That's it

Life is still hazy and colorless.This lifeless computer can't see any life even when the screen is on.Xiang Ping was just used to opening it, and hadn't figured out what to do yet.One wants to get in touch but can't, and the other wants to get in touch but shouldn't.Nothing else attracted him.Unexpectedly, the miracle reappeared today. From the flickering of Guben's profile picture, the whole world started to beat, and the heartbeat suddenly accelerated.

Gu Ben imagined that after so many days, Xiang Ping should calm down and get out of the pain.His previous kindness will undoubtedly aggravate Xiang Ping's pain, so give Xiang Ping some time to think calmly.

Gu Ben: Hello.

Tranquility: Black tea, green tea, chrysanthemum tea, I miss you so much.

Gu Ben: I miss you too.It must be very cold in the Northeast!Pay attention to your body!

Ping Ping: Twenty degrees below zero, I'm used to it.Are you still that busy?I think about you everyday.

Gu Ben: I'm not too busy right now, I'm going back to Taiwan in a few days, the weather over there is fine, but it's too cold here, it's not easy.

Jingpingping: I thought you were busy.

Xiang Ping became more dependent on him, and Gu Ben hesitated for a long time with his head down, without a trace of a smile on his face.Xiang Ping was also extremely serious, as if he had been waiting for several years, and seeing him again was filled with emotion.Gu Ben: I just came back from Chongqing and stayed for half a month.

Tranquility: Why are you going to Chongqing?On business trip?

Gu Ben: I know a kid from Chongqing who played with me for half a month.

Xiang Pingxin shook violently and his brain buzzed. The news almost made him unable to sit still.Hold on with difficulty.

Ping Ping: I found a friend, congratulations.

Gu Ben: Thank you, you also find someone to warm your quilt.

Tranquility: Hehe, yes.I envy you.

After that there was a period of stillness.Gu Ben's bitter smile had already numb his cheeks, waiting for Xiang Ping's reaction, he really didn't know what to say when he saw Xiang Ping's face.Xiang Ping tried to let himself accept this fact, trying to calm himself down and be magnanimous.

Gu Ben: You will too.

Ping Ping: How do you know each other?

Orphan: Introduced by a friend.

Ping Ping: How do you feel?

Gu Ben: Very good, I can see that he is sincere to me. I am already middle-aged, and I am content to have someone who is willing to accompany me.

Tranquility: Treat him well!Finding the right one is not easy.

Gu Ben: It's cold and you need to find someone to help you warm the quilt.

Ping Ping: I want to, but I don’t need it.

Today is the slowest chat ever.There are stiff smiles on their faces.Sometimes it takes a long time to say the last sentence.It was also the least talked about time.

Orphan: What do you do in winter?

Ping Ping: Much the same with minor differences, nothing different.

Gu Ben: What a pity.Seeing you but not eating you.

Ping Ping: It’s not the same, it won’t be needed in the future.It seems that we can only be friends without distracting thoughts.

Gu Ben: I'm tired and I want to sleep.Chat another day.

Ping Ping: Yes.Bye-Bye.I wish you happiness.

Gu Ben chatted until it was really impossible to go on, he felt his chest was suffocated, he took a long breath and then turned off the video, without even a goodbye gesture.Xiang Ping's disappointment and unusual calm made him feel uneasy.

In just a few words of chatting, Xiang Ping seemed to be enlightened, and he understood that the person he had been madly in love with for a long time was just for him to have nothing to do to relieve boredom.But why do you feel powerless?He didn't know either, he only knew that all the waiting and hope were in vain.I kept telling myself that it would never happen again.He just got tired of the computer all of a sudden, he didn't have the heart to shut down the running programs normally, he unplugged the power directly and fell on the bed without taking off his clothes.Everything came too suddenly, and my brain went blank for a while and became confused for a while.In addition to being uncomfortable, maybe you can comfort yourself, otherwise, what should I do?This false love can finally end, it's time to let go, and it seems to feel a little relaxed again.He wanted to sleep but couldn't, his chest was pressed by something heavy and he couldn't breathe.I really want to get a bottle of liquor, but I think it's meaningless after thinking about it.Sometimes I feel ridiculous that I was tormented by online dating.Those who thought it was true felt so ridiculous that they laughed and shed tears.

