[Xie Do Chanbaek obeys] Exchanging tenderness

I don't know how to explain it to you, can't I just not mind? "

"I don't mind anything, meeting in such a mess, is that the 'lover' Xie Daochan wants?"

Bai Shou remembered Wu Hela's words.It's a little different, Xie Daocan has never listened to him so seriously before.Those eyes were deep, as if trying to memorize every word.

The more this happened, the more Bai Shou believed that something must have happened to him in the past two years, and the more Xie Daocan concealed it, the more uneasy he became.

Bai Shou said, during the two years when Xie Daocan was away, every day was a war for me.Thinking of you, like your father, buried alone in a place where no one knows and can’t hear you, thinking of you, like my father, lying in the hospital unable to move, no one to speak, no one to take care of you manage.For me, you are living peacefully in a certain corner of the world, but you just don’t remember to come back, that is the greatest kindness of God.

"Can't you give me that kind of kindness?" Bai Zun said.

"But I remember you." Xie Daocan replied like a pleading.

He didn't continue to stop him.

Bai Zun did not stop.

"You don't like me anymore." He heard Xie Daocan say behind him, "If you say that, I won't come to you."

Bai Shou didn't look back, as if he didn't want him to hear: "I like mine, you don't need to show up."

Xie Daocan hugged him from behind.

☆,—26—

That was the first time Xie Daocan expressed his physical dependence so clearly.

He planted a long kiss on the back of Bai Zun's neck, sniffing at the breath of his collar like a kitten, his arms strangling him a little out of breath.

Bai Shou broke away from him, stepped out of the ginkgo forest, and caught a bus, and got on without even checking the route.

That kiss was always there, burning and hurting, as if alive.

All night, Bai Shou curled up on the bed without turning over, his cold fingertips pressed the place where the man kissed to calm him down.

The window was faintly white, and he finally admitted to himself that he also had that kind of dependence, as if being hugged by Xie Daocan, the heart that had been hanging for two years really fell back to its place.

After I realized it, my mind became much lighter, and the sleepiness came up, and with warmth, I re-arranged the meeting in the ginkgo forest between dreams and dreams.

He thought, he was still too stingy, next time, at least don't turn his back on him.

Xie Daochan disappeared for more than a week.

During the lunch break on Thursday, Wu Hela wandered into the reference room, leaned against the door, and said to Bai Zunshou, "Deputy Chief Liang is going to have dinner with our department on weekends. I recommended the fried chicken restaurant opened by my mother."

The person buried in the book only hummed.

"Tell Xie Daocan that he will go."

Bai Zun raised his head.

"Senior, Fighting!"

Wu Hela clenched her fist before turning around, but Bai Zunshou stopped her.

"Have you seen him?"

Wu Hela was a little proud and shook the phone.

Bai Shou wanted to ask something, but finally didn't ask.

"I won't tell the seniors the phone number. You can ask yourself when you meet tomorrow."

Wu Hela stuck out her tongue and ran away.

On the night of the dinner party, Vice-Chairman Liang answered his wife's phone call at 08:30 as usual and left.

The ones left around the long table truth or dare.

Xie Daochan did not show up.

The mother dragged Wu He to the back kitchen and muttered in a low voice, saying that after staring at him all night, the child ate too little, maybe the dishes made by the mother were not to the taste, but luckily the soup was made early in the morning.While talking, she filled a bowl of soup and asked Prosecutor Bai to bring it over. Wu Hela took the bowl in her hand, and her mother put a few slices of pork belly into the bowl.

Bai Shou sat at a corner of the shop, facing the window looking at the street scene.

There seemed to be a busker across the street, surrounded by a group of young people, the sound of guitars and the screams of onlookers could be heard from time to time.The shop was noisy, and the street was also noisy, so I couldn't hear what was being sung.

When Wu Hela watched over Bai Zun and finished the soup, the people at the table were all drunk, and the people on the street were scattered, and the night finally calmed down.

The onlookers dispersed, the guitar was still being played, the song was still being sung, and the man was singing——

Why do birds suddenly appear

Everytime you are around

Just like me, they long to be

Closeto you.

Why do stars fall down from the sky

Everytime you walk by

Just like me, they long to be

Closeto you.

While plucking the strings, the singer raised his head and gave Bai Zun a meaningful smile.

