[SK] I don’t have to love you

On the day Krist confessed his love to him, the night sky in Bangkok was not always dark, but a quiet dark blue that seemed to draw people into it. The picture was so beautiful that it was unreal, like a dream.

Singto thought that there would never be such a bright moonlight again.

But on the day Krist broke up with him, Moonlight was also fine.

If only it rained, he thought then.

But life is not a studio, no one will specially create a rain for him.He has long been used to the failure of heaven to fulfill one's wishes.

It's just that he still didn't expect that this scene, which had been predicted many times, would still make him feel uncomfortable and almost lost his composure at this moment.

Yes, from the very beginning, Singto felt that the relationship between them could not last long.Maybe it's not that he doesn't believe in the relationship between them, but that he doesn't believe that the word "forever" has anything to do with him.

Krist is a very dazzling person, no matter where he goes, people can't ignore it. What matches this temperament is of course his ability to make friends.

I remember that when Krist first joined the crew, he quickly got along with everyone. No matter when you look at him, you can see his clean and lovely smile.

Of course, Singto will not show any coldness.

In fact, at that time, he had been working hard to maintain the communication that a normal person should have. Although he was exhausted physically and mentally, he always thought that he was faking it well, until he accidentally heard Toptap chatting with Krist privately that day: "You and Krist Singto won't really have any chemistry, will he? It feels like the scene in the afternoon was really full of pink bubbles."

"What pink bubbles! Don't talk nonsense, my brother is good at acting!" Krist immediately retorted.

Probably because he was afraid that the words just now were not convincing enough, he paused, and then continued: "I am straight, and, don't you really think? In fact, when P'Singto is alone, there seems to be something around him. It’s like an enchantment, and it’s chilly within a few meters.”

"Is there?" Toptap recalled suspiciously, "I think it's quite a gregarious person."

Krist sucked on the extra pink frozen milk, and shook her head helplessly: "You absolutely didn't see through his essence, nor did you believe in my essence, I'm such a straight man!"

A few words about him were brought over, and Singto even understood that it was just a few casual chats, not even talking about people behind his back, and Toptap might not take those few words seriously at all. But he still felt at that moment that all his previous concealment seemed meaningless.

For a long time after that, he didn't know how to get along with Krist in private.

Fortunately, Krist always talked a lot, even if it was just the two of them left, the scene would not cool down.

It's just that every time he talked and laughed with him, Singto couldn't help but think in his heart that he actually knew that I was not good at these things and knew my disguise, so he couldn't help but feel embarrassed.

So, after Krist confessed his love, after he experienced the initial ecstasy, when he calmed down, he couldn't help guessing, maybe, did he deliberately come here to make fun of me after losing the big adventure with those friends?

If this is the case, then his performance is really terrible, and he doesn't know how long he will be laughed at by them.

However, after all, it is only his thoughts that are dark, and it is true that Krist said that he likes him.

Singto has never been able to understand how Krist, who easily sees through him, fell in love with him, but during the two years with Krist, his heart seemed to have been taken care of by the warm wind of the cool season, and he could taste happiness from time to time. taste.

It's just that he still feels that one day, these happiness will be taken back.

Singto thinks this way, not because he doesn't believe in Krist's love for him.

Krist is a very pure person, kind and simple, open and aboveboard.

Although he wouldn't talk about his love for Singto because of face, but he couldn't hide it with his gestures.He is not like Singto, he is not a person who can hide. He was even accidentally caught by the camera several times during various activities. The intimate movements and expressions that should not be in front of people, those who appear in the corners of the screen , has also become a long-lasting giant sugar in CP Chaohua, and from time to time there will be summary posts to be worshipped.

It's just that Singto always feels that this love will not last long.

At the age of 21, he started to be an actor, and gradually learned how to be surrounded by mountains and seas, as if he understood how to perfectly digest the increasingly raging love.

But what those people love is the Singto he played.

For so long, only Krist has seen what kind of himself is hidden under his skin, and only Krist's love has always made him tremble.

