Confession

Lin Xu was sitting in front of the computer, typing on the keyboard with his slender fingers. A pair of anti-blue light glasses were placed on the bridge of his nose. The metal frame, the glasses legs were thin and hard, and the lenses glowed with a light yellow light, making him even more delicate literature and art.

He listened to the audio with earphones on, his expression focused, and he was completely immersed in the text. His hands were very fast, and he wrote a long story in less than a few minutes.

Lele lay on the bed and slept soundly, with one or two small snoring sounds.

"Ding——" the phone made a notification sound, and at the same time, a message popped up on the lock screen page, and the sound in the earphones was cut off for a moment.

Lin Xu recognized the sound of the notification tone, stopped and picked up the phone. It was a reminder he had set. The fourth episode of the "Chess Pieces" radio drama will be launched at [-] noon today.

It is now 11:59, he puts on his earphones and clicks into the app, waits for a while to get online, then downloads it to the local as soon as possible, and gives a reward by the way.

The radio drama started to charge for the third episode. The promotion of the platform was done well. In addition, Lin Xu reposted the Weibo of the radio drama, and the audience only increased a lot. .

Lin Xu listened to the latest episode of the radio drama, and started typing again.

Wei Hui’s timbre is actually different from Jiang Yang’s own voice, which is normal. This is the basic skill of a voice actor. Different characters have to create different timbres, and the shadow of his own voice can be heard in it, but more is for role service.

Each episode of a radio drama is usually about 10 to 45 minutes long. The content of this episode is quite full, with a total of [-] minutes, but it is not enough for Lin Xu.

He listened to one after another for 45 minutes, listening in his ears and knocking in his hands. Time passed unknowingly. Yes, there was no sound of typing on the keyboard, and the room was too quiet for a while.

Lin Xu stared at the screen in a daze. It has been like this for the past few days. He has arranged a lot of work for himself, immersing himself in stories every day, so that he will not be so empty, but once he stops, he will be empty, and messy thoughts will flood to.

It's been three days since Jiang Yang received his mother's call at the playground. He was in a hurry. He bought the latest high-speed train and didn't bring a change of clothes. He took a taxi directly to the station at the playground.

Before leaving, Jiang Yang endured his anxiety, looked at him guiltily, and said with a complicated expression: "I'm sorry, I planned to accompany you well today, and I..."

"What are you talking about? Of course your father's matter is more important," Lin Xu said. "A broken bone is not a trivial matter. You should go back and have a look. Although the previous incident was unpleasant, it is your parents after all."

Speaking of this, Lin Xu smiled bitterly, "My parents passed away, and I can't be filial if I want to."

Surprise flashed across Jiang Yang's face, and he was about to ask about it, but the taxi had already arrived, and Lin Xu urged him to leave quickly.

After getting in the car, Jiang Yang rolled down the window, telling him to be careful when he went back.

Lin Xu stood by the side of the road, watching the taxi go away until it completely disappeared from sight. He looked down at his fingers, which still had Jiang Yang's body temperature and tingling sensation.

He guessed what Jiang Yang wanted to say, he was pleasantly surprised and at the same time a little unbelievable, the other party's fiery and sincere eyes burned his heart, and he felt like he had fallen into a flame, illuminating his empty and cold heart, and got it sense of fullness.

For a moment, Lin Xu wanted to hold Jiang Yang's hand and say "I like you".

Past experience made him dare not take that step easily. Emotion is the most fragile and elusive thing. In friendship, he repeatedly hit the wall. The sincerity he held out was smashed and thrown back, so he was not sure whether love It will be the same, he likes Jiang Yang, but at the same time daunts him.

And... this call came at the right time, if it didn't come sooner or later, it just happened at this time, like an order, interrupted this beautiful dream, and made Lin Xu's wish come true. Fleeting, let him put away the little courage left.

Lin Xu regained consciousness from the memory, clicked on WeChat, and the 99+ messages were all birthday wishes from the editor, the person in charge of the cooperative publishing house, and the editor-in-chief of the magazine.

He didn't read it, and clicked on Zhiding WeChat. The message stayed three days ago. Jiang Yang took the initiative to tell him that he had arrived home. His father had a car accident and his foot was comminuted.

Lin Xu replied a good one, asking him to take good care of his uncle, and then there was no reply.