Bai Shou glanced at Wu Hela, and she blinked innocently.

He never knew that Xie Daocan could play the guitar and sing very well. How many things did he not know?

Bai Zun was thinking about it, when he suddenly heard "Brother Dao Can" called from over there.

A good-looking girl stood in front of that person and wiped her tears, as if she had quarreled and came to make up.

Xie Daocan still played and sang alone, the girl simply sat on the side of the street, holding his arm, next to his shoulder, listening to the song.

Wu Hela didn't expect it to be so complicated, so she ran back to the back kitchen while her mother told her to wash the dishes.

There was no movement in the shop, Xie Daocan winked, the girl nodded, smiled at him covertly, stood up, and walked away step by step, wiping away tears.

The song changed three or four songs, and Bai Zhou listened quietly.

Suddenly, the singing and the guitar stopped.

Bai Shou looked over and saw a young man from a rich family, accompanied by a butler, arrogantly, as if throwing a check into the violin case at Xie Daocan's feet.

Xie Daocan raised his head and looked at the person who threw the check.

After a stalemate for a while, the butler laughed: "Our young master just likes your music too much."

"It's not for you." Xie Daocan said.

The owner of the check was condescending and grabbed his chin.

"It's fine to sing, or anything else, just stay with me for a night, and you can write the number on the check as you like."

Xie Daochan smiled.

"Is it great to be rich?"

The man also laughed, and the strength in his hands became a little heavier.

Another hand grabbed the hand and pulled it away.

Bai Shou leaned over, picked up the check in the piano case, and returned it to him.

"Let's go like this."

The man froze for a moment, and looked at the two people who looked similar.

"none of your business?"

Bai Shoufu flashed his civil service card.

"Artists need to apply for a license to perform on the street, and they can only perform in a limited area after approval. Now it is an illegal transaction. Do you want me to talk to your lawyer?"

Before anyone could respond, Bai Shou took Xie Daocan's guitar and put it away, closed the case, held it with one hand, and grabbed Xie Daocan with the other. Xie Daocan stood still, Bai Shou did not force himself, and walked to the end of the street.

Xie Daocan glanced at the "Rich Young Master" just now, and the man covered his hands under his cuffs and gave him an OK gesture.

"Is Prosecutor Bai abusing his power? Didn't you say that what you like has nothing to do with me? Does it have anything to do with who I trade with illegally?"

Xie Daocan strode after him.

"If you look like you, you have jurisdiction?" He grabbed Bai Zun's wrist, "Where is the jurisdiction of your criminal department No. [-], do you want to stamp it?"

Bai Zun wanted to break free and fight back, but he couldn't get angry after hearing such nonsense words.

"Let me get back to my own track, where is Xie Daochan? When will Xie Daochan's life start?"

"I think so too, but I'm not you." Xie Daocan said, "You can still be a dignified prosecutor without Xie Daocan. I didn't obey in vain, and I couldn't start anything."

This was a sentence that Bai Zun couldn't do anything about, he didn't say anything, he pulled Xie Daocan around the corner, and stopped a taxi by the side of the road.

He stuffed Xie Daocan into the car and gave the driver a full bill.

The driver asked where to go, Xie Daocan said Santa Maria Hospital.

When the trunk was raised, Bai Zun's hand resting on the guitar paused for a moment.

The driver said it was too far away and it was too late to go.

The two of them held a guitar, stood side by side under the street lamp, and sent the taxi away.

They took the last bus, the one back to Bai Shou's house.

Xie Daocan dozed off, the bus swayed and bumped into the heads of the people around him.

Quietly opening one eye, the guitar between them moved to the window.

He took the bus to turn right and leaned on Bai Zun's shoulder.

Bai Zun did not object.

Even with his eyes closed, Xie Daocan knew that the man's hand was very close.

He reached over and touched the man's fingertips.

He didn't object to wrapping his fingertips around him.

Xie Daocan still didn't open his eyes, smiled, his fingers slipped into Bai Zun's fingers, and his fingers gradually clenched.

The light in the entrance was on, Bai Shou put the guitar away, squatted down, found a pair of spare slippers, and threw them to the people who followed him in.

It's like picking up a stray cat and bringing it home.

But the cat was too quiet, which made him feel inexplicably anxious.

