african diary

Xiao Hang has already mentioned the matter of resignation to Manager Yang, and the resignation email has also been sent to the headquarters. He can leave the company after returning to China next month and completing the salary and formalities.Since he signed a three-year contract at that time, now Xiao Hang has to terminate the contract one year in advance, and the company deducted his bonus of 3 yuan. Congress is better.Just like what he always felt, the outside world is as wonderful as the world in the book, but there will always be a day when he returns to reality, what he has to do now is to return to reality, and then slowly heal his wounds.Men don't live for feelings. Didn't Daniel feel relieved?

I kept hiding the matter of leaving from Ted. First, I really didn’t know how to say it. Second, the ERP project that Ted is currently talking about is as important as a milestone for him. After this project is completed, his The company will no longer be a small business like a studio, but a real first step towards a grand blueprint.

In the evening of this day, Xiao Hang came to Daniel's clinic to say goodbye to him.The two went out for a light meal together, drinking beer and chatting on the terrace of the clinic.

"Daniel, to be honest, you and Ted are getting better, right?" Looking at the beautiful stars in the sky, Xiao Hang suddenly said this.

"How did you find out?" Daniel smiled: "Actually, it doesn't count, we don't call it love."

"Lovers can't tolerate a little sand, and they are often very sensitive to this kind of thing."

"So? Are you going to settle old scores with him, or are you going to break off relations with me?"

"How can it be? It's all in the past." After more than a year of getting along, Xiao Hang has established a deep friendship with Daniel.In fact, he didn't mean anything else by asking this question, but suddenly felt that he and Ted still had a lot of things they didn't understand.

"Ted never asks me about my past, and I don't ask him about his past, do you think that's okay?"

"You also said that it's all in the past. Is there any need to mention it?"

"But it's impossible for a person to live without the past. He doesn't know my growth environment and experience, so he can't understand my thoughts. Even if the two of us love each other to death, what's the point?"

Daniel frowned: "Have you encountered any problems?"

"It's not between us, it's actually my personal problem."

Daniel pondered for a moment, then slowly said: "After Raymond disappeared, I suddenly realized that the two people who love each other, in the face of life and death, any problem is not a problem, but unfortunately everything is too late."

Although Daniel didn't talk about the matter with Raymond in detail, Xiao Hang also saw that the two were in love.

"Not necessarily, he just disappeared."

"Don't comfort me, the news around the world has not reported a few cases of being missing for several months and still appearing alive, especially the place he went to..." Daniel couldn't continue, this may become the engraved A lifetime of pain in his heart.

"If Raymond showed up again, would you be with him?"

"Yes, and never let go." Daniel said firmly.

It’s great. Westerners are always so careless when they do things. Their thinking is two points and one line. What to do will never beat around the bush. But Chinese people are different. Chinese people’s thinking is a mess. Factors to consider Too much, even I can't figure it out, let alone others.

Xiao Hang took a big sip of wine, what Daniel said just now really strengthened his determination, but his choice was different from Daniel's.Yes, in the face of life and death, any problem is not a problem, but this life and death is placed in front of his parents, not in front of Ted.Recently, he sometimes mocks himself and thinks that his father's early departure may not be a bad thing. In his father's heart, he will always be the handsome, good-looking son with good academic performance. Immediately pissed off.As for the mother, she is now her only spiritual support. Whether he is selfish or cowardly, everyone should live well, even if he lives like a walking dead all his life, at least he is still alive.As for Ted, his departure may cause him a lot of pain, and he may not be able to get out for a long time like Daniel, but at least he is still alive.It's nice that everyone can breathe under the same sky.

Sure enough, Ted successfully won the ERP project.When he rushed back from the UK, Xiao Hang had almost handed over his work in Kenya and was about to leave for his country.Ted was a little strange about the company's arrangement for Xiao Hang to return to China in the middle of the year, but there was nothing he could do. Part-time workers must obey the boss's arrangement, right?The night before his departure, Xiao Hang lay quietly in Ted's arms for the whole night, and every second of Ted's appearance from waking up to falling asleep was deeply engraved in his heart.He originally thought that on the last night, he and Ted should be lingering to death, just like in the novel, so that the sky would be dark and the feeling of blending with each other would be remembered for decades to come, but at that time, he only felt a little He has no strength at all, just watching his lover quietly consumes all his energy.

The next day, when Xiao Hang was sent to the airport, there were not many people at the security check entrance. There were five or six people ahead and it was Xiao Hang's turn. Looking at his lover's haggard face, Ted said: "Recently, what happened in the UK It's done, when you come back, let's go on vacation sometime? Even if it's a short weekend vacation."