He stared at Jiang Yang's wechat profile picture for a long time, his eyes were dim, and finally the spirit lit up by Jiang Yang was extinguished again.

——Today is his 27th birthday, Jiang Yang promised him to celebrate it together, but now there is no news.

Lin Xu knew that Jiang Yang was taking care of his father, so it was impossible for him to ask, and he didn't want to mention it.

This is... still hard to hide the loss.

It was the first time in five years that he was looking forward to his birthday, and it turned out to be another empty fantasy.

Lin Xu took off his glasses and pressed his eyebrows. He had sat in front of the computer for a whole day. Now his back was sore and his wrist was sore and weak. When he turned his wrist, the muscles on his arm were throbbing.

He has been typing for many years, his hands are exhausted, his tenosynovitis is very serious, and his arms often hurt.

Lin Xu opened the drawer, took out the plaster and stuck it on himself, then lay on the bed, hugged Lele who had just showered, and buried his face in its fragrant hair, like hugging a large doll.

The dog's body temperature passed to Lin Xu, and he felt a little more secure. He covered Lele tightly with the quilt, and planned to fall asleep early like in previous years.

"Ding dong—" the doorbell rang.

Lin Xu opened his eyes, thinking he had heard wrong.

"Ding dong——" the doorbell rang again, and Lele raised her head to look in the direction of the bedroom door.

Lin Xu doesn't have any friends, and it's only his birthday, so he can find someone on this day...

He threw off the quilt and got out of bed without even wearing slippers, and walked quickly to the entrance, Lele also jumped up and followed.

Every step he took, his heart beat faster, and by the time he reached the door, his heart was already beating up to his throat.

Lin Xu's palms were sweating, with a smile already on his face, he stretched out his hand to open the door.

"Surprise!" Yang Xiaoling stood at the door with a cake and presents, looking at Lin Xu excitedly, "Happy birthday, baby!"

Lin Xu's smile froze, and the raised corners of his mouth slowly curled into a line. After looking at Yang Xiaoling for a few seconds, he slowly said, "Why are you here?"

"It's your birthday, how could I not come?" Yang Xiaoling squeezed in, took off his shoes at the door, and walked in on his own.

Lin Xu closed the door and said calmly, "You know it's been a long time since my birthday."

"That's because we didn't get along well, and you didn't let me come." Yang Xiaoling put the cake and gifts on the table, and said with a smile, "Xu Xu, you have already called me and are willing to buy clothes from me, yes Doesn't it mean that we are reconciled? Now that we are reconciled, I will come for your birthday."

"Hey, when did you raise a dog?" Yang Xiaoling's eyes fell on Lele, and he patted Lele's head, "Good boy, are you going to shed your hair? What's your name?"

"Lele."

Lele just took a bath today, and her body smells delicious. Yang Xiaoling liked it so much, she squatted on the ground and rubbed and hugged her.

Lin Xu sat on the sofa, lit a cigarette, and white mist spewed out from his thin lips, "Xiao Ling, it's really not my birthday, so there's no need for you to come over."

"Obviously before your birthday, I will come, and on my birthday you also..." Yang Xiaoling stopped talking and watched Lin Xu's reaction nervously, for fear that he would be unhappy, "Xu Xu, you are still worrying about the original Are things angry? You still mind... don't you?"

"I'm not angry, and I don't mind." Lin Xu smoked a cigarette and looked at him very calmly, "It's been a long time since this incident, I don't have so much energy to just worry about this incident, you don't have to do that Cautiously, Dr. Zhao said that my illness has been cured, and I am not taking any medicine, and my mood and spirit are stable."

Yang Xiaoling breathed a sigh of relief, "That's good...Xu Xu, you don't know, I still dream of you covered in blood, if I hadn't come to your house to apologize to you, you would have..."

"I don't want to mention the past, and you don't have to blame yourself for the past." Lin Xu held a cigarette, and the sparks flickered on and off, like a relationship that was about to go out, "But Xiaoling, long before you and I We all know that we can't go back to the past, and I don't want to waste time on friendship anymore. You don't have to think that I am targeting you, I don't. I don't trust anyone now, and I know I can't rely on anyone. I only believe in myself and rely on Own."

