[sherlock] Spirit and flesh

Psychology of human behavior is not too profound. I have grasped the know-how and essence of this science since I was 8 years old. I have used it to deduce the hearts of many people, but it often results in some counterproductive effects when applied to John. For example, when I think that a person will never be angry, John will be so angry that he will jump his feet and beat me up. But when I think that a person should be so scared that his legs are weak and he will run away with his head in his arms, John will be as resolute as a hero.

He looked around, still not looking at me, and if he looked at me, it would not be more than a second, he stood in front of the dusty fireplace, "I shouldn't be walking around, should I, Sherlock, so as not to spoil the scene."

"En." I responded casually and focused my attention on the magnifying glass in my hand, but I couldn't get rid of the troubled thoughts just now. I straightened up and took a deep breath of the air. There are many chemical symbols in the air. It brushes past the frontal lobe of my brain, but I don't care about these vivid and charming chemical symbols at the moment. Before John appeared, chemistry was all I had, and the mystery was my lover.

I couldn't help but look for him with my eyes.

I found it quickly.

He stood amidst the dust and light, his golden hair reflected some halos, the creases at the corners of his eyes contained firmness, kindness, gentleness and tenacity, he pursed his mouth but the corners of his mouth were always raised, his The nose is a bit big and the nose is clumsy, but the dots on his face look very attractive and cute. He checks those window frames and those spider webs with eyes that don't know anything. He is deliberately avoiding me.

I heard myself sigh.

I held the foldable portable magnifying glass and twirled it between my fingers. I held its hard handle and paced among the dusty and dilapidated furniture, thinking in my heart, what did I do to my John?Why doesn't he want to see me anymore?Like I'm the least worthy thing in the world for him to watch.I look at the broken mirror in this ruin, I look at my face in the mirror.

How do I look in his heart?

John once described me to those fans on his blog. He described my facial features without any emotion. My skeleton was written by him as if it was twisted out of steel bars. My nose is the endorsement of arrogance , and my eyes are sharp and clear, superb, my fingers are fast machinery, free between the glass test tube and the metal tweezers, but he did not express between the lines what he thinks about my nose, eyes, and mouth attitude.

I have known him for 9 years and he has never expressed any affection for my looks.

I've decided, I'm going to test him now, I'm going to peel off his inner shell, unload his armor, peek into his secrets, I want to know him thoroughly, I want to see what he does to my five senses Thoughts, am I really so annoying that I can't get into his eyes at all.

I approached him slowly, and pried open his stubborn mouth with gossip, "What did you find?"

"It's very dilapidated, like it hasn't been lived in for 100 years."

"There is no 100 years, it is 56 years. Look at the letter on the desk, there is a date on the postmark."

"Oh yes, but the client said that he saw someone here. He thought he had run into a ghost and couldn't sleep at night. I don't believe in ghosts. Do you believe it? Did you think about the corpse when you whipped it?" Your ghost is staring at you resentfully?"

I smiled, "Ah! My horsewhip has never broken a bone. After I get the data that can subvert evidence science, they will be immortalized in the archives. I believe their ghosts will forgive me. See Here, John, there are indeed traces of human activity here, very subtle, but I found it." I walked up to him, John stepped aside, I grabbed his arm, and suppressed my smile.

He stared at me with wide eyes, "Why did I provoke you?"

I stared at him for a long time, from the corners of his brows to the collar of his shirt, from the bottom of his trousers to the laces of his shoes, all of which were completed within 3 seconds, and he spent a whole week The schedule is exposed in front of my eyes, whether it is his randomly arranged old friend gathering or his video recording plan, I can see through everything except his foggy heart.

I said in a low voice, "If someone asked what Sherlock Holmes was like in your heart, how would you describe me, John?"

"Didn't I describe enough in the blog? Lifelike."

"No, John, you don't understand me, I'm not talking about the narrative, you understand? Do you know how I would describe you to outsiders? Do you want to know?"

John looked a little flustered, "You...you described it too, when I got married for the first time...at my wedding, you said I was you in front of all the guests," he gasped, "saying I'm the nicest person you'll ever meet."

"Yes, John, this is the description. What kind of person am I in your heart? Besides arrogant and weird, can you put a few more adjectives on me?"

"Sherlock... are you trying to embarrass me?"

"Of course not, I'm not making it hard for you, John, you don't know where to start, you don't know which word to start, let me take your first wife as an example, I don't care if I respect her like this or not , I don't care because I just wanted to bring her up, it's been 5 years since she passed away, you know how I would describe her, a dangerous woman, an unpredictable woman, eccentric, mysterious, high-end acting, good at deception , elusive, many enemies, smart, super smart, that's how I'd describe her, you know how I'd describe your second wife, listen, look at me, don't look away, look at me, John! Your second wife, I would say, was dark-haired, tall, with slender, sensitive fingers, snow-white, stern, with gray eyes."

