super english family crisis

Chapter 2 [Bitch] I heard that Deadpool is a super villain!

[Background: Three years after the Avengers collective fell, the identities of the Avengers members are no longer secrets, but outsiders do not know their identities. ]

[The so-called outsiders include the newly-emerged, cute new Deadpool who has just been on the road for Chaoying for a month, and has both righteous and evil styles. ]

[Note: In this article, Deadpool has cancer but is not disfigured. After gaining superpowers, he successfully killed the villains and is planning to become a superhero; Deadpool Wade still doesn’t know that Spider-Man is his lover Peter; Peter doesn’t know that the newly emerged snake The mentally ill Deadpool is the lover Wade. ]

"You can't do this!"

Peter desperately stopped the two crazy fathers, and kept saying: "Wade is just an ordinary person. He doesn't know anything. He doesn't know that my father is a superhero. He doesn't know that my uncles and aunts are superheroes." , I don’t know that I’m also a superhero...you will definitely scare him if you rush over like this.”

"So, son..."

Tony warned him earnestly: "This is called being inappropriate, let's break it up!"

"Your kind of thinking is old, and the new century doesn't pay attention to the right family." Steve refuted a sentence out of integrity.

"Peter, don't listen to Tony, it's been outdated for a long time. When looking for a boyfriend, character is the most important thing!" But at the next moment, he changed the subject and hit the point with extremely artistic language: "In the lover's old father The person who runs naked in front of me, I don't see any character in him, let's break up."

Tony said on the side: "Although what I said is slightly different, fortunately, we have reached the same conclusion."

Peter has a big head.

Although the two old fathers are sincere and firm.

But in fact, falling in love is always a matter between two people. They have always been well-behaved, but Peter, who has probably entered the belated rebellion period, always thinks that "Wade is a good person, he is just more free on a daily basis. If you don't wear colored glasses to see him , you can still find that he has excellent qualities'.

Tony responded with a sneer.

But Steve calmed down, thought for a few seconds, and out of trust in his son Peter, decided to make a compromise: "Maybe you're right."

"Papa Steve!" Peter was moved.

Tony yelled incomprehensibly, "Hey!"

At this time, Steve took the initiative to explain: "Tony, we can't sentence someone to death based on one side, we don't know much about that man named Wade..."

"How else do you know?" Tony continued to sneer: "We even know how long his dick is."

Steve choked visibly, and his face darkened when he recalled the embarrassing scene before.

But under Peter's pitiful gaze, he continued to explain with difficulty: "When looking at a person's character, you can't just look at J...JJ length. For example, when you and I were in love, before we knew you were Iron Man, I There have been many misunderstandings about you..."

"Okay!"

Tony clapped his hands hard, and said sarcastically: "It's time to settle the old score! Tell me quickly, what misunderstandings you have about me, I am very interested."

"Do you have to talk like that?" Steve said again, holding back his annoyance, "It's just provocative."

"You're right, challenge is one of my favorite sports." Tony replied.

Next...

Next comes the daily infighting time.

Tony is so annoyed by Steve's strict and serious approach to everything. If you hate it, you hate it. If you like it, you like it. Why do you have to talk about shit?

However, Steve felt that one should not act according to one's temper. Although his first impression of Wade was not good, he should give others a chance to prove himself!

Tony: Fucking chance!

Steve: Language!

"It's because you're always so unreasonable that Peter has a relationship without telling us!"

"Are you sure it's not because you're too old-fashioned, Captain?"

"It's okay to be conservative, Tony! It's weird to have sex when you first meet"

"Strange, I remember, when you slept with me, you didn't say that..."

"Tony! It was an accident, and besides, you promised me not to mention it."

"You also promised me that I would unlock a few more poses in the future, did you do that?"

Peter covered his face with his hands: "Stop! Stop talking, I don't want to know any details."

"I did. I did everything I promised you!"

"You mean that kind of textbook is as boring, old-fashioned, childish, like a child's play house..."

Peter broke down and shouted: "I said, I don't want to know!!!!!!!!!!"

The air is quiet.

Tony rubbed his temples wearily: "Let's separate for a while and calm down."

Steve looked confused: "You want to break up with me because of this!!"

"It's not a breakup, it's a separation for a while to calm down..."

"I can't hear the difference!"

"The difference is that when I'm sleeping on the bed, I don't have to see your serious face!"

"..."

After many years.

Peter complained to Natasha again: "It's all my fault, it's all my fault! Dads are getting divorced again! They almost broke up because of the parent meeting, but this time it's me again. Peter is a catastrophe, and Peter always brings crisis to this family."

Natasha felt distressed. How could the child be blamed for this kind of family crisis?

She sincerely told Peter in the video: "It's not your fault, my sweetheart! Sex life is uncoordinated, maybe you can endure it for a while, but you can't endure it forever."

(Tony & Steve: Not at all!)

On the other hand, letting lovers face their parents' accusations alone is not what a good man should do.

Wade considers himself a good man,

So, while Peter was trying to convince his parents, he was also acting...

For example, carrying a suitcase of US dollars to a bar where mercenaries often go to issue tasks.

The name of the mission is—Hello, father-in-law!

This task was born out of the routine of "hero saving the beauty".

He hired two teams of experienced mercenaries, each with 11 people, who together could play a game of football (crossed out) to besiege Peter's fathers.

At the critical moment, Wade Wilson, the great Deadpool will descend from the sky to save the two father-in-laws...

In his plan, when he saves the two father-in-laws, he can also take off Deadpool's red hood, reveal his superhero identity, use superheroes to gain extra points, and put on a sad man like Captain America. The dignified expression of worrying about the country and the people will surely instantly raise the favorability value of the two father-in-laws to the highest!

At that time, the two father-in-laws will definitely shake his hand emotionally: "You are actually a superhero, Wade! God, that's great! Thank you, thanks to you, we can be safe You are the best superhero, and Peter will be taken care of by you from now on."

However, the reality is cruel!

"Why can people who do logistics sweep away thousands of troops these days?"

Deadpool stood at the entrance of the alley with two knives in his hands, his little heart beating thumpingly.

He was horrified to see one of Peter's fathers maiming most of the mercenaries with three punches and two kicks. Shaking and lying limp on the ground like suffering from Parkinson's.

Then, the two of them turned their heads keenly at the same time, and looked at the red figure holding two knives at the entrance of the alley with serious expressions.

Deadpool sneered and waved like a beckoning cat: "Send...deliver food, pass by, pass by..."

On the other side, Tony and Steve, who are Iron Man and Captain America, reluctantly reconcile in the face of the 'crisis'.

As superheroes, they subconsciously believe that this attack is definitely not simple, and that the new Deadpool who claims to be 'passing by' may be the culprit.

Actually besieging Iron Man and Captain America's hidden identities Tony and Steve!

No matter how I think about it, I feel that there is a conspiracy (Deadpool: No...).

"A new supervillain?" Steve asked.

"It looks right." Tony replied seriously.

Deadpool, who has just become a superhero for less than a month, is planning to discuss with Spider-Man, his good neighbor in New York, about "how to be a superhero" and "how to be loved and welcomed by people". The reason for this is that the leaders of Avengers Iron Man and Captain America have classified them into the group of super villains...

Wade was stunned when he heard the unfortunate news:

Why!Why!How could I be a super villain?I helped the old lady cross the road yesterday!