love is hard to choose

Sunny Tuesday, March 2000, 12

He went out early in the morning, he said that I don't have to go to work today, I know he is avoiding me, just so I can get to know him more when I have time.

I found the old mother at home, she watched Han Qi grow up, she doesn't always make things difficult for me like other people, she is always so kind to people, just like my grandma, I can't help but want to get close to her.

I heard from her that Han Qi had a partner who grew up together, and the relationship between the two was very good, but I don't know why the boy broke off with him a year ago.The boy in the old mother's mouth should be the boy in the photo. He and Han Qi should be lovers. It turns out that I am just a substitute for that boy.

I know, it must be very sad for my lover to leave Han Qi. I suddenly wanted to cook something for him. I asked my old mother to teach me how to cook. I know every dish that Han Qi likes, so I cooked a table of dishes with confidence. Waiting for Han Qi to come back, but unexpectedly, he only took a sip when he came back, and threw the chopsticks on the table in a rage, "Who made this, throw it all out for me, and redo it." Then he went up angrily. upstairs.

I was taken aback, the old mother hesitated to speak, and finally just shook her head and turned back to the kitchen to cook again.My tears flowed down, I know that those servants laughed at me behind my back, for those I have long been used to, it is such a painful thing to be denied by the people I like.

........

Han Qi saw this angry slap himself, what did he do, his Chen Bing is so beautiful, why did he never pay attention to him, he regretted so much.

Thursday, August 2004, 5 was sunny

Today is May [-]st, the company is on holiday, and my colleagues all said they want to go out to play. They urged me to persuade Han Qi to go together, but I had no choice but to bite the bullet and talk to him. I didn’t expect him to agree. We played until late, everyone Some of the colleagues were drunk, only Han Qi sat coldly and watched us play wildly. Maybe it was because of alcohol, but a colleague actually called Han Qi brother by virtue of alcohol. Han Qi frowned with distaste Mei pushed the colleague away, I was anxious when I saw it, and wanted to pull him away, but the colleague seemed to be delirious and continued to ask desperately, "Big manager, why don't you find a girlfriend and just stay so stiff all day long?" Don't pay attention to anyone with your face, are you not good at that?" As soon as I said this, before I could stop it, Han Qi punched the man in the face, and the man fell to the ground, and everyone couldn't stand it because of this. Woke up with a punch, everyone didn't dare to breathe out, and the colleague was too scared to get up, Han Qi gasped and left angrily, I chased him and he drove away.

I rejected my colleague's proposal to take me home, and walked back alone. When I got home, Han Qi hadn't come back. I lay in bed and couldn't sleep. Seeing Han Qi coming back downstairs with a woman, he seemed to be drunk. When he saw me, he only said to me, "Go to sleep in the next room." He went upstairs with his arms around the woman, passed me into the room.

My heart suddenly became cold, I didn't go to the next door, I went downstairs and lay on the sofa all night, how could I sleep.I have been with him for almost five years, and we have never had an intimate act. Now he would rather hug a strange woman, yes, if he doesn’t love me, how could he have desires for a man older than him.Should I give up on a relationship without love.I have been waiting for him to open his heart for me, but his heart is not on me, I know what he likes and dislikes, but these are useless, because he never wanted to come to understand me.

........

When Han Qi turned to this page, there were tears on the paper, and the words were blurred, and his heart ached.

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