childhood sweethearts on chrysanthemum

Cheng Haoran stared blankly at the chicken soup in front of him, and suddenly Gu Anyuan's face was reflected in the soup bowl, the corners of his mouth were raised, with an evil smile on his face, and his voice sounded in his ears like a curse: "I'm gay, it's really okay Forcibly kissing you..."

Cheng Haoran was startled, and quickly knocked over the soup bowl in front of him.Before he could recover, his mother scolded him: "Cheng Haoran, why are you crazy?"

Only then did Cheng Haoran come to his senses, apologized hastily, got up and went back to the room, staring at the exercise book on the table and continued to be in a daze.

To be honest, he really has no concept of homosexuality, because none of the friends who played with him since he was a child like the same sex. Suddenly such a character appeared beside him, and Cheng Haoran felt very... Fresh, of course, if it wasn't If the other party kissed him forcefully.

But the strange thing is that although Gu Anyuan kissed him forcefully, he didn't feel sick at all.Strictly speaking, this is Cheng Haoran's first kiss. Although the gender is a bit different, the memories are still very good.Gu Anyuan's lips are very soft, with the fragrance of mint, and it feels very comfortable to be kissed by him, with a feeling of ecstasy; and Gu Anyuan's eyelashes are very long, his eyes are also beautiful, and when he talks to himself , I am the only one in those beautiful eyes; and Gu Anyuan has a good figure, his legs are so long, and his muscles are very strong when playing with him...

etc!Cheng Haoran suddenly realized, what was I thinking just now?Was I thinking of a man just now?Are you reminiscing about the kiss this afternoon!

Fuck!This is not good!

Cheng Haoran shook his head vigorously, trying to drive Gu Anyuan out of his head, but the more he thought about it, the more vivid the touch on his lips became, and the more vivid the touch, he couldn't help but think about Gu Anyuan, struggled for a long time, and the final result was that his head was full They are full of Gu Anyuan...

When Gu Anyuan came home, Deng Meijun was on the phone. Seeing him coming back, she hurriedly hung up the phone after explaining a few words, and walked towards Gu Anyuan with a smile: "Xiaoyuan is back, so I have to work overtime tonight, so I won't come back Stay here, be careful when you are alone at home, and call me if you have anything to do."

Gu Anyuan sneered, but didn't answer.

She used to be like this, with a gentle and considerate look every day, so the former self could tell her everything without reservation.

He couldn't figure it out, this woman has been pretending to be a loving mother for decades, isn't she tired?Now it doesn't matter whether it's making up for it or pretending, he will never forget the fierce face she had when she killed Mu Yan.

After all, it was his once most trusted relative who killed his former lover.

From the moment Mu Yan died, everything could not go back.

As soon as Ji Jingyan fell asleep, Su Ran received a call from Shen Tang. After briefly explaining the cause and effect of the matter, Su Ran thought for a long time before choosing to speak: "How is the matter between you and Ji Jingyan? What do you think?" ?”

There was a silence on the other side of the phone. After a long time, Shen Tang's voice came slowly through the radio waves: "Su Ran, do you remember what you said when you broke up with me? Tell me, you said I am a good girl, I should be worthy of someone better. But do you know, in my eyes, you are the best person in the world, and no one in the world can replace you. "

Su Ran's hand holding the phone trembled slightly, and Shen Tang on the other side of the phone continued: "I can understand you, since you told me that the person you love is Ji Jingyan three years ago, I have been able to understand Your feelings. But if I say that Ji Jingyan likes you, will you summon up the courage to express your heart to him?"

Su Ran was taken aback, Shen Tang's voice came softly through radio waves, but it easily hit the softest corner of Su Ran's heart.It seemed like a century before Su Ran slowly recovered her voice: "What did you say? Shen Tang, what do you mean by that?"