Yang Xiaoling's eyes were red, and she squatted on the ground and looked up at him, "Xu Xu, I know I'm sorry for you... I don't deserve to be your best friend, but... even if we can't go back to the past, I want to be with you." Can't you? I'll just be your most ordinary friend."

After Lin Xu finished smoking a cigarette, he pressed the cigarette butt into the ashtray, and the spark was completely extinguished, "If I still mind, will I take the initiative to contact you? Can you help me?"

Yang Xiaoling's eyes lit up, and he stood up from the ground, "Na Xuxu, then we..."

"I've forgiven you a long time ago." Lin Xu looked at him, the corners of his mouth twitched, but there was no smile in his eyes, "I will do my best to help you when you need help in the future, but Xiaoling, I and You, that's the only way to go."

Yang Xiaoling nodded, his eyes were wet, and he smiled through tears, "I understand, don't worry, I know you need a process, whether it's five years or ten years, in my heart our relationship is still the same as before, it has never changed !"

Lin Xu didn't answer the conversation. To be precise, he didn't know what to say.

The way Yang Xiaoling yelled at him five years ago is still vivid in his memory, and those heart-wrenching words are still in his ears.

He had a terrible headache, and his past was a mess. As long as these topics were involved, he found that all these years of hard work with treatment and recovery were all false.

——He is like a patient who collects grievances. Others remember his bad things clearly, and engrave everything he has experienced on his heart. He is obviously in extreme pain, but he still has to remember it fresh.

"Xuxu, let me celebrate your birthday." Yang Xiaoling adjusted his mood and said enthusiastically, "I've come all the time, and I brought you a gift."

Lin Xu shook his head, pressed his temples, and said wearily: "No, I don't have the habit of celebrating birthdays anymore."

Yang Xiaoling saw that his expression was not good, and was worried about his mood swings. She also knew that it was good that their relationship had progressed like this, and she couldn't force him anymore, otherwise it would be counterproductive and annoying.

So Yang Xiaoling accepted it as soon as he saw it, "Okay, okay, listen to you, then I will take the cake away, and you accept the gift. It's not a birthday gift, but a meeting gift for visiting friends."

Lin Xu didn't want to keep entangled with him, so he nodded, "Do you have anything else to do? I'm very tired and need to rest."

With such an obvious eviction order, it was impossible for Yang Xiaoling to stay any longer. He brought a cake to say goodbye to Lin Xu, and said he would come back to him in a few days.

They used to be close friends who grew up together, but now they have been cold for five years. At the beginning, Lin Xu's words were too decisive, and Yang Xiaoling didn't dare to go to him halfway, so he had to wait until Lin Xu contacted him on his own initiative, and took advantage of his birthday to come to the door.

Now that Lin Xu was willing to accept this friendship, it was beyond Yang Xiaoling's expectations. Even though he didn't celebrate Lin Xu's birthday, he left contentedly.

He was satisfied, but Lin Xu felt depressed and flustered. He sat in the living room and smoked two or three cigarettes, and there was an extremely quiet humming in his ears.

Lin Xu didn't know if what he said and did was correct, and he began to regret why he had contacted Yang Xiaoling to buy clothes for convenience.

All the things he has experienced have made him unable to distinguish people's hearts. The chance meeting with Guo Shule and the entanglement with Yang Xiaoling made Lin Xu feel as if he was weighed down by a boulder and out of breath.

The people and things he tried so hard to escape, after years of peace, began to appear before his eyes again.

Jiang Yang took him out of the high wall with great difficulty, and then shrank back so easily.

Lin Xu slumped on the sofa, heaved a long sigh, feeling extremely tired, the pain in his wrist and head whipped his nerves and body.

He got up and walked into the room, just wanting to sleep well at this moment.

The doorbell rang again, Lin Xu frowned.

Yang Xiaoling has always had the problem of being forgetful. He used to go to school to look for him and often left things in the dormitory.

Lin Xu reckoned that he should be the one who came back to get things, so he didn't have a good face to open the door.

As soon as the door opened, a piece of cake lit with candles was first handed to Lin Xu, with a circle of candles inserted on it, and the yellowish light shone on his surprised face.

Jiang Yang stood at the door, holding the cake in both hands, with sweat on his forehead, panting, with a gentle and flying smile on his face.

"Senior, happy birthday."