In fact, when we were not together, he never dared to have the expectation of being connected with Krist, but people are always greedy. Once he has it, the desire will gradually swallow up the original peace in his heart.

will be more afraid of losing.

And loss will come eventually.

He forgot in which interview he said that he enjoyed the quiet time alone, but it was not like that. What he liked the most was Krist's dependence on him during those two years, as if he wanted to spend the free time between the two of them. Calculated to every minute and every second.

But at that moment, he was most afraid of Krist's insinuating questions.I was also afraid that these happiness would go too fast, so I never deliberately controlled my desires, and raced against time to entangle with Krist, which made him complain very much.

But only in such an intense moment can Singto forget everything else and feel that he really has the person in his arms.

Because it's exhausting to pretend to be around someone who can see right through you.

He didn't know how to clumsily perform in front of Krist for the rest of his life.

If one day, that gloomy, selfish and inferior man finally shows up in front of Krist, that love will surely become riddled with holes.

Instead of fleeing in embarrassment at that time, it is better to separate from him decently while it is still early.

So when Krist finally broke up with him, at that moment, Singto couldn't tell whether he fell into the abyss or was finally relieved.

Or maybe it was the breath of relief at the bottom of the abyss.

However, just like the ecstasy after being confessed for the first time, the relief after separation is also fleeting. Seeing that he could only be on the cold screen or in the bustling crowd, he realized that he was not as open-minded as he imagined for the expected separation.

He's not the same guy he never was with Krist.

Once people have tasted the taste of being close to each other, it is difficult to bear loneliness.

Just like being unable to hide the original love, in the few months after the breakup, even if there was a chance to meet, Krist still had obvious alienation and rejection of him, but because of the screen image of the two, they couldn't do it. It was too blatant, and Singto could only take comfort in his little compromise.

He also knew that Krist was not someone who would compromise for a long time, so when he heard Krist say those words that night, he was not too surprised, but he was a little out of breath at that moment, and there was only one thought in his mind.

In the future, even in front of people, I will never find a chance to get closer to him.

He originally thought that with such a decent separation, at least he could continue to be friends with Krist.

But Krist didn't even think about being friends with him.

The moment he felt the car hit him, he actually felt a sense of relief.

It's just that he didn't expect that moment to be not the end for him.

Singto didn't know how he came to such a mysterious world, but ever since he discovered that he could control everything here with his will, he was completely immersed in it.

He knew that this Krist was fake, that this senior Arthit was just like everyone else, but it was just his imagination.

But the world called "One Year" is really too attractive to him.

Kongpohp is an existence different from him, that sunny and persistent boy, a person who is worthy of happiness.Thousands of people feel that he is good enough to be worthy of Senior Arthit and live happily ever after.

Then if he is Kongpohp in this world, he will definitely be happier for a longer time.

But maybe the inferiority complex in his heart is too strong after all. In this fictional world, Senior Arthit is the only one who is not under his control.

He wanted him to stay by his side so humblely, but Senior Arthit still disappeared.

Maybe in his subconscious mind, Krist will not love him after all, even in the fantasy world, it is impossible to stay with him.

In the year he met Krist, he had just lost the closest person in the world.

It was a very difficult time of guilt.

At that time, when he was still young, he only cared about escaping selfishly, immersed in self-righteous decadence and gloom, and when the closest person left, he didn't even stay by his side.

He prayed quietly afterwards, if you can forgive me, come and see me in a dream.

Backstage at orientation rehearsals, he'd seen the man sitting in the crowd backstage during those walking-dead days.

The man was smiling brightly and chatting with the people around him. From time to time, he would raise the drumstick and beat the drum beats loudly.

At that time, he seemed to be shining.

From then on, until a long time later, Krist was the most dazzling person in his eyes.

In the past, he begged many times, but after all, his mother never came to his dream.

Now, he begged many times, that fake senior Arthit still failed to stay by his side.

Singto finally remembered that that year, when he stood on the stage as the coach and senior, Krist looked at him with disdain even in the crowd.

It was he who signed up for the first-year casting for the sake of a little social interaction.

It was him who had been forcing.