Shen Tang took a deep breath, and seemed to have made a lot of determination to say: "Su Ran, I like you, so I hope you live a happier life than anyone else. What you saw in the hospital a few days ago was just I played a scene with Ji Jingyan, can you...can you understand what I mean?"

A play?Su then backed up a few steps, leaning on the wall to barely stand still.Ji Jingyan was indeed lying to him, but why did Ji Jingyan lie to him?

Su Ran's brain was in a mess, only Shen Tang's voice was very clear in his ears: "I'm not sure what Ji Jingyan thinks in his heart, but as a girl's sixth sense tells me, maybe Ji Jingyan also likes you Yes, that's why I evade your enthusiasm in every possible way..."

Su Ran's head exploded with a "boom": Ji Jingyan, he... likes me?How can this be!

This is something Su Ran never thought about, never expected to be with Ji Jingyan.He was going to pretend to be crazy and foolish for the rest of his life, hiding his humble love in his heart forever, and silently guarding Ji Jingyan, that was enough.

Shen Tang's words were like a ray of light shining into his dark heart, a ray of light that was enough to save his humble love.

"Shen Tang," Su Ran's voice was a little hoarse when he spoke again, "Why are you telling me this all of a sudden?"

"Because Ji Jingyan is also my friend, I don't want to make him feel bad." Shen Tang paused for a moment, and then said, "Uncle has already left, and Auntie's mood is still a little unstable. The only one who can comfort him now is you gone."

"I'm really not willing to give you up to him, but Su Ran, do you know? Now your heart is full of him, and you don't leave any room for others, and you don't leave any room for yourself. Instead of letting The three of us are in pain, maybe I quit, that's the best ending..."

"I think that the 12-year relationship between the two of you will eventually have a result, a result where everyone can reap happiness."

Shen Tang's words echoed clearly in her ears, she said that the scene that made her suffer for several days was just acting, she said that the person Ji Jingyan really liked was herself.He couldn't understand, since everything was as Shen Tang said, why did Ji Jingyan push him away again and again, and why he never responded to his feelings positively?

Su Ran looked at the sleeping Ji Jingyan, and he found that he couldn't see through his childhood sweetheart more and more...

Cheng Haoran was sitting in front of the computer desk, he couldn't figure out why he, who should be sitting in front of the desk doing questions now, would go online to check the harm of homosexuality to the human body for no apparent reason!

I don't like men, I'm just a little curious, well, that's right.

Cheng Haoran finally clicked on the webpage under his own constant psychological hints, and slowly began to browse news about homosexuality.

It turns out that there are still so many homosexuals in the world...

The odds of homosexuality spreading AIDS are so high, my God!

There are so many handsome guys in the gay circle, is it true that all the good-looking people in this world are gay!

这个圈子里1少0多，咦？这是为什么？那么顾安远是1是0？不能是0吧，他那一副全世界都都欠了他500万的样子怎么会被人上？那他要是1的话，岂不会很抢手……

At this time, Cheng Haoran didn't react at all, and now his thinking was completely following Gu Anyuan.

While thinking about it, when he slid the mouse down, a capital GV came into his eyes.Cheng Haoran shook his hand, and went in unexpectedly.

Although it was just a screenshot, it was still a mosaic screenshot, but Cheng Haoran's mouth was still thirsty.After researching for a long time, Cheng Haoran discovered that the so-called men and men being together means that the woman under him can be replaced by a man, and there is no difference in other things...

At this moment, Gu Anyuan, who was lying on the bed, didn't realize at all that his unintentional action had become his deskmate's first teacher in a certain way, and made him go forever on the road to becoming a gay.

When Ji Jingyan woke up, he saw Su Ran sitting beside the bed, looking at him thoughtfully.

Ji Jingyan got up and looked at Su Ran with a puzzled face: "What's wrong with you? Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Ji Jingyan," Su Ran thought for a long time before speaking, "Do you mind if someone around you is gay?"

