Time is not alluring

My mother and I seldom sit and chat together. She is busy with work and I am busy with study. Except for getting up in the morning to say hello, and chatting casually during meals, serious chats like this are really rare.

Mom turned down the volume of the TV, turned her head to look at me, and said distressedly, "You've lost a lot of weight recently."

I touched my cheeks, touched my cheekbones, slightly shook my hands, and said, "I'm not thin..."

"In the second year of high school, the study pressure is very heavy."

"Fortunately...it's not too big..." I didn't want to make my mother worry, but my mother looked more worried when I said this, and quickly changed my words, "It's a little more stressful than the first year of high school, sometimes I feel I can't breathe , but it’s okay, high school is like this.”

Mom sighed and said, "Didn't you go out with your friends to relax?"

I replied nah, "No..."

"The new class... the teacher and the classmates get along pretty well, right?"

I nodded sincerely, and my mother said again, "I'm really afraid of you..."

Look, she is talking about the past again, but she was in school when she was a child, she was always bullied by the fat man at the next table, and was often frightened by the fat man so that she hid in the toilet and cried secretly, but she didn't dare to say anything.

Later, my mother found out that I had a dull personality and was not good at speaking, which made my mother think that I left a shadow and suffered from social phobia.

She didn't know that a person's character is born. I'm not afraid, but inferior and not good at communication. As for the report that I didn't beat the fat man to death, I probably felt that making small reports was not in line with the demeanor of a heroine.

"Xiaoxu chose science..."

As soon as I heard Liu Xu's name, my heart pounded, and I began to repent. I hurriedly held the cup and said something to my mother. It was very late and I was sleepy and going to bed, so I ran back to the room.

Seeing An An fleeing in despair, mother sighed leisurely, her face full of preoccupations, "What should I do?"

After drinking the water, I lay on the bed, tossing and turning, unable to fall asleep, looking at the ceiling and counting sheep.

a little sheep...

Two little sheep...

So many catkins...

There was a buzzing in my head, the sheep were arguing with the sheep, the catkins were arguing with the catkins, and I was arguing with me.

In the end, I begged them to take a break and live in peace for a while, because I drank a little too much water and needed to go to the bathroom.

I came out, walked across the living room, and found that my mother was not there, probably going to bed. I had a flash of inspiration, and I groped my body, groped under the TV cabinet, and dug out the medicine box.

It is written like this in the novels, most of the people who take sleeping pills have mental problems, and there will be a handsome male protagonist who will throw all these sleeping pills into the trash can.

The voice said softly, with me here, what are you afraid of?

And the heroine, usually weeping, ran to the trash can again and again, shouting that I can't do it, really can't do it, please.

Naturally, the male protagonist will not give in, he pulls the female protagonist and refuses to let her go, there is no way out, he pushes the female protagonist against the wall, starts a fire, and then the female protagonist really suffers from insomnia.

I stopped rummaging through the medicine box, unable to look directly at the cold spirit in my hand, threw the cold medicine away, and pushed the medicine box back.

He beat his head, what kind of messed-up picture was he thinking about that children should not be banned for eighteen years!

and many more…

I'm 17 years old... and one more year... Does it mean that when I become an adult, I can watch the Eighteen Bans openly?

wipe.

What the hell was I thinking, sober up, being an adult doesn't mean being able to do things you couldn't do before, it should be more positive, a little more positive.

Standing up, I suddenly saw my mother standing next to me. I was so shocked that most of my soul went away. I patted my chest and said, "Mom, you scared me to death."

"Hmm." My mother looked at me with bright eyes.

"I'll get up and go to the toilet." I touched my nose and smiled.

My mother stuffed a cup of hot stuff into my hand, saying it was for calming the nerves and nourishing the brain. I said, why don't you go to bed so late, why are you messing with this?

Mom said, try the taste, and worry that I won't be able to drink it.

"thanks Mom."