"Is there no other place to live besides Santa Maria Hospital?"

he turned to him and asked.A hug was his answer.

Xie Daocan rushed forward, kissed his lips, and pressed him against the wall of the entrance.

☆,—27—

This kiss is different from before.Bai Xun thought vaguely.

If it was a kitten before, then it must be a big cat kissing him at this moment.

Xie Daocan trapped Bai Zun in the fabric like a prey, as if he wanted every inch of him to be stained with his breath and smell.

Knowing this person for so many years, it was the first time that Bai Zunshi felt overwhelmed.

He dealt with the kiss, with his forearm blocking the approaching body, desperately leaving a gap of calm for himself.

The kiss seemed to be growing, spreading from Bai Zun's lips to the neck, holding his artery and climbing to the bone.

The uniform jacket fell down, the shirt buttons were unbuttoned one by one, the palms were inserted into the front of the clothes, hot as his kiss, and pressed against the back, the thumbs were counted down one by one along the side of the ribs, and wrapped around the waist for rubbing Hold on, reluctant to leave.

Bai Shou knew that this night was coming, and he couldn't stop it.

The hand found the buckle on his belt, and he grasped it with little strength.

The movement stopped, the kiss was still leaning on his ear, burning him every breath.

"You promise me..." Bai Shou turned his face to the side and looked at Xie Daocan, his voice was very soft.

Xie Daocan was panting, his eyes were clear, pure and serious, and he looked into the depths of Bai Zun's eyes.

"Okay, everything is guaranteed."

Bai Zun didn't put any conditions.At that moment, he vaguely understood that he could treat this person unconditionally.

"Forget it, it's useless for someone like you to guarantee it."

Xie Daocan smiled, and jumped up like a kitten, licked Bai Zun's earlobe, and whispered, "You still understand me."

He continued the unfinished action, and it went too far.

"Rogue..." Bai Zun said.

However, it is not a protest.

"I'm sorry. Prosecutor Bai." As he spoke, Xie Daocan picked up Bai Xun's knees and carried it over his shoulders.

The bedside lamp was too bright, Xie Daocan took off his T-shirt and threw it lightly, it hung on the lamp head, leaving only a hazy light.

Bai Zun slowly moved his hands covering his eyes.

He saw the big cat hopped onto the bed without a sound, and climbed onto him on its hands and knees, as calmly as if it was enjoying a feast.

One by one, Xie Daocan peeled off the body that was wrapped, the prosecutor, the model student, rationality, restraint, rules, propriety, everything that blocked them, and replaced them with kisses and touches.

He dwells in all that is He, opens all to Him.

Many senses have disappeared, only the lips remember the kiss, and the fingers remember the wetness of the tight clasp.

And the place occupied by this person became extremely clear and long every minute and every second. Bai Zun seemed to know the joys and sorrows of Xie Daocan's life at once. He couldn't tell whether it was his or his own, but he was in every He seems to be able to understand and answer the questions buried in each collision of each kiss.

At the last moment of that night, the two spent slowly and soberly, stubbornly and in vain, trying to store the person who understood them so well in the body's memory for a long time.

Xie Daocan took a shower, wrapped himself in a towel, walked to the blinds and looked around, it was just dawn.

The person on the bed turned over, as if woken up.

Xie Daocan uncovered a corner of the quilt, got into the bed on his side, and deliberately squeezed him.

Bai Shou raised his eyes, spread the quilt for him, and said half asleep that there were clean shorts and socks in the third drawer of the closet. After being confused for a while, he said again, T-shirts and jeans should also be changed , the first drawer has a new one brought by my mother.

Xie Daocan leaned over and pecked him on the lips.

Bai Zun was tired, wrapped his arms around his neck, and earnestly exchanged a good morning kiss.

The palm of his hand was hot, Xie Daocan touched his forehead with his forehead, only then did he know that he had a fever.

He got out of bed, changed into clean clothes as he said, poured a glass of water, sat by the bed to feed him, and asked where the medicine was.

Bai Zun said no.

Xie Daocan put his arms around his waist, kissed his ear and said to accompany you to take a hot bath.

Bai Zun lowered his head, smiled and said, go out and wait for me for a while.

Xie Daocan thought about this sentence for a while, and said, "It's not the first time, are you so embarrassed?"

