forehead.Gentle fingertips stroked vigorously between my frowning brows.

I panicked, "What are you doing?"

Qiu Yan: "I don't want to see Xiao Hao frowning again. Such a sad expression should not appear on Xiao Hao's face."

I suddenly breathed a sigh of relief, the man relaxed, and answered him with a chuckle, "There is no way, people will be entangled in many troubles and troubles unknowingly when they grow up. The frowning expression may be a reward for maturity." .”

Qiu Yan said: "Xiaohao looks very tired."

I hold Qiuyan's hand and press it against my forehead, the icy cold touch is on my forehead, it is soft but very comfortable.

Me: "Well, my parents left suddenly, and the responsibility of supporting the family fell on my shoulders. I'm fine, and I can support myself. Poor Misaki, who lost her parents at such a young age, besides me In addition, there is no partner to play with, he is very lonely."

Akihiko held my hand, "But Xiaohao also lost his parents. No matter what age, children who lose their parents are equally pitiful. Misaki still has Xiaohao to rely on, but Xiaohao has no one to rely on .”

My tears suddenly fell down.Uncontrollably rolling down one drop after another, the repressed grief and sadness accumulated in my heart seemed to find an outlet at that moment, pushing my tears and grievances in my heart to pour out uncontrollably one after another.In the end, I couldn't help crying.

I held Qiu Yan's hand and fell on the quilt and cried unscrupulously. Qiu Yan sat up and hugged me in his arms.I grasped his thin body as if grasping the only remaining source of warmth in this life.His palms were broad and powerful, stroking my back and stroking my hair. In the quiet room, there was only my suppressed crying.

Qiu Yan: "It's okay. I can be Xiaohao's support."

I fell into that tender embrace, and when I woke up again, it was already the next morning.

Qiu Yan stood in front of the bed with a refreshed face, "Xiaohao, are you awake?"

I sat up, still wearing the clothes I wore yesterday, "I'm so sorry. I was supposed to come over to take care of you, but you took care of me instead. I'm really bothering you."

Qiu Yan smiled lightly, "It's okay. As long as I can see you, my illness will be cured."

When I saw the bright sunlight outside the window, I realized that I spent the night at Akihiko's house, "Oops! Misaki..."

Qiu Yan said: "Don't worry. I used your phone to call Aunt Youcang yesterday and asked her to take care of Misaki."

Me: "Oh, that's it, thank you."

Seeing the revived Qiu Yan, my heart regained hope.Life is not as beautiful as imagined, because many annoying things will happen; but don't hate life because of this, because there are still beautiful things hidden in unexpected places, waiting to meet you.

I may be a selfish person, Akihiko and Misaki, neither of which I want to lose.In this way, the current relationship is just right.The two most important people in my life, I hope to be with them forever.I believe that Qiu Yan also has the same idea as me, so he chooses not to say anything, if he has not seen my admission letter.

Me: "Misaki, brother is going to the supermarket, what would Misaki want to eat?"

Misaki: "Pork soup."

Me: "Doesn't Misaki dislike it?"

Misaki: "But my brother has been making pork soup every day for the past few days, who is it for? Does my brother have other younger brothers besides me?"

Me: "Okay, Misaki, don't make trouble. He is my brother's friend. I took care of him because he was sick. He is a very good person, and he is my brother's most important friend. Misaki can't hate him."

When I came back from the supermarket with big and small bags, I was surprised to see Qiu Yan standing in front of my house with an anxious expression on his face.

Me: "Hey, Little Rabbit, why are you here so late? By the way, you haven't eaten yet, right? I'm also making pork soup today, so Little Rabbit stays and eats together!"

Qiu Yan ran over and suddenly hugged me.

Me: "Okay, let me go, little rabbit, let's go in and talk about something."

Qiu Yan hugged me, motionless.

I held something in my hand and didn't push him away, "Hey, hey, it will be troublesome if the neighbors around you see it. Let go, little rabbit."

Qiu Yan: "Why did Xiaohao change his choice? Didn't he want to be a lawyer like his uncle? Why did he get admitted to Mitsuhashi University's Faculty of Letters?"

My heart suddenly beat violently.

The school did inform me to pick up the notification letter before, but I didn't rush to pick it up because I gave up the university.I didn't expect to be seen by Qiu Yan.

Qiu Yan: "Is it because of me? Did Xiaohao do this for me?"

I smirked: "Oh, that's because the scores of the Law School of T University are too high, and I'm worried that I may not be able to pass the exam. I thought that if I can't inherit my father's will to be a lawyer, it's not bad to be a writer like Xiaotu .That's why..."

I didn't tell Qiu Yan the truth, which made me feel deeply guilty. However, after hearing Qiu Yan's words, this guilt swallowed me even deeper.

Qiu Yan: "But I got into T University Law School, idiot..."

What else can I say, what should I say, I don't want to say anything, I just want to let go of everything in my hand and hug him tightly.

The heavy food in the plastic bag fell on my fingers, and the pain and numbness spread to my entire arm and I lost consciousness.The stiff arms are overwhelmed and have forgotten how to hug.

Qiu Yan hugged me tightly with both hands, and sighed softly in my ear, "Xiaohao, I—"

"Little Rabbit is really amazing!"

I understood what he was going to say, but I couldn't let him say it. I just continued to smirk, "Sure enough, I hate you so much. Congratulations, Xiaotu. I am daunted by such a difficult thing as T.U. It’s so easy to do, it’s really enviable. What to do, I’m a little jealous of Xiaotu. But please continue to work hard when you go to university. I heard that there will be many new troubles in university. If Xiaotu If you also encounter troubles, you must talk to me, because I am a good friend of Xiaotu for life. This is something that will never change. Ha...haha..."

Just smirk, smirk to your heart's content, as if you are heartless, as if you are unconscious, as if you don't feel pain in your heart...

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