Xiao Hang lowered his head silently, without answering, the passenger in front passed three more people, and then slowly said: "I won't come back this time."

"What do you mean?"

"I resigned and I am going back to work in China."

"It's so sudden, why didn't you mention it to me before." It's not that he never thought that Xiao Hang would return to China one day, and he would fly around without a fixed place, and would not mind staying in another country with him. But at least Xiao Hang had to discuss it with himself in advance.

Already at the gate of the security check, Xiao Hang said softly, "Let's break up", then walked over quickly with his head down.

The words "Let's break up", "Let's break up" echoed in Ted's mind over and over again, shaking his whole head.

Just staring blankly at Xiao Hang passing the security check, it took Ted a long time to come back to his senses.That's the way it is, no wonder you packed everything up and down this time, it doesn't look like you're going back to China for business, you're already prepared to never come back.

"I thought I dreamed you were leaving

i woke up crying

Watch the night wind blowing through the windowsill

can you feel my love

......"

Damn, is this mobile phone ringtone so suitable for the occasion? Wait, I must change it immediately.In fact, it was really too much for him to delay the showdown until the last moment, but every minute and every second with Ted was so sweet, he couldn't bear to say the word of breaking up no matter what.

Sighing, he picked up the phone——

"Xiao Hang, what do you mean?"

"Ted, let's get together and break up. I left the key to the villa with Daniel."

Ted was silent for a few seconds, and a voice as cold as ice came: "You don't want to throw away the key, and what I give will not be taken back. If you break up, you have to give me a reason."

Xiao Hang sighed again, and said: "There is no reason, I just decided to let go." Xiao Hang hung up the phone after finishing speaking.

Ted called again and the phone was turned off.Until watching the plane on the tarmac fly into the sky, Ted's eyes became more and more cold.

Very good, Xiao Hang, without any reason, without any warning, you sent me away just by breaking up, and I, Ted, am not a vegetarian.

Xiao Hang sat on the seat of the plane, he was seated by the window, looking at the familiar scenery of Nairobi outside the window, Xiao Hang's eyes were a little sore, and he pulled down the visor with a "snap" to block off the scenery outside the window.Ted should feel uncomfortable, but maybe he will be a little more angry at this moment?He looks very angry like an African lion, giving people a great sense of oppression, but he is so handsome that he can't take his eyes off him.Unconsciously rubbing the tail ring on the little finger, this ring must be sealed up after returning to China, looking at it will always remind me of the owner of another ring that is exactly the same.

The stewardess reminded Xiao Hang that the plane is about to take off, please open the sunshade, Xiao Hang has never felt that the delicate face of the stewardess is so annoying, so ah, many things are often the more you want to escape, the more you have to go face.The bustling Nairobi outside the window gradually went away, but Xiao Hang's tears still slid down uncontrollably, he quickly buried his head down, it was really embarrassing for such a big man to cry silently on the plane.I originally thought that I had been brewing for so long to end this relationship, that I should have been hurt, and that I should have given up, but at the moment when I really left, my heart still hurt uncontrollably.I don't know how long it will take to get out of this relationship.And what about Ted?Many years later, will you still remember having such a Chinese lover in Africa?

Sitting in front of the computer, Ted cracked Xiao Hang's MSN password, but it was a piece of cake for him.Within a few minutes, he opened Xiao Hang's MSN mailbox, browsed Xiao Hang's e-mails, and wrote down Yang Yue's e-mail address. Ted clicked on the e-mail and sent Yang Yue an e-mail.

Xiao Hang, I really don't understand your past, and I never thought about it. I thought it would be best for two people to fall in love and be together as simple as that, but——obviously you don't think so, so, from this moment I Ready to intervene in all your worlds.When we were together, I said that I would never let you go before you let go, but I didn't say that I would let you go if you let go.

When Xiao Hang returned to China, he stayed at Liu Bin's house. The hot summer in Guangzhou made people bored, and Xiao Hang's distraught appearance made Liu Bin really unbearable.

"Xiao Hang, why don't you eat something, if you starve to death here, I have to go to the Public Security Bureau to explain."

"It's hot, I don't want to eat." In fact, he didn't want to starve himself to death. He also ate a little bit every day, but it didn't meet Liu Bin's requirement of maintaining a normal man's calorie supply.

"I don't think you're hot." Xiao Hang didn't want to say it, so he didn't ask any more questions. It must be something wrong with their man.

Coming back this time, Liu Bin and his wife developed too fast. They got their certificates at the beginning of the year, and Yang Yue had a baby before they had time to set up a banquet.Liu Bin didn't mind Xiao Hang living here as a light bulb, anyway, he couldn't do much now, but his gloomy expression for such a day, really worried that it would affect Yang Yue's mood.