Bai Zun did not answer.

Before stepping out of the bedroom, Xie Daocan turned his head.

"What's for breakfast? I'll prepare it."

After waiting for a while, the person on the bed replied: "It's all good."

The bedroom door was lightly closed, and Bai Zun was fully awake.

What did he just say?Did you hear me wrong?Didn't you wake up?

Xie Daocan opened the refrigerator, and there were enough ingredients.Maybe it's because Mom came to check it out not long ago.

He toasted two slices of bread, fried two slices of ham, and two poached eggs. He divided the boiled oatmeal into two bowls and put them on the table. After looking at them, he cut up another orange.Finally sat down at the table, looked out into the bedroom and waited.

Seeing the breakfast, Bai Shou hesitated for a moment, turned around and went to the locker to open a small jar of honey, sat opposite Xie Daocan, spread the bread, and pushed the plate in front of him.

This breakfast is boring.

Xie Daocan thought that it was probably because Bai Shou was sick and had no energy to talk to him.However, this morning was different from usual. It was possible that he was angry because he was too reckless last night.

With a poached egg in his mouth, he couldn't help raising his head.

Bai Shou kept staring at him, and the breakfast in front of him hardly moved.

"What's wrong?" Xie Daocan asked.

"I should be asking you this sentence." Bai Zun said.

Xie Daocan was very calm, he knew in his heart that he still couldn't get away with it.

Bai Shoushi swallowed a few mouthfuls of oatmeal without taste, and gave him a moment, but he didn't explain anything.

"Xie Daocan has no mother since he was a child, and he seldom eats home-cooked meals. I remember you told me that when you lived alone, you had instant noodles for three meals a day, and you helped the aunt in the small shop at the alley to wash the dishes for two days on weekends. You can have a meal of soup and rice. After we are together, the ordinary bibimbap from the school cafeteria will not bother you every meal. You don’t eat Western-style breakfast, you say you don’t feel like home, and you don’t eat toast Sweet ones, eat them with kimchi or hot sauce. Also, you are a picky eater and don’t eat egg yolks.”

Bai Zun said slowly while staring at the person opposite him intently.

Xie Daochan, what happened in the past two years?Do you remember who I am?

☆,—28—

"Hello, Prosecutor Bai. I'm Xie Daocan. I'm glad to meet you... 530 two days."

It is an honorific.

Xie Daocan stood up and stretched out his right hand to Bai Zun.

Bai Zun did not shake that hand.

He kind of understood what was different about this person from before.

I want to be the old Xie Daocan, but I don't know what "Xie Daocan" used to be like.

Xie Daocan sat back and couldn't talk about it for a while.

The silence lasted for a few minutes, and Bai Zun waited patiently.

"It seems that I slept for a long time and woke up lying in a strange place. The people who saved me were those three last night, the nurse Eun-ji from St. Mary's Hospital, the gambler Uncle Bong, and the hacker Ren-tae. You have all seen them. "

Bai Zun's eyes were as calm as lake water, Xie Daocan was afraid of seeing the lake water being sad, so he couldn't keep looking at it.

"Uncle Feng and Ren Tai said that they knew me before, and told me the name Xie Daocan and the code name 'four', but I don't remember it at all." He lowered his head and gently stirred half a bowl of oatmeal and said , "The gunshot wounds on the shoulder and leg didn't hurt when I woke up. The doctor said there was no traumatic brain injury, and it didn't look like a mental trauma. The reason for this may be the effect of drugs."

Based on professional instinct, Bai Zunshi noticed something unusual.

"Where did they find you?"

"Outskirts, in the mountains." Xie Daocan raised his head. He thought that perhaps these clues would be useful to Bai Shou. "Later, I got to know you and knew that the neighborhood was the suburban clubhouse of the Nanshan Group that you investigated."

At this moment, Bai Shou finally had to face the fact that Xie Daocan really didn't remember anything.

"How did you know me?" It was a bit difficult, but he still asked this question.

"After waking up, about a week later, I remembered some childhood fragments and a name, which is Bai Zun."

"So you investigate me, follow me, and just refuse to come to see me?"

Another unspeakable uneasy silence.

"You were so sad during that time, I guessed our relationship." Xie Daochan hesitated and said, "Would you be happy if a lover who doesn't remember you came back alive?"

