Dear Chen Jiu

During the final week, I was studying in the school library and my head was heavy.

When I got home, I saw Uncle Shen downstairs in the rental house. This was the first time he found this place without calling me in advance.

"Hello, Uncle Shen."

I said hello.

Uncle Shen nodded and smiled at me, and then opened the rear door directly.

He has driven the car for my uncle for many years, and he is an elder whom I am very close to and trust.

Probably my uncle had something to ask me, so I got into the car without thinking.

But this time the car didn't go to my uncle's house, but made a big detour and stopped at a basement near the university town.

"Why did uncle ask me to come here?" I wondered in my heart.

"This is the house he gave you the key to before."

Oh, it turns out that there is such a high-end residential area nearby. It feels not far from Chen Jiu's rental house, but I didn't expect the decoration of the location to be very different.

"Mayor Yu will come here to see you later. There are meals prepared by auntie on the dinner table. Just wait here."

What kind of day is this? Uncle, where did this come from?

I sent a message to Chen Jiu, telling him that I will come to my uncle's house in the evening, and I will not go home for dinner.

It was about ten o'clock before I heard the sound of the door lock turning.

I stood up from the sofa, walked to the entrance in my cotton slippers, and greeted my uncle with a yawn.

"Sleep when you're tired."

Uncle's tone didn't sound very good.

"No, it's quite close to the house I'm renting. You can drop me back later."

I stretched and stood up a little bit.

"You will live here this month."

Uncle took a pair of new slippers from the shoe cabinet and put them on.

"It's nice where I live now--"

Before I could finish speaking, my uncle took out an envelope from his jacket pocket and threw it on the shoe cabinet.

I subconsciously took the envelope and opened it, and it was full of photos of me and Chen Jiu...

There are those who I accompany Chen Jiu to class, and those who go out together. These are all normal life photos.

The most outrageous one, but last week, Chen Jiu and I had a meal on Silver Valentine's Day...

Who is so bored to take sneak shots?

Uncle can't conclude something based on this alone, can he?Besides, Chen Jiu never said that he wanted to be with me...

I couldn't help being a bit more straightforward, "Uncle, this is my friend, why do you have these photos here?" I forced myself to be calm.

"Friend?" Uncle smiled, took the pile of photos and went straight to the sofa, and threw them on the coffee table.

To be honest, if it wasn't for the inappropriate occasion, I'd really like to ask my uncle for these photos. I don't even have a photo with Chen Jiu in my mobile phone. I didn't expect my uncle to have so many.

"Your parents don't know about this, and I don't intend to let them know. I've applied for a foreign school for you. You can leave at the end of the month."

"impossible."

It's absolutely impossible. Just a few photos that can't prove anything will make me leave Chen Jiu. This is simply a fantasy.

There was a moment of silence in the living room.

"Xiao Zong, if I remember correctly, we met your friend in a restaurant in Qingjiang a few years ago."

That being said, I really remembered that Grandma Chen Jiu was hospitalized at that time, and after Chen Jiu rushed back from Jiangzhou, he invited Lao Xiao and me to have a meal.

"At that time, I thought he looked familiar."

Uncle leaned back on the sofa, his hands relaxed on the back of the sofa.

look familiar?I was wondering, when my uncle asked, "Do you know Mo Qingshu?"

"Mo Qingshu?"

I repeated the name in my mouth, this surname is rare, but I do know a person with the surname Mo...

Teacher Mo, Chen Jiu's biological mother.

"The one you know."

Uncle seemed to be able to see through my thoughts, and without waiting for my answer, he took a sip of the cold tea on the coffee table.

"She is your friend's biological mother," the uncle paused, and then continued, "20 years ago, she followed me when I was still working in Qingjiang."

What's the meaning?What is follow?Uncle has not had a nominal wife and child for so many years.

So... Chen Jiu's real mother is my uncle's... mistress?

Then... Then the child I saw on a rainy day before, could it be the child of my uncle and Chen Jiu's mother?

I leaned on the arm of the sofa in a daze, unable to react for a long time.

According to this statement, Chen Jiu's biological mother was Chen Jiu who was abandoned because of my uncle?

No, not necessarily for affection, probably for power.