I was very moved, and walked into the room with my mother's loving nutritional brain tonic liquid, and there was a layer of black stuff floating on it, and the smell was quite pleasant, like the aroma of malt.

After drinking, I couldn't fall asleep even more. I lay my head on my head, crossed my legs, looked at the ceiling, and began to think about life.

Turning her gaze, there seemed to be a shadow hiding there by the window, while I was falling asleep, she ran into my dreamland, and started a messy back and forth, and finally, she patted her buttocks and left.

So merciless, motherfucker...

The sequelae left by this erotic dream made my life a bit miserable, but when I close my eyes, the picture will come alive.

Every detail, every little action, every hum, is like a movie replay, reproduced one by one without any detail.

It's true that my mental strength is a bit weak. I was drowsy in class. Teacher Sun Yan talked about it. I crossed the Pacific Ocean and came to Asia. I passed a certain strait, crossed a certain mountain range, and saw a certain scenery.

Ah, students, this is another test site.

Teacher Zhang Ming asked me very concerned, if I feel uncomfortable, should I ask for leave?

I shook my head and said, thank you teacher, I'm fine.

Teacher Zhang Ming was worried, and confessed again, "If you feel uncomfortable, tell the teacher."

I nodded and said yes, if it was Tai Renbin, wouldn't he come over and ask me if I'm not feeling well?

Later I found out that there is no cure for this disease, and I can only drag it on day by day, until the end of the years, swallowing my last breath, and ending the name before and after.

After I finished speaking, my whole body became boring. I was spinning and turning with the pen, and it fell to the ground with a snap.

I bent down to pick it up, drew a few times on the draft paper, and the water was cut off. I didn't believe in evil, so I tried very hard to scratch the draft paper into pieces.

In the end, he threw the pen away angrily, and the little hypocrisy in his heart came up again.

If it was Liu Xu, she would definitely not be so stupid, turning the pen to the water stop, and childishly losing her temper at an innocent pen that can't speak.

But... Look clearly, I am not Liu Xu, so you must bear my anger obediently.

I picked up the pen, put it in my hand, and turned it again. After a few turns, it fell off again with a snap.

The kind Qu Xiaoxiao picked it up for me, and I said thank you angrily.

She saw the sulking on my face, and asked casually, "Hey, who made you angry?"

"No one."

"Then this pen is really pitiful, the case is broken." Qu Xiaoxiao felt sorry.

I looked at the pen coldly, and felt that she deserved it. She just stopped writing and drawing, but ran around in circles. Who is to blame?

"Let's go." Qu Xiaoxiao hooked my shoulder, and I squinted, and said, "Where are you going?"

"Basketball court!" Qu Xiaoxiao took the basketball thrown by her partner, looking very cool.

"No." I refused, but was forcibly pulled away by Qu Xiaoxiao, "If you don't go, you have to go."

"Why?" I glared at her and said again, "I don't know how to play basketball."

I suddenly felt that my temper is getting stronger now, if it was changed before, I must have followed in silence?

"Then cheer me on."

At the beginning of school in Jiangnan, there will be a freshmen basketball cup match between seniors and seniors, mainly to promote friendship exchanges and development between freshmen and old students.

I sat on the stone steps beside the basketball court, and the people next to me were full of enthusiasm, even though the referee whistled frequently, even though the scoreboard had not moved after the first half.

They still shouted the slogan of their class loudly.

Class [-] will win, Class [-], come on.

boring.

I held my chin, looked away, and stretched out my hand to pull the grass growing on the stone steps.

Qu Xiaoxiao came down from the basketball court, sweating profusely, her hair and clothes were wet, I tactfully handed over a bottle of mineral water, after all Zhang Ming was by my side, I couldn't be too lazy.

"Thank you."

Qu Xiaoxiao took it, and turned her head to her mouth. The arc of her neck stretched out the gracefulness of a white swan. It was obviously a very indecent movement, but it made people feel a bit bold.