Ji Jingyan was taken aback by Su Ran's question, then turned his face unnaturally, looked out of the window and said, "Everyone has the right to choose their own sexuality, this kind of thing can't be changed whether I mind it or not. .”

"Then do you find them disgusting?"

Ji Jingyan turned his head and looked at Su Ran who was sitting on the side of the bed. He leaned forward slightly, crossed his slender fingers, and stared at him closely, not giving him the right to dodge.

Ji Jingyan swallowed unconsciously, gripped the bed sheet tightly with both hands, pursed his lips slightly, kept dodging Su Ran's eyes, thought for a long time before opening his mouth: "I think they... are disgusting..."

Su Ran gradually clenched her fists: Ji Jingyan, you are lying again, what are you running away from?Are you running away from me, or are you running away from your own heart...

Su Ran settled down, and gradually approached Ji Jingyan's side face. Ji Jingyan instinctively wanted to dodge, but Su Ran didn't give him this chance at all. She raised her hand to wrap his arms around his shoulders, making him lean close to her almost forcefully, watching The lips that were close at hand, forcibly suppressed the desire to kiss them, and said close to his ear: "Let's talk after the college entrance examination, Ji Jingyan..."

Su Ran's slightly dangerous voice was next to his ear, and the hot breath he exhaled kept rubbing against his eardrums and stirring his heart.

Ji Jingyan turned his head and met Su Ran's eyes, his voice was also unquestionably firm: "Well, let's talk."

The night in the hospital was terribly silent, only the sound of each other's breathing was left around, and the hot breath was intertwined, and the hot air was sprayed on each other's face, adding a little ambiguity.

After 12 years of persistence, it is time to give a result.

Don't let yourself down, and don't let your youth down.

The author has something to say: I have to confess, I have to confess, I finally have to give sugar, I finally said it~

Chapter 17

After Ji Feng's funeral, there were less than 20 days left before the college entrance examination.Shen Wanyan has been mentally unstable since Ji Feng's death, whenever she sees something about Ji Feng, she will go to Su Ran's house and yell at him.In order to calm her down, Ji Jingyan's grandmother had no choice but to take her to live in her hometown in the south for a while, while Ji Jingyan stayed here to prepare for the college entrance examination.

Every time Ji Jingyan talked with his mother on the phone, Shen Wanyan kept telling him to stay away from Su Ran and his son. If it wasn't for them, Ji Feng wouldn't have died, and his family wouldn't have become so fragmented.The origin of all these tragedies is Su Tengfei's fault!

Facing Shen Wanyan's heart-piercing, Ji Jingyan had no choice but to respond, coupled with the promised conversation in the hospital, Ji Jingyan selectively evaded Su Ran, and also evaded his own heart.

There are still 20 days before the college entrance examination, Cheng Haoran is a little sentimental.

One part is because of the upcoming parting, and the other part is that he may not see Gu Anyuan in the future.

Although after the forced kiss incident, the way he and Gu Anyuan get along is not much different from before, Cheng Haoran still feels that he is a little different from before. For example, every time Gu Anyuan meets him, he will blush and his heart beats; He has an urge to touch the muscles on his body; for another example, seeing Gu Anyuan's slender fingers constantly turning his pen, he wants to hold his hand...

And yet he did!

At this moment, Gu Anyuan was thinking about the relationship between Ji Jingyan and Su Ran who suddenly fell to freezing point, when he felt a warm touch on his hand, he turned his head slowly, and met Cheng Haoran's bewildered face.

Excuseme?

Only then did Cheng Haoran realize what he had just done, he hurriedly let go of his hand, and laughed a few times dryly: "You had a mosquito on your hand just now, I'll pat it for you, it's a bit strange, hahaha..." Said He didn't care about Gu Anyuan's expression, and started to do his homework.

Seeing Cheng Haoran's panic-stricken look, Gu Anyuan narrowed his eyes: There's something wrong with this kid...

After thinking about it for a while, Gu Anyuan smirked, leaned close to Cheng Haoran's ear and said, "Why are you touching my hand?"