In the past two days, Xiang Ping seemed to be sick, without any vitality, but his work was still normal.This is the busiest time of the year and also the time with the best sales.Work can reduce the pain of being alone a little bit.In the past two nights, Xiang Ping was very strange with his family, trying to distract himself.Back in the room, I restrained myself from opening that QQ again.On the third day he still couldn't control his hand.Found that the orphan asked him "Are you there" at different times every day?The avatar is on.Still asking a few minutes ago.

Gu Ben: Are you okay?

Gu Ben: Miss you very much.Are you there?

Ping Ping: Hehe.

Gu Ben: What are you doing?

Ping Ping: Looking for a man.

Guben: Did your first time happen?

Tranquility: I was waiting for you, but now it’s in vain.

Gu Ben: Let me see you.

Ping Ping: Be quiet!It's better not to watch.

Gu Ben: I want to see my Northeast brother.Don't you want to see me?

Ping Ping: You are not my type after seeing you.Hold on to your doll!Is he not there?

Gu Ben: I'm not here, I'm going back, only you are with me.

Jingpingping: I'm not in the mood to accompany you now.

Gu Ben: Look at me drunk.

Ping Ping: Forget it, I'm afraid it will cause my restlessness.

Guben: Whatever it is as long as you want.

Tranquility: Still miss your baby!I shouldn't think that it's not easy to settle down, let alone not completely settled down.

Gu Ben: You are too realistic!younger brother.

Tranquility: Now that you have a young person who is willing to accompany you, you should cherish it. In a few years, you will be old and unattractive, and it will be difficult to find at that time.If I like you, then I hope you can have someone who really likes you to accompany you.I'm not real enough, not realistic enough.I'm not sure that I can stay with you for a long time.Young people are full of passion, you know how fast this passion burns, and I hope your partner is more than passionate about you, I hope he loves you more.

Gu Ben: You're right, my life has reached a turning point, you just don't understand.The life I want is simple, without asking too much.

Tranquility: I don't think you call it simple now, since you have a BF, you should cherish it. Is it so important to take a look at me?Now that your doll is gone, you are looking for me to amuse you, do you think it is necessary for me to satisfy you?

Gu Ben: All I know is that I want to see you, not as much as you think.There are many things that time can prove, and it is not easy to be sincere.

Ping Ping: Let’s not talk about this.

Gu Ben: Then can you let me take a look at you?Or show you that I'm naked.

Ping Ping: I hope to win the heart of the other party more. The flesh can only satisfy a person for a while, and the heart will last for a long time.

Gu Ben: I just want to see you, I want to know what you are like now, and I don't plan what will happen to you in the future?As for what you want, I have seriously considered it, it is very unrealistic.

Gu Ben: Every time I see you, I just want to eat your tofu, but unfortunately you never satisfy me. If you say this, you will think it is true. Not everyone is negative.

Ping Ping: Before I planned to go to Yunnan, I thought half of it was to play and half to see you.Now without your half I see no point in going there.Don't want to go on, sometimes worrying will affect you.Maybe I'm being self-indulgent!

Gu Ben: I have read all the letters you wrote to me.

Tranquility: I don’t know why, I didn’t know you had a BF at that time, and we can still be friends in the future. Sometimes I need you to guide me on my way, if you still want to.

Gu Ben: I will keep you in my good memory.

Tranquility: let's go!I know that a tree should not be hanged.

Gu Ben: But I hope you, a little tree, can accompany me.

Ping Ping: Still grasp what you have now, there are more illusory things between us.

Gu Ben: I know it's useless to say anything now, I hope I can catch a glimpse of you before I go to sleep, can you?

Ping Ping: I don't need to satisfy you.

Gu Ben: Seeing you, I smile knowingly, and I am happy all day long.

Ping Ping: I don't want you to mess up, no matter who you are serious about, you will be happier.Cherish your baby.

Gu Ben: I know that I like you, and I know that you like me, but it's just because of reality.

The words "obstructed by reality" looked really eye-catching, which chilled Xiang Ping.Xiang Ping was touched by these four words, as if his chest had become a cold storage room, and his heart shivered and shivered from the cold.I have always felt that what is wrong can be summed up in these four words.

