clear road dust

City L is located in the hinterland of the northwest. It is a small and medium-sized city with a dry climate all year round, with many mountains and hills and dense vegetation.Because of its sparse population, simple folk customs, and quiet natural environment, it has attracted more and more tourists to explore in recent years.

Zhang Yang is a junior this year, a music student.People who study music are full of romantic cells. Every holiday, he takes his guitar to the surrounding cities to play.Sometimes playing and singing a song on the street attracts crowds to watch, and it is also very enjoyable.

The scenery of L city is beautiful, and the city is not big. He has already stayed here for one night. He went shopping around the first day, and today he found a small square to "sing".After adjusting the equipment and opening the voice, many citizens stopped.

After two or three pieces of music were sung, some people occasionally put money in the piano case for him, but he didn't care, and just took the water next to him to drink.While drinking, he glanced calmly at the opposite corner.

There was a person sitting in the corner, and Zhang Yang had paid attention to him when he first came here.It was a very young man, with a slender figure, wearing slightly old clothes, with long hair, covering half of his face, and his exposed lips were bloodless.The man sat there quietly. It was obviously a very hidden corner, but there seemed to be some peculiar aura that always attracted Zhang Yang's eyes.

Near noon, there were not many people in the small square.Zhang Yang put away his guitar and walked towards that person.

"Here, I invite you to have a drink." Zhang Yang handed a glass of grapes and fresh lemons to the man, and greeted him with a smile.

The man seemed taken aback, and quickly sat up straight.After a while, he hesitated to take the drink in Zhang Yang's hand, and said thank you softly.

Zhang Yang Da Lala sat next to the man, looking sideways at him sipping something.The hair swept over the straw, and he flicked it, pinching the excessively long hair behind the ears, revealing the entire profile of his face.

Zhang Yang couldn't help but click his tongue.

I thought to myself how did that sentence say?Like a dusty pearl, even if it covers the dazzling light, it can still make people feel the clarity and dustiness inside.

The man in front of him perfectly interpreted the essence of this sentence.

"Little brother, let's get acquainted! My name is Zhang Yang, and I'm a student of the Provincial Conservatory of Music." Zhang Yang introduced himself, and looked at the young man next to him at close range. He was too thin and looked a little malnourished.Clothes are a bit out of place, a bit too big, but overall clean.A face was only the size of a palm, too small for an adult man, more like the face of a sixteen or seventeen-year-old boy. Although his complexion was pale, his facial features were rare and clean, without any impurities.

It doesn't look like a homeless person, but it is definitely not a person living in a normal environment.

It looks... like a troubled little prince who escaped from the castle and is trapped in the world.

"What's your name?"

"Did you run away from home?"

"Are you hungry, may I treat you to dinner?"

The man seemed bewildered by Zhang Yang's long list of questions, staring blankly at him not knowing what to say.

Zhang Yang smiled: "You have listened to me singing all morning, you are my loyal audience, I would like to invite my loyal audience to accompany me to lunch." He stood up, pushed the piano case towards the man, He said "look at me" and ran away.

After a while, Zhang Yang ran back with a big bag of hamburgers and Coke.

The two chatted while eating.They said they were chatting, but Zhang Yang was actually talking, and that person responded occasionally.

From Zhang Yang's itinerary to music, and then to the scenery of L City, the sunny and talkative boy laughed heartily from time to time.Gradually, the man seemed to be infected with Zhang Yang's happiness, and his face became lively.

Zhang Yang originally thought that he would not wait for this person to say his name. After all, people in this situation would inevitably keep their identity secret.

But that person still introduced himself politely. When Zhang Yang heard the person whisper his name, he couldn't help asking in doubt, "Which three words are they?"

"Your Ruo Qing Lu Chen, Lu Qing Chen."

"Cao Zhi's bright moon rises to a tall building." Zhang Yang was stunned, and recited the following verses, "The king is like clearing the dust of the road, and the concubine is like muddy cement. Ups and downs have different potentials, when will they meet? Wishing the southwest wind, let the long death enter the king's arms ..."