No wonder, when I was young and ignorant, I could give birth to Chen Jiu on the spur of the moment for the so-called love. After thinking about it, I can naturally abandon my husband and son for the desire for power.

That's why she was able to make a living in Jiangzhou and become a university teacher.

A cold sweat broke out on my back.

But what does this have to do with me?

Uncle and Chen Jiu's mother are unclear, so why can't I like Chen Jiu?Then Chen Jiu's mother doesn't want him anymore, is it possible that Chen Jiu will still hold me accountable for this irresponsible mother?

No way…

No way!No way?

After I asked myself several times in my heart, I was suddenly not sure about the answer.

can you?Won't.

Really not?I have no idea…

How could I have thought of such an outrageous thing.

Then I swallowed my throat as if to embolden myself, "What does your matter have to do with me? It's between you and it won't affect us."

Uncle seemed to be laughing at my childishness, and let out a chuckle from his nose.

"Xiao Zong, your reaction doesn't look like you are just friends with him."

Uncle put down the ceramic cup, "Of course, it doesn't matter if you don't admit it, even if you really fell in love with that child, I can't make things difficult for you."

"No, we're not in a relationship, he doesn't like me."

Uncle's tone was too sure, as if he knew we had an affair.

So what I can do now is not to involve Chen Jiu, at least not to cause him any trouble because of me.

"So, just go abroad obediently. I can't do anything with you, but can I do anything with that child?" The ceramic cup fell heavily on the glass surface of the coffee table, making a crisp sound, and the water flowed down the cracked cup. The body flows out.

I was so frightened by this sound that I couldn't figure out my thoughts for a while.

"Xiao Zong, even if I didn't have this relationship with Mr. Mo, I wouldn't let you continue to live together."

After finishing speaking, the uncle stood up, took the coat he had just taken off and put it on, "You don't have to go to the school.

You will live here during this time, and there will be aunts who will come to cook for you on time.

I will communicate with your parents, and you can do it yourself. "

Uncle stopped when he reached the entrance, "Sometimes, don't take everything too ideally."

I was thinking about the last sentence my uncle said, and when I realized it, I was the only one left in the room.

I took out my phone, and by the time I realized it, the number had already been dialed.

"Hey, Xiao Zong, why don't you sleep so late."

My mother's tone on the other end of the phone was a little tired, I wonder if she was woken up by me.

"Mom, are you asleep? Then...it's all right."

"Baby, I didn't sleep.

Recently, something happened to your father's company, and I'm helping. "

I wanted to tentatively ask my mother, what would happen if his son liked a man?I think if my biological parents don't mind, even my uncle can't just make decisions for my parents.

He has no right to decide my future life.

"What's wrong? Is something wrong?" My mother's tone became a little worried.

"Mom, do you think I'm free?"

"Why do you ask that, your parents don't give you enough freedom? Did your father and I never ask you to go home to visit us during the holidays, and don't want you to go to college at the door of your house, and just go out with us for a vacation during the winter vacation? If you don’t like it, you still feel that you are not free?”

"Then, if I like someone, am I free?"

"Of course, as long as you don't hurt others, you are free to like whoever you like."

There was a sound of flipping paper from the other end, "Why, the girl you like rejected you?"

Just as I was about to speak, I heard my aunt's voice from the other end, "Madam, Mr. Gu called me and said he wants you to come over now."

It seems that the troubles my dad's company has encountered recently are not small, so I'd better not get uncomfortable at this juncture.

"Mom, then you and my dad can get busy first, I'm fine."

***

It was almost 12 o'clock in the evening when I returned to the rental house, I was a little absent-minded, and got into my bed after taking a shower.

Chen Jiu was still reading with the bedside lamp on, and I grabbed his hand.

"Chen Jiu, I annoy you so much, do you hate me?" After finishing speaking, I stared up at his face, trying to capture all the subtle changes.

His hand that was about to turn the page paused.

Before he could answer, I sat on his lap wrapped in a thick woolen quilt, "I mean, the annoying kind.

Probably not, I just talked too much. "

"Just know."

He looked up at me.

"Can I kiss you?"

His eyelids moved slightly, I moved closer to his lips, and pressed them lightly, the room was so quiet that we could hear each other's heartbeat and breathing.

