sunk into the earth

"Sound? Sound?"

Mother held the clothes she brought with one hand, and patted Cheng Sheng's shoulder with the other, reminding him: "Change quickly, we can leave the hospital directly after Xiao Zhang finishes the formalities."

Cheng Sheng came back to his senses, took the clothes with an "ah" sound, raised his head and asked his mother, "Why has he been gone for so long?"

"Your doctor left him alone to talk about the matter. He said that he would go through the discharge procedures for you after talking with the doctor, so it was delayed for a long time." Mom closed the suitcase that was open on the ground, thought of something, smiled and shook her head: "So I Just give him your ID card and medical insurance card, and come back alone to urge you to pack your things."

Cheng Sheng was about to go to the bathroom with his clothes in his arms, when he heard this, he suddenly screamed, turned his head with wide eyes and asked, "Did you give him my ID card? That photo is so ugly!"

"Aren't you ugly? How energetic were you then!" Seeing him stop, his mother waved her hand in the direction of the bathroom, urging him: "Go quickly, didn't you say that this hospital suffocated you to death? I can't bear it now? "

As soon as Cheng Sheng heard it, he rushed to the bathroom, carefully closed the door, and blocked out the small sounds of packing things outside.

Instead of changing immediately, he sat on the toilet, counting the days with his head down, how many days until the music festival in April.

It is now early March and spring is here.Cheng Sheng was walking downstairs with the nurse and Zhang Chen one day, and suddenly found that the withered grass in the courtyard downstairs had sprouted green overnight. beginning.

He seemed to have faded into a child overnight, squatting on the ground to look at the flowers and plants that had just sprouted, and took Zhang Chen's arms to point to him one by one, and said excitedly: "They are like you! After a winter, they are so beautiful! Come alive."

Zhang Chen glanced at him sideways, not knowing what he was thinking, he just said, "It's quite like you."

Cheng Sheng kept laughing, and patted Zhang Chen's chest casually, his eyes brightened when he spoke, "I'm worse than you."

After finishing speaking, regardless of the other patients walking downstairs who were still present, he jumped onto Zhang Chen's back, stabilized his balance three or two times, buried his face in the back of Zhang Chen's neck, feeling his body temperature and the few breaths blowing over him. Wisp Hefeng, closed his eyes contentedly, and whispered: "Spring is here, it's great."

Spring came, and Cheng Sheng spent a whole month and a half across the Spring Festival in this single ward.

In the beginning, my mother always scolded him—you should inform me and your father before you are hospitalized. Your father can arrange a hospital with a VIP ward for you and a special escort room. I accompanied your father when he had an operation last year. Comparable Your conditions here are much better, like a hotel, I don't have to squeeze in this room with you all the time.

But later she saw more of Cheng Sheng's appearance when he was in a fit, and she no longer dared to say anything to complain, and followed him in everything.Later on, even though Cheng Sheng gradually got better and acted almost like a normal person recently, she has long been used to staying silently by the side, unwilling to say anything unnecessary.

When did Cheng Sheng's spring come?

He remembered that there was still a cold wind blowing that night, the bitter wind woke him up, and the dark window not far away engulfed him, he finally found his own answer, all the unexamined pain went away with the tail of winter , followed by his spring buds.

After returning to the ward that night, Cheng Sheng quickly fell asleep. He had lived for 28 years, and he had never fallen asleep in such a peaceful state of mind since he could remember. His past love, hatred, anger, and ignorance were not mentioned in front of death. He had decided the ending in advance. In the last days, everything around him was only beautiful and peaceful, and he wanted to feel only good things in the remaining days.

The next morning, Cheng Sheng woke up very early, and his condition was a hundred times better than every difficult morning in the past. His cheeks were covered with a flush of light from beginning to end, and even his body pain was much relieved. His movements were no longer uncoordinated, and his joints There is no soreness anymore, and I can get out of bed and wash by myself without my mother's help.

After washing, he felt comfortable all over. As soon as he got out of the bathroom, he saw Zhang Chen, who had come to change his mother's class, come in. He wiped his face and asked him with a smile, "How was the performance yesterday?"

Zhang Chen was still carrying a video camera that day. He put the breakfast box on the table and shook the camera in his hand towards Cheng Sheng, "I asked Qin Xiao to record it for you. I know you want to watch it."

Cheng Sheng is very familiar with that camera. It was bought by himself and Qin Xiao many years ago in the newly opened digital city to shoot things for fun. It contains a memory card full of videos he took casually when he was depressed. .Seeing this familiar object, Cheng Sheng's originally peaceful heart fluctuated slightly, but it was very small. He quickly pulled Zhang Chen to sit beside his hospital bed, pretending to be anxious to watch his performance last night.

There are only Zhang Chen and Lao Liu in the camera screen. They performed two old songs, all of which are re-arranged versions. Zhang Chen is quite different from the original appearance when he played the piano. He is aware of the existence of the camera and looks at it with a smile from time to time. .This kind of special smile and eyes that cannot be concealed inevitably made people misunderstand. The audience over there made some strange noises, and dozens of pairs of surprised eyes looked towards the direction of the camera together.

