Spring Summer Autumn Winter

Xu Linshuang has a lot of books, and he has to tidy them up before each holiday. Some magazines and novels are directly given to these roommates to read and play, and most of the other books are sold as waste paper.

A few days before the summer vacation, he started sorting out his books again, and put a thick stack on Yang Siyuan's desk.

So as soon as Yang Siyuan came back, he saw that he didn't even have a place to put his dinner.

"My God, why do you give me so much? I haven't seen the one you threw at me last semester. Why don't you just sell it and make some money?"

"This is food for thought, my friend. I specially left these good-looking ones for you. Both of them are horror novels." Xu Linshuang said.

You just don't want to move the books down the sixth floor.Yang Siyuan thought to himself.

But he also knew that Xu Linshuang had good intentions, so he didn't say anything else, and moved the book to the empty space under the desk after thanking him.

Perhaps because he was bored, he picked up the top magazine and opened it to read casually.

I don't know if it's because he hasn't read the article for a while to relax, but he read such a youth growth magazine with great interest, and he kept reading it until the other three people went out to play at night.

Maybe I'm exhausted from the exam week... But these articles are really good.Yang Siyuan read halfway, then turned back to the cover to look at the name of the magazine.

"Sprouting", the name is not bad, it looks like it is about adolescent girls, but I seem to have passed puberty, why do I still read it so enthusiastically.

Maybe make up for what is lacking... Yang Siyuan chuckled lightly and turned back.

The location of the page seems to be wrong, not the article he just read, but a column.He reads magazines one by one in a regular manner, so he wants to turn to the half of what he sees. At the moment when he is about to turn the page, his eyes are fixed on a certain corner of the column. .

There is the author's signature in the lower right corner of the article.

Li Yuan.

This is an extremely common name, thousands of people in this world may take this name, but Yang Siyuan's eyes still cannot be separated from those two words.

Just looking at these two words, he felt a pain in his heart.

Maybe I'm a madman, it's really ridiculous to see people with the same name and surname like this.

Where are you?It would be great if this was really you... His fingers lightly caressed the name, and he assumed that this was the Li Yuan in his memory.

If it's really you...

and many more?

Yang Siyuan stopped his movements suddenly, and then carefully looked at the two characters, following the direction of the strokes with his eyes, tracing the two characters in the air with his fingers.He suddenly became short of breath, as if he had discovered something incredible.

Li Yuan.

Li Yu'an's Li, Yang Siyuan's Yuan.

Li Yu'an has written these two characters, and Yang Siyuan has learned both.Li Yu'an's handwriting has an obvious style, and he has never seen anyone who writes similarly to him.He is so familiar with it that even after several years, he can still be sure that this is his handwriting.

is it you?Is that you?

He still didn't react. He was afraid that he would be happy for nothing, so he hurried to read this column article - "To You Who I Must Miss".

This style of stating everything indifferently, the plain but straight-to-the-heart language, the sentence sentences he likes to use, the parallelism he is good at, the self-loathing inadvertently revealed in his articles, and the description of the image of "you"...

Yang Siyuan knew this "you" because that was him a few years ago.

Really you... why are you writing this article, which is clearly the confession of a humble crush...

Recalling the strong wind, howling and rolling up the fragments he hid in the corner, rushing towards him one after another, not allowing him to dodge.

In the flying sky, there is a glass of cherry blossoms, an old song, a lantern riddle, a bunch of fireworks, and a piece of paper to say goodbye...

The brain seemed to flash back like a revolving lantern, crying and laughing seemed to be in the previous life, Yang Siyuan stroked the name, and was about to cry silently.

……

He didn't sleep well all night, so he went to the bookstore the next day and bought all the "Inception" that he could buy, and then carefully read the articles written by Li Yu'an one by one, but unfortunately, the other articles had nothing to do with him .

There was only one article, expressing his love for Yang Siyuan with a tone of heart like ashes.

It was so sudden that Yang Siyuan felt like he was in a dream, he wanted to wake up but was afraid of waking up.

Does Li Yuan really like me?

He thought about what Xu Linshuang said before, but still felt a little untrue.

Could it be... that I really went crazy. In fact, this article was not written by him, and the protagonist in the article is also someone else?

The world is so big, this possibility is not impossible.

Yang Siyuan's mind was in a mess, and he didn't have much energy for a few days, until the day he returned home.

But after returning home, he couldn't help thinking about these messes.

Chen Limei is often not at home. After a few days of restlessness, he shuts himself in the room to draw, and plays the guitar for a while when he is tired of painting, but he only plays the song "Arrival".

After a holiday, he didn't go out a few times, and the paintings in the house were piled up again, but this time he didn't have to worry about being ripped off.

Before school started, Chen Limei brought that man home, and wanted the three of them to have a meal together.

