Mauritius

After revealing his secret, Clive kept his mouth shut.And he didn't like Risley and his mates, but he was stimulated.He was glad to know that there were people with his tendencies around him.Their outspokenness inspired him to tell his mother about his agnosticism.There's only so much he can honestly say.Mrs Durham, being a smooth woman, made no objection.Trouble arose at Christmas time, when the Durhams, the only gentry family in the parish, received communion separately from the rest of the village.She was irritated by Clive's absence as she knelt with her two daughters in the middle of the long podium in full view.Mother and son quarreled, and she was revealed for what she was—haggard, unsympathetic, and spiritually empty.He was disillusioned seeing his mother like this.At this moment, he found himself thinking strongly about Hall.

Hall, that was one of the few people he liked quite a lot.True, Hall also has a mother and two younger sisters.Yet Clive was too cool-headed to pretend that this was the only close bond between them.He must have had more affection for Hall than he realized—must have been a little in love with Hall.No sooner had they met, after the holidays, than a wave of passion seized him and brought him closer to Hall.

Hall was ill-bred, rough-haired, and muddle-headed -- the worst kind of person to have as a confidant.But Clive, grateful for Chapman's eviction, told him all about the family dispute.When Hall started teasing him, he was intoxicated.Others think he is sanctimonious and keep him at a respectful distance.In fact, he likes to let such a powerful and handsome boy wrestle and play.It was also a pleasure to be stroked by Hall's hair.The faces of the two of them staying in the room were blurred.Clive leaned back, cheek against Hall's flannel pants, and felt the heat of them pierce him.On these occasions he had no illusions, he knew what kind of pleasure he was getting, and he accepted it honestly.He was sure that neither side was harmed, that Hall was a man who only liked women—it was obvious at a glance.

Towards the end of the term, Clive noticed a peculiar, beautiful expression on Hall's face.This expression only emerges by accident, elusive, fleeting.He first noticed it when they were arguing about theological issues.It is affectionate, kind, and within the bounds of natural expression.However, he felt that there seemed to be a hint of arrogance in Hall's expression that he hadn't noticed before.He wasn't sure, but liked it.When the two of them met suddenly or after a long silence, Hall would have such an expression on his face.It overcame reason and seduced him: "Everything is fine, we know you're a smart man—come to me!" This look haunted Clive as he busied himself with his brains and roused his voice. tongue, looking forward to it.As soon as it appeared on Hall's face, he couldn't help but answer inwardly, "I'll go—I didn't know."

"You can't resist now, you have to come."

"I don't want to disobey."

"Come on, then."

Here comes Clive.He removed all barriers, not all at once.Because he didn't live in a home that could be destroyed.A full semester, followed by letters during the holidays, he paved the way.When he knew for sure that Hall loved him, he released his own love.Before that, it was just flirting, a momentary pleasure of body and spirit.How he despises it now.Love is harmonious and endless.He poured his personal dignity and generosity into it.In his peaceful soul they were one.Clive has no sense of inferiority, he is alone.When he realized that he was doomed to live a life without love for the rest of his life, he was not so much blaming himself.Rather, it is the environment.Hall, for all his good looks and attractiveness, did not look great in his presence.Next term they will meet on equal footing.

However, books were so important to him that he forgot that other people could be bewildered by them.Had he been more carnal, he would have incurred no misfortune.But he connected the love between the two of them to the ancient times, and at the same time to the present.Thus T. awakened in his friend the conventionality, and the fear of the law.He totally ignored this.Hall must have meant what he said, otherwise why would he say it?Hall loathed him, and said this: "Oh, don't talk nonsense!" It hurt him more than any invective, and it rang in his ears for days.Hall, a healthy, normal Englishman, was oblivious to Clive's preoccupations.

Clive was in great pain and humiliation, but worse was yet to come.As Clive has become so deeply integrated with the one he loves, he begins to loathe himself.His philosophy of life has completely collapsed, and the consciousness of sin, reborn from the ruins, crawls among the rubble.Hall once said it was a crime, and he knew the weight of that statement.Clive is ruined.He no longer dared to make friends with the young man, for fear of corrupting his morals.Didn't he make Hall lose his faith in Christianity and even try to tarnish him?

, Defiled his purity?

For three weeks Clive had undergone a great change.When Hall—the good, dull man—comes to his room to comfort him, he is detached.Hall tried all kinds of methods to no avail, and finally lost his temper and disappeared. "Oh, go to hell, that's the best place for you." It's so true, but it's hard to take it from the mouth of a loved one.Clive lost again and again.His life was shattered, and he felt he didn't have the courage to rebuild it and purge the evil.His conclusion: "Absurd boy! I never loved him. I just made this image in my polluted mind. Help me, God, to cast it out."

Yet it was this image that appeared to him in his sleep, causing him to call his name.

"Maurice..."

"Clive..."

"Hall!" He was out of breath, wide awake.A warm body temperature enveloped him. "Maurice, Maurice, Maurice... oh, Maurice..."

"I know."

"Maurice, I love you."

"I love you too."

The two of them kissed involuntarily.Then Maurice jumped out of the window just as he had come in, and disappeared.

"I've missed two classes already," Morris said.He was wearing pajamas and eating breakfast.

"It's all pinned up—it's just a punishment of being banned from going out."

"Would you like to go for a ride in the sidecar of your motorcycle?"

"Okay, let's go to the distance." Clive said while lighting a cigarette. "I can't stay in Cambridge in a weather like this. Let's get out of here and go for a swim. I'll work on it along the way. Why, what's the matter?" footsteps.Joey Featherstonhow put his head in and asked if either of them would play tennis with him that afternoon.Morris agreed.

"Why do you agree, Maurice, you fool?"

"To get him off as quickly as possible. Clive, meet me in the garage in 20 minutes. Pick up your dull books and borrow Joey's goggles. I need a change and some more lunch."

"How about we ride?"

"Too slow."

They met as prearranged.Joey's goggles were easy to get because he wasn't in the house.But as they drove along the Jesus Trail, the superintendent told them to stop.

"Hall, don't you have classes?"

"I overslept," cried Maurice, contemptuously.

"Hall! Hall! You have to stop when I'm talking to you."

Hall continued to drive. "It's no use arguing," he said.

"It's of no use at all."

Motorbikes flew across the bridge and up the road to Ely. Island". The existing cathedral was founded by Simeon, abbot of the Norman monastery.) road."We're going to hell now," said Maurice. The engine was powerful, and he was reckless.The motorcycle slammed into the swamp.The sky receded rapidly.They are reduced to a cloud of dust, a stench, and the noise of the world, but the air they breathe is clean, and all they hear is the merry howling of the wind.They don't care about anyone, they are detached.And if death befalls them, they will continue to chase the receding horizon.The dust towers of the sept, the towns—that was Ely—was left behind.It was the same sky ahead, but the color finally became lighter. "Turn right", turn again, then "Left", "Right", until completely disoriented. There was a "snap", and then a "crack", Maurice ignored it.There was a sound like a thousand stones being stirred between the two legs. There was no accident, but in a dark field, the motor suddenly stopped.The cloud of dust trailing long behind them began to settle at the sound of larks.