"I will." Bai Zun did not hesitate.

Xie Daocan looked at him with a smile, and asked him: "Aren't you sad now?"

Bai Zunshi looked away, refusing to let him catch him.At this time, he didn't know how he felt in his heart. He thought it was not sad, but just angry.

"If nothing happened to me that day, you would have been looking at me like this? If you don't ask, when are you going to tell me?"

"I'm not looking at you all the time, but I'm always thinking about when and what kind of me I can stand in front of you."

Xie Daocan paused, as if he had made up his mind.

"Bai Zun, I like you."

He said that he didn't remember what Xie Daocan, who liked Bai Zun, was like, but he seemed to like you again, so what he was like before is not so important.

Bai Shou knew what a good sentence this was.Like a homeless kitten who wants to give him the only small dried fish hanging around his neck, but his heart is full of his kitten who ran away from home and has no more. The place took him in.

He said thank you Daochan, you liar.With a kind of impotent peace of mind.

Neither of them said another word.

Woo Ha-ra's call saved them all.

According to the phone call, the suspect retracted his confession and committed suicide in the teaching center, and the suicide note implied that the prosecutor tortured the confession.

Bai Zun put down the phone, took his coat and went out.

Before closing the door, he turned his head, Xie Daocan's eyes seemed to be waiting for him to come back.

The door closed wordlessly, and he gave him no answer.

It was a sunny day, but the wind was strong, the windows were closed, and the wind could still be heard.

Wu Hela called again, saying that Deputy Chief Liang had gone to the Supreme Prosecutor's Office to answer, and there were reporters downstairs, so seniors must not show up.

After a while, Deputy Chief Liang also called over and said to listen to me, write a book about the whole story, hold a press conference, and put the case aside. I have been here for so many years and have encountered many times. This kind of thing is obviously We have been designed, the more true we are, the more disadvantaged we will be.

Why is Bai Shou saying that it is not true, and people say that we tortured to extract a confession, why don't we do an autopsy?Do you need to compare the handwriting of the suicide note?Don't watch the surveillance video of the teaching center?

Deputy Chief Liang was very angry. He said that you should calm down and talk to me again.

The phone hung up.Bai Shou knew that he was right and that he had lost control.

He was very upset.He thought that Xie Daocan's memory loss must not be an accident. He had a close relationship with the Qin family in the Nanshan Group, and someone was afraid that he would reveal the secret and used medicine on him.Is it Qin?Or some important person who has not yet surfaced?

He thought that by thinking this way, he would not be sad about his own affairs.

But the wind that day was really strong, and it couldn't stop it from blowing everything away. The days and nights that he guarded somewhere in his heart, which were so unforgettable because of the existence of that person, were all lost at once.

☆,—29—

People were killed in teaching institutes, and the cases that were almost revealed were all returned to zero.

According to Deputy Director Liang, write the whole story, hold a press conference, and deal with the inquiries and hearings of the Supreme Prosecutor's Office, while investigating the hidden story behind the "retraction of the confession and suicide". Duty dormitory.

After returning to the apartment, I only hurriedly changed a few clothes without staying.

The final opinion of the Supreme Prosecutor's Office was that the evidence was insufficient and no punishment should be given.

It was Sunday, Deputy Chief Liang breathed a sigh of relief, and called all the colleagues who were still on duty to eat at the food stall.

Bai Shou went back home to accompany his father.

My father is still sick, and his spirit has improved a lot. During the day, he tutors law students in their papers, and in the evening, he can hold his mother's arm and take a walk downstairs.

My mother often talks about it recently, saying that my father is becoming more and more like a child.

As soon as Bai Shou came back, his mother made miso soup and red bean rice, and his father's dinner was a bowl of porridge and five side dishes as usual.

Mother put two dinners on a small case, sent them to the study, and set them up in front of the couch.

Bai Shou sat on the side of the couch, holding white porridge, put a chopstick on the porridge like a side dish, blew it to cool, and held it to his father.

Father took the bowl in his hand, leaned over to look at the miso soup on the small case, and looked at the half-open door.

"Can't I taste yours?"

Bai Shou suppressed a smile, picked up the spoon in his father's bowl, filled a spoonful of red bean rice, put a piece of tofu and a piece of meat on top, and fed it to his father's mouth.