John is breathing hard in front of me and I realize he's clenching his teeth, but I'm not going to stop until I get there, the truth is right in front of me, I just have to dust it off.

So I went on, "John, would you like to hear, if your blog fans need to bring up Sherlock Holmes in front of others, what do they usually say about me? Look at me! Stop looking that way, my face is on Here, you have to look at me! Listen to me, John, fans of your blog, when those people mention me, they will say, Holmes is a man who lives with danger, Holmes has more enemies than stars, They will say Holmes is unpredictable, eccentric, mysterious, high-end acting, deceitful, elusive, and smart, beyond the ordinary, they will say Holmes has black hair, is tall, has a delicate His fingers were snow-white, his face was serious, and his eyes... were gray."

I heard the sound of John's teeth being gritted, and he stared at me with a little resentment. I have seen this kind of look before, those clients whose privacy I have revealed will stare at me so resentfully, those who The privacy that I am most reluctant to reveal in front of people in daily life is exposed to the sun without any delay, and it is smoking.

John stared at me that way.

"Are you satisfied?" He restrained his temper, and I felt his body trembling with anger in my hands.

I let go of him in surprise, which was completely different from the reaction I expected. I expected him to smile bitterly, then patted my shoulder and said that my deduction was really accurate and unparalleled.

Come on, what's there to be angry about John Watson?

He is an honest person, and he has always respected facts as much as I do. Yes, no, no, and I should be right about these arguments. The correct rate should be perfect, but I think he is tense now. On the bowstring that was about to break, I felt that he was going to jump up and smash my nose bone with his forehead, just like when he vented his anger on me before, I stopped my continuous cannon and stood beside him without saying a word. before.

John raised his head sullenly, clenched his fists, and I doubt that the fists will come to my face at any moment.

"Do you have to think that I really use my wife as your substitute? You have to spoil the people who have been buried in the coffin like this? I love them, not because they are like you, there is something in them that I admire The advantage, it's not because of you," John was trembling with excitement, "Which onion do you think you are? Sherlock Holmes, I like women, no matter how good you are, how you show off in front of my eyes, I like women, I will never There will be a result with you, never, I will tell you now, every one of my wives has nothing to do with you, you are being self-indulgent, you have to admit that there are really coincidences in the world, yes, they have coincidences with you point, but one thing, one thing is that they are completely different from you, that is, they, without you, so, bastard."

I feel frustrated, my mouth is a little dry, I feel uncomfortable, I take a step back, I should go back to the work at hand, I hope for the stars and the moon, I have been looking forward to this interesting commission for half a month. As for the case of the ghost man, yes, I should put my brilliant talents to work.

"I'm sorry, John..." I said in a low voice, my arrogance and my self-esteem suffered unprecedented embarrassment and insult, and I was being crushed by him.

"Everyone thinks I love you, even my wife has questioned me like this, saying that the most important person in my heart is none other than you, but unfortunately, I am not gay, and you have said that you are not, and now I don't care if you are or not, anyway I don't like men, I didn't like it before, and I won't like it in the future, the couple next door are married and sleeping together, it's not funny at all, I don't like this kind of joke, It's a bit blunt for me to say that, and it might even break your heart, but I've got to be honest, at least to you, Sherlock, I'm not interested in men."

"I know." John's sexual orientation has never changed, he has always liked the opposite sex, I know that, he said it and I always remember it, my behavior tonight was really wrong, I was wrong, So wrong, I think my brother has a handicap in judging my communication skills, and I'm starting to think he's right now.

I lowered my head as if I had done something wrong, "I won't do this again..."

"Yes, you really shouldn't do this anymore. We are still friends. You have an extraordinary position in my heart, surpassing many people. I am willing to die for you. If it can be exchanged for your survival, I will not even die. , but it doesn't mean that I have to become your damn bed partner, it makes me uncomfortable, don't imply me like this, or try to misinterpret my sexuality."

"Bed partner? I didn't say you have to become my bed partner..."

"Yes, Sherlock, remember what you said today in front of John Watson, there will be no relationship like that between us, nothing like that, absolutely not."

I was taught a lesson and nodded in front of him, "I understand."

"You'd better really understand," John added, "because you and I have nothing but a life-and-death friendship."

I can't continue sticking around in front of him, or my lips will keep trembling, I immediately turn around, pick up my magnifying glass awkwardly, point my back at him, and aim my eyes at a meaningless place. Dust, "Yes, John, nothing more, let's go back to the ruins, I welcome your questions."

I saw that my fingers holding the magnifying glass turned blue and white due to excessive force.

