After the apprenticeship, I became a hater

I really thought that Luo Wuchen loved me.

If he didn't love me, how could he be willing to marry me.

But I forgot about him, betrayed his affection, and even wanted to regret the marriage at the beginning, it was too...

I felt ashamed in my heart, so I became more obedient, and I did what I was asked to do, without daring to have any objections.

The things in front of me were hazy and fuzzy, and amidst the noise, I heard the sound of water dripping, which was the uncontrollable tears falling from my eyes.

After worshiping heaven and earth, the grand ceremony has come to an end.

The congratulatory voices came one after another, surging up from all directions like a tide.

However, I was still unable to blend in. Obviously I was another protagonist, but I felt as if I was cut off from the outside.

The huge sense of dissociation and uneasiness made me subconsciously lean towards Luo Wuchen, the only person present who was a little familiar.

Luo Wuchen noticed my tears, and his eyes were fixed, "Still crying?"

His face was a little cold.

I think it's because my untimely tears ruined the happy atmosphere of the big day.

"Maybe it's because the wind is too strong." I hurriedly raised my sleeves to wipe my tears, and carefully explained to my nominal husband.

It's really strange, obviously I'm married to the person I like the most, but how can I...

Why are you still crying?

Shouldn't I be happy?

Could it be... this is weeping with joy?

There was a dull pain in the secret depths of the heart that was hard to ignore.

It is similar to the powerlessness and despair of watching the horses and horses lose control and go all the way to a dead end.

it's wired.

How can there be such a strange feeling inexplicably?

My mind was in a mess, I thought a lot, but I didn't make any progress.

All the news about myself comes from other people's mouths. I don't know the lies that are just compiled to trick me into obedience, but I believe it.

Obviously he only lost his memory, but he seemed to have lost his brain as well. He didn't know how to be stupid, and he was also blind.

In the end...not only was he deceived, but his heart was also deceived.

Unfortunately, at that time, I was as blind as I was, unable to see everything that was wrong.

In other words, I saw it, but I didn't see it as if I was blind.

The joy of playing gongs and drums, the congratulations from the guests, all kinds of voices mixed together, it was so lively that I wanted to escape.

The tears that were so hard to hold back finally fell down.

I don't know where I got so many tears, they kept falling like rain.

Confused and at a loss, I quickly raised my sleeves to cover my face.

"It's raining." Someone in the crowd said that.

As soon as this remark came out, someone responded immediately, "It has been raining for a while, which is annoying."

The sky suddenly darkened, and it was too cloudy to tell the time.

And almost the next moment when the sky was dark, there were well-trained maids shuttling through the hall to light candles.

In an instant, the hall was brightly lit with candles.

I'm really weak, and I've only stood there for a while, and I'm already a little tired.

The vision of the eyes to see things has become blurred, probably because of too many tears.

Fortunately, no one bothers me about the embarrassing incident of crying and crying on my big day. Occasionally, the eyes that fall on me will only stay for a short time, and they will quickly move away as if they are not interested.

I followed Luo Wuchen like an invisible person, and it wasn't too difficult.

only……

My heart felt a little sour pain for some reason.

Luo Wuchen lowered his eyes, stared at me silently for a moment, and suddenly hugged me up.

I guess I was stunned from crying, and my reaction was much slower. It took me a long time to let out a low cry after being picked up, "Ah!"

"Hold me tight." Luo Wuchen ordered.

I felt that everyone's eyes were on me, my body was so stiff that I didn't know what to do, my head went blank for a moment, and I was stunned for a moment.

Hearing Luo Wuchen's words, I put my arms around Luo Wuchen's neck to keep my balance.

Luo Wuchen hugged me and brought me back to the room.

Being placed on a bed covered with bright red brocade, I also felt in my heart that it should be like this.

After worshiping heaven and earth, it should be the bridal chamber.

Bridal chamber...

As soon as my thoughts rose, I couldn't help but feel hot on my face.

Is it too fast?

But... we are all married, and he is already my rightful husband...

Well, that does seem to be the case.

I frowned in embarrassment, clutching the fabric under my hands tangledly.

