Moon Huaying in the Deep Forest

Early the next morning, I found out that Su Shuo actually replied to my message.

"Some things, I say now, you probably won't listen to them. Maybe it's not appropriate for me to say, but I just want to say. I won't comment on the character of your water cup senior, after all, I'm not familiar with it. I just hope You are happy, I just hope you have a good life, others have nothing to do with me. It is your business that you love him, and it is my business that I protect you. I don't know how your love has made you talk like this. , but I just don’t want you to deny yourself and demean yourself. Can you understand? Weren’t you very confident back then? To be honest, I don’t feel that he is as good as you said. On the contrary, I think there is something about you It’s all good, no one is worthy of it. So, don’t fuck around thinking about it every day, study hard, understand? Study hard when you are in school, and make money when you are working, so you can live a good life, understand?”

In fact, sometimes, I understand the truth, but I just want to dig into the dead end.Now that Su Shuo is persuading me so wholeheartedly, of course I have to listen.

He said, he didn't know how I fell in love and talked about myself like this.He also said, I was very confident back then, why am I so timid now.

I was really confident back then.

When I first entered junior high school, on the day of the report, the teacher asked us to stand on the podium and introduce ourselves.Standing on the podium, with a fierce spirit, I said in front of everyone that I want everyone to like me. I hope that in the future, everyone will think of me in the past three years in junior high school and immediately think of me.

But friendship and love are different, right?Being confident in friendship doesn't mean you can be the same in love.

In the evening, Su Shuo sent another message: "Are you there? Let's compare!"

"Better than what?"

"It's better than who does more questions every day."

"??? Are you serious? You started working so hard before you were in the third year of high school?"

"Speak as if you're not working hard now. Besides, it's not just for studying. You bought me too many questions. I can't finish writing. I need some motivation. You said that as soon as you put down the pen You will think wildly, so find a way to keep you from putting down your pen. We can compare like this, and we can achieve multiple goals at one stroke, so great."

I can't count how many times this is the first time I have expressed such emotion: "Why are the people around me so nice, I really don't know how to say thank you."

He also thought I was long-winded: "You are an idiot, why are you telling me these things!"

Driven by the desire to win, I began to try to let the topic occupy all the space in my mind.

In the eyes of my parents, their son is determined to study hard again.So they began to persuade me with pride and distress: "Don't suffer too much, no matter how much it is for grades, you can't do this. Your body is more important than grades."

How dare I say that I am in love?Of course, it would not be said that I study hard so that I can temporarily forget Lin Wuhua and forget the troubles caused by love.However, since we got good grades in the end, there is no need to say these things!

Just like in a chemistry problem, sometimes a substance A is prepared, and B will be obtained along with it.Some people want A, some people want B, that is normal, the best of both worlds.I want A, then B is a by-product to me, and I want B, then A is a by-product to me.Life is not a matter of chemistry. Products and by-products are good things anyway, and there are people who want them, so why are they so clearly distinguished?

What's more, my happiness and my parents' happiness are not two completely opposite things. It is better for everyone to be happy.

You are busy, I am busy, everyone is busy, people at work and school are busy in their own way, so the chatting of our family of three seems to only happen at the dinner table.

I slurped my food and said vaguely: "I've been learning from Su Shuo recently."

Upon hearing this, my mother began to sigh again: "Oh, Xiao Su is a good boy. How is Xiao Su doing in the No. [-] Middle School now? How likely will she be in the exam?"

"I met his dad a while ago, and I asked his dad about it. It seems that he has been stable in the top ten." My dad stretched out his chopsticks to pick up a piece of egg: "Hey, Su Shuo is really smart! This kid is also a good person , is a down-to-earth and good boy, no matter where he goes in the future, he will definitely be right!"

I was busy eating, stuffed my mouth full, choked so much that I doubted my life, so I could only nod my head in agreement.

My mother asked me again: "You classmates in junior high school, are you and Xiao Su here now? You should take care of each other, after all, only you and him have the deepest relationship. Son, you usually care about Xiao Su, he I don’t have anyone I know in No. [-] Middle School, so I’m so lonely.”

I unscrewed the water glass and took a sip of water: "Mom, I'm already a sophomore in high school, how could it be possible that I don't know anyone yet. Besides, No. [-] Middle School and No. [-] Middle School are too far away, and I can't reach them even if I want to take care of them."

"If you have time, just care about a few words. This can be done, right? Don't let Xiao Su be alone in No. [-] High School, do you hear me?"

I nodded indiscriminately, put on my cotton school uniform and rushed out: "I'm going to school!"

At 11:30, the evening self-study of the third year of high school ended, and I squeezed into the crowd with my schoolbag on my back.Someone patted me on the shoulder, and I turned my head to see that it was Lin Wuhua.He smiled at me, but the people around were rushing out, and we were pushed farther and farther apart.After school is always a happy thing, surrounded by chaos.I turned around again, Lin Wuhua waved at me: "Bye!" I waved my arm vigorously: "Bye!"

When I got home, I took off my cotton school uniform and lay on the bed in my autumn school uniform jacket. I always felt that what happened tonight was familiar, as if I had experienced it once before.When I was thinking hard, I suddenly remembered that Shen Qiyang and I said goodbye to each other on the way home, laughing so hard that we covered our faces and rolled around on the bed.