For many days, I have been stuck in his harsh lesson. I stood in front of the window frowning. My eyebrows have never been so tired, because they have not been stretched for dozens of hours. I stared at Outside the window, and occasionally there was the sound of typing on the keyboard behind me. I looked back at my roommate with my trousers pocket, and he just raised his head to look at me.

"What's wrong, Sherlock? Are you in trouble?" He read my sadness in my face.

"Yes, John, I have some questions that I don't understand." I returned my eyes to the street view. I live not far from the river, and I can vaguely see the London Eye facing Big Ben. Gray and desolate London frowned.

Hearing John speak again, "I said Sherlock, have you lost your clue?"

"...Well." I admitted that I was a little absent-minded about the case, and I tried my best to answer him, "No, John, the case went well, and there is only one suspect left for my investigation, but I have some hypoglycemia, I have a little I'm dizzy, I haven't eaten for a long time."

John stared at me with big blue eyes. He rolled his eyes, obviously using the logic function of the left brain to recall, and then he said with certainty, "3 days."

What I can't remember, my scottish terrier does, I'm dying of starvation, an ignominious death for a consulting detective, so I stuff my miniature John into the mouth In the bag, we took it to the restaurant where we often stopped, and sat around.

While waiting for dinner, he was busy messing with the crossword puzzle in the magazine, scratching the stupid pencil tip, sticking out his tongue and licking his mouth every now and then, which I do occasionally, usually behind his back Just kidding, last time I studied Copernicus’s heliocentric theory, he made fun of me for a few months, saying that I was reading children’s textbooks, why did the useless knowledge that the earth revolves around the sun have to be accepted from the age of 3?When I was 3 years old, I used 14 kinds of knives to dissect parrots, and no one told me that if I don't learn astronomy, I won't grow taller.But I did make up my mind to overthrow John's false accusation that my knowledge of astronomy is shallow.

He looked up at me in the candlelight, and smiled slightly, "Look, there is this candle every time I come here."

The candle in the crystal cup flickered in his pupils, John smiled and laughed, shaking his head, "Your memory is unmatched, you can still remember what you were doing when we first sat here nine years ago what?"

"I remember I made you forget a crutch."

John laughed cutely, and then he went back to reading his magazine quietly, I stared at his hair, I took a breath, "John."

"how?"

"You're not interested in men."

He stared at me, "I thought I made that clear enough a few days ago..."

"Yes, you said that you are not interested in men, but interest can be cultivated, just like Copernicus, I have never been interested in him. I was stimulated by you, so I went to see Heliocentric Such nonsense."

John blinked, "Damn...what the hell are you trying to say."

"I just need to make you interested in men, my John, I can't stand your eyes leaving me, I can't bear it for a second, before you got married, you have another woman, I can't do anything, but You are now single again. I didn’t take the chance when this happened for the first time. I was helpless in the face of death just like you. Now God gave me a second chance. I think I believe in God Yes, you come back to 221B, what is the meaning of this."

"My fucking wife just died, you want to say this is God giving you a chance? You can't wait to flirt with me now?" John looked at me with that murderous look again, my face was in front of his eyes Shaking a little uncomfortable, I feel like I am a bit like a target for his gun, but I still try my best to meet his eyes with courage.

I am a person who likes to face challenges. I never give up easily. I am unyielding and able to move forward firmly. I believe that John lives with me because of this. He regards me as his best friend and treats me as a rare piece treasure.

"Yes, John," I said firmly, "You like me very much, but because I'm a man, I can't let you develop a further relationship with me. I want to keep you, John, and change the gender." This kind of thing is too cumbersome and I also think it is redundant, I just need to let you change the traditional concept, reverse your sexual orientation, make you have a strong attraction to things that you were not interested in before, make you like men, and make you love men from now on. Obsessed with it, making you feel like Sherlock Holmes is no worse than a woman, I'm sure it won't be hard."

"It's not fucking hard?" John fussed, his voice getting high, the magazine in his hand was almost torn by his nails, and his volume was so loud that it sounded to the next table, "You know what you're saying What the hell is that, Holmes? Have you shot the goddamn cocaine again? You're fucking talking about breaking me!"

I stared at him intently.

After a long time, I picked up the coffee on the table and took a sip, "Let's go to the small country for a few days, my John? The suspect, he is hiding in a certain manor, waiting for me to go play hide-and-seek with him, I've rented a country farmhouse and we'll have a few days of vacation after the case is done."

John stared at me blankly, his eyes were full of disbelief, I pulled a bright smile in front of his eyes, "Of course there are two rooms, what I want is that you are interested in me, obsessed with me and Never get rid of me, I'm not going to make you my bed partner, we don't need sex, we don't even need love words."

I heard John gulp, so loud that I mistook him for swallowing a walnut or a cat.