Luo Wuchen pinched my chin, forced me to raise my head, and wiped away the tears on my face with his thumb.

"So aggrieved?"

Aggrieved?

I was confused and at a loss, staring blankly at Luo Wuchen for a long time, and asked with determination: "Will you treat me well?"

Luo Wuchen caressed the corners of my moist eyes, "Be good, I will love you."

The moisture in my eyes has not faded, I grabbed Luo Wuchen's palm nervously, and begged softly: "I will be good, you love me."

"Call me what?"

"Husband... Jun?" I hesitated for a moment and called him softly.

Luo Wuchen seemed to smile, his eyes were dyed with a warm color by the candlelight.

"My husband loves you."

Luo Wuchen smiled lightly, stroked my hot cheeks with his fingers, and got up as if to leave.

I grabbed his sleeve anxiously, my fingers were trembling.

Facing Shang Luo Wuchen's suspicious eyes, I stammered and asked, "No, don't you want a bridal chamber?"

Luo Wuchen caressed the top of my hair like a pet, "Wait until you recover from your injury."

So this is ah.

I'm the most easy to coax, Luo Wuchen said that, I didn't have any doubts at all, instead I was very moved, I only believed that he was considerate of me and took pity on me.

"Yeah!" I nodded vigorously.

I'd better be impressed, whoever gives me a point, I can't wait to return it a thousand times and a hundred times.

Luo Wuchen really treated me very well, he found healing herbs for me, and took good care of my body.

I was already moved when I first saw him, and he treated me so well, my heart fell on him unconsciously.

But I forgot that most of the injuries on my body came from him.

And because he never got real kindness, he regarded Luo Wuchen's kindness as a treasure, and was moved foolishly, and gave away everything he had bit by bit.

I really have no brains, I only want to remember Luo Wuchen's kindness to me, even if he makes me sad and wronged, I only find reasons from myself.

After getting married, Luo Wuchen seems to be very busy, I may not be able to see him every day.

Killing Peak is too big, but there are no people there.

Apart from me and Luo Wuchen, there seemed to be no one else.

I am a little lonely.

I have no past, and the memory of the past seems to have never existed, and there is no trace of it.

The only one who is closely connected with my past is Luo Wuchen, and I rely on Luo Wuchen more and more.

But he has always been reticent and doesn't like to talk.

Although I know that he is my husband, I am also afraid of his cold face, and dare not pester him too much and ask him questions.

The doubts in my heart rolled out, and I was kicked back to the corner.

Sometimes, when Luo Wuchen has free time, he will accompany me to read and write, and will also teach me about formations and talismans.

It's a pity that this kind of time is always very short, more often I stay in Killing Peak alone.

I counted 170 stones in the yard twice, and I turned over the books left behind.

I was really bored, so I wanted to go down the mountain for a walk, just to relax.

But Luo Wuchen always forbids me to leave Killing Peak, and whenever I ask him the reason, he will have a cold face, "No need to ask."

Seeing his cold face, I didn't dare to ask any more questions. Although I was at a loss and felt wronged, I just endured it myself. After a while, I went to look for Luo Wuchen again as if nothing had happened.

It's just, just... I still don't understand, I'm not a bird in a cage that will escape when the cage door is opened.

Why does Luo Wuchen refuse to let me leave Killing Peak?

It was Qin Qing who came to prescribe me the medicine, and when he found out, he teased, "You and your husband are newly married and not sticking together, what are you doing running down the mountain all the time?"

I mumbled, "I'm not..." I didn't always want to run down the mountain.

"Besides, your injuries are still not healed." Qin Qing glanced at me, "Jian Zun also cares about you."

Yes……

so...

right.

I pursed my lips at a loss, yes, I still have injuries on my body, I really should rest and not run around.

"When you recover from your injury, I will go with you wherever you want to play." Luo Wuchen said.

When Luo Wuchen said this, I felt that I was making trouble for no reason, and I was so ashamed that I couldn't bear it.

"Hmm..." I replied in a muffled voice, "I see."

After that, I didn't mention the matter of going down the mountain any more, I only wanted to heal my wounds with peace of mind.