Gu Anyuan's voice sounded in Cheng Haoran's ear, with a hint of maturity in it.He instinctively wanted to dodge, but because he was sitting against the wall, he couldn't dodge at all, so he had to bite the bullet and say, "You...you have mosquitoes on your hands, I drove them away for you..."

"Oh?" Gu Anyuan's voice rose a tune, "So I have to thank you! How can I thank you? How about a promise from your body?"

When Cheng Haoran heard this, his face turned red to the ears, and he couldn't speak at all: "What, why do you agree with your body? Everyone, everyone is a man..."

"Who says a man can't make a promise with his body?" Gu Anyuan was almost sticking to Cheng Haoran's ear, his lips could touch Cheng Haoran's earlobe between opening and closing, "Don't forget, I only like men..."

These words sounded like a muffled thunder in Cheng Haoran's ears, and Cheng Haoran was stunned for a long time before he gradually came to his senses, and his head finally recovered the thinking that a science student should have.

It seems that something has gone wrong since I knew that Gu Anyuan liked men. What's going on, am I going to change my mind?

No no no, it can't be like this, I'm straight, I must be straight...

Cheng Haoran was about to shake his head, but who knew that Gu Anyuan's lips that were close to his ear hadn't had time to retract, so he kissed his ear, and the warm touch of his lips made Gu Anyuan stunned.

The moment Gu Anyuan's lips touched Cheng Haoran's ear, the soft touch on the ear stimulated Cheng Haoran's chaotic brain. He jumped up like a frightened rabbit, touched his red ear with his fingers, and looked at Gu Anyuan. Shouted: "Gu Anyuan, why are you kissing me!"

Gu Anyuan didn't react until he heard Cheng Haoran's cry, quickly grabbed his arm, and cursed in a low voice: "What's your name, you idiot!"

Cheng Haoran turned his head, looked at the whole class who were watching the excitement, blushed, and did it resentfully.

Gu Anyuan glared at him, ruffled his hair, and cursed with a smile: "You are so stupid, I really wonder how you lived to such an age..."

Cheng Haoran gave him a blank look, and didn't speak again, but the red ears betrayed his uneasy heart.

Ji Jingyan looked up at the farce happening in front of him, Su Ran came over abruptly, and whispered: "Don't tell me, they really match well."

Ji Jingyan responded with a smile.

Su Ran turned her head to look at Ji Jingyan's smiling eyes, half seriously, half jokingly asked: "If they are together, will there be hope for us?"

Ji Jingyan didn't react, and asked, "What is there hope for?"

Su Ran looked into Ji Jingyan's bright eyes, and spoke slowly, as if making a promise for a lifetime: "There is hope to be together."

Ji Jingyan met his eyes, and for the first time did not avoid his fiery eyes: "After the college entrance examination, let's talk about these things again, okay? I won't avoid it anymore, you trust me."

Su Ran looked at Ji Jingyan's determined face, nodded her head, and softened her voice: "Well, I'll wait for you."

Whether it is 20 days or 20 years, I will wait for you, forever.

The 20 days are fleeting.

June is a month full of parting, and the weather is so hot that it burns everyone's heart.

On the afternoon when the college entrance examination ended, Ji Jingyan ran into Cheng Haoran by chance.Cheng Haoran glanced at him listlessly, and after deliberating for a while, he said, "Ji Jingyan, I have something to ask you."

Ji Jingyan smiled, and answered with an expression of "I understand", "Is it about Gu Anyuan?"

Cheng Haoran lowered his head and responded: "You said I fell in love with Gu Anyuan, what should I do? Should I confess my love or just keep it in my heart?"

Ji Jingyan was taken aback, he never expected Cheng Haoran to admit his feelings so generously, compared with him, he is simply a coward.