Zhang Yang didn't know if it was his own illusion. When he recited the last sentence, the person next to him obviously froze for a moment.

"You should be older than me, so I'll call you Brother Xiaolu!" Zhang Yang said.

However, after hearing this address, Lu Qingchen looked up at Zhang Yang, his eyes were a little red, but a smile slowly appeared on his face: "You are very like a brother I know, he also likes to call you that I."

After the two had eaten and talked for a while, Zhang Yang took out his guitar and prepared to sing.Seeing Lu Qingchen staring at the guitar, he thought about it and asked, "Can you play?"

Lu Qingchen nodded hesitantly: "I played it when I was young."

Hearing what he said, Zhang Yang immediately broke into a smile, and he stuffed the guitar into the opponent's arms: "Then you come!"

Lu Qingchen was frightened by his actions for a moment, his mouth was slightly opened, his eyes were round, and he wanted to push the guitar back with a face of resistance.

"I invite you to eat and drink, you have to sing a song, right?" Zhang Yang "threatened" with a smile.

The sun is lazy in the afternoon, with the unique idleness of a small town. There are not many people in the small square, and most of them are old people playing and walking with toddler children.

Lu Qingchen tried the sound, and hummed lightly.

ThisismyDecember

Thisismysnowcoveredhome

ThisismyDecember

Thisismalone

And I give it all away just to have somewhere to goto

Give it all away

To have someone

To come home to

……

Lu Qingchen learned the guitar from his grandfather when he was a child. Grandpa is a music teacher, and he has all kinds of musical instruments at his fingertips. Lu Qingchen only loves the guitar, and has even adapted many songs to play and sing.Many people praise him as a painting genius, but few people know that he is also quite talented in music.Since his grandfather and parents passed away one after another, he never touched the guitar again.

His singing voice was much lower than the original clear voice, low and mellow, hoarse and sad, as if he could sing into the soul of a person.After singing a song, he looked up and saw Zhang Yang staring at him blankly, and murmured, "It's over, my bones hurt."

"Compared to you, these youth pain songs I sang are simply street goods. You are the one who sang the sadness to the core." Zhang Yang stared at Lu Qingchen thoughtfully, thinking that this is really a man with a story. classmate.

"What are your plans for the future? You can't keep wandering!"

"If you have any difficulties, I can help you find a way."

"You can sing so well, you can go back to school with me, my uncle opened a bar nearby, you can go to sing, life has to go on, doesn't it?"

Is life going on?

Lu Qingchen didn't know.But when he stood on the rocky beach on the first night when he left home, and never had the courage to jump off, life had already continued.He was not afraid of death, but he was afraid of the bottomless loneliness in the cold seabed, so he stood there for an hour and then turned and left.

He wanted to find a sunny and warm place to end.

——But I found that every place I walked was not warm and sunny enough.

At the beginning, he was dazed and not sober. He only remembered climbing a mountain and walking along a quiet suburban road for a long time until he walked out of the urban area of ​​Pingzhou.Later, he walked northwest along an abandoned railway, passing through many villages, towns, and small cities, and met many good and bad people.He is afraid of crowds, but at the same time he is also afraid of being alone, feeling contradictory and wrong.

During the day he would choose to stay in remote places, but at night he must rest in a place with lights and people.Sometimes when he is lucky, he will stay at the home of a kind farmer and help them do what he can, but most of the time he sits in places like banks, Internet cafes or snack streets that are brightly lit all night.

He once helped some students of the Academy of Fine Arts draw sketches on the street, earned a little money, bought some simple food, and also went to some small fruit and vegetable markets to help carry, so as to get some food.

But hunger is always the norm.

Hunger made him gradually malnourished, but strangely, the thought of ending his life gradually receded.