But, sometimes, there is always an unreasonable uneasiness in my heart, which rises suddenly and fades suddenly.

I was so flustered by the torment, I couldn't help but seek comfort from my husband, begging him, "Husband, kiss me."

"You hug me."

My husband will pick me up and kiss me on the forehead with pity.

"Not afraid."

I buried my face in his arms, very attached.

Your husband is so kind.

I don't know if it was because I was injured too badly, or for some other reason, but it has been nearly a month since I fully recovered from my injury.

Luo Wuchen said that he would have a bridal chamber with me when I recovered from my injury.

I was a little scared at first, but slowly I started looking forward to it.

When a person likes another person, it is impossible to control the urge to be close to him.

It is instinctive to want to be close to the person you like.

I want to be closer to my husband.

I want to be a real couple with him.

One day, I noticed that the scars on my body were almost gone, so I mustered up the courage to go to Luo Wuchen.

Luo Wuchen stared at me, "Wan Wan, what's wrong?"

My face was also red, and my voice was as light and viscous as melted sugar, "Husband, is it time for us to have a bridal chamber?"

Luo Wuchen was slightly taken aback, as if he didn't expect that I would take the initiative to talk to him about this.

I became more and more ashamed, my cheeks were hot, and I was trembling like a frightened rabbit.

When I was placed on the bed, I trembled even more.

"afraid?"

I squeezed his fingers and shook my head lightly, "I'm not afraid."

Because it is you, I am not afraid.

Luo Wuchen hugged me tenderly.

I feel loved.

Only, once in a while, I have weird dreams.

In the dream, I fell into darkness, struggling in the mire and abyss.

Every time I woke up, I was covered in cold sweat.

I didn't know how to relieve my inner anxiety, so I became more sticky and clean.

Luo Wuchen seemed to be aware of my depression, and took me down the mountain to play and relax.

Sometimes it’s closer, sometimes it’s farther away. My husband took me to the southern Taoyuan to enjoy the peach blossoms ten miles away, swim across the rippling lake that can’t be seen at a glance, and taste all kinds of sweet, sour, and strange spiritual fruits.

Together with Luo Wuchen in the heavy snow in the north, they grow old together.

Occasionally, we double repair.

Being comfortable is comfortable, but after being comfortable, there is always a emptiness, as if something is missing somewhere, and it is filled with a sense of loneliness and loss.

I touched my lower abdomen, feeling empty in my heart as if something was missing.

what is it then?

I can't figure it out.

After returning to Zetianzong, Luo Wuchen no longer restrained me. Except for the forbidden area, I can go wherever I want in Zetianzong, and I am free.

Time passed day by day like this, and I didn't realize that half a year had passed since Luo Wuchen and I got married.

Although I still can't recall the past now, I'm not as hesitant as I was back then. I was heartless and happy as Luo Wuchen's little wife, and I only wanted to be with my husband for a long time.

One day, I was sitting on a big tree looking at the scenery, suddenly a few disciples of Zetianzong came, chatting and laughing, chasing each other.

I don't know if it was a coincidence or not, but the person they were talking about happened to be me.

One said, "I really don't know why Jian Zun married that Xie Wan."

"I want you to talk more," the other pushed him jokingly, "We can't talk about the sword master's matter. But at least Xie Wan's skin is nothing to say."

"It's just a beauty in a vase," the disciple said disapprovingly, "Do you know the word "beautiful face and withered bones?"

It turns out... my fingers were clenched suddenly. In the eyes of the disciples of the Zetian Sect, I was just an idiot who got married to Luo Wuchen after a great fortune.

In fact, not only do they look down on me, but I also look down on myself.

It is obvious that I am Luo Wuchen's wife, and Luo Wuchen's rightful Taoist companion.

But when I was belittled like this, I was so cowardly that I didn't even have the courage to stand up and say a word for myself.

Really useless.

"What's more, he is still a man, so he might as well marry Fairy Bi Yao, although his cultivation level is not high," the disciple who spoke showed a frivolous smile, "but at least he can give birth to one or two for Master Jian..."

So they laughed.