The grass on the stone steps was tossed back and forth by me, and there was no dross left. The sun set to the west, and the competition finally came to an end.

In the end, I didn't watch it, but judging from the audience's reaction, Class [-] should have won.

They came over under the cheers of the crowd, Qu Xiaoxiao pushed aside the crowd, walked towards me in the corner, patted my head, and said, "Aren't you happy?"

I was thinking about how to divide the grass, whether to split it into two halves, or cut it across the middle, when Qu Xiaoxiao suddenly snapped, the grass was broken by me.

"It's over?" I blinked my sore eyes.

Qu Xiaoxiao nodded.

"Hey, let's talk about you." Qu Xiaoxiao hooked my shoulder and said, "Why are you unhappy?"

I'm not used to people getting too close, so after struggling a little, Qu Xiaoxiao hugged her even tighter, so she gave up and said, "I'm not unhappy."

"Lie." Qu Xiaoxiao affirmed, and said, "Let me buy you something to eat."

"Need not…"

She ignored my refusal, pulled me up arbitrarily, crossed the main road, and walked towards the store.

I stared blankly at Qu Xiaoxiao holding my hand, and suddenly realized that in this world, everyone is an independent entity with different characteristics.

Liu Xu is different from Qu Xiaoxiao, Liu Xu never makes things difficult for me, and always calls my name gently and gently.

Ann.Liu Xu turned her head and said to me with a smile, do you want to eat oden?

And Qu Xiaoxiao—the grand, domineering one, boss, give me two oden dishes!

She doesn't ask for my opinion, I don't know if it's because she makes the money or if my opinion doesn't matter.

Qu Xiaoxiao made a mistake. Eating can't heal people's mood. He can only satisfy people's stomachs. Sometimes, if they are too satisfied, they will become a burden.

Like now.

After I finished eating, it was even worse, because I saw two people coming out from Jiangnan opposite, one was Liu Xu, and the other was... I didn't know him, it should be her new tablemate.

My stomach seemed to have been stuffed with a few servings of oden, and it hurt so badly that I almost fainted.

Of course, at this time, I didn't know that this was something called possessiveness, and it had nothing to do with oden.

Looking at me like this, Qu Xiaoxiao knew that she had eaten too much, so she asked very concerned, "Are you okay?"

She suddenly reached out to rub my stomach, I was startled, Qu Xiaoxiao withdrew her hand awkwardly, and explained awkwardly, "I used to have indigestion, and my mother always did that...rubbing my stomach."

I smiled reluctantly, but you are not my mother, I rolled my eyes and saw Liu Xu walking across the road, I quietly hid behind Qu Xiaoxiao, urging her to leave quickly.

"wait."

We walked not far, Qu Xiaoxiao suddenly stopped, and ran towards one direction, my Erzhang monk couldn't figure it out, Qu Xiaoxiao came back with a bag of things in his hand.

"Give you."

"What?" I asked.

"medicine."

I looked through and found Jianwei Xiaoshi Tablets and two bottles of mineral water. I was very moved and said thank you.

"Then thank you forever." Qu Xiaoxiao smiled.

I was stunned, it wasn't that I heard such distant words as a lifetime, but Qu Xiaoxiao's answer, if it was Liu Xu, she would reply me like this, An An, you are sick, who wants you to thank me?

One needs to be cleared up, one needs to be delayed for a lifetime, one is an old tablemate who has been with me for 17 years, and the other is a new tablemate who has just been promoted for a month.

The less the similarities, the more I can't help but compare the two and find out who is more valuable and who is more missed.

Even ending the conversation between two people is different.

"An'an?"

"Ok?"

"Are you still watching the basketball game tomorrow?" Qu Xiaoxiao emphasized, "It's the final!"

I tilted my head and thought for a while, wanting to refuse, saw the expectation in her eyes, couldn't bear to let her down, nodded, and said, "Okay."

"must?"

"must."