He will go to the hospital, public toilets or some service institutions to wash up, where hot water is more convenient.After saving a little money on hand, I would go to a small hotel that costs tens of dollars a night without registration of identity information, take a good bath, wash clothes and sleep.

He walked all the way, met many people, and saw many things he had never imagined—if he hadn't left, this would never have appeared in his original life trajectory.

Every morning at 4 o'clock in the morning, the old couple who set up the breakfast stall handed him a bowl of steaming wontons in the cold morning; the little girl playing on the lawn in the park handed him a large bottle of fresh oranges and oranges Lollipops with the same taste; on the bench in the hospital lobby, a young man who came to see a doctor from afar but had no money to be hospitalized, handed him a worn but thick military coat...

Of course, there were many villains, but he couldn't remember them all.

He only remembers those people who passed by and the warmth they gave him, even though it was only a little bit, even insignificant in the eyes of others, it was enough to burn his body and soul, giving him the courage to go on.

As for where to go, he hadn't thought about it.

You can always find a place that is warm enough and safe, he thought.At that time, if he no longer wanted to end, maybe he would stop and find his home in December, which was covered by ice and snow, but belonged to him forever.

From the beginning, he completely shielded himself from the world, and gradually saw the beauty of the world.

However, it is still difficult to peel off the thick cocoon that traps oneself.

"Thank you, I should go." The person holding the guitar raised his face, and gently refused to the kind-hearted person opposite.He picked up his cloth bag on the steps—that was his only possession at the moment.It was given to him by an elder sister who distributed leaflets two days ago. Thanks to him for helping to distribute the remaining leaflets at another intersection, the elder sister was able to pick up her son before school. There were two apples in the bag.

After walking not far, Lu Qingchen heard the sound of running behind him. Before he could turn around, he neatly grabbed the bag strap behind his shoulder with one hand.

Zhang Yang grabbed a handful of money, some small change, and stuffed it into his backpack—the small change should have been taken out of the piano case, and the whole red note was obviously Zhang Yang's own.

"This is your reward for singing just now, safe journey." After Zhang Yang finished speaking, he ran away for a long time, afraid that Lu Qingchen would refuse.

Lu Qingchen's eyes were slightly red, and he waved goodbye to the other party.

Then, taking advantage of the daylight, he turned and left.

Zhang Yang looked at the thin figure who was getting further and further away, and suddenly that sentence popped into his mind:

Every random person you meet on the street is someone other people dream of meeting.

Lu Qingchen got lost in the mountains.

The city of L is mountainous, and it was the time when Xia Qiu was handing over. His eyes were full of greenery. He walked around the mountain roads in the suburbs for a day but he didn't understand. He could clearly see the white walls and red tiles in the valley in the distance when he was standing halfway up the mountain. Can't get down.

The twilight is all around, and the mottled tree shadows are like monsters, hiding in the dark night waiting for an opportunity to bite people. If you can't go down the mountain again, you can only spend the night on the mountain tonight.

A person who is not afraid of death is actually afraid of the dark and ghosts.

Silence and darkness are like a viscous liquid, wrapping him airtight, unavoidable, and making people lose their way.He was sleepy and hungry, and his mood was startled, so he simply ran around on the mountain road, trying to find a bright exit.

It may be more unlucky, but there will always be a little luck.During the random collision, he accidentally found a little orange light on the mountainside dotted in the dense forest in the distance. Without thinking about it, he ran towards that light.

It is a two-story building surrounded by red brick walls, a typical northern building, simple and plain.The gates are two closed black iron gates, and there is a sign next to it: Qizhi Special Education School.There are two street lamps on the side of the road, and the light comes from here, dotted in the silent night, for those who have just experienced the wind and rain, it is terribly gentle.

Sitting on the steps under the street lamp, Lu Qingchen felt a sense of security that his heart was down to earth - he had been wandering for four seasons, and he liked to stop at the gate of the school for the night. There were not only lights, but also the hidden hustle and bustle. The sense of belonging gives people an illusion of stability in this world.