Yang Siyuan didn't mind at all. To be honest, he admired Chen Limei quite a bit. He could fall in love again after more than a year of divorce, and maybe he would remarry soon.

The man brought a lot of gifts, most of them were for Yang Siyuan, Yang Siyuan silently put the gifts aside, and then helped Chen Limei serve the dishes.

"Uncle Liu, yours." Yang Siyuan pushed the bowl and chopsticks in front of the man and said calmly.

The man did not expect that the child would not resist him at all, he was stunned for a while, and then laughed.

"What are you laughing at?" Chen Limei also laughed while being led by him.

"Xiao Yuan is really sensible." The man said.

sensible?Don't count, I just think it's none of my business, so let you go.Yang Siyuan thought to himself.

"That's right, it doesn't matter who taught it." Chen Limei said, and picked a piece of meat for Yang Siyuan.

The man was about to answer, but he heard Yang Siyuan say: "Uncle Liu, don't give away these things anymore, I don't need so many, let's talk..."

Both Chen Limei and the man were a little nervous and listened to him holding their breath.

"Besides...we'll all be one family in the future, so it seems strange." Yang Siyuan said without any disturbance in his heart.

Both of them were taken aback when they heard this, and then they realized the meaning of Yang Siyuan's words, and they were overwhelmed with joy, and randomly picked up vegetables for him.

The three had a lively meal and sent the man back after ten o'clock in the evening.

Yang Siyuan went back and took a shower, then lay down on the bed and listened to music.

"Xiao Yuan, are you asleep?" Chen Limei knocked on the door and asked.

Sure enough, it will be different after falling in love, and now they are knocking on the door.

Yang Siyuan took off his earphones and said, "No."

Chen Limei opened the door and came in, sat on the edge of the bed with a gentle expression, but Yang Siyuan felt a little distant.

"Mom is so happy that you can really accept him..." She leaned forward and took Yang Siyuan's hand.

Yang Siyuan sat up and said: "I've always accepted it, I can't let you live the rest of your life alone. You don't need to tell me about this matter, as long as you think it's appropriate."

Chen Limei sniffed, her eyes sparkling.She nodded and asked: "You will be a junior soon, study hard, but don't be too tired, go out with your friends more, or fall in love... Hey, what kind of friends did you make in college?" Yet?"

Yang Siyuan: "I have a very good relationship with a roommate, and we are very good friends."

"How are you? Is there nothing wrong with you?" Chen Limei asked.

Yang Siyuan smiled: "Of course not, he is very nice, otherwise I wouldn't be friends with him."

Chen Limei nodded: "That's good, you must pay attention to making friends, don't make friends with those who are not honest like before..."

This made people feel uncomfortable, Yang Siyuan frowned, and asked, "Isn't it right? Who are you talking about Qin Ziliang and the others?"

Chen Limei quickly shook her head, patted his hand and said, "No, Xiaoqin is fine. Just the tutor when you were in high school, Li Yu'an. Don't make friends like him in the future..."

As soon as she said "Li Yu'an", Yang Siyuan's heart suddenly started beating crazily, and the calmness just now disappeared without a trace.

He withdrew his hand, unconsciously raised his voice and asked, "What's wrong with him? What's wrong with him?"

He couldn't feel his tone, but from Chen Limei's point of view, it was clearly questioning.

Seeing that he suddenly became anxious, Chen Limei blurted out: "That kid is gay!"

As soon as the words fell into his ears, they rushed to Yang Siyuan's brain along the auditory nerve, and then turned into a bomb that exploded, completely blowing away his sobriety and rationality.

"You, what did you say? How did you know?" Yang Siyuan clenched his hands tightly, trying not to clamp Chen Limei's shoulders.

Chen Limei seemed to be having a hard time speaking, and he hesitated to speak clearly.

"What's going on?!" Yang Siyuan was dying of anxiety, his eyes were bloodshot, and he stared at Chen Limei.

"Oh! When I asked him to come to our house to celebrate the New Year, the two of you were lying on this bed. You fell asleep at the time, and then...then he..."

"What happened to him?!" Yang Siyuan was about to shout.

"He...he wants to kiss you!"

As if struck by a thunderbolt from the blue sky, Yang Siyuan seemed to hear a "buzz", the heart that had been beating wildly just now was suddenly dead silent, and the respiratory system was completely out of action. His whole body was frozen like this, every inch of his body was like a dead body Generally cold.

……

Li Yu'an admired Brother Ling very much, because the day after Brother Ling urged him to find a salary increase at the magazine, he was actually told to increase the manuscript fee.

He didn't feel anything about being "famous". Firstly, he thought his character was like this. Secondly, Brother Ling was exaggerating. Objectively speaking, there are indeed many people who got to know each other through this article. He, but far from reaching the point of conflagration.

But anyway, it's a good thing that it will make him a little more money.