This afternoon, Xiao Hang was laying on the bed in a daze when his cell phone rang suddenly.He picked it up and looked at it. It was an unfamiliar number, and he picked it up casually. Just as he was about to say that you made a mistake, Ted's voice came out.

"Where are you?"

"I..." Xiao Hang visibly froze.

"Tell me your address, I know you are in Guangzhou."

Did he chase him to China?Why bother, I will never look back, sighed, Xiao Hang still told Ted the address, maybe he needs a reason to break up, so I can give him a reason.

"Yueyue, please accompany me to play a play." Liu Bin happened to go to work, and Ted came at the right time.

Yang Yue glanced at him with complicated eyes, but didn't speak.

Speaking of it, Xiao Hang is Yang Yue's first love. When you first love, people are easy to get into the horns. You always think that you can't live without that person. Once you walk out and look back, it turns out that it's nothing, and she didn't imagine it. I love Xiao Hang so much.During the four years we were together with Xiao Hang, they were always so indifferent, not so much love as it is her hot obsession after shaving her hair.So now, the two, no, plus Liu Bin, it should be said that the three of them can get along so harmoniously, which is weird but not surprising, anyway, Liu Bin doesn't mind, the past is all over, and she can't help but feel uncomfortable.But... Yang Yue was quite surprised that he left him because of a man, but there was still some comfort, after all, he had lost in gender, and there was nothing he could do about it.

"Come in and sit."

"There are people in the room, let's talk about it here." Ted looked at the women's shoes at the door and said.

Seeing Ted's tired look, Xiao Hang felt a little distressed, but he still tried his best to suppress this weakness: "Go in, don't you want to see my life now?"

Since Xiao Hang said so - Ted walked in generously, sat down on the sofa, and kept watching Yang Yue busily making tea and serving fruits.

"What else do you want to tell me?" Xiao Hang's disguise could not last long.

"Why did you break up with me?" Ted cut to the chase.

"Is the reason so important?" Xiao Hang sighed: "I am not born gay, I want to live a normal life."

Yes, in Xiao Hang's eyes, homosexuality was abnormal from the very beginning, but—"Didn't you say you would work hard for me?" Ted's intuition told him Xiao Hang's transformation and his mother's Inseparable from the relationship.

"I don't want to work hard anymore. In fact, I have a girlfriend in China, and that's Yang Yue."

"Girlfriend? You mean, women make you feel better than me?"

Ted's words made Xiao Hang feel ashamed for a moment, he clenched his fist, stared at Ted and said: "Yes, I was suppressed by you for a year, it was because I was blinded by the sun in Africa, so I wake up now , I’m still more used to being on top.”

"I don't believe that you still have someone else in your heart when you are with me." This year's deep love cannot be pretended.

"You are too narcissistic. My relationship with Yang Yue has never been broken. In fact, I left this time because Yang Yue is pregnant."

"So, are you going to be a father?" Ted showed a mocking smile: "How old are your children?" After speaking, he glanced at Yang Yue's flat belly.

"Two months," Xiao Hang paused, "Don't you believe it? Yueyue, show him the test report."

"No, I'm sure you won't joke about this kind of thing."

Ted approached Xiao Hang, stared into his eyes and asked seriously: "Xiao Hang, do you really decide to end it like this?"

Looking into Ted's dark blue eyes, there used to be deep affection, but now there is endless pain, but——Don't be soft-hearted, Xiao Hang exhausted all his strength, looked into Ted's eyes and said decisive words : "Yes, please don't come to harass my life again."

Ted stared at Xiao Hang for a while, then said in a deep voice, "Okay, as you wish."

Seeing Ted walk out of the room, Xiao Hang collapsed on the sofa, the words just now exhausted all his strength, and when hurting the person he loves the most, he was hurting himself.

"Xiao Hang, why do you..."

"Yueyue, stop talking, you don't understand, we won't be happy." Xiao Hang interrupted Yang Yue, and buried his face deeply in his palm.

Walking into the elevator, Ted still clenched his fists, and he couldn't feel the pain even when his nails sank deep into his palm.

Xiao Hang, you can say all decisive words, you are really ruthless.If I hadn't contacted Yang Yue in advance, I might have been deceived by his lies.However, even knowing that all of this is false, Xiao Hang, you little liar still ruthlessly dug into my heart with a knife.

I won't let go, but Xiao Hang, you backed down so easily, it's impossible not to let you suffer.Staring intently at the tail ring on his little finger, Ted told himself.