Seeing that Ji Jingyan didn't answer him, Cheng Haoran thought that Ji Jingyan was disgusted with him, so he quickly explained to himself: "Ji Jingyan, don't think I'm disgusting, I, I just thought you and Su Ran had a good relationship, so I thought you wouldn't mind These are the things that are asked of you."

Ji Jingyan smiled, shook his head, and asked him back: "Why did you think of confessing to Gu Anyuan? You have to know that dating a man will affect your family and your future life."

"I know," Cheng Haoran continued in a muffled voice, "I understand all this, but what should I do if I just like him? If I'm not with him, I always feel like I've let myself down. Young, do some crazy things, and be with someone you really like." Cheng Haoran glanced at Ji Jingyan, and then said, "But I still don't have the confidence to confess to him, what if he rejects me? Ji Jingyan, you Do you know what kind of boy he likes?"

Ji Jingyan looked at the enthusiastic Cheng Haoran, and finally asked the worries that had been hidden in his heart for many years: "But Cheng Haoran, do you not mind how others look at you? Also, if you two are together, are you two men really interested?" Does it have a future?"

"I don't know if there is a future. Who can say for sure? Happiness is the most important thing!" Cheng Haoran grinned, "A man should dare to chase the person he likes! Anyway We are still young, even if we made mistakes, they are worthy of forgiveness. Just..." He hesitated for a while, and then said: "I'm just afraid that Gu Anyuan will reject me, this is really embarrassing."

Because you are young, you will be forgiven no matter what you do, even if you are with a man, is it okay?Is it okay to do something that no one understands?

Seeing Ji Jingyan's thoughtful look, Cheng Haoran already understood in his heart: "Are you thinking about Su Ran?"

Ji Jingyan turned his head and stared at Gu Anyuan with wide eyes, wondering, "How do you know?"

"Your expression has already betrayed you, forget it," he sighed, "You haven't figured out your own affairs, and I don't expect you to understand mine." He pointed to the corner of the road: "When I came just now, I saw Su Ran waiting for you there. You can go to him. I'll think about my own affairs."

After Cheng Haoran finished speaking, he didn't give Ji Jingyan a chance to speak, and walked away. Ji Jingyan thought for a long time at a distance, and then walked step by step towards the corner of the road.

Can you really do it yourself?Try to be crazy once, try hard to chase your love, no longer care about other people's strange eyes, and don't care about other people's opinions, really, go crazy for yourself once.

As the distance to the corner of the road got closer and closer, Su Ran's figure gradually appeared in front of him, and Su Ran's tall and straight figure came into his eyes.The two have been together for 12 years, and they have gradually become the most familiar with each other from strangers. Among them, there is friendship, family affection, and gradually love, and all kinds of feelings that should not have arisen.

Su ran has always been brave, and he never hides his feelings.In Ji Jingyan's memory, Su Ran might be the hero in his heart. No matter what happened to him or what he went through, Su Ran would always be by his side and never left.

Su Ran turned her head and saw Ji Jingyan standing behind her.He stood against the light, and the afternoon sun covered a layer of gold behind him. He walked towards Ji Jingyan step by step, with a bright smile on the corner of his mouth: "You are here, I have been waiting for you for a long time."

Ji Jingyan looked at the cheerful young man in front of him, he had been waiting for nearly 12 years.

Ji Jingyan raised his head, looked at the familiar face, and replied softly: "Well, I'm here, and I'll give you an answer."

After 12 years, I have finally come to you, and I will no longer run away from you, nor will I make you wait hopelessly.

After finishing speaking, regardless of the astonishment on Su Ran's face, he gently held his hand hanging by his side, raised his head and kissed Su Ran's slightly opened lips because of surprise, the softness on his lips told him that this was waiting for him The only love for so many years.

This is the only madness in my youth, falling in love is falling in love, it has nothing to do with time or gender, as long as the other party is you, it is enough.

Because it's you, I think all my madness is worth it.

The author has something to say: Rolling around asking for comments, I finally wrote a confession, so happy~