Ping Ping: So I wish you what you have now, I don’t want to mess with you, and I don’t want to continue to indulge in illusions, I try to come out, in fact, sometimes I feel that you have never taken me seriously, and now these are not important.

Guben: There is no such thing as going out or not, and you cannot overcome reality.It would be great if people dared to persevere, disregarding the pursuit of what they really want, and waiting for the bad results to make themselves feel better.The road of life is difficult, and the road of comrades is even more difficult.I have said many times that I want you to get married, otherwise you will face a lot of pressure. I have tasted a lot along the way. I don’t want you to be like me. Now you are more and more afraid of loneliness.If someone is sincerely with me, I am willing to satisfy him a lot, including being able to accept his marriage.

Ping Ping: You are the first colleague I have been close to, and it is inevitable to like you.I didn't expect to fall in love so easily.The fact is, it was unrealistic at that time, but it is fine now, thanks to your indifference for making me progress.

Orphan: Some feelings can’t be expressed with my mouth. I’m old, and I’m not as impulsive as you.Feeling is the deepest thing, unwillingness and indulgence.But if I am moved, I will open my heart, suddenly see the light, and truly fall in love, but can you afford it?I don't want to say these things for so long because I don't want to hurt each other, just like you said.

Jingpingping: It takes experience to go from childishness to maturity. I am on the way to you, and one day I will settle down.

Gu Ben: Then you would like to experience it on me?

Ping Ping: Sometimes I think like this foolishly, I am willing to think of your best.

Gu Ben: If this is the case, I think you will never forget it.

Ping Ping: I used to be willing, but now that you have your happiness, it is still inconvenient for me to disturb you.

Orphan: It doesn’t count, it’s not about finding a BF and finding one that really suits you.

Guben: Do we know because of reality?

Jing Ping: Ever since you said you had a BF, I wanted to avoid talking about these topics, but today I can’t help but say it. I don’t think it will affect you, but I’m afraid it will.It is not easy to have someone who is willing to accompany you. After a few years, you will be old and unattractive. Will he still be there?The love of young people is very fierce and burns fast, I hope you can do it yourself.

Gu Ben: I didn't intend to burn with him, because it was just a chance encounter.

Ping Ping: An introduction from a friend is also considered an encounter. How many truths do you have?Why don't you go take a shower and I'll go to bed.

Gu Ben: Can I take a look at you?Watching you fall asleep smiling.

Tranquility: I will wait for you to settle down.What you said is unforgettable, I think I have already had it, and it can’t be solved after one meeting. In too many cases, it will be in my heart, just like a scar. It takes time to erase it, and maybe it can be covered by a new experience.

Gu Ben: It's like when I gave up my high-paying job in Taiwan and came here just for love, but now I can face it.The scars you mentioned are no less than yours. Old scars are nothing but new scars.

Ping Ping: It is because you have been in pain, so now I don’t think you can be hurt by anything. In my eyes, you can control yourself, and I will learn from you.Unlike me, I'm stupid.

Gu Ben: How I wish you could understand me.

Ping Ping: I shouldn't be talking about this today, I foolishly thought I was bothering you.If you can see that the other person really wants you to treat him well, don't make him feel bad.

Guben: Sorry.I'm bothering you.

Ping Ping: It has nothing to do with you.It's an honor to be disturbed by you, and now I think of a word that a gay friend said to me, indifferent.

Xiang Ping didn't understand his intentions, but he knew clearly that he had a BF.In any case, with a clear result today, I feel a lot more relaxed and will not be entangled.Lying on the bed, it was difficult to calm down the strange sense of relaxation, laughing, laughing loudly, laughing at my inexplicable tears, laughing at myself being so tired that I couldn't even lift my arms.Laughed for a long time, laughing while recalling.Laughing that sentence hinders reality.Laughing that he suddenly had a boyfriend, laughing at himself for torturing himself to death for him.

After Xiang Ping went offline, Gu Ben sat alone on the sofa and recalled the past.I took a few more cans of wine and drank while recalling.The nanny cautiously opened the door and poked her head out.

"Drink less bars. If you have any troubles, you don't need to drink. It's already late, so don't work too hard." The nanny said with a sad face.

"I know. You can rest. I will sleep soon." Gu Ben said with a kind smile.

"Well, if you need anything, just call me."

"It's all right. Thank you. Go to sleep."