Father had a good meal and stopped asking about the case.

"I heard from He La that our Dao Chan is back, when will you come to see me?"

Bai Shou tasted a sip of the soup very carefully, without raising his eyes, he said slowly, "Isn't it the same as me, what's so interesting about it."

The father only thought that he was jealous, and said with a smile: "How can parents think that there are too many children?"

Mother cooked a soft-boiled egg, and the father and son each had half of it, and put it in a small dish.

"Look at him."

She complained to her son and scolded her father.

"If someone comes to see you once, will he become your son?"

The father took away half of the soft-boiled eggs disapprovingly.

"Isn't it mine?"

Mother smiled helplessly.

"You can't be so greedy."

As soon as the mother went out, the father slowly swallowed a few mouthfuls of porridge and asked his son in a low voice, "Am I greedy?"

Bai Zun looked into his father's eyes, unable to read the deep meaning in the clearness, so he could only shake his head at him.

Before going to bed, Bai Shou leaned against the head of the bed and flipped through his phone.

On the day he left Xie Daocan alone in the apartment, at night, Xie Daocan sent a message.

"I was a little worried, so I went to see you. When I came back, I remembered that I didn't know the access code of my house, so I went back to the hospital first."

Bai Zun did not reply, and later, Xie Daocan did not contact him either.

At that time, he was sad, and every word of it was sad, but now he felt distressed after reading each word.

He wanted to keep this phone number, but he didn't know what name to write, so he hesitated for a while, and then put it down.

A few days later, this number called.

"Is work over? Can I pick you up?"

Bai Shou looked up at the wall clock, it was almost ten o'clock at night.

There is no task that must be completed, he just doesn't want to go back to the apartment, and one person resists the breath left by the other.

However, hearing that person's voice, Bai Shou realized that he was not so sad.

"It's not over yet."

He misses him a little bit, but doesn't know how to face him.

"I'm almost there, waiting for you downstairs."

Bai Zun didn't make him wait too long.

It was frosty and very cold. When we met, Xie Daocan's nose was red from the cold, and he was covering the skirt of his windbreaker with one hand, warming a portion of oden.

The cup of Kanto cooking was still hot in Bai Shun's hands.

Bai Shou found a quail egg, a piece of shiitake mushroom, and a piece of well-cooked radish, put them on a small wooden stick, and handed them to Xie Daocan.

Xie Daocan took a bite of the radish and tasted it seriously.

"Carrots, shiitake mushrooms and quail eggs, what I used to like to eat?"

Bai Zun shook his head.

"It's what I like to eat."

The two were holding a cup together, and they were very close. Xie Daocan stopped chewing and looked at Bai Zun. When the man raised his eyes, he stopped looking at him and glanced at the fish balls in the cup.

"Can't you give me that?"

like a child.Bai Shou suddenly understood how his mother was complaining about his father.

"That's mine."

Before it was time for the last bus, the two of them went for a walk on the nearby bridge.

There were fewer pedestrians and vehicles, and the bridge was quiet, only the river breeze was blowing.

The two walked side by side.

He watched Bai Zun silently in the dark for more than a year, and Xie Daocan knew that he didn't drink alcohol, didn't lose his temper, and didn't tell anyone when he was sad, just walked on this bridge.

Xie Daocan looked at the man's hand hanging by his side, and wanted to hold it, but in the end he didn't.

He just obeyed, let me say three sorrys to you.

☆,—30—

The fragments that Xie Daocan has recalled so far are all by himself, with no family or friends. The doctor said that if he can remember Bai Zun, it may be that he has been thinking about this name when his memory is erased.

He didn't say that to Bai Zun.

He said that it seemed as if he woke up one day and found himself floating in the sea, the surroundings were very calm, the same sea water, and it was impossible to tell the difference between the south, the north, the south, and suddenly he saw a small island.

"My little island."

The two leaned on the bridge railing, Xie Daocan looked at Bai Zun.

He said sorry, the reason he likes you is that he feels sad when he sees you, as sad as looking at a home that he can't go back to.This kind of sadness makes me feel that we are not growing like weeds in this world.

He said, this kind of liking is a bit selfish, because you have my past there, maybe, you are my past.

Bai Shou looked at the river in the night and listened quietly.

Xie Daochan said I'm sorry, I can't like you like that person before.

