die like the dodo

Pei Zian was very drunk, when he saw Lu Boyuan, he thought he was dreaming.

He might miss Lu Boyuan too much.

Lu Boyuan stretched out his arms to hug him, Pei Zian's whole body went limp, his breath smelled of heat and wine, he threw himself into Lu Boyuan's ear, and asked foolishly, "What are you doing here?"

Lu Boyuan touched his face, it was too hot, he said: "Let's go home."

Pei Zian shook his head, and a moving mist rose in his eyes: "You can't come, I will be reluctant to come if you come, and want to stay." At the end he added angrily: "I will It's really not firm, what can I do..."

Pei Zian's legs were so weak that they started to slip after walking a few steps. Lu Boyuan simply let his head rest on his shoulder, hooked his legs and hugged him horizontally, then turned his head and asked Xiaoyue how they planned to go back. .

Xiaoyue's eyes widened, obviously she hadn't turned the corner from the fact that the teacher's wife is actually a handsome uncle, or the female colleague who didn't drink too much said that she called a car to take them, so Lu Boyuan took Pei Zian left.

Pei Zian sat down obediently in the passenger seat, turned his head sideways and kept looking at Lu Boyuan. He was obviously drunk, but his eyes sparkled brightly. Lu Boyuan had discovered that Pei Zian would become childish when he was drunk. At this moment, he He grabbed the rope hanging from Lu Boyuan's hoodie and twisted it between his fingers.

Lu Boyuan was driving, without squinting, he reprimanded him indifferently: "Stop making trouble, let go."

Pei Zian immediately stopped moving, and said aggrievedly: "Don't let go, I've caught them all, don't let go..." Lu Boyuan saw that he was about to cry, so he stopped bothering him and let him hold on. It's just that I couldn't help complaining, how could I know not to let go of a broken rope, but I couldn't do it to him?

When Pei Zian said he wanted to leave, Lu Boyuan deserved to be straightforward, because he had hurt Pei Zian's heart before, and he didn't have the confidence to keep him.But the postcard sent from Duolun made Lu Boyuan know that Pei Zian loved him, but some reasons he didn't know hindered each other, and brought them back to the situation five years ago.

Pei Zian gradually fell asleep in the passenger seat, but his fingers were still tightly hooked to the rope, unwilling to let go at all.At the red light, Lu Boyuan looked at Pei Zian quietly, and pinched his hot earlobe.He thought, this time he won't make the same mistake again, there are so many five years in his life, he doesn't want to regret it again.

Lu Boyuan rummaged through his body but couldn't find Pei Zian's key. After thinking about where it might have been lost, he took him back to his home.Pei Zian was very obedient all the way, but he didn't expect to suddenly feel dizzy when he entered the door, and his stomach was overwhelmed and he wanted to vomit.Before he could tell Lu Boyuan in time, he waved him away and ran towards the toilet, but Pei Zian forgot that he was drunk, and his sense of direction also failed. It wasn't the toilet door that opened, but the room that Lu Boyuan was hiding. Willing to let him see the room.

The room was full of pottery, and the display method was clearly the same as Pei Zian's previous ceramic studio.But Pei Zian didn't realize this, he just grabbed a jar in his hand in a panic, and vomited sullenly.

He spat out tears from the corners of his eyes, his body reeked of alcohol and he was in a terrible mess, but his consciousness gradually became clear, and many wild thoughts arose.

Lu Boyuan slid down his back and asked him if he was feeling better. Pei Zian felt the heat flow from the butterfly bone to the end of the spine along with the palm of his skin, like an inexplicable gust of wind at dusk , bringing some fragrance of flowers and heat, plucking at his heartstrings.

Lu Boyuan poured him a glass of water and asked him to rinse his mouth. Pei Zian opened his eyes and looked around the furnishings in the room. He felt that maybe he was not sober, otherwise how could he see the studio five years ago? It's too familiar, he remembers that he and Lu Boyuan made a failed black pottery together in the workshop, and he smashed it later, he still remembers their countless kisses, hugs and sex, Lu Boyuan likes to hold him up, watching Pei Zi'an screamed in surprise and climbed on him with both legs.

Pei Zian asked Lu Boyuan, am I dreaming, or have I gone back to the past...

Lu Boyuan lightly touched Pei Zian's reddened eye ends with his fingertips, and said, "You have cried too many times."

Pei Zian thought that Lu Boyuan was complaining that he still pretended to break up with him, so he lowered his eyes in panic and apologized: "I'm sorry, I drank too much, I didn't mean to..."

