you are with the light

Gu Jinbei looked at Chen Ke with hurt eyes.

"Okay," he said, "Okay." He let go of his hand slowly, brought it to his side, and clenched it into a fist.

At this moment, Chen Ke didn't realize that his actions had hurt Gu Jinbei. He couldn't even take care of himself now. It was summer, but he was so cold that he seemed to have fallen into an ice cave.He felt out of breath, as if a hand was tightly strangling his neck, preventing him from breathing.

Chen Wanran died in an unseemly manner.

When he saw the corpse, he still couldn't believe it. His mother was such a beautiful person, who could smile and speak softly. How could she be cut to pieces like this, even if she was stitched up? Finally, the body is also full of ugly stitches.

When Chen Ke saw it, he couldn't hold back and vomited.

Yang Manguo told him that Chen Wanran was killed by vendetta.Chen Wanran was infected with AIDS, and she transmitted it to others without knowing it.She ran over to tell the man innocently, but was finally chopped to pieces by the man with a knife.

This is Chen Wanran, a naive fool who wants to return the most sincere feelings in this world even if he is mistreated.

What's the point?

If fate kisses him bitterly, then abandon fate.There is no need to bow to fate, because fate has always been bullying.

Chen Ke sat on the sofa, covered his eyes and started crying again.He shouldn't be so fragile, but he couldn't restrain the great sadness in his heart.He hasn't recovered yet, as if he has fallen into a nightmare, and he can't wake up no matter how hard he struggles.

Gu Jinbei stood beside him.

He still doesn't know anything about everything until now, and Chen Ke refuses to tell him, so he can only be anxious.He didn't like this feeling, he wanted to share it with Chen Ke, but Chen Ke was unwilling.

He sat next to Chen Ke.

Chen Ke was still wearing sandals on his feet, so Gu Jinbei bent down and untied the straps of the sandals for him.Chen Ke's feet are white, with several whiter marks on them.His instep is high, with a beautifully curved arch, and his toes are a lovely light pink.

Gu Jinbei held Chen Ke's ankle and took off his sandals.

Chen Ke seemed to have lost his five senses, even if Gu Jinbei took off his shoes, he didn't seem to feel it.He cried very deeply, he was completely immersed in his sad world and couldn't get out, while Gu Jinbei was outside his world.

Gu Jinbei put on slippers for him, and mopped the dirty floor.After doing all this, Chen Ke finally recovered. He stopped crying and just stared blankly at a point in the room, his eyes unfocused.

"Brother Chen." Xiaobei called him, his voice was very soft, "Brother Chen."

Like a robot, Chen Ke turned his head slowly and stiffly to look at Gu Jinbei.His eyes were big and bright, and they were filled with tears, some of which hung in their sockets and were about to fall.

Chen Ke generally would not show weakness easily, but at this moment he was really fragile like a piece of porcelain, as if he could be smashed to pieces on the ground with a light touch.

Gu Jinbei asked him again: "What's wrong?"

The tears hanging in Chen Ke's eyes fell down again, this time before Chen Ke raised his hand to wipe it away, Gu Jinbei wiped away his tears first.

Gu Jinbei's hands were hot, while Chen Ke's face was cold. Chen Ke's eyelashes trembled slightly and were covered with water droplets. Gu Jinbei suddenly wanted to kiss them.

He was taken aback by his terrible thought, and withdrew his hand as if being burned, but rubbed his fingertips in a place Chen Ke didn't pay attention to as if aftertaste.

Chen Ke cried for a while before he calmed down.

Gu Jinbei didn't dare to ask him what happened easily, so he could only sit by his side.After a while, Chen Ke said, "Go take a bath, it's getting late."

Gu Jinbei said, "Okay."

But no one moved.

Chen Ke looked at Gu Jinbei, and Gu Jinbei stood up: "I'll go first."

When he was walking towards the room, he kept looking at Chen Ke. Chen Ke lowered his head, the shadow of his hair fell on it, and Gu Jinbei couldn't see his expression clearly.

In the end what happened?

At night, Gu Jinbei rubbed the bed with Chen Ke with a face, but Chen Ke didn't chase him away.He was next to Chen Ke, hot sweat oozing from the place where their skin touched, but Chen Ke didn't say anything.

Chen Ke cried again.He was crying softly in the dark, his tiny sobs amplified in the small room.

This was the first time Gu Jinbei saw such a fragile Chen Ke.His heart seemed to be scratched by a cat, itching unbearably.

He tentatively stretched out his hand, and touched Chen Ke's hand in the dark: "You still have me."

Chen Ke's crying became slightly louder.