Investigate you, follow you, but don't come to see you, because I don't want to stand in front of you empty-handed, saying that I am your former lover, and I don't want you to look at me because of that person's love, I want to be you now lovers.

This self-contradictory guy was so reluctant to let go, but at the same time wanted to distance himself from his former self, Bai Zun raised the corners of his lips, and Xie Daocan didn't see it.

"What's another sorry?"

Xie Daochan hesitated for a while.

"Can I ask a question?"

Bai Shou looked at him.

"That night..." Xie Daocan thought for a while, and then asked directly, "Is this... the first time for us?"

Bai Zun was silent, but he didn't look away.

Finally he said, "Is it important?"

Xie Daochan had the answer in his heart.

"I took it for granted. My heart was always up and down. I was afraid that I was not good enough and wronged you. I didn't expect that in the end... I still wronged you."

"I'm not wronged."

"But I didn't expect that I used to be so...not proactive. How did I have been lover with you for so long..."

Bai Shou could no longer listen to that person's bad words, and Xie Daocan himself couldn't do anything either.

"Don't say it."

He brushed one hand over the bridge railing and walked slowly back.

Xie Daocan followed.

"I mean, if you haven't started, you shouldn't have started so hastily."

The two walked for a while, Xie Daocan thought that Bai Zun would not answer.

"It started a long time ago." Bai Zun stopped, "Is it the beginning when there is a physical relationship?"

Xie Daocan froze for a moment, it seemed like a promise.

"Perhaps it should be said, start over."

"It's not over, so it's not starting over, it's just continuing."

The two faced each other, and the river wind passed between them, blowing that sentence away.It's not true, but Xie Daocan clearly heard that what Bai Zun said was true, continue.

He wants to kiss him.

Bai Zunshi avoided it, and as compensation, he hugged him.

"Thank you Daochan, welcome back."

He said this sentence that had been buried in his heart for two years, and he never dared to expect to be able to say it.

That night, Xie Daocan sent Bai Shou to the elevator of the apartment.

The elevator door closed, the number went up, he turned around and looked, the world was so empty, the wind was so strong, and the night was so long, he leaned against the wall next to him, slid down slowly, and sat cross-legged on the floor.

He has nowhere to go but to get through the night, waiting for his only island to wake up, his only morning to come.

The elevator stopped on the fifteenth floor, in absolute stillness, Bai Shou stood for a while, and pressed another floor.

The elevator door opened, and Bai Shou pulled Xie Daocan up and led him home.

Bai Zunshou said that the access code is your birthday.

Xie Daocan only pressed an "eight" and stopped, he didn't remember.

Bai Shou didn't say anything, and he pressed the remaining five numbers for him to see one by one.

That night, Xie Daocan lay in Bai Shou's arms and fell asleep listening to his heartbeat.Like a newborn baby in this world.

Bai Zun answered all his sorry.

He said, the man I know named Xie Daocan has lived for more than 20 years and spent most of his time repaying the debts owed by his father.I don't remember, but I feel better.

It's a pity that I don't remember, but if Xie Daochan can forget that past, I won't regret it.

☆,—31—

Bai Shou heard the sound of Xie Daocan jumping out of bed and stepping lightly across the floor.

He looked at the shutters. It was still early in the day.

That person slept on his shoulder all night, half of his body was numb, and he couldn't move for a while, so he simply hid under the blanket again.

The door of the bathroom was closed slightly, and there was a sound of water, as if it was summer outside the window, and a distant heavy rain was falling.

Good morning, good night, home, life, these words that I didn't pay much attention to, fell into the dream one by one.

I need to prepare something, Bai Shou thought vaguely, this is not a place to live.

He is not very good at housework, so tidying is slow.

Starting from the porch, put an extra pair of slippers, because I don’t know how to choose a style, so I picked a pair similar to my own and bought them back.

The cups, plates, chopsticks, and toiletries should also be added to that person.

Half of the closet was freed up, and according to the style that person liked before, sweaters, T-shirts, shirts, trench coats, trousers, underwear, socks were arranged one by one.

The bookcase was reluctant to give it to him, so he just moved the piles of books on the small sofa in the study into cardboard boxes, thinking that if the person woke up after checking the information all night, he might sit there and watch him for a while.