But before he finished speaking, Lu Boyuan interrupted him and asked, "Are you sober?"

Pei Zian nodded, not knowing what Lu Boyuan wanted to do, but he heard the rapid beating sound in his chest.

Lu Boyuan stood up and stretched out his hand towards him. Pei Zian held him subconsciously. He thought that Lu Boyuan would let go soon, but he didn't. He kept holding Pei Zian's hand and approached the clay pot on the shelf.

It was a clay pot with a very strange shape. It was built with a simple method of mud strips. The mud strips were uneven in thickness and had some fingerprints on them.Pei Zian knew at a glance that this was a novice's work, the technique was clumsy, but the shape was not bad, very similar to some of his previous works.

He noticed that the label on the bottom of the jar had a date written on it, a certain day four years ago.Pei Zian looked at Lu Boyuan, wondering what the jar meant, but Lu Boyuan didn't answer his doubts, but just led him to move forward.

Every piece of pottery has a date, for four years without interruption, and the skills of the maker have become more and more mature, gradually breaking away from the traces of imitation, and have their own style.

At the end of the showcase, Pei Zian saw a black pottery that had not been successfully fired. Not only that, it was even put together again after being broken. There were obvious signs of repair between the red and black pottery pieces.

Pei Zian stretched out his fingers to touch those mottled marks, his throat felt tight with anger, he wanted to ask Lu Boyuan why you made so many pottery sculptures.

But in the middle of the story, he couldn't continue. Four years, probably after Lu Boyuan's accident, he touched the clay and the wheel, and tried to touch Pei Zian's old dream. What did he want to do?Is it due to regret and longing, so you want to replace the other party to complete the previous dream?

It turned out that they had the same idea.

Lu Boyuan said to him: "I'm sorry, I yelled at you last time, but I was actually afraid that you would know that I was also a coward trapped in the past..."

"It's not your fault." Pei Zian's tears fell uncontrollably, and he shook his head: "It's my fault. You were injured to save Tang Lizi. I hurt you."

At this moment, Lu Boyuan finally knew the reason why Pei Zian wanted to leave. He felt a sense of helplessness that could not be laughed at. He was not only angry at Pei Zian's self-talk about leaving, but also soft-hearted at the fact that the other party cherished him so much. Those who love each other are unable to let go of their inferiority complex and guilt.He looked at him softly, and wiped away Pei Zi'an's endless tears: "When I knew there was no way to continue the archaeology, I was sorry, but I didn't regret it. After I left you five years ago, I told myself that in the future I will never regret anything related to Pei Zian."

"So, would you like to stay?"

Pei Zian felt that there would be no better person than Lu Boyuan in this world. Lu Boyuan's eyes were bright, and he dragged Pei Zian who had sunk to the bottom of the lake to the shore. He still couldn't let go, but Lu Boyuan needed him, so he was willing to stay. Next, spend your whole life to repay it.

Lu Boyuan thought it would take a long time, he would fill up the crack in Pei Zian's heart, as long as he was willing to stay.

They kissed affectionately under the gaze of the clay pots on all sides. They experienced all kinds of scars, but when they kissed, they seemed to go back to five years ago.

Lu Boyuan stroked Pei Zian's back with his palm, and felt the trembling skin under his palm close to each other, as if two balls of clay were kneading together and gradually blending into one.

……

……

……

Pei Zian felt like a bumpy boat, full of pleasure like a storm, but it seemed that only in this way could the overflowing emotions in his heart find an outlet.

"I love you so much, Lu Boyuan." Pei Zian inserted his fingers into Lu Boyuan's messy hair, his consciousness was melted, and he was cast into a robot that can only speak love language. Loving Lu Boyuan is the only instruction.

Lu Boyuan kissed the tears on his eyelashes and the tiny mole on his neck, pecking and kissing little by little, as if the most precious treasure in the world was no more precious than the person in his arms.

He is not used to talking about love, but at this moment Lu Boyuan had the urge to tell, he said to Pei Zian: "Do you know what your body looks like?"

"Like the wind in spring, the rain in summer, the clouds in autumn, and the sun in winter, it is beautiful and warm."

Pei Zian's ears were red, and his toes were curled up. He felt that Lu Boyuan was exaggerating, obviously he was the one who made people feel like they were bathed in the spring breeze and in the morning sun.

He thought, Lu Boyuan's eyes are filled with the romance of the four seasons, otherwise why would he have been moved since the first meeting.