"Good night, Chen Jiu."

I pressed against his forehead and said in a low voice but seriously.

"Good night."

He closed the book in hand, leaned against the pillow and looked at me.

***

During that time, I would secretly go out with Chen Jiu. I used to step on his time to go to school with him, but now that the school is closed at the end of the semester, I listened to him every day.

Once he showed signs of going out, I sounded the alarm to cheer up and followed him secretly.

I don't know if my uncle will really do something to him, I think it shouldn't, but I can't take things related to Chen Jiu lightly.

But let me tell you that Chen Jiu's life is really boring. During the final week, he either goes to school or makes an appointment with the client to deliver the manuscript, or he spends a lot of time learning a lot on the way to the bookstore. I can't see it. understand things.

After finishing the last major test, I stopped by the vegetable market to buy a la carte to welcome the upcoming summer vacation.

But when the clock pointed to 09:30, Chen Jiu hadn't come back yet, so I had a bad feeling in my heart.

The end of the month is the time when my uncle asked me to go abroad, but as long as I don't leave, he can't help it, but today I have a final exam... Maybe he just took this time to find Chen Jiu?

I was fidgeting at the dining table. I listened to the movement of every resident going up and down the corridor throughout the night. There were those who were scolded by their mother after kicking the ball home, there were young couples who were swaying in love, and there was an old couple supporting them. go upstairs...

It wasn't until I heard familiar footsteps coming from the corridor that I hurriedly got up to open the door.

This time I stood up and realized that I had waited from dawn to dark, and I even forgot to turn on the light in the living room.

I opened the door and turned on the light. Chen Jiu stood at the door holding the key.

"Why did you come back?" Fortunately, nothing happened, but the moment I spoke, my voice trembled involuntarily.

Chen Jiu raised his eyes to look at me, but that one look made me involuntarily afraid.

"What's wrong?" I pretended to be calm and took a step back to let him into the room.

Chen Jiu didn't change his shoes but went straight to the sofa, and then I heard him say, "Talk."

"Talk about... talk about what?" If it's not about falling in love with me, it's better not to talk about anything now, I feel that talking about other things may not be what I want to hear.

"Talk, you move out of here."

As he spoke, Chen Jiu took out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket, took out one and lit it, took a few deep breaths, then held it between his fingertips, let the ash burn and fell onto the white floor tiles unbearably.

Sure enough, Uncle came looking for him.

"I'm not moving away."

I am determined.

When Chen Jiu raised his hand again to bring the cigarette to his mouth, I saw the ash falling on the back of his hand, and I subconsciously wanted to pat it off.

As a result, Chen Jiu quickly wiped it out with his fingertips as if he had expected it, and then threw it into the ashtray beside him.

"Does it hurt?" I took a few steps forward to grab his hand and take a look.

"Don't touch."

Chen Jiu said hoarsely.

His cold attitude made me uneasy, and I sat next to him, "Is it... my uncle is looking for you? What did he say? I won't let him bother you in the future.

But I won't leave, I finally got into Jiangzhou to live with you, I won't leave. "

I repeated incoherently, and apologized if I made a mistake, anyway, no one would try to drive me away.

"Jiangzhou for me?" Chen Jiu looked down at the soot on the ground.

"Do not."

I subconsciously deny it.

"Repeat it for me?"

I still shook my head, as if I was afraid that he would not believe me, and I explained, "The university I am going to now is very good. I like Jiangzhou, this university, and the current environment."

"Yes," he stood up, "but I'm annoying."

This is the first time in five years that I have heard such straightforward expressions of likes and dislikes from him.

"I won't trouble you."

"You have brought it."

I took his hand and tried to explain something, but everything seemed pale.

"I'm not trouble."

I repeated.

"During this time, apart from you, there are people from your uncle who have been following me."

Chen Jiu said calmly.

It turned out that I followed him during this time, and he knew it all.

"I'm sorry, I was afraid Uncle would—"

"so."

"I can guarantee that he will not come to you again in the future."

I don't know if my uncle told him about Mo Qingshu, but I don't think there's any need to hide the matter now, "I, uncle, I'm sorry about your mother--"

"My mother?" He interrupted me, "Don't be too sentimental, I bother you only because of you."