In order to make his level worthy of the manuscript fee, he also began to delve into writing, and often bought some good books to study.He used to read it in the bookstore where he worked, but now he has to find another place.

It didn't take long for him to find a good place.

There is an underground bookstore in the train station, and most of the books sold there are second-hand books, and the prices are much cheaper.And what surprised him was that there was actually a reading room in there, which was like a library where you could sit and read a book, and you didn't have to buy it after reading it.

Li Yu'an became one of the many loyal customers in this reading room. When he encountered a favorite and useful book, he would buy it back and keep it. After more than two months, several stacks have been piled up in the room.

Correspondingly, his writing level is also constantly improving.He was already very smart, and often he could draw inferences from one instance after a little instruction, not to mention studying so hard now.

It's just that it's really tiring, and it's a day and night every day.

The book city is below, and the sun cannot be seen, and the bar transferred him back to the night shift, but there is still no sun.

Every time he gets tired from studying, he will silently think of what he once said to himself - as long as he can become excellent, he can be close to Yang Siyuan.

Relying on such a sentence, he survived many days without sunshine.

It doesn't matter, the three words "Yang Siyuan" are the brightest light in itself, even the sun can't compare.

But he never expected that he really saw this beam of light so far away from him.

One day at the end of August, Li Yu'an went to the bookstore for a day as usual, and didn't come out until dinner time. He bought a burrito in the plaza and was ready to go to work in the bar.

It was already dark, the train station square was lit up, and the shadows on the ground passed each other.

Li Yu'an had to go through the train station and go to another exit to take a shortcut. He bought a bottle of water, drank a couple of sips, and then walked forward.

Ahead was the station entrance, and he had to go around on one side.

A man just got out of the station, walked in a bit of a hurry, knocked off his water, picked it up and gave it to him quickly.

The man apologized to him, and he took the water and said it was okay, then turned around and continued walking.

However, the moment that person walked away from him, before he could turn around, his eyes naturally swept forward, and suddenly saw a figure.

It was just a glance, he didn't actually see what that person looked like, but his heart seemed to react and suddenly missed a beat.

He subconsciously looked for that person again, and quickly locked his profile in the crowd.

The man was tall, with a guitar on his back, and was quietly following the crowd.

They were not close, but the outline of that person seemed to be very clear, so clear that Li Yuan could see every eyelash clearly.

He was too familiar with this profile.

He thought about the date, and then realized that today was probably the day they started school.

This is Yang Siyuan, and now he is leaving.

He is leaving.

This idea popped up suddenly, disturbing Li Yu'an and panicking immediately.

The person he likes, the person he is waiting for, the person he thinks about day and night...his Yang Siyuan, his light - is leaving.

This time I left, I don’t know when such a coincidence will allow him to see him next time, maybe I won’t be able to see him in this lifetime...

The long longing made him abandon everything that could be discarded. His concerns and dignity at the beginning, as well as his cautiousness in not daring to disturb Yang Siyuan, all seemed so ridiculous, pitiful, and unworthy of mentioning in front of this beam of light.

People always lose their minds at some moments, such as the moment when they are about to miss each other.

Li Yu'an squeezed the water bottle tightly, stood still and struggled for a while, then suddenly ran towards the crowd.

He kept looking at Yang Siyuan, watching him walk in step by step, he was about to enter the station...

"Borrowed, borrowed..."

There were too many people, and it was difficult for him to squeeze in, let alone move forward.

Yang Si was getting farther and farther away from him, and he was about to go in soon!

Li Yu'an suddenly panicked like a child, and was so anxious that he was about to shed tears. In the panic, he was dominated by instinct, and suddenly shouted: "Yang Siyuan!"

He shouted loudly, and some people around looked over, but the person in his eyes did not.

He was about to cry.

"Yang Siyuan! Yang Siyuan!" He kept shouting like a different person.

But no one responded.

"Yang Siyuan! Don't, you...Yang Si...yuan..."

He was so anxious that he couldn't speak coherently, and finally he was squeezed out. When he wanted to go further, he saw that Yang Siyuan had already entered the station.

Probably won't leave yet... I have to go through the security check!

He ran to the glass wall on the other side and lay down on it looking for Yang Siyuan.

found it!

He smashed the glass frantically and shouted his name hoarsely, but he didn't know that he couldn't hear anything on the other side of the glass wall.

He saw clearly that Yang Siyuan was wearing earphones and sat in the waiting area with his back to him.

"Yang Siyuan... don't..." His voice was full of tears, and his tears dripped onto the glass and flowed down slowly.

He was tired and almost hopeless.

Several security guards came over and dragged him out. He sat on the ground like a lunatic who lost his mind, weeping expressionlessly.

Yang Siyuan in the waiting area felt that there was some commotion outside, so he looked back and saw nothing.