He cried for a long time before calling him in a hoarse voice: "Xiao Bei."

Gu Jinbei said, "I'm here."

Chen Ke called him again: "Xiao Bei."

"I'm here."

Chen Ke asked this question several times, and Gu Jinbei answered him very seriously.

"I am, I am, I am, I have always been."

Chen Ke turned over, the movement was not small.He hugged Gu Jinbei, buried his face in his neck, and hot tears fell on it: "Xiaobei..." He cried, "My mother is gone..."

Gu Jinbei froze all of a sudden.

His stiffness was not because of Chen Ke hugging him, but because of Chen Ke's words.

What's the meaning?

The night when Chen Wanran left didn't seem to be any different. Gu Jinbei would never have thought that that extremely ordinary night would be his forever farewell.There are too many accidents in life, and they will never guess what will happen next.

He reached out and hugged Chen Ke in his arms.At this moment, all those charming and unbearable thoughts in his mind disappeared, he just gently stroked Chen Ke's back, as if he was coaxing a child, although he was still four years younger than Chen Ke.

Chen Ke's whole body was shaking violently, he cried like a lost little animal, he lost his mother, lost his home, he had nothing.

Chen Ke cried for a long time before he stopped crying.He leaned on Gu Jinbei's body and heard Gu Jinbei say: "You still have me."

Chen Ke's tears that had just stopped poured out again.

He shouldn't be so fragile, Chen Ke is obviously not afraid of anything.Even if he encounters a huge difficulty, he can still grit his teeth and resist it.

However, people are afraid of warm hugs and gentle words. With these, no matter how strong a person is, he can't help crying.

Wait until dawn, another brand new day.Chen Ke has already packed up his mood to deal with Chen Wanran's funeral.He sent his mother to the crematorium and watched as his relatives were reduced to a heap of ashes in the crematorium.

He was still a little dazed when he got the box containing Chen Wanran's ashes. Chen Wanran was so light in his hand, like a feather, but as heavy as Mount Tai, pressing on his body.

He didn't cry this time, it seemed that he had dried up his tears last night, and now he couldn't shed anything.He walked home numbly, holding the box tightly in his hand, his fingertips turned white with force.

He put the ashes on his bedside table, as if Chen Wanran was sitting beside him.He closed his eyes, but saw Chen Wanran smiling at him.

He also laughed.

"Baby, be happy forever."

Gu Jinbei recently discovered that something was wrong with Chen Ke.

Chen Ke put Chen Wanran's ashes on his bedside table, talked to the box every day, and laughed when he spoke.

Gu Jinbei always felt that Chen Ke like this was scary.

The Chen Ke in his heart should have a face that is always indifferent, his eyes are as calm as water, but when he smiles, he is like a peach blossom.It's not like it is now, a little nervous, although it is smiling, it makes people feel uncomfortable.

Gu Jinbei was thinking about what he should do. At night, he lay on Chen Ke's bed with a sullen face, pulling Chen Ke to have a heart-to-heart talk.

"Auntie, where do you plan to bury?"

Chen Ke said: "Bury what? Isn't it good that she lives with us all the time?"

"It's good, it's just...you have to let her die in peace." Gu Jinbei said, "Put her by your side and make her miss you all the time, can you bear it?"

Chen Ke whispered, "I haven't."

Seeing that he was loose, Gu Jinbei took advantage of the victory to pursue: "Auntie always thought of you when she was alive, but now that she is gone, let her go away without any worries, okay?"

Chen Ke said with a trembling voice: "Isn't it good for her to stay by my side? Am I not a good son?"

Gu Jinbei said: "But as long as she lives, it won't be good for a day..."

Chen Ke didn't speak for a long time, then Gu Jinbei said again: "You can't come back to life after death, you have to look forward and move forward. And Auntie also has to move forward. If you let her go, you also let yourself go, okay? Let's find a good place for her and let her have a good sleep, okay?" His tone was very gentle, as if coaxing, which made Chen Ke shake.

Chen Ke suddenly said: "But I can't sleep." His voice was floating, "I can't sleep, I miss her."

Chen Ke is very attached to Chen Wanran.

From childhood to adulthood, Chen Wanran has never been absent from any of his moments, and she has slowly lived in Chen Ke's heart, becoming an irreplaceable existence.

Gu Jinbei couldn't understand Chen Ke's emotions.Although he is also attached to Xia Yin, but there is more fear in his heart. He is afraid of Xia Yin, afraid that he will become a lonely person after Xia Yin's death. Compared with Chen Ke's pure love, his love is mixed with many unspeakable things. man's secret.