Sitting on the hospital bed, Cheng Sheng was stunned for a moment. It was rare for him to see Zhang Chen laughing like this. Even through the screen, he still had some palpitations, but soon he felt his hand on the side of the bed being firmly held by someone. The hot touch couldn't help moving him, Cheng Sheng realized that there was no need for words between himself and Zhang Chen, he should have understood his heart long ago, should have given up being timid, and loved and responded to him as passionately as before.

Cheng Sheng laughed sincerely along with Zhang Chen who was playing the piano on the screen, no longer thinking about any trivial issues, just focusing on watching this long-lost performance.

The two songs add up to less than 10 minutes. Just when he thought it was about to end, the lights on the screen suddenly changed, followed by three unexpected extras, including two unreleased new songs. The excitement boiled over, and a girl in the screen took advantage of the introduction time to shout to the stage: "How soon will the new album be released?"

On stage, Zhang Chen replied, "About August."

Cheng Sheng held the old video camera in his arms like a treasure, and thought: Fortunately, I had the opportunity to finish listening to it ahead of time, otherwise August would be a pity again.

He didn't want to let go until he had finished the five songs. He held the machine and watched it again from beginning to end. It wasn't until Zhang Chen sat next to him with a thermos bucket and urged him that he reluctantly put down the camera and picked up the machine. Slowly eat the breakfast in Zhang Chen's hand.

After that day, Cheng Sheng's condition became stronger day by day, and he spent much less time alone, and even his favorite window seemed to lose its appeal. Whenever he had time, Cheng Sheng would take his mother to chat with Zhang Chen, and give it to him. They told their own stories over the years, those painful experiences were infinitely reduced by him, and they blurted out as easily as telling anecdotes.

Even his doctor was surprised, so he took the time to call Zhang Chen, the patient's family member, to inquire for a while, and finally came to the conclusion: "Observe for two more days, and if there is no accident, he can be discharged next week."

Zhang Chen was not as relaxed as he imagined. He was too sensitive and could always detect something was wrong. He said to the doctor: "I think he is very strange, as if he suddenly wanted to go away."

The doctor rarely seemed a little worried, "The healing of mental illness itself is extremely unstable. Cheng Sheng is rarely in this situation, but I have seen such cases. It was very serious at first. Treatment combined with psychological counseling cured him quickly, and there was no relapse in the next few years. The family members must pay attention to observe in the future life to see if he can reintegrate into society and whether he has lost interest in the things he was interested in before. If something is wrong, you must come to the hospital for reexamination in time.”

The two of them have been watching carefully, but Cheng Sheng did not appear in the rest of the week that other people were worried about. His condition has been stable in those days, and he even specially called Frank to talk about it in the ward in the last few days. After I was discharged from the hospital, I had to go through the acquisition procedures.

Zhang Chen kept observing him from the side. When he saw that his hands, which used to be folded when he talked about work, were completely released and put on his lap casually, he seemed to understand that Cheng Sheng no longer oppressed him like that, and lowered his head. smiled.

A few days later, the doctor came down to inform her that it happened to be Cheng Sheng's mother's birthday. On the way to the hospital, she went to the cake shop to pick up a cake that had been ordered early and brought it to the ward. The two children said hello, quickly opened the package, cut a piece for Cheng Sheng, and another piece for Zhang Chen.

When it was her turn, she suddenly choked up for some reason, and her gradually rough hands trembled uncontrollably, and within a few seconds she covered her face, and at the same time, a suppressed cry came from behind her palms.Tears kept spilling from between her fingers, she didn't want her son and Zhang Chen to see, and finally hid in the toilet, and came out with red and swollen eyelids for a full hour.

She had already figured it out, glanced at Cheng Sheng, then at Zhang Chen, took her son's hand and asked, "Aren't you going home after you leave the hospital? Are you still living with Xiao Zhang?"

Cheng Sheng nodded and said, "I will go back to see you often."

Mom also nodded, pulled the hands of the two into her arms and clenched them tightly, and kept repeating: "As long as you feel good, you can do anything..."

Cheng Sheng looked at her sunken cheeks in just one and a half months, then turned to look at Zhang Chen aside, and said in his heart: There will be no better ending than my decision, whether you forgive me or not, I will go this way.

The day of discharge from the hospital finally came. Cheng Sheng got his wish and took off the hospital gown that was almost growing on him, and changed back into the new clothes his mother brought back with some discomfort.He sat on the toilet and counted over and over again the days he had less than two months left, and then he found that it was as long as the time he stayed in Yuncheng ten years ago.

Cheng Sheng was completely relieved, he didn't have any regrets, he just wanted to use the purest self to experience all the feelings again, so he typed the plan for the remaining days on his phone contentedly:

1. Go back to the house of parents, grandparents and aunts every weekend, cook for them and chat with them

2. Take another photo with Qin Xiao and Chang Xin, and hang it in Lao Qin Bar

3. Introduce a boyfriend to Sister Haiyan

4. Pierce the original place of the right ear again

5. Dress fancy

6. Learn the drums again, let the producer Zhang Da personally teach me and cooperate with me

7. Say "I love you" to Zhang Chen every day until the last day