Without Lin Wuhua, I seemed to have no strength, and slowly relaxed.When Lin Wuhua was by my side, I always wanted to compare with him, so even if I wanted to be lazy occasionally, I always gritted my teeth and persisted.But now, without Lin Wuhua by my side, I have no reference, and I want to sleep as soon as I get home, even earlier than the first year of high school.

Lin Wuhua sent me a photo. In the photo are several thick question books and a stack of papers.

He sent two voices, this is the first time he has sent me a voice.I put on the earphones, brought the phone to my ear, and carefully clicked on the voice message.

Oh, I brought earphones, why do I have to hold my phone close to me.

In the first voice, he said: "I'm so miserable."

The second voice is automatically played: "Today our math teacher was giving homework and asked us to take out the 'big book', but I forgot to take it to school. There is only the booklet in the school bag. I can only read it secretly. Xu Chunyu's was discovered by the teacher, and he stood behind the class for a whole class."

When I heard this, I puffed my mouth on the phone.Obviously it’s not a big deal, I just laughed when the water glass was broken and burned my hand, but it’s just being punished to stand, it doesn’t look like I would feel wronged…

I asked him, "Are you kidding me?"

Putting down the phone, I felt strange again.If he got the first place in the exam, he should move to the first row. How did he secretly read Xu Chunyu's homework?

I asked him, "Didn't you get the first place in the last exam? Why didn't you change your seat?"

He said that after the third year of high school, there will be no seat changes.

Lin Wuhua is very busy, but still very concerned about my grades.He wanted me to send him the transcripts of the quiz and the monthly exam, but my refusal was invalid.He would only feel dissatisfied after reading it, and asked me: "Your ranking has dropped a bit, and it can't be regarded as a normal fluctuation. Have you been lazy recently? Are you studying hard? Are there many questions you don't know? "

Because of the decline in grades, I was called to the office by the head teacher for several days in a row to talk, so I was very anxious, and I didn't want him to always bring up the grades.I asked him: "It's so hard to chat a few words, why do I always have to ask about grades! Do I only have grades in my life? If my grades are not good, do you dislike me?"

I thought he would comfort me, but what I didn't expect was that he suddenly became very serious: "Am I kidding you? Don't you work hard for our future? If you don't even pay this little If you don’t want to, if you can’t even endure this bit of hardship, what are you talking about looking forward to our future? I’m a third year in high school, are you just distracting me like this? Seriously, I really don’t feel that you like me.”

He would suddenly get angry, which I didn't expect.How could he be suddenly angry?He is obviously not such a person. When we were not together, he didn't get angry because I was distracted when I asked him questions, and he didn't keep asking impolitely.He is a very understanding and considerate person.

I pissed off such a nice person, so, it must be my fault?Well, then I have to apologize, and I should.Besides, he cared about my grades for my own good, so why am I so ungrateful?

I sent my sincere essay, but he didn't reply.I stood in front of the phone, not daring to take my eyes off it. The screen of the phone went dark and was turned on again by me. The available time on the screen was exhausted, so I unlocked the time lock again.

After a long time, he said, "I still have something to do, so I won't talk about it."

I said, good.

I said again, don't be angry, I'm sorry, I will change it.

He didn't reply me again.

I canceled the available time length lock.

Late at night is really suitable for random thinking. I lay on my back on the bed, clutching the slightly hot phone in my hand, and my heart was in a mess.

I thought a lot, from the small composition I sent out half an hour ago, all the way I thought of my childhood expectations for love and marriage.

What kind of love was I looking forward to?When I was a child, I watched a lot of Xianxia dramas. I want my childhood sweetheart, my childhood sweetheart, my ten-year long-distance love race to achieve a positive result, my life as a couple, my wings and my sword, and my love for life.Looking at it now, it is impossible for childhood sweethearts and swords to travel to the end of the world. Then, can we achieve a long-distance love race to achieve a positive result and a couple for a lifetime?

To grow old together?can we

I thought back to when I first met him.At that time, I wanted to get close to him, but I was afraid that he would get close.Perhaps people sometimes fall into this strange contradiction.At that time, I had the courage to plunge forward, but now I am timid.

Late at night will make me think about it, and if I think too much, I will feel even more insecure.

As a witness to these stories, I always put myself in my shoes, seeing everything around me to the best of my ability.But fans of the authorities, like shooting the world through a fisheye lens, have to admit the existence of barrel distortion.It seems that until today, I have really stood in the distance, looking carefully at everything about me and Lin Wuhua.

It was only today that I discovered that I don't quite understand Lin Wuhua's thoughts.

How did that happen?

I'm so full of worries that I can't sleep, but who should I tell?Only Su Shuo, Xu Chunyu, and Shen Qiyang knew that Lin Wuhua and I were together.Xu Chunyu and Shen Qiyang are now in their third year of high school, they are in a critical period, and they are friends of Lin Wuhua. Compared to me, Lin Wuhua must be closer to them, so I definitely can't say anything to them.Su Shuo?Su Shuo is in No. [-] Middle School, and he is so busy all day long that he only knows how to study. I definitely can't talk to Su Shuo about this.

Thinking of this, I feel so hopeless again.Why is life like this?