"I may not be able to get out." Chen Ke said, he frowned in the dark, "I, I actually want to kill that person."

Countless times he felt his blood boil, wanting to rush over to grab that scum out of the prison, slash hundreds of thousands of knives, then chop it into minced meat, and feed it to his family one bite at a time.He also wanted to do something to that person's family, that person's parents, wife, and children.He knew the thought was scary, but he couldn't help himself sometimes.

He destroyed his light, and he dragged him to hell.

"This game is not fun at all." Gu Jinbei wrapped him in his arms, and Chen Ke did not resist, "My mother said, I hope I will never try it in my life."

"My mother won't lie to me, so you can take my word for it?" Gu Jinbei lowered his head and looked at Chen Ke's face under the moonlight, "Don't play the game of killing people."

The moonlight fell on Chen Ke's face, like a layer of silver veil fell on it, making Chen Ke seem hazy.

Gu Jinbei felt as if he was looking at him through a dream.

Chen Ke didn't answer him, but only slightly trembled his eyelashes, and the shadows under his eyelids moved.

Gu Jinbei waited patiently for a while before Chen Ke said, "Okay."

People in this small town believe in fate. If someone dies, they must ask a fortune teller to choose a place with good geomantic omen.Chen Ke didn't believe this before, but now he is willing to believe it for Chen Wanran.He listened to the recommendation of his colleagues, found a fortune teller who he thought was more sensible, and personally chose a cemetery for Chen Wanran.

Chen Wanran's hometown is in the countryside, and Chen Ke buried her in the green hills and green waters. It is quiet and peaceful, allowing Chen Wanran to sleep for a long time.

When Chen Wanran was buried, Chen Ke cried again.He watched his mother being buried in the loess, as if his own soul had been stripped and put in, and his whole body was in pain like a heart-piercing lung.

Gu Jinbei has been with him all the time.

After the funeral, the house was quiet for a while.Sometimes Chen Ke would sit in a daze while sitting, or shed tears at every turn. Gu Jinbei knew it would take time.It is difficult to forget a person, but it only takes time to wear it down bit by bit to be indifferent to a relationship.

Gu Jinbei thought, there is me, as long as I am here, Brother Chen will not collapse.

Because something bad happened at home, when the second model came down, Gu Jinbei's grades dropped a lot.

This matter is very serious and has attracted the attention of the head teacher.He first called Gu Jinbei to the office for a heart-to-heart talk, and then called Chen Ke.

When Gu Jinbei came back at night, Chen Ke was sitting in the living room waiting for him.Thinking of his poor grades, Gu Jinbei couldn't help lowering his head in shame. Chen Ke saw him and said, "Come here."

Gu Jinbei sat beside him.

"I'm sorry." Chen Ke said, "I affected you."

This made Gu Jinbei even more ashamed, and he said, "It's my fault."

"This is only temporary, and I will adjust myself soon." Gu Jinbei looked at Chen Ke firmly, "Believe in me, I will definitely not let you down."

Chen Ke smiled: "Okay."

Time is fast and slow, but still running forward at an unstoppable speed.In a blink of an eye, it was the college entrance examination, and Chen Ke waited outside for three days like other parents.Gu Jinbei looked very relaxed. When Chen Ke asked him how he was doing, he smiled and said that he played at a normal level.

On the day when the results came out, Chen Ke really understood what the so-called normal level is.No. [-] Middle School maintains the rhythm of launching a Tsinghua University and Peking University every year, and Gu Jinbei continues the honor of No. [-] Middle School.

On the day when he received the notice, Chen Ke was extremely excited. He rarely smiled when he was at work, and said a few more words to others. When others praised Gu Jinbei, it was as if they were praising him, making him elated.

Compared to the excitement of others, Gu Jinbei seemed much calmer.What he was more concerned about was the future. If he went to Beijing, would Chen Ke still be here?

After hesitating for a long time, he said to Chen Ke, "I want to transfer my account."

The admission notice stated that he could transfer his account, and he wanted to take this opportunity to break off the brotherhood with Chen Ke.

Chen Ke was stunned for a moment, feeling empty in his heart.He always has the illusion that the people around him keep disappearing and he can't grasp it no matter what. This feeling of emptiness makes him uncomfortable.

But he still said, "Okay."

Then, he heard Gu Jinbei ask him again: "Do you want to come with me?"

The author has something to say: I didn’t study hard and didn’t go to Peking University, so I don’t know what Peking University is like, so I used my own university as a template to write ≥﹏≤

[The last chapter has been modified, I want to read the original Weibo private message]