There are two more pillows on the empty sofa in the living room. After all, kittens like soft and comfortable places.

It took over two weeks off work to finish.

Xie Daocan would come to occupy half of the bed from time to time, and sometimes, more than half of it would disappear after waking up.

The kitten he picked up hasn't matured yet, Bai Shou thought.

In the evening, he stood in the middle of the living room, looked around for a moment, then turned around and went out, went to the convenience store to pick up a bag of snacks and water that the man used to like, and before paying the bill... added a box of safety | condoms.

It feels like home now.As soon as this idea popped up, I suddenly felt very tired.

The shopping bag was casually left on the corner of the coffee table, and Bai Zun lay down on the sofa, the pain in his shoulders, neck and back emerged layer upon layer.

I don't know when I fell asleep.

As soon as he woke up, the floor lamp was on, and Xie Daocan leaned against his unbuttoned neckline, sniffing gently, like a kitten.

After losing those memories, this guy relied more on his sense of smell.

Seeing that Bai Zun was awake, Xie Daocan sat up straight.

He must have seen the shopping bag.Bai Shou thought, what he couldn't explain... There's no need to explain.

Nothing to say.

Xie Daocan raised his head, looked at the window and said, "The home and office are all shutters."

Bai Shou also looked there.

"Change." Xie Daocan said.

"Curtains?" Bai Zun asked, "What color looks good?"

"They all look good." Xie Daocan looked at him intently.

"Replace them with the same one?" Bai Shou asked.

Xie Daocan came over and answered him with his lips.

It was moist and warm, and Bai Zun began to miss this smell. He wrapped his arms around the back of Xie Daocan's neck and pulled him closer.

Xie Daocan bit Bai Zun's throat lightly.

"My lord prosecutor, I will do my best with such thorough preparations."

Neither of them said anything more.The stripped clothes were thrown on the ground.

Not much energy to exchange pleasantries.Like under the gray ice that has been silent for a whole winter, small red carps swim up one by one, flapping their tails, spreading out like cracks one after another, making the sound of early spring.

The bodies of the two overlapped again and again, and when they were gradually exerting their strength towards the increasingly clear place, Xie Daocan whispered in Bai Zun's ear, "Bai Zun, my small island."

Bai Zun was panting, like a survivor caught on the edge of a cliff, unable to utter any complete words.He still answered him, and he gave him the only thing he had at the moment, every inch of his heart and body.

The light in the living room was turned off, and the clothes were scattered under the sofa, and no one picked them up.

The two of them took a shower, went to bed, breath entangled, hugged each other tacitly, and waited.

"Calculate this week's rent."

Xie Daocan leaned on Bai Zun's shoulder, rubbed his palms on his waist, and left marks on his collarbone, neck, and heart with his lips and teeth.During those kisses, he said this vaguely.

Bai Zun understood.In the darkness, his voice was very calm.

"It seems that I am at a disadvantage when it comes to paying the rent."

Xie Daocan smiled, and leaned over, his knee skillfully touched the inner side of the knee of the person under him, and went up between the legs, opening him.

"It won't make you lose."

Xie Daochan said softly.His kiss followed the undulating body down, from the highlands to the plains, exploring, buried in the low, rugged valleys.

Under the long night with no light and no direction, Xie Daocan is like a little wild cat having fun in its own territory. Those bold and lively actions and words, Bai Zun is bewitched by them, let go of education, self-control, boundaries, Accommodating this person, I fell into a more permanent attrition.

☆,—32—

Xie Daochan disappeared for two weeks.Bai Shou did not take the initiative to find him.

The days of living together are very cramped, as long as you look up and turn around, you can see the shadow of "that person".

Xie Daocan cares about that self, and guesses from the clothes prepared for him, what kind of Xie Daocan used to be, how he lived, and how he got along with the people he likes.In every sentence and every expression of Bai Zun, measure whether this kind of self suits his wishes.

Bai Shou was still thinking about "that person", and he was very annoyed.His nose is as sharp as a kitten, and he can smell what Bai Zun is thinking, and it is often not himself.

At that time, I can't help but kiss him, and if the kiss is not enough, I will bite him and protest with him directly with my body. The two of them are often fighting like two kittens on the bed.

This is something that "that person" has never done, Xie Daocan thought, he seems to be able to use this thing to make Bai Zun