Hey, fate

Today's evening self-study was extraordinarily quiet, because this time the ranking of the entire grade had dropped, and it would be the same in a short time. Everyone felt like an enemy, and the surrounding atmosphere changed, becoming more gloomy and depressing.

Xie Feng sorted out the wrong questions in each subject. He felt that this was a subconscious action. After he finished, he still felt like he hadn’t done anything. Looking back at those wrong questions, he returned to the wrong train of thought. After a few questions, he Throwing the pen aside, rubbing his sore eyes, a deep exhaustion welled up from the depths of his body.

The art students have all left school, Chen Lin and Chang Cheng have left, and it will be a [-]-day countdown when they come back next time, and he doesn't want to make new friends, so he is alone during this time.

Being alone for a long time, he seldom speaks. Except for Chen Ran asking him to discuss the topic, he is in a daze after finishing his homework and planning.

As time goes by, he feels that he has nothing to do with anything around him. He lives in his own world, so lonely that no one can see him.

He intuitively felt that something was wrong, but he didn't know what to do, and the strong sense of powerlessness drove him to the point of collapse.

The dull and boring life, and the increasing pressure are wearing down his mind bit by bit.

He opened the exchange diary with An Jia and wrote on it: "I'm in a bad state right now, I can't learn anything, I guess I've hit a bottleneck period, I don't know what to do, I'm very tired now."

Xie Feng lay on the table, full of frustration, he didn't like himself like this, he couldn't even adjust his emotions well, he was still struggling with little things, and he had to complain to An Jia, how to be worthy of such a good An Jia.

What is An Jia like?

He is warm and strong, and he looks capable at any time. I have never seen him show timidity. He is also generous when he comes to chase me. If you like him, you like him. He loves seriously and pays meticulously. What is the answer?Is it enough to repay his liking?

And with the current results, can he and An Jia have a future?

Xie Feng tore off the page and threw it into a trash bag, feeling his throat hurt.

I am not good enough for him.Xie Feng thought.

After the evening self-study get out of class, An Jia was still waiting for Xie Feng downstairs, but seeing Xie Feng who was coming down the stairs amidst the crowd, his expression was not very good. He frowned slightly, and when Xie Feng walked in front of him, he handed the bag in his hand to He, "Today someone in class ordered takeaway and bought it for you, especially matcha."

Xie Feng opened the bag and saw a few round puffs, his eyes felt a little hot, but it was too dark An Jia didn't see it, the two walked slowly on the icy road, An Jia adjusted the scarf, seemingly inadvertently Ask him, "How was your day?"

Xie Feng didn't seem to hear him, and his eyes were fixed on a certain place in the air. An Jia sighed secretly, took Xie Feng's arm, and worried: "What's wrong? Can you tell me?"

Only then did Xie Feng come back to his senses and smiled, but in An Jia's eyes, that smile was forced and stiff, and his heart suddenly tugged. Xie Feng put his frozen red hand to his mouth and took a deep breath. His eyes wandered, "An Jia, what do you like about me?"

An Jia didn't expect him to ask this question, but she still thought about it seriously, "I think you are very special. When the only peers in my life were you at the beginning, I thought everyone might be like you. When you were my When I went to a bigger world, I realized that you are the most special, you are very quiet and sharp at the same time, I like it very much.”

Xie Feng was a little dazed when he heard An Jia. Others used words like Buddhist and interesting to describe him, but An Jia said he was quiet. This word sounded almost the same as quiet. He couldn't help asking, "Quiet?"

An Jia smiled, "Yeah, don't laugh at me, I secretly saw you sleeping, and I think that you are very quiet and lovable when you are asleep, and I like children who look obedient. "

Xie Feng shook An Jia's hand, and An Jia shook him back vigorously. He cleared his throat, changed his tone, and continued, "I like Xie Feng very much, although he is sometimes sensitive and doesn't know that he is alone. When people think about something, they frown, which makes me feel at a loss, but I am glad that when he is sad, he is willing to show me that he is sad, and now he needs me to comfort him. I don’t know what to say to him. It won't be sad, so I just have to say that I like him, so he will be happy."

Xie Feng was dumbfounded, and was led by An Jia into the stairway of An Jia's dormitory without knowing it.

An Jia quietly pushed Xie Feng into a dark corner, just like what Xie Feng did to him a long time ago, his voice was deep and sweet, like a piano piece full of emotion in the middle of the night.

"Except for you, I can't get used to anyone." After finishing speaking, he placed a shallow kiss on the corner of Xie Feng's lips, which had nothing to do with sex, but just the tacit comfort and understanding between lovers.

Xie Feng's suppressed emotions for many days finally collapsed under An Jia's few words and a kiss. He sobbed in a low voice, and An Jia heard him say intermittently without logic, "I don't think I'm good enough for you...really ...you are so kind...but my grades are so bad...they all left and I'm the only one in the class..."

An Jia hugged his shoulder wordlessly, silently guarding him.

He always felt that he was the one with a lower status in this relationship, but he never thought that his being too good would put Xie Feng under such pressure, that he would deny himself because of poor grades, and even say "not worthy" With such humble words, he never expected that Xie Feng's seemingly calm appearance would actually be so eager for company, that he would even become vulnerable because of loneliness.

He was sore and distressed at the same time. He just wanted to take him home and hide him. Those stupid negative emotions and messy things would never hurt him again. His eyes are so beautiful, so he should smile every day. with.

An Jia took out a tissue to help him wipe away his tears, and patted his back, "Okay, just cry." Her voice was undeniably firm, "You are not worthy of me, no matter what, I will always love you .”

It was a long time after this incident that An Jia realized that this was the first time he said "love" to Xie Feng, and the days after that seemed to fulfill his promise, and also seemed to be a prophecy, he really loved him for many years.

Time passed quickly, and it passed like a dream. Xie Feng was second in the class with 493 points, and Chen Ran was the first in the class with 504 points. Chen Ran performed supernormally. Xie Feng adjusted for a while before returning to original level.

Some time ago, he reduced the amount of questions to do, returned to the textbook, read it page by page, and found many small details that he did not pay attention to at ordinary times, and he could straighten his mind with fewer questions. The condition is much better.

It may be that An Jia often came to see him because she was worried about him. In the deep winter, the second high school canceled the morning exercises and went directly to dinner. What is particularly humane is that she did not enter the shift earlier, which is equivalent to an extra 15 minutes of rest time.

An Jia came to accompany Xie Feng at this time. The two sometimes chatted along the school road, sometimes went for a walk in the playground, sometimes went back upstairs and leaned against the railing in a daze, and sometimes said some irrelevant words:

"An Jia, where are you going?"

"My family told me to go abroad."

"Oh……"

An Jia propped her chin, "But I didn't agree, I said, 'Which one can't get into Tsinghua University and Peking University, I have to eat that bowl of foreign rice'"

Xie Feng laughed, "You are too crazy."

"What about you? What do you want to do?"

"I want to be a glorious teacher of the people, teaching and educating people." Xie Feng laughed.

"Haha, you are so great."

"No, I think the teacher has a lot of holidays."

"I knew it." An Jia looked sideways at Xie Feng and laughed.Xie Feng is much better now, with more smiles on his face, let's go on like this, the future is still far away.

The author has something to say:

Hey, hey, it's been a bit painful for Calvin recently.