"I do not believe."

I stood behind him and put my arms around his waist, "You are just angry, you can't accept it, I can not bother you for a while, but you can't drive me away."

This hug was very long. I pressed against his back, buried my face in his neck, and smelled the faint smell of tobacco on his body.

When he spoke again, it seemed a century had passed.

"Gu Zong," his voice was low and hoarse, even the words of refusal were somewhat bewitching, "You take yourself too seriously."

He broke my hand, "Did I say, do I need you?"

"That woman doesn't want you anymore, why did you drive me away because of her?" I held back my tears and said nothing, Chen Jiu's reaction was not what I expected at all, how could I have thought that this matter would have a negative effect on me? Our relationship makes such a big difference.

"Move from here tomorrow."

He didn't answer my question, but took a few steps forward as if he wanted to leave.

"Are we still friends in the future?" Even if it's okay to go back to the previous relationship, at least don't keep in touch with each other, I really can't accept it.

"If you or Xiao Wenxi need..."

I wonder why in his eyes I was classified as the same as Lao Xiao, we are clearly...obviously we have a relationship of eating, living, and sleeping together.

His connivance has always made me fall into hallucinations. Now that I think about it, he never gave me any promises. All the intimacy was provoked by me. It turned out that it was so easy for him to break up with me.

"In your eyes, am I just a friend like Lao Xiao?"

"In my senior year next year, I will leave Jiangzhou to look for an internship. The rent of the house is until the end of the month."

Chen Jiu sighed after finishing speaking, "How much more clearly do you have to say?"

When he said these words, he never looked back at me from the beginning to the end.

"Am I just a friend?"

He seemed to be annoyed by my question at last, turned around and stared at me with bloodshot eyes, "I've answered this question before."

How could I not remember what he said.

Five years ago, I asked a similar question in Resplendent, when he said, I can't be friends with you.

So, after so many years, are we not even friends?

It never occurred to me that no matter how bad Mo Qingshu was, he was his own mother, so why would I not be involved in this debt.

"So, you won't contact me again, will you?" I asked desperately.

Chen Jiu turned around and took the house key, and left without looking back.

I just sat numbly in the living room all night.

Halfway through, the phone rang several times intermittently, but I knew it was not from Chen Jiu, so I set the phone ringtone specially for him.

I don't want to answer calls from anyone but him, and I suddenly feel powerless about the world.

I went to the kitchen and got a bottle of white wine. It turns out that when people are in a low mood, drinking can't relieve their emotions.

It can only stimulate your nerves, making you seem to be getting more and more awake, and my persistence has completely collapsed at that moment.

If a guy just doesn't like you, you can work on it.

But if it gets to the point of being disgusting, what is the meaning of my existence?

I woke up on the back of the sofa in the morning feeling sore and smelling of alcohol.

The phone was dead, and I got up to charge the phone, feeling all the bones in my body creaking.

A lot of message reminders popped up on the mobile phone, all of which were from Lao Xiao.

I hurriedly called back. This was the first time Lao Xiao took the initiative to contact me after Lu Yuan's accident.

It took me several calls to get through.

Lao Xiao's condition sounded very bad, and my depressed mood was even more uneasy.

"What's the matter?" I asked him, only to realize that my voice was hoarse when I opened my mouth.

"It's okay," Lao Xiao's tone was weak, "How is Chen Jiu now?"

"What happened to him?" I asked nervously.

"Are you not at home?" Old Xiao's tone finally wavered.

"No, he didn't come home, so what happened?" I pressed.

"I went to find the black car driver last night, but no one answered your phone call, so I called Chen Jiu..." Lao Xiao took a deep breath on the other end of the phone, and then let out a long breath, "I... It was too heavy, so Chen Jiu stopped him at the end...he was injured on the head, I accompanied him in the hospital and he left after stitches, why hasn't he come home yet?"

Lao Xiao's current state sounds very bad, I didn't plan to talk about me and Chen Jiu, but I am very worried about them now, and where did Chen Jiu go if he didn't come back?

"Is Chen Jiu seriously injured? How are you?" I asked eagerly.

"Lu Yuan is dead."

After Lao Xiao exhausted his words, he hung up.